Exit Stage Left
by FireStorm1991
Summary: Given the opportunity of a lifetime, a young, callous actor undergoes the challenges of broadening his horizon. In writing a play based on the personal trials of his past, his attention falls on an unsuspecting girl with problems of her own, bringing her into the limelight despite her desire to escape her past and stay hidden. Cover Art by LacieRhea on DeviantArt
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters**

 **I was going to wait until I had more chapters of this story written (currently, there's 4) before I decided to do the first posting, but at this point I figured I should just get this story rolling and get feedback. Happy New Year to everyone, and hopefully I'll get more stories updated soon. Enjoy!**

* * *

In a small town, a girl rode her bike with no destination in particular. She had just graduated from high school the month before, and soon she would be leaving town and going off to a new school. In just that one day, she had rode to all of the places that held memories for her, both good and bad. The first place she had gone was the movie theater she frequented with her friends in middle school, but hadn't been to since all the drama between the group had started. She even went to the playground where she had met her best friend. Now, she was sitting on the river bank, a place where she'd go to be alone unless Yusuke decided to join her.

Her cellphone rang an obnoxious tone that one of her older sisters had set for herself. The girl scoffed as she answered. "What is it, Ruka?" she snapped.

" _Botan, where the hell are you?"_ her sister, one year her senior, yelled. _"You were supposed to be here with the food an hour ago."_

"It's my going away party," Botan reminded the girl. "You can all wait. Shizuru told me to take my time, and that's what I'm doing."

" _I bet it's because you don't want to go into the restaurant the family of the friend you screwed over owns."_

Botan was used to the taunts. Ruka and Juri both tormented her for her past mistake. It hadn't even been her fault, but they would never let her forget it. "That's not it. I'll get there when I get there."

She hung up on her sister. Her words had irritated her to no end. Looking in the clear water, Botan could see her refection. The blue-haired girl looked so sad and stressed, and even the river couldn't hide that. Botan released a sigh before she grabbed her bike and set of for the Yukimura Diner, the place her ex-best friend's parents' owned.

"Ah, Botan, it's been a while." Mr. Yukimura greeted Botan warmly, but even she could tell his smile was forced. She had no doubt that the man held her responsible for the end of hers and his daughter's, Keiko, friendship. "I have your order all ready. Having a party?"

Botan smiled sheepishly as the man gathered her order. "Sort of. I'm leaving for school tonight, so my brother and sisters wanted to have a little get together."

"Oh, congratulations," Mr. Yukimura replied. "Where will you be heading?"

She had not been expecting him to ask her that, and her heart stopped when he did. There was no way she could tell him or it would cause many unnecessary problems. Just then, her phone rang again. "Oh, I'm sorry, it's my sister. I need to take this."

Mr. Yukimura just grinned in response as Botan put the money down and then answered her phone. She grabbed the food and rushed out of the establishment, leaving her change behind and dealing with Ruka's attitude. Thankfully, in a few hours, all this wouldn't even matter.

* * *

Botan returned to her family home and found all of her sisters lounging around. The music was blaring and not something Botan would have picked to play in front of the youngest child. "Can someone turn that down?" Used to being ignored, the girl went into the kitchen and found the oldest of her five siblings, Shizuru, smoking a cigarette while reading the paper.

Botan, age seventeen, was one of six children. Shizuru was the oldest at twenty-eight, and she was their legal guardian. She had taken over the role of their mother when Botan was seven years old, ten years prior. Their parents had been in a fatal car crash, but they had left their children the house and enough money to sustain themselves until Shizuru could find work. Thankfully, Shizuru had turned eighteen months before or the family would have been separated.

Next in the sequence was Botan's older brother, Kazuma. The redhead was only two years younger than Shizuru and became a father figure to at least Botan and Hinageshi, the youngest who was ten years old. He, Shizuru, and Hinageshi were the only siblings Botan could tolerate, though Shizuru had stopped getting involved whenever Ruka or Juri attacked her.

Ruka, well, she was a bitch, plain and simple. Her redheaded sibling made sure Botan knew her place in the family. Botan was the outcast with the obscure looks, and she was also not as pretty or sexy as Ruka. Her sister would rub her sex life in her face, and that always bothered Botan. The girl was only two years older than Botan, and she refused to go to college, mooching off Shizuru's and Kuwabara's earnings.

Juri was Ruka's little "yes" girl. Whatever Ruka said, Juri believed. She would also ridicule Botan every chance she got despite not knowing the details of anything being discussed. Juri was younger than Botan by three years. The girl would be fresh into high school in the next couple of weeks. Botan was sure she would turn into a little Ruka, and the thought disgusted her.

She was thankful she at least had a decent relationship with her ten-year-old sibling. Hinageshi was a newborn when their parents had passed. All she had known growing up was her siblings. She was oblivious to all the pain and ridicule of Botan's other sisters and never made Botan feel worse. Instead, Hinageshi stuck to her like glue.

"Botan!" Well, speaking of the little one.

"Hi, Hina," Botan greeted loudly, trying to overpower the music. She heard Shizuru scoff and looked to her. "What?"

"Do you have to be so loud?" her oldest sister asked.

Botan's face fell. "Me?" she retorted, flabbergasted. "I asked them to turn down their music! You can't hold me responsible for-"

"Ugh, quiet," Shizuru mumbled while grabbing her head. "Just get the food out. I'm gonna lie down. My heads been killing me. Just get them to shut that shit off."

Shizuru left Botan and Hinageshi alone in the kitchen, and the child seemed to notice Botan's sadness. The little girl never liked to see Botan sad, so she would normally do something silly to make her sister laugh. With that thought, she was about to try something, but Botan had already left the room to shut off the stereo. The house became silent, but Hinageshi could hear the irritated caws of her other sisters and grimaced. Quickly, she went to her room just in case the yelling started. She could not handle when her sisters yelled at each other.

* * *

Kazuma came home to find the place completely silent and sighed. There were food containers in the kitchen, untouched, which was rare for his sisters. He also found Botan sitting on one side of the living room with Juri and Ruka on the other, all looking insanely angry. "What happened now?" he asked.

"Nothing, Kazuma," Botan replied curtly. She then forced on a smile and looked to him. "How did it go?"

"My boss took it well," he remarked. "He was impressed that I was going to finish my graduate work. He gave me a rush on my last check. I'm giving half to you so you can get settled in your new apartment."

"Why does Botan get money?" Ruka snipped. "Are the rest of us chopped liver?"

Kazuma tried not to glare at Ruka, but he couldn't stand how ungrateful she could be. "Last week I used most of my paycheck to buy you the latest phone. Don't start. You know Shizuru and I treat you all fairly."

"Whatever," the nineteen-year-old muttered.

"Hey, where's the party at?"

Everyone's attention turned to the front door to see Botan's long-time friend, Yusuke, and surprisingly Keiko was with him. The brunette did not look happy. "Keiko," Kazuma greeted with a nod before he looked to his sister's friend. "Urameshi."

"Hey, come on, Kuwabara," Yusuke chuckled hesitantly while rubbing the back of his neck. "Aren't we on a first name basis by now?"

"No."

"Botan," Keiko forced a greeting before heading out of the room.

Botan could hear Juri and Ruka snickering, but they were immediately silenced when Kazuma's attention was on them. The decided to leave the room and head to the kitchen. They were ready to eat. "I'll leave you two alone," Kazuma offered. "Do you want to eat anything specific?"

"The chicken and noodles, please," Botan answered with a small grin. "Thank you."

Botan and Yusuke were left alone, and Yusuke finally let his amused and contented façade fall. "Sorry, Botan," he offered. "She wanted to go out tonight and I told her I was busy. If I lied…"

"No, it's okay," Botan assured him. "I'm just surprised she wanted to come, all things considered."

"Yeah, well…she doesn't trust us being alone together," Yusuke nearly growled. "I figured she'd get over it once we started dating, but she's just…I don't know."

Botan grinned at him. "Sometimes I wonder how she managed to ensnare you," she teased.

Yusuke smiled slightly and shook his head. "Beats me. Anyway, how was it picking food up at her parents?"

"Her dad asked me about college," Botan responded. "I had never been happier about Ruka calling to bitch at me in my entire lifetime. I didn't want to tell him."

"Yeah, it doesn't need to get back to Keiko that we're going to the same school," Yusuke commented. "It's cool that your brother's working on his doctorate. He took a year off, right?"

Botan nodded. It had always bothered her that Kazuma had had to drop out of his Ph.D. program in order to take care of the family. It was around the time Shizuru had been dating some playboy, Sakyo. When he broke up with her, the eldest of them all had suffered from severe depression. She kept calling in sick and nearly lost her job when Ruka finally called Kazuma to complain that there was never any money for new clothes because Shizuru was wasting the money they did have on cigarettes and alcohol. He had chosen to leave school and take care of the family until Shizuru got through the depression phase. He had kept the family together. "I don't care if Keiko knows he's going there, but she would go ballistic if she knew I was there, too."

"Don't worry about it," Yusuke responded. "I'm the one who has to deal with her jealous crap, not you, and I can handle it. Trust me."

Botan hated it when Yusuke told her to trust him. She did trust him, but every time he said those words nothing worked out. "I'm gonna head to the school."

"What, now?" Yusuke asked, surprised.

Botan nodded. "I'm not all that hungry and I just want to leave. Tell Kazuma I'll see him at the quad party tonight. I'm gonna go say goodbye to Hina and then get out of here. Ruka, Juri, and Keiko all in the same room doesn't really appeal to me."

Yusuke's expression became grim. He knew he couldn't talk his friend out of this, but he really hated that Botan didn't feel like she could be in the same room as Keiko. Their fallout was entirely his fault. He wished he could take it all back. He had tried to explain to Keiko numerous times, but she never wanted to hear it. Unfortunately, they all needed to live with his mistake. "See you later tonight, Botan. Drive safe."

That was all Botan needed to get on the move. She gathered her last few bags and said goodbye to Hina. She left without saying anything to anyone else. Yusuke could relay her message, and he would do it in private so that Keiko didn't know Botan was going to the same school. What Botan really needed was to get some distance and get away from her old life.

This new town would be an open page.

* * *

"That's the fifth page you've crumpled up."

"Shut up, Kurama."

The first speaker, Kurama, looked to his roommate and chuckled. "Hiei, you need to lighten up. You can't write a masterpiece overnight."

"I said, 'shut up,'" Hiei growled.

Hiei looked to his redheaded friend and scowled. He had been working on his biggest project for hours and still had gotten nowhere. Everything he seemed to write on paper was pure garbage. This was not what he was used to.

Hiei Jaganshi was a dark-haired, bad boy that had made a name for himself in the thespian world. At a young age he had been separated from his twin sister after his mother died from illness. A kid with a bad attitude, he could never get adopted, but he didn't let that deter him. Acting was the biggest deal in the city he lived, so he studied anything he could regarding dance, vocals, instrumentals, and theatrics. He had become famous by age fourteen.

At that time, he found his sister. He had been enrolled into a good private school that had a great acting program. His sister happened to be there. It had been strange to him, but Yukina had accepted him easily. That was around the time that he was adopted by their mother's friend who had been forced to give him up by her own mother. Hiei remembered that and held no ill will towards the woman. He was thankful she was willing to provide a roof over his head and some stability.

Now, he was of legal age and off to college. He and his sister decided to attend the same school. His sister was attending to be a writer. He, of course, was going for theater, and the school gave him the right to write a play, hold auditions, and perform it during the spring semester. He accepted the offer. However, writing a play and acting were two completely different things. If he accomplished this challenge, he would be able to graduate a semester early and give himself more exposure. That was appealing to him.

The words were not coming to him, though.

Kurama, his long-time friend, sighed. "Hiei, you can't force these things. You have a month to come up with a full script, but you'll never get inspiration by holding yourself away in this room. Come to the quad tonight. I'm sure you'll get plenty of inspiration there."

"Feh," Hiei scoffed. "There won't be anyone there besides drunken fools. Even you have to admit that."

"Not everyone in college drinks," his friend reminded him. "Me, for example, and yourself. Our two other roommates are scheduled to arrive soon. I bet they will be fine, too."

"You're too optimistic," Hiei bit out. He then thought about what Kurama was saying. His friend was usually right about these things. Maybe going to the party for a few hours to get inspiration wasn't a bad idea. "I'll go to the stupid party once our other two roommates get here. What do you know about them?"

Intel was Kurama's specialty, and he would always deliver. "One is around our age. Yusuke Urameshi, age eighteen from Sparrowfield. Kazuma Kuwabara is also from Sparrowfield, but he's a graduate student completing his doctoral work. He's a bit older."

Hiei nodded, thankful that they didn't sound too horrible. Of course, he'd have to meet them to form an impression. Sparrowfield, though, was a small, desolate town. He had never met people from there, but he heard plenty of stories about the girls at the schools throwing themselves at anything. The men were rumored to all be after females, as well. Hopefully, those rumors were just rumors.

"Now," Kurama said, "how about I make some tea before the others get here?"

Hiei looked down to the half-filled sheet of paper and scowled before crumpling it again. "Fine."

* * *

Their roommates hadn't been too terrible, though Hiei could tell right away that Kuwabara didn't really like Yusuke all that much. It was clear they knew each other. At first, they acted like simple rivals, but Kuwabara's attitude was colder than Yusuke's jocular countenance. Something did not add up between the two.

"This place is the shit!" Yusuke exclaimed excitedly as he took in the crowd. It truly was crowded, many students from all around campus mingling under the light of the paper lanterns and torches. "I can't wait for Botan to get here."

Hiei saw Kuwabara's expression sour, but did not say anything. "Speaking of, she left before us," he stated. "Did she tell you she got here?"

Yusuke paled when the redhead asked him that. "I thought she was going to call you."

Both boys seemed to grow very concerned as they both took out their phones, ready to call this Botan person. "Now, now, no need for that," a chipper vice cut through the masses. "I'm here."

"You didn't call," Kuwabara growled at his sister. "You scared the shit out of me."

"Sorry, Kazuma," Botan offered weakly. "I kind of fell asleep after I unloaded the car. Um, thanks for suggesting the apartments instead of the dorms, Kazuma. I feel a lot better being able to keep my stuff separate from my other roommate. She's really great, by the way."

Her brother sighed, but nodded. "Fine. You're off the hook."

"Now that we know she's safe," Yusuke stated before motioning to his other roommates, "Botan, this is Kurama and this is Hiei. They're mine and Kuwabara's roommates. They're first years, too."

Botan looked over to the smiling redhead and deadpanned, spiky-haired teen. "It's nice to meet you both."

Hiei eyed the woman warily. For some reason, her appearance bothered him, but then he realized she looked a lot like his sister and his mother. The site of her blue hair was probably bringing back memories he'd rather keep buried. He couldn't fault her for that. "I take it you're from Sparrowfield as well," he stated, attempting to make conversation. His sister did say she wanted him to try to be more open and friendly.

Botan's face fell. The easy answer was, "Yes, I'm from Sparrowfield." The more complex answer would be, "Sparrowfield? You mean hell? Yeah, there…"

"She is," Yusuke butted in, answering for her. _Nice save,_ she thought.

"So…"

"So…"

"Why is this so awkward?" Yusuke grumbled. "It's supposed to be a party. We should all hit the dancefloor."

"Fine by me," Hiei remarked.

"You know I don't dance," Botan reminded her friend, glaring at him.

"Eh, try new things, would you?" the dark-haired teen said while pushing her towards the dancefloor. "I'll catch up."

Hiei rolled his eyes at the scene and pushed through the horde. He was about to find some random woman to dance with when he decided to look back towards Botan. The girl looked very timid, standing in the middle of the crowded dancefloor while trying not to get shoved aside. He decided to go for her. After all, she did kind of remind him of his sister. This was exactly the reason he suggested Yukina stay at her apartment that day. He didn't need her getting into trouble.

"Care to dance," he growled slightly.

Botan was so taken aback by the offer, but she figured if she went with Hiei, stranger or not, he'd pull her away from the people who were knocking into her and occasionally crushing her. "Sure."

From a distance, Kuwabara was watching his little sister dancing with his roommate. He had to watch as his sister's friend flirted with some women and scoffed in derision. "That kid," he grumbled. "He'll never change."

His eyes returned to the dancefloor and narrowed his eyes. He had only met his roommates the hour prior, but he did not get a good vibe from Hiei. Watching the guy dance with his sister was not very appealing, but he figured it wasn't as bad as Botan being left to the wolves.

Sighing, he went to go grab a drink from the bar. So far, Kuwabara really wasn't really liking this school.

* * *

 **A/N: So, I know the first chapter seemed kind of rushed, but I will be honest, there is definitely no fast romance in this story. I'm going to do my best to keep the characters in character despite the major differences from there anime counterparts. It will take a while to work on the following chapters, but I am hoping to update it again before the end of the month. Leave a review to tell me what you think. Thanks!**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters

Thank you to everyone who read and reviewed the first chapter, including the guest reviewer, **Heist**. I appreciate all of the feedback and interest in this story.

* * *

The next morning, Hiei was still frustrated. He remained in his and Kurama's room while his friend and Yusuke were sitting in the common area. Kuwabara had left early for his lab and hadn't come back. When they had returned last night, Hiei realized that the other two roommates didn't seem thrilled about sharing a room. It wasn't any of his business, but when Kuwabara stormed out that morning waking Hiei up, it was. Whatever their issues were, they were going to need to work it out.

Because, when Kuwabara slammed that door shut, Hiei was awoken from a dream that may have ended up being the answer to his problem. It left him feeling irritable that he couldn't come up with anything and, at this rate, he would never finish this script.

"Hey, short stuff!" Yusuke called out holding up a bottle of soda. "Come and join us."

"Don't you have anything better to do than sitting in front of a television?" Hiei scoffed.

"Hm," Kurama hummed. "I take it you didn't get the inspiration you wanted last night."

"Inspiration for what?" Yusuke asked in interest, glancing at his dark-haired roommate.

Hiei sighed while Kurama grinned at him. "Should I tell him, or would you like the honor?"

"Do whatever you want," Hiei grumbled bitterly while he crossed his arms and looked away.

As he did this, Yusuke still couldn't figure out what was going on. He looked to Kurama, wanting all of the details. "Hiei is Hiei Jaganshi, the actor."

Out of nowhere all the pieces were coming into place and Yusuke recognized…that he had no idea what his roommates were talking about. He looked between the two of them like they were crazy and in shock, but then he smirked. "So, you're an actor, huh? Anything I would have seen?"

"Hn," Hiei sneered. It was obvious to him that Yusuke probably wouldn't know who he is. His territory was the theater and, unless his roommate frequented plays, then he wouldn't know. Still, his name usually got around even to those who had never seen him perform. "I doubt it."

"Our roommate is working on writing a play that he'll be directing and starring in," Kurama continued to explain. "He will also be responsible for holding auditions."

"Provided I ever get this damned thing written," Hiei grunted bitterly. He knew he only had one shot at this. "I don't even want to think on the music front."

"Hey, I know someone who might be able to help with music," Yusuke said excitedly.

"Beatboxing doesn't count," Hiei responded.

Yusuke seemed slightly offended by that. "I wasn't talking about beatboxing. I know someone who's a great pianist and lyricist. She could help."

"If it's one of those girls you were flirting with last night, don't bother. I'm not interested."

"Hey, I wasn't flirting!"

Kurama smiled nervously and sweat-dropped. "Now, now," he said motioning his hands in a downward motion, "there's no need to get defensive. I'm sure Hiei will keep your decision in mind for later. I'm sure he'd prefer to get an idea first."

"Don't patronize me," Hiei snapped harshly. "I don't need someone to speak for me."

"I have a suggestion," Kurama said smoothly, knowing he'd get his friend's attention. "Why not talk to Yukina? She is a writer. Maybe she'll give you some pointers."

"Is this Yukina person Hiei's girlfriend?" Yusuke snickered. He stopped as soon as Hiei's venomous eyes settled on him once again. "What did I say?"

Hiei simply sighed in derision, shook his head, and left the room. Yusuke looked to Kurama for answers. "Yukina is actually Hiei's sister."

"That guy has a sister?!"

* * *

Botan had woken up early to find her roommate still asleep. She smiled thinking of something nice to do for the girl. Yukina really was a sweet girl, and she had listened to Botan complaining a lot about her family when she showed up. Well, she wouldn't have started complaining had teal-haired girl not offered to listen.

It all started when Botan showed up. Yukina was already there setting up her room. She had brought a bunch of stuff for the kitchen including a beautiful tea set that the girl had explained was a gift from her late mother. Botan had been happy when she met Yukina, because the girl had greeted her so warmly and asked her how her travels were. She helped Botan unpack and they agreed to put her small television in the common area. Botan wasn't too worried about Yukina trying to take it. The two of them became fast friends. They chatted over tea once the car was unloaded before Botan's stomach growled. Yukina instantly offered to make her something to eat. Botan tried to reject the offer, but Yukina insisted. Then, Yukina asked Botan about where she had come from and that led to the discussion.

At Botan's silence, Yukina instantly looked to her and knew something was wrong. She offered to listen, though Botan was really reluctant to discuss her problems with someone she didn't know, so Yukina told her a few of her problems. She had been so trusting to tell Botan that she was actually at the school with her brother who was an actor and that the two of them had been separated at a young age because their mother had gotten ill. Yukina had been raised by her mother's closest friend, but the woman's mother would not let her take in both children. Botan's heart broke for whoever this boy had been. Yukina explained, though, that he made a name for himself in the thespian world. Botan caught herself wondering if she was familiar with the guy's work.

So, because Yukina was so honest with her, Botan decided to explain a bit of her situation. She explained that she lost both her parents in a car crash shortly after her youngest sister was born and that the two oldest siblings became their parents, for the most part. She decided to confide in Yukina the reason she had lost her best friend and how two of her sisters made her miserable because of that and how different she looked from them. Yukina hadn't judged her and believed everything that happened between Botan and Keiko to be a misunderstanding caused by her best friend. Yukina even said that she was thankful Botan came early so that she could prepare her something to eat since she missed out on her party.

Their conversations then became pointless as they talked about random stuff. They were both hopeless romantics, but secretly they were both into videogames, loving the storylines. Botan was attending the college to become a songwriter while Yukina wanted to be a writer. They both loved ice cream in a way that was borderline obsession. Yukina told Botan that her and her brother called ice cream 'sweet snow' as a joke since they had been raised in a very cold place where it snowed quite a bit.

Eventually, Botan's stress and exhaustion caught up with her and Yukina's herbal tea had helped to relax her, so she had fallen asleep. When she woke up, she realized that she was late for the party. She offered for Yukina to go with her, but Yukina politely rejected saying that she didn't really enjoy those types of parties and her brother preferred her to avoid them. Botan could understand, but she had promised to meet Yusuke and her brother. She confided in Yukina that her brother was also going to the school, but that she wasn't sure she wanted anyone else to know her situation. Yukina promised to keep it quiet.

Botan didn't want to wake the girl up, so she quietly left the apartment. She decided she was going to pick up breakfast for them, doughnuts and muffins, and then later they could go shopping for whatever Yukina didn't get and grab their books. That would give them a free day to do whatever they wanted before classes started. Yes, that had sounded like a good plan.

* * *

Hiei had showed up at the apartment about thirty minutes after Botan had left, completely missing her. He knocked on the door and sighed when there was no answer. He knew his sister liked to sleep in. It was just one of her qualities. He, unlike Yukina, was an 'early' riser, mostly because he could barely sleep as it was. Surprisingly, though, Yukina did answer the door moments later. "Sorry about that," she said with a small smile. "I decided to set an alarm to start getting myself used to early hours again."

"Smart," Hiei commended. "I need your help with something."

"Still having trouble with the script?" Yukina asked. Hiei nodded. "How can I help?"

Hiei took a seat at the small table and buried his head in his hands before releasing a frustrated sigh. He wished his sister could tell him what his issue was. "I can't figure out what to write. Everything I put on paper seems empty. I don't even know what the plot is yet."

Yukina grinned knowingly as she moved to put the kettle on the stove. "I think you're overthinking it," his sister admitted. "Writing can be complicated, but you don't need to overcomplicate it. You can think of a basic plot and then build on it."

"It's not just the writing," Hiei grumbled. "I need to write the songs, too."

That made Yukina think of Botan. She didn't know where her roommate went, but she hoped she'd be back soon to meet her brother. "You know, we both know a very great story that you could use," she reminded him. "Our parents' story."

Hiei scoffed and rolled his eyes. Yukina always saw their parents' story as some great love story that ended in tragedy. That is basically how it happened, but the tragedy was their good-for-nothing father abandoning their mother pregnant. Innocent as always, Yukina didn't hold ill will towards the man. She always felt like he must have had his reasons, but Hiei held a great deal of hatred for the man he had never met.

But then, Hiei was struck with an idea. Surprisingly enough, it was related to his dream the previous night where a woman had been left pregnant like their mother had been and yet overcame the challenge. He wished he could have seen the end of that dream, but now that he thought about it, his mother had been the ultimate survivor until her illness. His expression soured as he remembered how he and Yukina lost her and the separation, but there was really no one he could blame save their father and a cruel, heartless woman.

"Maybe," Hiei replied as his sister placed a cup of tea down in front of him.

At that moment, Botan had returned to the apartment with a box of doughnuts and a bag of bagels and muffins with various cream cheeses. "Hey, Yukina, I didn't know what you liked, and I had a gift card so I went nuts with breakfast."

Yukina chuckled and moved to assist her. It was then that Botan noticed Hiei sitting at their table and Hiei had recognized her as the girl from Sparrowfield. "Hey, I know you."

"Hn," Hiei scoffed. "Obviously."

Yukina tried to hold in her amusement at her brother's reaction. He had issues around girls, mostly stemming from Rui's mother and some other people he couldn't trust and co-stars. "So, I guess you do recognize my brother, then?"

"Hiei is your brother?" Botan asked in surprise.

"Yes, I told you he was an actor."

Hiei glanced over at his sister, looking at her like she was crazy. Why would she advertise that to her roommate? The girl probably was like her friend and didn't know a thing about the performing arts.

"Oh wow, I don't know why I didn't make the connection before, but I have to admit I never got a chance to see your plays," Botan prattled on. "You're Hiei Jaganshi, aren't you? Surprisingly, I always pictured you as a blonde."

"Surprisingly, I've heard that one before," Yukina teased. "So, wait, if you didn't know he was my brother or an actor, how do you know him?"

"My friend, Yusuke, and Kazuma are rooming with your brother and Kurama," Botan explained before turning her gaze back to Hiei. "Can I ask how Kazuma is doing today?"

Hiei eyed her strangely wondering why she only referred to Yusuke as her friend yet her concern was for Kuwabara, but he let it go and only answered with a shrug. "I wouldn't know. I woke up when he slammed the stupid door. He was off to his lab or whatever. Mentioned it last night. He doesn't like that Yusuke guy much."

Botan frowned and sighed. "Well, alright. That's to be expected I guess."

"Don't worry, Botan," Yukina chimed in a cheerful voice. "I'm sure they'll be able to work out their differences. Brother, can you keep an eye on them?"

"How did I end up with the job of babysitting? Besides, one of them is what, in his mid-twenties? I'm not their keeper. I need to get back to this dang script."

"Script?" Botan questioned. "Are you rehearsing for something?"

"You could say that." Hiei instantly stood up and was ready to leave, thinking she was too curious and wanting to get away. She still made him feel uncomfortable with her looks. "Thanks for the advice, Yukina. I'll keep it in mind. See you once I get a few pages done."

"Wait, Hiei…"

His sister's roommate was starting to irritate him. She hadn't really done anything to him, but to hear that she recognized his name left him feeling frustrated. He could only hope she wasn't like most girls. Most girls went after him just because they knew he was an actor. Botan actually knew what he did. So far, she wasn't treating him differently, but she had just found out and been surprised. He didn't want this girl to use his sister to get to him.

Reluctantly, he muttered, "What?"

He looked to the blue-haired girl and waited for her to speak. She looked a little hesitant, he was sure she was either going to ask for an autograph or a date. "As I said, I went kind of crazy with breakfast, so if you want to take some doughnuts, muffins, or bagels with you for you and the guys, that would be okay. I doubt Yukina and I will get through all of this."

That had genuinely shocked Hiei, the fact that despite knowing he was an actor and being somewhat familiar with his work, it didn't change her tone. She was still talking to him like he was an actual person and not someone famous. "Fine," he remarked as Yukina started putting some of the stuff together into a bag for him.

"Hey, Hiei, tomorrow Botan and I decided we're going to have a free day," the teal-haired girl told her brother. "Would you and the guys like to join us? We were thinking of going into town."

The thought of his sister going into town with a girl that could barely handle a dancefloor was far from appealing. He grimaced at the thought of anything happening to Yukina. "Sure. I'll let the idiots know."

"Thank you for relaying the message, Hiei," Botan said softly. "It means a lot."

Hiei snapped his attention back to her, once again thinking the girl was crazy. Maybe high. He really wasn't doing her a favor at all. He was only agreeing to go because his sister was going. As for the others, Yukina had just offered for the other guys to come and subtly invited them. This had nothing to do with his sister's roommate, yet she was thinking it was.

Surprisingly enough, though not completely unexpected, Botan didn't really get boundaries and walked out of the apartment with Hiei. Hiei really wanted to return to solitude. His sister understood, but this girl was a different story. "What do you want?"

"Yusuke and Kuwabara don't get along because of me," she explained. "Yusuke is my best friend, though, so Kazuma tries, but he's just so mad at him because of a big misunderstanding. Please, if you can, try to get them talking to each other. It would mean a lot to me if they could set aside their differences."

"Look," Hiei growled, "I barely know you people. I'm not getting involved with your drama when I have enough of my own. This sounds like nothing more than high school bullshit, and it needs to stop. They'll have to grow up sometime and, when they do, they'll get rid of all that crap and talk. Until then, I'm not doing shit."

"I guess I can understand that," Botan admitted. "Sorry, I just got a bit carried away. Anyways, it was really nice to meet you, but I need to finish getting some of my boxes unpacked so Yukina and I can go to the store."

"Do me a favor, woman," the dark-haired man grunted.

"Yeah?"

This girl sounded far too happy and chipper despite the fact that he had something important to demand of her. "Don't go around broadcasting my sister's location."

And with that, Hiei left Botan alone outside of the apartment to wonder why exactly he had just acted so callous towards her. He shrugged it off, determined to start working on his project.

* * *

When he returned to his dorm, he found Kurama missing and Yusuke still watching the television. He wondered where Kurama had gone, but he realized that his friend most likely went to get his textbooks. He knew he'd have to go at some point, but for now he wanted to get to work. Before that happened, though, as he placed the breakfast items on a counter, Yusuke's phone rang.

"Hey, Keiko," Yusuke had greeted. "Yeah, I got settled in. Kuwabara's actually my roommate." Hiei rolled his eyes, figuring out that his roommate was talking to his girlfriend or something. Of course, he was right, because a fight broke out. "Hey, lay off. I've been telling you for years that it was a misunderstanding and my fault. Don't give me grief about her brother being my roommate." Yusuke sighed in frustration. "Look, Keiko, I don't want to get into this argument with you again, okay? I love you, and that's all I can say. I'll call you later."

Yusuke ended the call and tossed his phone to the other side of the couch and let out a frustrated groan. He turned to look around and saw Hiei. "Oh, hey…didn't know anyone else was here. Where'd you get the food?"

Hiei scoffed and said, "Your friend, Botan. She's rooming with Yukina."

"Ah, cool, so she's rooming with your sister," Yusuke replied with a nod. "That's good. From what Kurama says, she sounds really nice. Botan needs that."

Hiei remained impassive as he walked towards his room. He didn't care about his roommate's or his sister's roommate's issues. So far, he wasn't too thrilled with these people from Sparrowfield. So far he apparently had an irritable roommate who hated the idiot in front of him because of some pointless girlfriend issue for Yusuke. At the same time, his sister had a nosy roommate who just wanted her friends to work it out. This woman he barely knew was a meddler and already making him feel uncomfortable. It would be best to avoid these people. They would only end up getting in his way.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters, the song "Outta My Head" by Chris Daughtry, or the song "Let it Rain" by Kris Allen.

* * *

It took Hiei about two weeks, locking himself in his room for hours at a time and foregoing sleep, but he finally managed to have a rough outline of a script and one song. The song had been harder to write than the story, and he knew he'd need to hire someone to write the rest of the music. He hated the idea, but it couldn't be helped. He would make sure they did what he wanted in a way that wouldn't take away from the play's plot.

Finding a songwriter would have to wait until later. Unfortunately, Hiei had to hold auditions. He needed to find someone who would be his co-star. The song he wrote would be something he and some background people would have to sing. It was for a pivotal moment in the play, the moment where the character representing his father would be consumed with thoughts of his mother.

Yukina had had a great idea bringing their parents' story into the mix, but Hiei planned to tell the story from a more cynical point of view. Still, the majority of the play would be a romance. It was a role Hiei wasn't necessarily fond of playing, but he could do it. He just needed to find the perfect co-star that wasn't a cliché love interest. The person needed to stand out in some way without trying to get her moment of fame. It needed to be natural. He couldn't have some woman hanging all over him or falling over herself due to his fame.

"So, are you ready?" Kurama asked his friend.

Hiei glanced over at him, his expression bored and unamused. "As I'll ever be."

"So, these five girls made it through the audition scene perfectly," Kurama informed him. "They all have dancing experience as well."

"Great," Hiei replied monotonously. "I will be playing a recording I made of me singing the song. I'll dance with each other the girls for a few measures. Watch our chemistry. I'll be looking to see if any of them grab my attention."

Kurama smiled at his friend and nodded, and Hiei took his place on stage. He glanced at all five of the women individually. Two blondes, a brunette, and two redheads stood in front of him. They were already cliché as they stared at him with expectant, excited eyes. Still, he needed to be sure. Any of them could surprise him.

The music was started by Kurama and Hiei instantly started dancing with one of the blondes. He watched her as he led her while listening to his recorded voice singing, _"I thought it would be easy, but it ain't for me. It's kind hard when you lay your heart out on your sleeve. I really thought by now, it would have slipped my mind, but the kind of love sent from above is the killing kind."_

As he danced, he could feel the girl not able to respond to his movements. Thought she had dancing experience, it was different that just letting her body act according to his. Hiei was sure that Kurama also noticed that they had no chemistry whatsoever. Instantly he let the woman go and moved to the next one, one of the redheads.

" _Put my mind to rest and try to sleep it off. It'll be alright when the morning comes. Or am I wrong?"_ She was certainly pretty, but she was unoriginal. Hiei was sure that she would not stand out at all, nor would she be a good fit for him. She was a stereotype. Nothing about her struck him in any way, shape, or form. He decided to dance with her a little longer, just to see if anything about her would 'wow' him.

" _Ain't no doubt about it; I can't live without it. Trying to forget you, but I can't get you out of my head."_ Hiei started thinking of how he would like the background dancers to move during this scene. He'd have to hold auditions for those soon, he supposed. For now, he could just picture dancers in periphery grabbing their heads and falling to their knees trying to break themselves free of the thoughts of this all-consuming woman. _"Just when I think you're gone, you come back and turn it on, and just like a simple song I can't get you out of my head."_

Clearly, Hiei had no problem getting this girl out of his head. The feelings she evoked were lackluster, and Hiei needed substance. He moved on to the other blonde. She, too, did not stand out to Hiei at all. Her movements, however, were graceful. She could get through the scene, most likely, without any errors. One word struck Hiei as he danced with her. As the words, _"Well I saw you dancin', dancin' in my dreams. I saw your face and I can't erase all the things I've seen,"_ played, the word "robot" came to mind. No, he determined when the music continued, _"Even if I try ('cause Lord knows I've tried), I can't escape and I can't shake the pain inside."_ She was not the one, certainly not enough to elicit the right emotions.

He moved to the final redhead, the second to last girl he needed to audition. Again, there was no chemistry. She simply looked at him like she was concentrating deeply before a grin took over her thoughtful expression. _"Crazy as she comes and crazy as she goes, I'm holding out my hands with nothing left to show. Guess that's the way it goes."_

Hiei released her almost immediately and went for the brunette, hoping to get something to work with. The girl, surprisingly, tried to take the lead, smiling seductively at him. His calculating expression instantly became a glare. No, she was not right for the part either, despite her clear, confident air. She, too, was released, and Hiei demanded Kurama stop the music, to which his friend listened.

"Hey, what gives?" the brunette snapped.

Hiei remained impassive as he regarded her. "What's your name?" he asked her.

"Koto," the woman replied impatiently, hands on her hips. "I asked you a question. You barely gave me any time at all to show you what I've got."

"Believe me; I can already tell more than enough," he shot back, disgusted.

Hiei began to leave the auditorium, needing some air. He hated being around overly clingy, rude women who wanted nothing more than to advertise herself in a play that actually meant something to him. He had no doubt this Koto would have done just that.

"Where are you going?" she asked indignantly, her shrill voice carrying across the room.

Hiei turned to his friend and shook his head. "If this is all we have to audition, then the actresses here are in sad shape. I'll be back when I've figured out the answer."

And with that, he was out into the halls of the performing arts building.

Walking through the halls, Hiei was still trying to come up with something. Most likely any of the girls _willing_ to audition would not hold anything for him. He couldn't figure out who was _unwilling,_ either. If he wanted to get his show prepared in enough time, he needed to hurry.

Out of nowhere, something caught his attention. It was a voice he hadn't expected to hear and it was coming from the choral room. Of course, the room should have been empty since there was no choir classes that day, but someone was definitely in there.

To his utter shock and amazement, the woman in there was Botan, a girl he hadn't seen since the outing with her, his sister, and his roommates two weeks earlier. She was singing her heart out, moving to her song, with no audience. It had been captivating.

He stayed and watched.

* * *

Botan had had a nice two weeks of classes. Most of her courses actually had her singing or writing music. She was given access to the choral room for use of the grand piano. It was like heaven.

This room was her escape from everything going on. Even away from home, her sisters still harassed her. She had only been calling to check on Hinageshi, Shizuru even. But of course the other two would be the ones to answer the phone each and every time she called, not letting her speak with either of her two sisters. She still had to deal with their pointless slanders and taunts. Instead of feeding into it, though, she just hung up when they brought up Keiko and how her schooling had been coming. Botan really wished the best for her old friend, but she didn't want to discuss her, not with them. If she were going to discuss her at all, it would be with Yusuke, and that still wasn't appealing.

But this room was her safe place. She didn't have to hide her anger. She didn't have to pretend to be something or someone she wasn't. This was her place to just be. _"So many things are trying to keep me, and so many voices trying to reach me,"_ she started singing quietly, thinking of a song that described everything she was going through so she could release all that negative emotion. _"To tell me that this is not the way. To tell me that this is my mistake._

" _Oh, let the rain keep falling down, 'cause it won't stop me from getting where I'm bound. Maybe I'm crazy; maybe it's too late, but I'm gonna make it. Don't care what the skies say. So, oh, let it rain, let it rain."_

Feeling a little more relaxed after belting out the refrain, she began to walk around the room as if she really was running and making her escape, a smile on her face, unaware that she had an audience outside the room. _"I know that this is not the way that you imagined it would be. Oh, but nothing you say is gonna stop me, no matter the weather that you bring!"_

She ran up the risers, careful not to crash into chairs and threw up her arms as she looked up to the heavens and shouted, _"Oh, let the rain keep falling down, 'cause it won't stop me from getting where I'm bound. Maybe I'm crazy; maybe it's too late, but I'm gonna make it. Don't care what the skies say. So, oh, let it rain, let it rain."_

" _So many things are trying to keep me,"_ she continued quietly, looking ahead of her. _"So many things are trying to keep me, and so many voices trying to reach me._

" _So, oh, let the rain keep falling down,"_ she shouted again _, "it won't stop me from getting where I'm bound. Maybe I'm crazy; maybe it's too late, but I'm gonna make it. Don't care what the skies say. So, oh, let it rain, let it rain._

" _Let it r-"_ she started until she heard the door open, and then she immediately clamped up, wondering why anyone was there seeing as she was told she'd have free rain over the room when the choral classes did not meet. Turning to see who had invaded her safe space, Botan met eyes with her roommate's brother, and he was staring at her intently.

Hiei had been so captivated by not only her voice, but her free spirit. He had just spent a good amount of time dancing with a few pretty girls, but Botan had been the one to unknowingly capture his attention. The moment she realized she was being watched, though, she silenced herself. Hiei found himself wanting to hear the rest of the song and see the raw emotion she was pushing through her voice. "Finish," he coaxed, a slight order.

"I…" Botan started to say, looking away from him. She hated getting caught when she let loose with her singing. She especially hated singing her heart out in front of others. She could handle choir where she would have to restrain herself, not to outshine her fellow singers. This…this was new territory. Hiei was almost a stranger and he caught her letting herself go…and he wanted more. "I can't."

Hiei's calculating gaze softened as he heard her words before a smirk appeared on his face and he chuckled. "You're perfect for the part," he said, earning Botan's shock and confusion.

"Part? What part?"

"Kurama's been auditioning women all day for a role in my play," he informed her. "All of the girls are fake and stale. They couldn't bring to the role what I just saw you accomplish in this very room. Come to the auditorium, now."

His voice was commanding that Botan's body was about to go with him, but she got control of herself and shook her head. "No, I can't do it. I've never acted before, Hiei. I couldn't do it. You need someone more qualified."

"The fact that you think you can't do it makes you perfect for the role," he told her. "I'm not looking to hire just some professional because they have experience. I'm not looking for a girl who thinks she can rule the stage. This play…it's personal to me. I don't want someone who feels no emotion. I want you. Auditorium. Now."

He wasn't going to let this go, and Botan wasn't sure she could escape him as he blocked her path. Sighing, she relented and nodded to Hiei. "But I haven't prepared whatever scene you have for audition."

"Don't worry about that, now," Hiei ordered. "I just need to see something."

"Well, alright then," she breathed out as she walked with Hiei to the stage.

* * *

Kurama hadn't been surprised by Hiei's reaction to the girls. He could see it in his eyes and in the girls while they danced with Hiei. Though Kurama didn't understand how Hiei's mind worked sometimes, he knew that none of the girls would satisfy him. Hiei was taking this play personally, and Kurama could sort of figure out why. His friend had never been open about his past, but Kurama knew the basics. It was possible that Hiei was finding an outlet for his anger through his play. In addition to the anger, though, Hiei would be going through very complex emotions, and he needed an anchor. He needed a co-star that would play off of his emotions and not just see him as an actor they needed to get in with.

That had been Koto. Kurama knew that she only auditioned for the play because she wanted to put on her profile that she had been in a Hiei Jaganshi play. She kept saying that to the girls after Hiei had left. Arrogantly, she told them she had done the best and would be casted in the production. She didn't know how wrong she was.

Moments later, Hiei returned. It was surprising to the redhead that his friend returned at all, but it was even more surprising that he was not coming back alone. It was that Botan girl, the friend of their roommates' that they had met briefly. She looked nervous, fearful even, and then she looked to the girls who were all glaring at her. An amused grin appeared on his face, and for once he was glad he went again his gut reaction to dismiss them after Hiei had left. Things were about to get interesting.

Hiei led her onto the stage. He then looked out to Kurama and said, "Botan will be auditioning as well. We'll save the scene study for later. Continue playing the song and, again, watch to see on our chemistry."

"Hiei," Botan was about to interject, but the music started playing and Hiei instantly pulled her to him. She was very conscious of where his hands were, one holding her hand and the other resting on her hip as he glided her across the stage. His eyes were on hers, and she couldn't look away. Her mouth slightly agape as she felt a wave of emotions passing over her consciousness as if she were feeling the pain of a troubled soul. This was a reason Botan knew she couldn't act. She was always so in tune with others' emotions that their nerves and terror would rub off on her. No, it was easier to sing synchronistically with people in choir or perform solo. This was completely outside of her comfort zone.

Hiei, though, was already feeling satisfied with his choice. This was serious for him, and having overly excited women who knew nothing about the turmoil he felt going into this play did not appeal. He felt like the chemistry was better, and was actually thrilled that Botan wasn't jumping at the chance to be his co-star. It meant she was humble, something those other girls who auditioned lacked. He needed a humble woman he could connect with over the course of this play. Already, it seemed like she understood how he must be feeling, because he had already seen a flash of empathy cross her features.

Plus, she wasn't trying to lead him. That was always a plus.

This girl was strange, not at all what Hiei had expected, and he had only seen her in a different light for ten minutes before his opinion drastically changed. He assumed she would be like the rumored girls from her hometown. He figured that if she knew of his play, she'd be itching to do something for it just because she knew his status. He believed she would be nosy and ask him why he wanted her instead of trying to give him reasons to look elsewhere.

She was none of those things.

Hiei hadn't even realized that the song had stopped until Kurama cleared his throat and he looked out to see his friend's shit-eating grin as well as the angry stares of five women. "I think it's safe to say you've made a decision, haven't you?" Kurama teased.

Hiei nodded and then looked to Botan. "Congratulations," he said dryly. "You've been awarded the part. I'll get the script to you sometime over the next few days." He then looked out to the other girls. "If we find need of any of you in the course of the play, you will be called provided you leave your contact information with Kurama."

"What about an understudy?" Koto asked in frustration, her hands returning to her hips.

Hiei narrowed his eyes dangerously at the girl. He did not like her pushiness at all, but he knew she'd continue to harass him. "If you want to practice the lines just in case, fine," he scoffed. "But I doubt we'll need you. You will be called if you are needed, again, if you give your information to Kurama."

Koto swiftly moved to give the redhead her number before she stormed out. All the other girls followed suit. That just left three, and Hiei had left Botan alone on the stage to consult with his friend. The blue-haired girl felt her airway constricting, panicked over what had just happened. She had just been offered the role of a lifetime.

And she wanted to be anywhere else but there.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the song "Reflection" by Jim Brickman. By the way, when that scene comes up, listen to the song. I have a few instrumental, piano songs in this story that definitely sets the mood. But just so you have an idea of what's going on and what the characters are hearing. :) This story gets a lot of its emotion through the music. Happy reading and listening!

* * *

It felt like he was working with a phantom. Two weeks had passed since Hiei had held auditions for his play and he had yet to get in touch with Botan. He used to pass her randomly in the halls of the cultural arts building, but they did not cross paths. Even visiting his sister's apartment didn't help. Botan was never home when he showed up.

If Hiei had actually taken time to consider this phantasmal behavior, he would have realized that Botan was avoiding him. Instead, he grew irritated and ended up leaving the script with Yukina to give to her roommate. Along with that, he demanded Botan show up in the auditorium in two weeks to begin rehearsal. Why was he waiting that long? Well, he was still trying to get in touch with someone to write the music for the play. There was hardly anyone out there, though, that he would trust to match the mood set by his plotline.

He had gotten in touch with someone he had known a long time ago that had been a producer, yet he didn't trust him fully. Shigure was one of the few who had helped him get off the street, yet he was just as dangerous. Hiei had placed a call, but if Shigure gave him a price, including copping in on his deal, he would figure something else out.

 _That_ he wouldn't let happen, not with something so personal to him.

* * *

Botan had arrived home after she was freed from her music theory course. She had managed to get out of the building through a "secret exit" she came across in her avoidance of Hiei.

She still couldn't believe that he cast her in his play. The whole ordeal was unbelievable. When Hiei had shown up at hers and Yukina's apartment, he didn't seem thrilled with her. He accidentally heard her singing and now she was the only one he wanted starring in the play alongside him. She didn't even know what the story was about. Of course, she knew he had been wanting to give her the script.

Eventually, she'd have to face him. There was no way to evade him forever, especially living with his sister. He wanted her in his play. Hiding for a while would not change that. Something told Botan that Hiei would not give up without a fight regarding anything that he wanted. She'd have to surrender eventually. For now, though, she was putting it off.

Releasing a sigh, she placed her bag on the table and noticed a large manuscript titled "Spaces." She wondered if Yukina had been working on a new book. The teal-haired girl wasn't around, and Botan's curiosity took over. She decided to check out the passage.

She was surprised to see the story in script form, but it was possible that it was Yukina's specialty. It was about a love story with a girl named Hope and how she had captured the attention of a man named Preston. It seemed like Preston was the main character for the most part. Botan didn't even get through half of the book when Yukina exited her bedroom. Their eyes met, and Yukina smiled at Botan who said to her, "This is really good."

"I'm glad you like it," Yukina replied. "Hiei hasn't gotten to talk to you yet, but his play is about how our parents met and their story."

Shock was visible on Botan's face at the many revelations, including the fact that she wasn't reading Yukina's manuscript, but actually Hiei's script for the play she'd be performing. She instantly blushed and became flustered considering she was one the page where the lovers shared their first kiss. "Th…This is the script?" she asked in surprise.

Yukina grinned and her eyebrow quirked at her roommates antics. She had wondered what the girl thought it was, but decided not to embarrass her further. "Yes, though he said it's unfinished. The writing is done, but he's struggling to find someone to write the music for the play. It's very personal, so there's not many he's trusting with this. I'm glad he decided to go to you. I think you'd be perfect for the role."

Botan couldn't believe that even Yukina had approved of her for the role. What was it about her that both twins believed she could play the role of their mother that well? There was nothing special about her. She was a small-town girl and had absolutely no experience with this. Sure, she wrote music and sang, but hiding behind a piano and in a crowd of other singers was much easier for her than being on a stage in front of multiple people, front and center.

"Anyway, Hiei said the rehearsals are in two weeks, hopefully," Yukina continued. "He contacted someone he knows about the music. I'm sure everything will get worked out."

Botan really hoped so. Or, maybe if it didn't, she wouldn't be forced on the stage. But thinking that way was horrible, because she knew from what Yukina had told her that Hiei really needed this. She sighed again in surrender. She would do this, but only for Hiei so that he didn't lose his deal.

* * *

Hiei was frustrated. A few days had passed, and Shigure had yet to answer him. He wondered if the man just wanted him to figure things out for himself. He had started him on the thespian path, but maybe that was the extent of their relationship. If that was the case, fine, but at least call and leave a message saying it, or better yet, say it to his face.

He was back at square one, and he really needed to get the play underway. Unfortunately, he might have to look into the talent of the students at the school. Considering how auditions went, he wasn't entirely sure how thrilled he was with that idea. After all, a lot of students were just trying to make a name for themselves. If he was being honest with himself, having a student write music for his play was probably the worst idea he could come up with, but it was the only one he had.

 _Shit,_ he thought bitterly. _I'll have to hold auditions again._

Out of nowhere, he heard the sound of a piano being played in the choral room where he had seen Botan singing her heart out. Through the closed door, he could hear a very beautiful piece. He decided to enter, seeing as the last time he did he found his star actress. _Maybe I won't need to._

Surprising to him, he found said star actress sitting at the grand piano, her fingers gracefully gliding across the keys. His normally tightened jaw went slack, dropping at the sight of the blue-haired girl so into the music she was playing. It was so full of emotion, and it seemed to be drawing him in. He didn't even realize he had walked up to her until the gentle sounds of the piano got louder. He was nearly touching her before he realized he had gotten too close.

The song was getting more aggressive, but still had a very light, pensive tone before it began to soften and one of her hands went to the keys that produced a higher pitched tone. The melody ended soon after, her hands leaving the piano as she let out a contented sigh and began to write something down on a blank page of sheet music.

A smile graced her lips as she gathered her belongings together, including a tape recorder that she abruptly turned off when she was done recording. She turned around and almost immediately stumbled back at the sight of Hiei standing in front of her, his brow creased in what she was going to guess was confusion. "Um…hello," she greeted awkwardly, looking away from him. He really needed to stop popping in on her in her private moments. She hadn't been ready for anyone to hear that song, not until her recital in the spring.

"You play really well," he complimented, causing Botan to blush and withdraw even further into yourself. "What was that song? I've never heard it before."

"You wouldn't," Botan admitted. "It's something I've been working on for my profile. I wrote it."

He seemed stunned by the revelation, but kept his cool as he stated, "You write music."

"I do," she answered, getting ready to walk away.

"How would you like to do more for the play?" he asked her smoothly. "I'm in need of a songwriter. If you wrote a piece like that, I can only imagine what you'd be able to do for the play."

"I'm not a lyricist," she tried to counter. "I can only write instrumentals."

"I'm not a writer or a songwriter, yet I managed to write a play and one song," Hiei argued, his voice forceful and demanding. "We'll work together on this. We can meet tomorrow to begin working on songs. Maybe even start rehearsals of the scenes and add the songs in as we write them." It was not a suggestion.

"You're asking a lot of me," Botan stated. "Why are you so adamant about my participation in your production? You could have professionals who would do a superb job with everything. Why me?"

Hiei pondered her question for a moment. It was clear that she really didn't want to do this, yet she would agree anyway. "Because you're different," he told her. "I don't want stereotypes in this play. This isn't some cliché fantasy or romance. This was a story that actually happened. It's personal. I don't want anyone cashing in on the story that can't appreciate what it really, truly is."

"Yukina told me…that it's about your parents," Botan whispered, feeling his emotion radiating off of him. She sighed and shook her head. "I understand what you're saying, but you don't even know me. You don't know that I won't try to cash in and use this. You don't know what kind of a person I am or anything I may have done wrong. I don't think I'm right for you."

"That alone is how I know you won't try to take advantage of this story," Hiei explained. "You're fighting me on this. If you truly wanted to showcase yourself, you would be jumping at the opportunity. As for your past and everything, that doesn't matter to me. We're costars. It's business. All I need to know is that you won't betray my trust and that we have chemistry together on the stage. So far, both those points are covered."

Botan knew she was dragging this on and that they were talking in circles. It was getting tiring, and she really just wanted to run away. Instead she stayed and said, "How about we start right now? Tomorrow I need to meet with one of my teachers about the song I just finished."

A smirk appeared on the dark-haired actor's face. "You have yourself a deal, woman." Botan's brow furrowed when he called her that. "Let's get started."

* * *

Hiei could believe a lot of things. He could believe that a lot of people were trying to claim their moment of fame from his hardships. He could believe he made the right choice by picking his sister's roommate out of all the other girls. Though surprised, he could also believe also believe that the blue-haired girl was an amazing pianist.

What he couldn't believe was that he actually had a decent time that afternoon.

They already had another two songs written and the start of a melody for another. They had spent time spitting out random words from the show or that reflected the feel, and Botan seemed to have an endless amount of melodies to go along with them.

It was strange for Hiei to enjoy menial things, but it was even stranger that he enjoyed them with another person. Though, maybe it was just because he was making progress with his show. Now that they had two songs written, they could hold rehearsals. They were actually scheduled to meet this Friday. Kurama had sent the e-mail out to all the other cast members. It was time to get the process started, and in between rehearsals, he and Botan would continue to write songs for the show. His show was the most important thing to him right now. And as for his relationship with Botan…

To him, it was strictly business.

* * *

Botan got home and released a sigh, but wore a small smile on her face. Working with Hiei had been…not so bad. It surprised her that Hiei was so adamant about having her in his show, but she did know he had some deal going for him. Whatever it was seemed really important to him, and she knew she could make it easier on him just by accepting to help.

She felt like they had a nice afternoon and hoped that Hiei had enjoyed himself too. Though she didn't know him that well, she'd say he did. He seemed to act better around and towards her, and she hoped that meant they were on their way towards friendship. After all, they were going to be seeing a lot of each other now that she was one of the lead characters and the songwriter for his play.

Botan thought about what her brother might say if she told him that she took on this huge project in her first semester. She knew everything would be fine. She had to write songs for her recital in the spring anyway. Working with Hiei allowed for her creative juices to flow. She already had an idea for a song, but she didn't know if she could execute it properly. Well, she would find out tomorrow. For now, she had to listen to the song she had just finished today so she could put the notes down on paper. That would probably take the longest. She'd have to do that with the songs she and Hiei wrote that day as well.

 _Well, I guess I'll be up for a while longer,_ she told herself. _Better see what I have to eat._

Botan looked in the fridge to see if she could find something and saw that there was a Tupperware container full with her name on it. Yukina must have made dinner and saved her some. It made Botan smile. She really had a wonderful roommate. At least she knew she definitely had a friend in Yukina. Maybe things would fall into place with Hiei.

Well, she could always hope.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters

* * *

It was almost Friday, the first day of rehearsals. Botan could hardly believe how quickly everything had fallen together. The week before, after they had their first couple of songs, Botan found a note in her apartment telling her to show up in the auditorium. The note was clearly from Hiei, though why he had wanted Botan to meet him when they weren't scheduled was another mystery entirely…

That was answered that afternoon.

Botan had decided to humor her costar, but found the auditorium empty save for the red-haired man who was with them during her impromptu dance audition whom she had also met threw Yusuke and her brother. Curious, Botan walked down the ramp of the aisles and set her songbook and bag down on the table. "Um, hi, Kurama…I don't know if you remember me, but I'm…"

"Botan," he finished for her, "I remember. How are you today?"

The girl sighed, "Fine, I guess. I think I'm supposed to meet Hiei here soon."

Kurama chuckled. Unfortunately, that was not why Botan was there. Hiei had left a note for him that morning saying that he needed him and Botan to hold auditions for the orchestra. That was one thing about Hiei that Kurama had gotten used to over the years. His brooding friend did not like to interact with people he deemed useless. Until someone he trusted picked the people they deemed worthy, Hiei wouldn't bother. It was an ultimate sign of trust that Hiei left them responsible for finding the orchestra for his show. Of course, Botan didn't know Hiei's intricacies, nor would she be happy with the fact that she had to choose with him.

"I'm afraid it's just us," he replied softly with a smile. "Hiei has tasked us with holding auditions for the music. He sent out the first song you both wrote together to students in the wind symphony and orchestra courses to rehearse. He wants us to pick who we think would be best suited for your music."

Botan was evidently shocked, but not for the reason Kurama assumed she'd be. Though Botan did not know Hiei as well as Kurama did, hearing stories from his sister made her realize that she had been given a big honor…and he didn't even really know her that well. "Does he honestly think I can pick people out?"

"According to him, you have a good ear," the redhead reported, grinning when the girl in front of him blushed as the compliment. "Besides, you're the one coming up with the scores for all the instruments. I figured you would know best, as well."

"Thank you, I guess," Botan murmured sheepishly before taking a seat and looking at a list of names. "I guess we should get started, then."

* * *

It took a couple of hours before they had their orchestra. Finding the best pianist for the part was Botan's main concern. She had voiced the desire to Kurama that when she wasn't on stage, she wanted to be playing the music along with the orchestra which had surprised the redhead. Because of this, though, Botan had to find someone with a similar style to herself, and was thankful when her fellow classmate, Ayame, walked in. She knew Ayame from many of her classes and, though the black-haired lady seemed cold and quiet, Botan could sense that she was really just focused and had little time for interaction. It would be great to get to know her better throughout the show. Out of all those auditioning, her style was as close to Botan's as one could get, so it made her decision much easier.

She and Kurama ended up discussing their choices after everyone had left, and their conversation went on for hours, especially when the conversation veered to their personal lives. At first it had been innocent, Botan asking Kurama where he was from. He explained that his mother lived close by and that he visited often to help her with his step-brother. His step-father had passed away the year before.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," Botan offered, feeling pain for the two boys. "That must have been terrible for you."

Kurama nodded once, but didn't look too distraught. "To be honest, I wasn't very close with the man. Shuuichi is the one suffering along with my mother. I'm used to not having a father present."

Botan hesitated. "D…Dare I ask why?"

Kurama offered her a sad smile. "My father passed away when I was a baby," he explained. "My mother raised me on her own, and I hardly ever respected any man she brought home. Kazuya was a decent man, but he was always busy with work. He didn't take care of himself, and now his wife and son are left to deal with the fallout."

"That…wow," Botan breathed out. "It sounds so complicated and horrible. Are you sure you're okay? I was young when my parents died and I'm still suffering."

She was met with silence, but saw Kurama's stoic expression soften into one of understanding. "I wasn't aware you lost your parents. When did this happen?"

She turned away from her brother's roommate and looked down to the ground. "When I was seven. My sister and brother took over for them. We have three other sisters, two who hate me and one who was only months old when they died…"

"That must have been difficult for all of you," Kurama empathized. "I assume your sister and brother who took over are not much older than you."

"Well, Shizuru is about ten years my senior," Botan told the redhead. "Well, once I turn eighteen, anyway. Kazuma is only two years younger." At Botan's statement, Kurama's eyes grew wide. "What?"

"Kuwabara is your brother?" he asked receiving a nod before he chuckled. "I'm sorry. To be honest, Hiei and I both thought he came off as a jealous ex, but it makes more sense seeing him as a protective older brother. I had a feeling there was more to his and Yusuke's conflict. It's surprising that he hasn't murdered him for flirting with other girls."

Botan sighed. "Yup, that's Yusuke, but it's harmless. His girlfriend stresses him out quite a bit. It's not really her fault, though, considering everything that happened between all of us."

Kurama was once again stumped. He thought for sure that Yusuke was Botan's boyfriend considering how much the teen spoke of the girl, and now knowing that Kuwabara was her older brother and his attitude towards Yusuke seemed to support that. "My apologies, again. I believed you to be Yusuke's girlfriend."

At that, Botan sucked in a surprised gasp and she refused to meet Kurama's gaze. He honestly thought the blue-haired girl looked like she was about to cry. "Please, never say that again. We're just friends and we always will be."

"I take it something bad happened between you two," Kurama guessed. Botan's silence was the affirmative. His curiosity got the better of him causing him to ask her what happened.

Botan's wary eyes met his calculating ones. "You'll look at me and Yusuke differently, and I don't want that."

"I am a lot more understanding than most, Botan," Kurama assured her. "You can tell me. I will not judge you. Obviously, I hit a nerve somewhere and I would like to know how and why so that I don't make the same mistake twice."

Another sigh left her before she began to confide in yet another person what happened between her and her best friends. "Well, it started back in middle school…"

* * *

" _Yusuke, Keiko, and I had been best friends since our early childhood, so much so that we did everything together. As happens with most close friends, Keiko started liking Yusuke and confided that in me. Now, Yusuke was always rough around the edges and he had a lot going on at home that he confided in me and not Keiko. You see, Yusuke liked Keiko, too, and he was afraid she'd see him in a different light if she knew what was going on in his home life._

 _It was sometime after my parents died when I started spending more time with Yusuke. Keiko was a great friend, but she didn't know what it was like to have lost parents. Where Yusuke hadn't lost a family member, his father had left when he was young leaving his mother to take care of him, and his mother was an alcoholic so some days it was like she wasn't even there. Anyway, around that time, Yusuke did everything he could to make me feel better and it always worked. This was before he and Keiko liked each other, and I was the one with a crush. Years later, though, I realized I loved Yusuke like the troublesome older brother getting me into trouble half the time. I felt differently than Keiko did, and when she told me it didn't even bother me._

 _Unfortunately, though, that was around the time Yusuke's grades started slipping. Keiko was always a great friend, but if we ever starting falling behind in school, she became overbearing and would hover over us making sure we were getting to class. You see, Yusuke's mother's drinking had gotten worse, and so were a lot of the things she was saying to him. It left him feeling alone and like he didn't belong anywhere. He started getting into street fights, cutting classes, and failing some subjects by not doing the work. Keiko, instead or trying to figure out why he was behaving that way, lectured him daily about getting to class and doing his homework. The two of them fought all the time, and Yusuke was getting frustrated beyond belief._

 _Eventually, she pushed him too far. Keiko had asked him if he wanted to end up like his mother and he basically told her to leave him alone. He was seething when he found me, and I tried to calm him down. It seemed to work, but I didn't realize that the only reason he calmed was because he figured out a way to get to Keiko._

 _He asked me to go out to the diner with him, which I thought meant he wanted to get something to eat and talk some more, so I agreed. I let him tell me everything going on at home and what his mother had been saying. It had been so horrible, and I could feel what Yusuke was feeling. I offered him to come over whenever he felt he needed to escape. I saw his expression soften when I offered a sympathetic smile and whatever anger he had left in him was gone. He even told me later that where he had asked me out to get to Keiko, his plans all stopped then and he just felt a pull towards me._

 _I got up to leave because my sister, Ruka, called me telling me to come back home, and when I did stand, Yusuke jumped up, told me to wait, and kissed me. I was so in shock that I didn't pull away, but that was right when Keiko walked into the diner. Everyone at school had known how close we all were. They knew Yusuke liked Keiko and Keiko liked Yusuke, but when everyone's attention was drawn to him holding me and Keiko screaming at us everything got blown out of proportion._

 _We both followed her trying to explain ourselves, but she felt like I betrayed her. She wanted nothing to do with me, and said that to my face, and Yusuke got angry at her for not even letting us talk. He tried to tell her that I was innocent in all of it and that if she wanted to be angry, she should be angry at him, which she was. She was angry at both of us, and then she called me some things that I'd rather not repeat. I know she was hurt and angry, but her words still hurt. She then told me she didn't want to be friends anymore and walked away._

 _At school, people were calling me a homewrecker. Of course, I didn't just get it at school. Ruka was treating me the same way, but she hated me anyway before that. In fact, she was the reason Keiko refused to listen to us. She had found my journal and found the entries from when our parents died and where I had had my crush on Yusuke. She was trying to make things harder on me and invited Keiko over on a day where I was off somewhere with Yusuke and showed her everything from that time. If I hadn't been caught up with both mine and Yusuke's problems, I would have realized that Keiko was becoming more detached from me for a while and that some of her irritability with our grades was coming from jealousy that we were spending so much time together._

 _Yusuke felt terrible, especially when people were shoving hateful notes in my locker or pushing me around. He was still the resident 'badass' among the students, so he figured if he went along with the rumors that we were dating, I'd be spared. We tried for a little while, but everything just got worse. I was struggling from having lost one of my best friends who only looked at me with disgust during our dating period, and Ruka started getting our younger sister Juri to slander me, too. I started skipping school myself just to avoid people, going to a small creek for hours at a time until the school called Shizuru and told her I wasn't showing up to classes._

 _I hadn't been talking to Yusuke either. I just wanted to be alone and not worry about anything or anyone. Yusuke had tried reaching out while I was skipping school. I didn't realize that he was just as stressed as I was._

 _When I came back to school, he tried to talk to me, but I didn't want to listen. It made him so angry that he started yelling at me. He was so angry with himself for the whole mess, and it just came out as he was berating me. He said I was acting just like Keiko and that I needed to grow up and move on. He also through some persona stuff I confided in him back in my face and the yelling stopped then. I had been in tears, and I actually left school that day despite the protests of our principal._

 _It took years for Yusuke to make up for what he did. At first, I couldn't look at him or be around him. I was so depressed, especially because stuff at home had gotten worse. Shizuru had dated this guy who was just using her. He left without a second thought and Shizuru started lying around the house, smoking and drinking. It had gotten so bad that Kazuma needed to come home from school which is why he hadn't finished his PhD. He had to hold the family together while Shizuru and I healed, and his anger towards Yusuke is because of what he watched me become during that time._

 _But Yusuke started coming around again when his mother got sick. He begged for me to just go for a walk with him. It was about eight months after our fight/breakup, not that we were really the traditional couple in any way. We went by the creek and he told me that he missed me and I barely responded. He asked me if I missed him and I just started crying right there. I sunk to the ground sobbing hysterically, and he was in front of me the next moment I knew. He said he was sorry and I could feel that he meant it. Those eight months were miserable for the both of us._

 _He swore he'd never use any of my fears or pain against me ever again, and that if I did I could sick my brother out on him. He told me that being away from me felt like being away from the sister he never had and that he couldn't do it anymore. He even said he loved me and that he would do anything to win my trust back as long as I gave him the chance. He also said he understood if I never gave him the time of day again._

 _I needed my best friend back. My life had taken such a turn and I just couldn't do it alone anymore. Yusuke told me that he had been trying to hurt Keiko with me, but that the kiss was actually spur of the moment because he was overtaken with emotion that I was being so understanding towards his situation. He wished she hadn't seen the kiss, because he honestly hadn't really wanted to date me in the first place. He realized while we were talking that yes, he was mad at Keiko, but all he really wanted was someone to talk to and someone to counter his mother's words that morning. That's what I had done, and him losing me sent him further into depression as well._

 _Eventually, we were able to repair our bond. We began confiding small stuff in each other the first few months and then things just felt normal again. We goofed off, sometimes skipping certain classes together, though much less than before, and only because it was like free ice cream day or whatever else our town hosted. He was even trying to help me find someone to date, feeling horrible that he practically isolated me at our school…for example when he pushed me onto the dance floor of the quad party. Keiko, though, I could see her eyes burning with hatred every time she looked at us together. She hated that we were still so close. We never spoke, and Yusuke seemed to avoid her._

 _Then, one day, something happened to her mother._

 _Yusuke went, but I stayed. I had wanted to go. I even texted her asking if she needed anything and she told me she needed for me to stay away from her and her family. I knew that if anything happened to her mother, she would need a support system, but she refused to let me in. Thankfully, her mother was just exhausted from working too hard._

 _Anyway…Yusuke started splitting his time between me and Keiko. Seeing her so upset over her mother reminded him of things that he liked about her. He asked me if I'd be okay with him dating her after all that happened. I had been surprised, but I realized that without me in the middle, Keiko could finally be happy with Yusuke. The two of them started dating and it was actually great in the beginning. Of course, Yusuke never told her when he was spending time with me._

 _Hinageshi, my youngest sister, got really sick one night to the point where we were all at the hospital at twelve in the morning. I called Yusuke and asked him to come because I was so scared. I hadn't realized that he had been at Keiko's and had fallen asleep while they were working on some project. She ended up answering the phone and told me to leave her boyfriend alone. I guess she told Yusuke I called. I think she believed that once he started dating her, he hadn't been hanging out with me at all. Yusuke told her that we were still friends and she had to accept that or their relationship would be over. He knew she was about to give him an ultimatum, but thankfully she kept quiet after that. Still, the disdain she held for me lasts to this very day. Yusuke has to deal with her jealousy and her constant phone calls. She doesn't even know we're at the same school together. I wish things were different and that she'd just listen to us. It all started with a simple misunderstand from five years ago. I don't think she'll ever get over it."_

* * *

Kurama watched Botan closely. She was still refusing to look at him even though she had finished telling her story not more than ten minutes prior. Everything she had told him was understandable, and he agreed that it was all a simple misunderstanding that had gone on far too long. It surprised him that Botan was so worried about what he'd think of her. She was afraid he'd judge her for being a 'homewrecker' even though she had done nothing wrong.

"I…" she spoke softly. "Please, don't tell anyone, Kurama, not even my brother or Yusuke, that I told you any of this. I just want to put all of that behind me. Keiko isn't here, and I won't be going back home until winter break, anyway, so I would just like not to think about it. It's bad enough I have to watch Yusuke and Kazuma hating each other. Kazuma used to like Yusuke. When Yusuke came over, they'd wrestle outside or even play video games. They had been good friends, too, before all of this, despite Kazuma being so much older. It's all my fault, the reason everyone is acting like this."

The redhead had heard enough of Botan belittling herself and decided to speak up. "Just because someone says it's your fault or even if people are acting this way over you does not mean that you were at fault in any way," he told her. "What happened with your friend, Keiko, was unfortunate, but you hadn't been trying to hurt her. You had been trying to help your friend. You don't want to blame him because he was suffering as well, but he shares some fault, as does this Keiko for believing your sister over you. Had she asked you straight out about your crush instead of berating the two of you, it wouldn't have pushed Yusuke towards you in that way. Your brother only cares about your wellbeing and, because of that, he holds a lot of distrust towards the one who caused you all that pain. I'm sure that one day, when you're past all of this and no longer suffering, your brother will be able to get over those feelings. Until then, he will probably watch Yusuke like a hawk to prevent him from hurting you again, or at least trying to. Again, you are not at fault or the cause of any of this."

Botan seemed to be surprised by his words before offering him a genuine smile. "I'm thankful you feel that way. Between you and Yukina, I've been able to see that not everyone hates me. Um, do me a favor, though, and please don't tell Hiei, either. Yukina already promised to keep quiet about my past."

A smirk appeared on the redhead's face. "Is there any particular reason that you don't want Hiei to know? I doubt he'd think much different from his sister or me."

"It's not that I'm worried about what he'd think," Botan assured him. "It's more that…well, I could tell from when he met me that he wasn't entirely thrilled about me, nor did he seem to like our town. I could tell from the way he spoke. Only recently has his feelings of me changed. Besides, he's my costar. We should really only focus on the play and not any drama that happened in the past."

Kurama understood, but he was once again curious. "If you're so against telling others, then why did you indulge me? Is there something about Hiei that you were more concerned over?"

"Not at all," Botan stated sincerely. "It's just, I could feel that Yukina was a very compassionate person. You…you just seemed curious and I knew you wouldn't let it go. Hiei…I just don't want to feel that derision again, you know?"

"You say 'feel' quite often," he observed.

"Yeah," Botan answered with a nod. "I've always been able to sense certain emotions, which is why acting didn't seem like a great idea. It's different working with other people who might be nervous or jealous of someone for getting a role. It felt like that one girl really wanted to jump at me."

Kurama fought a laugh regarding that girl, Koto, who Hiei had sent on her way. Of course, to shut her up, Kurama gave her the role of understudy. She'd be around, but hopefully not often. What was even more interesting was that Botan fit the description of an empath, one who had heightened sensitivity to the emotion of others and took it upon themselves. It made sense, especially from the story she told regarding herself, Yusuke, and Keiko as well as some of the other players in their lives. He wondered if Botan knew just how deep her empathy ran.

A more entertaining thought came to Kurama's mind, mainly that Hiei would be working with an empath for the majority of the show.

A man who was closed off to other's emotions partnered with a girl who was open to every single one.

Now that would be compelling irony.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the songs "Smoke and Mirrors" by Lifehouse or "Rebel Beat" by The Goo Goo Dolls. I did, however, buy the songs :D

I will italicize all of the lines from the play as well as the song lyrics. During rehearsals, if lines are not italicized, they're the characters actually interacting. I'm sure people would have figured it out, but just to avoid confusion.

Also, sorry it took me so long to update. I've been working on completing other stories so that my attention could be focused on stories that require more planning or attention like this one. This story is very music-based so I have to focus on each individual song as I write, especially instrumental only songs. Plus, I injured myself…again, so that took some time away, too. Anyway, enough of excuse time. I hope you all enjoy the chapter. Thanks for reading!

* * *

Botan entered the auditorium and found it bustling with activity. The members of the orchestra were already setting up in the orchestra pit, even getting the piano set up near the exit so that Botan and Ayame would be able to shift off. According to Kurama, they were only going to go through the first two scenes that day, and Botan would only need to be on stage at the very end, the moment where the two characters see each other before the dance.

It had relieved Botan that she didn't have to memorize a million lines for the first rehearsal. She was busy working on her portfolio and her newest song that she just couldn't figure out how to end it. However, she had the script to read over and the songs to practice, so she had taken a break from that song and continued working on the play. She had time after all to complete her song.

As Botan walked over to the pit, she could feel heat on her back and swallowed nervously. It had to be Koto. She had most likely come to glower at her, for she really only had to be there for a few rehearsals. That heat made Botan feel so out of place and wary, so she did her best to push it aside and sat down at the piano.

Ayame was there already, even though she wasn't going to play that night. She still needed to know all the songs just in case Botan couldn't make it opening night. For now, she'd act as the girl's page turner.

Once over at the piano, her eyes surveyed the rest of the room. She hadn't seen Hiei at all, though she did still see Kurama. Still, Botan wondered where her costar was. The two introductory scenes were his own.

Botan still couldn't believe the story she read in the script. Right now, she was just in the beginning. She put more time into the songs this time around, but she and Hiei were scheduled to meet up a few days later to work on songs for the next few scenes. Botan had skimmed a little further when she first received the script, though she had not yet gotten to the end. She would most likely read further that night and start coming up with melody ideas for those scenes. For right now, though, she knew that Hiei's father had had a very troubled past. Now, Botan felt guilty for knowing something so personal about Hiei's past where he knew nothing of hers. She figured he wanted someone to know, though, and that was why he was writing the script. Of course, she didn't know the full story…yet.

"Alright, everyone," Kurama said smoothly. "Hiei is back stage and ready for the first scene. I need Anita on stage for the first scene to rehearse lines. Also, Takedo, I need you to sit with me and help me come up with a list for the stage crew and what we'll need scenery-wise. We'll take care of positioning and mannerisms next week. This week is all about learning your lines. With the dancers from the second scene mind getting ready backstage?"

She took a deep, centered breath trying to calm her nerves. To be honest, she was really excited to perform the songs for the first time, and she hadn't really had jitters until she had been surrounded by the other performers. It could be assumed that her jitters were a result of the others' anxiety at working with Hiei Jaganshi. That, of course, never bothered Botan. To her, Hiei was a normal person, distant and cold most of the time, but still a person nonetheless. She was strangely thankful she wasn't one to give into the hype or swooned at the sight of him. She was certain Hiei would not have enjoyed that.

She listened to the start of the scene. A stomp was made to sound like, as the script said, a car door slamming. _"So, that's it, Preston? You're really leaving,"_ the female, Anita snapped. _"Do you have any idea how much I've spent?"_

She heard the derisive sigh. _"You should have thought of that before you cheated. I was only doing this because of our parents' agreement. I don't need this, and I don't need you."_

" _Fine!"_ the woman shouted.

Botan heard the footsteps of the woman walking away. It would be different when they had a set, for then they would just need to focus a light on the "car" that Hiei would be "driving."

Being that the woman was no longer on the stage, the music began, drums and electric guitars taking the lead and Botan and the rest of the orchestra directing the melody with the piano before the instruments died down as Hiei sang, telling the story of his father's arranged engagement. _"_ _There was a time, was a place back when you and I were living alone together. We held each other in the middle of the night and swore we'd somehow make it better. We set our sights on the big city lights, no moss on these rolling stones, and here we are with everything we ever wanted, but now we're together alone."_

Anyone could have empathized with the man, set up with a woman only to see the relationship falling apart. Hiei reached the chorus, the music getting louder to reflect the raging emotions that his father must have felt, the desire to run away. _"Gotta break out of this place we're in, runnin' out of time and out of sin, we were living smoke and mirrors anyway. Gonna drive all night 'til we disappear, chasing down the miles so far from here, as the smoke and mirrors start to fade away we're still the same."_

Botan knew the lyrics insanely well since she and Hiei had spent a lot of time on this particular song. It was harder for her to come up with lyrics than using the music to echo the emotions in the script. Hiei had struggled as well, but mainly because he didn't pity his father. No, everyone would most likely be stunned by his play, for his goal was to tell the stories he grew up hearing. They would make anyone empathize with the man, until later he screwed everything up. Up until his father abandoned his mother, their story was like any other love story, like Yukina had implied. His play was going to have a lot of levels, not just some simple romance, not the story with the male protagonist with the heart of gold overcoming obstacles.

It was going to be just like life, ending in disaster with the message of internal strength overcoming obstacles, not love.

" _I remember thinking we could make it out somehow, if somehow we ever took a chance,"_ he sang, keeping his mindset of that of a person who had been trying to salvage the petty relationship. _"We packed up what we had and threw it in the trunk, didn't give our life a second glance. Now the days roll hard and the nights move fast. They say be careful what you wish."_ Eventually his father had given up on the relationship and left the woman behind only to return to his overly controlling parents. Hiei mentally scoffed. The man always catered to them. He should have had more strength than that. _"But having everything means nothing to me now, what we had is everything I miss."_

Hiei repeated the chorus, thinking of what he'd like to have done for the set, a model of an expensive car with a screen behind that they'd be able to play footage of someone driving down the highway, getting further and further away from one trap, entering another before he met the woman he would eventually leave behind. _"Gonne drive all night 'til we disappear, chasing down the miles so far from here, as the smoke and mirrors start to fade away."_ He added the bridge, giving the first insight to the plays message, that inner strength conquered all. It sickened him that his father's character was the first to spew the words, but for the twists and shocks throughout the play to work the way he needed them to, the seemingly main character would need to be the one that the audience believed would succeed _. "And we're all we've got so let's hold on tight to the dreams that came before the fight. We were living smoke and mirrors anyway. We're still the same."_

As the scene would continue passing mountains and lakes into the urban city, the background singers repeated, _"We're still the same,"_ and then proceeded to cry out in tune with the song which faded out, the song beginning to end. That would have to be where the footage ended showing tall buildings and skyscrapers. The scene would end with him getting out of the car, the lights singling in on him as he walked into what would look like the door of an office building, his father's parents' company.

The first scene's line rehearsal went very well, but he Hiei believed it because there weren't many lines to mess up on. He was the one who sang with only a few background singers. Most likely, he wouldn't need to rehearse that scene again until they first got ahold of some props. He would discuss with Kurama and Takedo what they had thought and what he wanted, and they would settle on a happy medium. Takedo was in charge of the stage crew, so he would be able to tell Hiei what they could feasibly do.

"I believe that went well," Kurama announced to which Hiei nodded his agreement. The following scene would be a little more complicated. It would start in the office, then go to a conversation between Preston and his friend, and then there would be the dance number as they walked down what would look like a busy city street.

Hiei looked to all of the other actors and narrowed his eyes. Some were conversing while others were working on assignments, none of them prepared backstage accept for the dancers as Kurama had action. The commotion in the auditorium was infuriated. He needed to set the example and expectations for these people. Glaring hard at the mass, he stamped down hard on the stage creating a loud noise that reverberated in the theater.

Everyone's attention was on him. "I understand that we all have assignments to work on, but if you're supposed to be on stage for the second scene then you need to figure out when you need to get backstage the scene prior. If you cannot learn to time yourself and be prepared for your entrance, especially once we have our set and props, you'll find yourself being replaced. Those reading for the part of Preston's parents and his friend, Jeice, should already be backstage with the dancers. Any questions?"

A girl raised her hand, so Hiei nodded to her. "I'm not a dancer for the musical number, but I am part of dancing couple number three at the club when the song transitions. How will we be doing the transition?"

"Good question," Hiei remarked, thankful that some of these students weren't idiots. "Towards the end of the number, the dancers will phase out and exit on their respective sides. Once I speak with Takedo about the set later, we'll see how we'll work the stage crew changing the set throughout the scene. For today, we'll just get through the number to the end without practicing leaving the stage. Once the song is over, they'll be done for the day, and the club dancers will come on the stage. You all have copies of the song, so it's up to you how you want to time yourself and be ready to enter the scene. I don't enjoy wasting time."

The girl thanked him for explaining and then the three other actors playing those three individual characters he mentioned had rushed to the stage while he answered the girl's question. They were all thankful someone had a question so that they had a little extra time on stage. Now, they realized they'd have to pay attention to what was going on around them. The rumors of Hiei Jaganshi's preferences were definitely holding true. He was a perfectionist, dictating this in the first rehearsal. They were not going to combat his idiosyncrasies.

Those in the orchestra started whispering to each other and laughing at everything going on above them. Botan, though, found no humor in it. She understood how important this play was to Hiei. Yukina had explained it all to her. She felt a little bad, keeping it from Hiei that she knew, but he didn't want him to be angry with the teal-haired girl.

Apparently, the school had allowed him to use their stage and resources to put on this play, mainly because it would bring in a ton of publicity. It would also give the students useful experience and teach them to be professional actors, actresses, and instrumentalists. This was the real deal for them. Hiei, though, had a deal riding on this play. There was a company that was giving him the chance to impress them with his abilities to not only act, but to come up with original ideas and his own songs, or at least work well with people who could. If the play was a success in the eyes of the company's manager, Hiei would be offered a job with them and the company would pay his tuition and board. Though Hiei was well-known and famous, he wasn't rich. He needed this, and so Botan was going to do everything to help him succeed.

"Hey," she snapped earning the attention of the other players. Surprisingly, she was loud enough that Hiei and Kurama, as well as some of the other students heard her as well. "This is not a joke. You're all here because you want to experience what it's truly like in the thespian world. It isn't high school. You aren't here to talk with your friends or be disrespectful to your fellow classmates. Making fun of them getting scolded is what children do, and I doubt any of us who truly care about this show want to work with children."

There were a few mutterings of "sorry" and "yes ma'am" going around before Botan sighed and then smiled at them. "Now, let's take a…five minute break while they work on the scene. Make sure you're back for the first rehearsal of 'Rebel's Cry.'"

The others were thankful and quickly and quietly made their way to the exit. Ayame stayed back with Botan and grinned. "I think you handled that well."

"I hope so," Botan replied. "This show isn't a game. It's a learning experience and should be treated as such."

Botan and Ayame also left, not noticing that those in the auditorium heard everything that was said. Hiei's eyes were wide, but still hardened as his mouth dropped slightly open in surprise. When he heard the loud whispers of the orchestra being projected, he became even more irate and was about to turn around and blow up on them, but apparently the woman had beaten him to it. She was stern, strict, unyielding, and then she still kept the players happy by offering a break as a compromise. She demanded they treat his play and the actors with respect, meaning she demanded they treat him with respect as well.

It was strange to him. This girl made it clear she wanted nothing to do with this show, yet she cared so much about it. He remembered their conversation when he practically demanded she be his songwriter. She had tried to combat him, saying he didn't know her and if she would try to cash in on his show. If Yukina told her the play was about their parents, she potentially told Botan about the deal, yet Botan was not asking to be a part of it. She only agreed because he wanted her and refused to work with anyone else. She didn't have anything riding on this show, absolutely nothing to gain from him, and she hadn't even tried to work with him so that she could put it on her resume. She cared about the show, but it was only because he did.

He was so stunned, as were the rest of the students, but he quickly regained his composure and narrowed his eyes at the ones who had stood up to get backstage, but froze when Botan spoke. "You heard the woman," he growled out. "Now, take your places and we'll continue."

* * *

During the break, Botan went to get a juice from the vending machine before she returned to the auditorium. She decided, since she had a few minutes left, that she would watch the students at work. She knew she could get back to the pit before the song needed to be performed. Besides, Ayame was already back in the pit.

She watched Hiei, his expression sour as he stood before the actors playing Preston's parents. _"I can't believe you walked out on Tracy,"_ the woman spoke. _"What are we supposed to tell her father? Our companies' union was dependent on the marriage."_

" _It wasn't a good fit,"_ Hiei as Preston stated turning away from the woman, looking out to the audience. Botan's breath nearly hitched as she watched the emotions pass over his features. _"I didn't love her."_

" _Feh, love,"_ the father scoffed. _"This match wasn't about love. It was about money."_

'Preston' turned back to face his father, a heated glare passing through the man and taking him aback. _"It was about money to you. I don't give a shit about such trivial matters."_

The father grew angry and nearly moved to strike the boy, but refrained and took in an uneven, shaky breath. _"You will start 'giving a shit,' or else you'll find yourself on the streets. I've trained you to take over this company, but if you can't even make one, simple sacrifice-"_

" _Sacrifice?"_ Preston asked indignantly. _"That wasn't a sacrifice. That was a farce, father. How good would it have looked for either company if that bitch had another's child?"_ His parents both looked surprised. _"That's right. Precious, innocent Tracy has been sleeping around the past month. I only just figured it out. I wasn't putting up with that garbage. If her father has a problem with it, you can tell him about his precious daughter. I want no part of her."_

" _You dare spread such rumors?"_ his mother asked, clearly not having heard him.

Botan frowned, knowing she needed to get back to the pit. She honestly loved watching Hiei act. She had never had a chance to go to his plays, but she always heard how amazing he was. He was so passionate and intense, so precise and fluid as if he had fully become this other person while still being himself. It was magical, Botan thought, but then she chuckled at her romanticized thought.

She started heading down to the pit, still listening as the scene progressed. _"I don't spread 'rumors,'"_ Preston sneered, emphasizing "rumor" like it was a disease. _"I speak the truth, but I can do little to make you believe me."_ Preston knew he wouldn't get anywhere with his parents. They had one view of the world and of his character, and so he decided to walk away. He was done explaining himself. The marriage to their almost partner's daughter was never going to happen.

" _W…Where are you going?"_ his father demanded.

Preston looked over his shoulder before walking off the stage. _"Out."_

When that part of the scene was done, Hiei nodded to the two actors reading from their script and they were able to return to their seats. They were done for now.

In keeping with Hiei's speech earlier, the actor who would be playing Jeice immediately walked on stage with his script in hand. He had been watching Hiei's last scene and was stunned that he already seemed to have the words memorized. The student realized Hiei wrote the play, but it still amazed him. He only hoped he could become as good an actor during this experience.

He smiled at Hiei as part of the script. _"Hey, Preston,"_ Jeice greeted. The scene was supposed to take place in a coffee shop, Preston's character waiting in line as he was noticed by his friend. _"I didn't know you were back in town. How's the missus?"_

Preston glared at Jeice. _"Don't fucking call her that,"_ he demanded. _"I'm done with her."_

His friend frowned and smacked a hand on his shoulder. _"Well, I know what that means, and I take it you need to get away from you parents for a while?"_ Preston grunted an affirmative answer. _"Hey, there's a new club that opened up downtown. Very low key. You'd probably like it."_

Preston knew the downtown area well. He grew up in the city and frequented the downtown area when he was in high school. His parents had found out a couple of times and had made his life hell. He weighed the options in his head, but then he smirked realizing he was an adult and there wasn't anything his parents could do to him that wouldn't make them look bad. He smirked. _"Sounds like a plan. Let's go."_

Jeice grinned at his old friend nearly pushing him out of the store chuckling when he received a heated glare. As they exited, the piano started playing, Botan having been at the ready. The beautiful lightness of the intro reflected that of a sunny day full of joy and freedom. As the intro played, Jeice grabbed Preston's shoulder and started guiding him down the street. Eventually, Jeice began singing, _"We keep heading in the same direction. You've become my own reflection. Is that your soul that you're trying to protect? I always hoped that we would intersect, yeah."_

Preston eyed Jeice as he basically admitted he had been following along the same career lines as he. His friend was always the one to encourage him going against his parents and the business world. But he was right in saying that Preston had become more like him as well, more combative, less compliant. _"You need time to cope and time to heal, time to cry if it's what you feel,"_ Jeice continued. _"Life can hurt when it gets too real. I can hold you up when it's hard to deal."_ His old friend offered to be his confidant, his voice of reason, who would help him figure out the way to balance out the two worlds, mainly by unwinding and getting oneself to a better place.

" _Alive, alive,"_ Preston interjected. _"Alive is all I wanna feel. Tonight, tonight, I need to be where you are. I need to be where you are."_

" _Hey you, look around!"_ The chorus came in, the dancers entering the stage as they synchronistically walked behind the two. _"Can you hear that noise? It's a rebel sound. We got nowhere else to go."_ They began waving their arms in a rounded circle heading up towards the sky, and then pulled their hands down to their gut during the next line. _"And when the sun goes down, and we fill the streets, you're gonna dance 'til the morning to the rebel's beat."_

 _"You can take everything from me,"_ Preston sang. _"'Cause this is all I need."_

" _You know that life is like a ticking clock,"_ one of the dancers sang their solo line.

Another added, _"Nobody knows when it's gonna stop, yeah."_

The third answered, _"Before I'm gone I need to touch someone with a word, with a kiss, with a decent song, yeah,"_ causing Preston to roll his eyes.

" _And it gets lonely when you live out loud,"_ Jeice warned his friend about their world of wealth and riches, _"when the truth that you seek isn't in this crowd. You better find your voice, better make it loud. We've gotta burn that fire or we'll just burn out."_

" _Alive, alive,"_ the background dances sang instead of Preston this time as they danced with different steps that looked like random strangers turning and engaging in conversation. _"Alive is all I wanna feel. Tonight, tonight, I need to be where you are. I need to be where you are."_

As the dancers sang the final chorus, running in place, was when there would need to be the transition to the club, and once Jeice and Preston stopped "walking" they would move right past them running into the club."

The actor playing Jeice turned to Hiei and was about to smile, but as the dancers from the last scene left and the new dancers entered, Hiei regarded 'Jeice' with a hard look. "Um, did I do something wrong?"

"No," Hiei assured him. "What's your name?"

"Victor," he offered, surprised his idol was asking his name. "Victor Feld."

Hiei nodded, but said nothing more. Besides him and Botan, Victor would have a lot of lines and despite his holding onto the script and reading it a couple of times, he already had the majority of the scene memorized. Interrupting Hiei's musings, the next set of dancers, four couples, began dancing to swing music that Kurama was playing from a recording. During that time, Hiei and Victor walked to the side of the stage allowing for the couples to be seen. It would appear to the audience that the two businessmen were watching the action, Jeice for entertainment, but Preston with a scowl on his face.

Hiei wondered if Botan would miss her cue for when the woman, his mother's character, 'Hope,' would show up. It was supposed to happen at the end of the swing song, and his eyes would meet her before the song he and Botan were currently working on would be played. It was the moment in the play where Preston would see the girl of his dreams and be paralyzed, Jeice snapping him out of it with a nudge before the dancefloor would become chaotic. Preston would eventually reach her, them sharing a dance.

That was how the scene would progress, what they would rehearse once the songs were written. For the rest of the week, Hiei intended to run lines with many of his costars, skipping the songs. To complete those, he would meet with Botan in private while she was already in the chorus room working on her own pieces. At least he had finally gotten the rehearsal underway. Despite it being his parents' history, Hiei escaped that world through acting, becoming that different person. Even if he hated the man, he would still do his character justice. In the beginning, he wasn't so bad, just misunderstood. That's how his mother had always conveyed the story, anyway.

As the jazzy song ended, the dancers freezing in their finishing poses, Botan entered the stage sheepishly. Hiei's breath was literally taken away by her timidity. He had not written much for his mother's character in that scene, just that she appeared and the character's eyes met. The way she looked, she acted the way their mother used to describe herself. She was shy, unsure of herself before she had dated his and Yukina's father. Her friends had forced her to join them that night after she had failed an entrance exam to a private college to which her mother had wanted her to apply. She had failed on purpose, not wanting to go to a prep school with the inheritance from her father. Instead, she wanted to escape the city, study music, but she could never stand up to her mother, not in the beginning.

Botan looked around as she stumbled onto the stage, accidentally bumping into one of the extras. Hiei's expression softened. He knew she wasn't acting, yet her clumsy movements were perfect for his mother's character. He was very amazed by her in that minute, but he shook it off. No, he was just surprised that the strong woman who defended his play had become nervous moments later.

She looked at him from her spot, and Hiei, for the first time in his life, had an out-of-body experience. It felt like time had stopped for the moment before he snapped himself out of it and dismissed everyone for the day tell them they had put in a decent effort. He left the stage as everyone started gathering their belongings and chattering with their friends. He went straight to the small table Kurama and Takedo had set themselves up at.

Kurama smirked knowingly at Hiei. "What's wrong?" he chimed. "You look a little pale."

Hiei scoffed. "I think I'm getting a little _too_ into character," he remarked. "It's nothing."

"Of course," the redhead responded, a grin on his face. "So, that's it for the first rehearsal. I think it was a good overview on what they'll have to expect from future rehearsals."

Takedo chuckled. "That pianist did a good job of putting the orchestra members in their place. Nice pick."

"Hn," Hiei grunted. "Let's get on with this. I need to know if it's possible to get what I envisioned."

The two men smiled and nodded as they began discussing future plans and set details. Meanwhile, Botan was thanking Ayame and gathering her things. When she walked out of the pit, the girl from the first scene was standing in front of her looking her up and down as if she were sizing her up. The blue-haired girl was waiting for the woman to ridicule and slander her. Instead, the woman smirked at her and actually said something nice.

"You know, I heard that everyone was pissed about who got casted as Hope, and now I know why," she remarked. "You're so pretty."

Botan blushed at the comment. "Um…thank you? Uh…"

"Brigitte," she introduced. "It's French." Botan laughed nervously. "So, I hear you're writing the music, too."

"Well, sort of," Botan replied. "Hiei and I are working together. I'm…not all that great with lyrics."

"You play well," Brigitte stated. "Listen, I have a favor to ask."

"A favor?"

"Yeah," the student answered with a nod. "You see, I have to write a little something for one of my classes, and I was wondering if you'd give it a listen and give me some advice."

Botan was floored. She had really expected this woman would be rude to her, but instead she was coming to her for advice. A smile formed on her face, and she finally realized that she truly was somewhere far away from her hometown. "Sure, I'd love to help you. If you have time, meet me in the choir room tomorrow at noon. I have about an hour of time to spare."

"Thanks a bunch," Brigitte chimed. "Have a good evening."

The other girl walked away convening with a few of her other friends who had been dancing to the swing number. Botan grinned, feeling very much at home in this theater scene, and that was something she never thought possible. She had fought really hard against Hiei's desires, but it all had worked out for the better. Feeling a surge of gratitude, she made her way over to Hiei. She needed to thank him for this. He had introduced her to a brand new environment and, despite her nerves, she loved it.

Botan made her way over to the table. Kurama noticed her first and then offered to go to the art room with Takedo to see what they had to work with. Moments later, Hiei and Botan were the last two in the auditorium, and the dark-haired actor turned to look at her.

She was smiling brightly, not forced like he normally saw, causing him to be curious. "Thank you for forcing me to do this," she said softly. "I didn't think I would enjoy it as much as I did. Um, sorry about being so out of it on stage. I just-"

"You don't have to apologize," Hiei cut her off. "It was perfect. I didn't know how to capture that moment, but you did well with it."

"Seriously?" Botan asked, unconvinced. "Well, okay then… So, are we still on for tomorrow at one?"

Hiei gave her a curt nod before he turned and walked away. Botan frowned at his retreating form. He hadn't really reacted too much of what she said, except about the play. She figured she really should cut him some slack. After all, this play was a big deal to him, and he was highly stressed. At least she could empathize with him. Maybe, as they spent more time together, he'd open up to her. She could only hope he would, or she'd most likely be drowned by his storm of emotions. She shook her head and left the auditorium herself. It was her turn to cook that night, after all, and she refused to put that on Yukina. Her grin returned as she made her way back to her apartment. For once in her life, she could say that it had been a really good day.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I do not know any of the songs I use, but I did buy the songs. Never forget to support the artist ;) Anyway, this will be the first chapter with a fully instrumental piece, so if you want the full effect, like I suggested last chapter, listen to the song when you go through the scene. I feel it will enhance the story, especially those instrumental pieces. The song I'll be using in here is "O Sacred Head Now Wounded" by Jim Brickman. He's an excellent pianist that my mother and I actually had the opportunity to see in concert recently. Most of the instrumentals are by this artist, for his music inspired some of my favorite scenes for this story. Also, I don't own "And We Danced" by The Hooters.

Thank you to those who reviewed last chapter. I'm really glad that you are enjoying the story. Again, sorry it's taken me so long to get updated. I feel that once the story picks up, it'll be much easier. I have many scenes planned for the later chapters, but it seems like this story hasn't picked up a life of its own in the beginning. Still, I hope you enjoy this! Thanks for reading!

* * *

Botan sat at the piano, slurping up the last remaining noodles of her lunch. The day following the first rehearsal, she knew she'd be busy. She had an exam that morning for one of her basic studies courses, a nice and easy one, thankfully. She had been so caught up with the play and songwriting that she hadn't had much time to study.

True to her word, she met with Brigitte at noon and let the girl play her song while she critiqued it and offered her advice. Brigitte was actually very thankful and invited Botan to a party her dorm was having that weekend. Botan hesitated, giving the girl a noncommittal answer. Her brother had told her of the couple college parties he went to, and he always regretted them. Botan didn't think she belonged in that kind of situation.

By the time Brigitte left, she had about a half hour to eat her lunch before Hiei would show up. She basically planned to hide out in the chorus room all day until she was kicked out in the evening for class. In the meantime, she was taking another glance at the script. The next day, she and Hiei would be rehearsing the scene where Preston and Hope would meet, interacting for the first time, and then they would dance to some old eighties song. Botan loved eighties music, but she and Hiei had not been able to find a song that would fit the feel of the play. Hiei had been surprised that Botan rejected every song he did. Her ear and her understanding towards his vision impressed Hiei immensely. He _hated_ working with others and only put up with those he somewhat trusted. This woman who seemed like nothing when he met her managed to earn his trust in the weirdest ways and he found he worked well with her, just as well as he did with his own best friend.

Of course, Botan wasn't privy to Hiei's thoughts, and so she kept many of her opinions to herself unless Hiei pried them out of her. He had yet to get her to realize that he actually needed her feedback. After all, they needed to make sure they meshed well on every scene. Hiei knew she hadn't gotten far in the script. She was incredibly busy preparing for her own opportunities, and she had less time. According to Yukina, she needed to submit a CD by the end of the semester to her advisor to get approval on what songs she could play during her portion of the recital that would be held a month before his play would air. Where her problems were not his, she mad his problems hers, so he offered leniency. She was the only one he would harass about memorizing her lines immediately. This was her first time acting after all.

He found her in the chorus room at the piano with an empty lunch container sitting on top. Botan was completely unware of his presence playing a beautiful melody he hadn't heard in a while. It was some church song, _O Sacred Head Now Wounded_. He remembered hearing it only a handful of times in his life when his mother brought himself and Yukina to church. Despite his negative, dark disposition, Hiei never minded church. He didn't know if he believed in anything, but his mother had. It was a part of her, and so he learned the prayers and knew the majority of the readings. Of course, he was young when she died, and after he was separated from Yukina, he no longer worried about church or praying. Instead, he focused on survival and making something of himself, which was difficult to do for a child abandoned on the streets.

Hiei leaned against the wall by the door careful not to make a sound. He had never heard Botan play something like this. Well, that wasn't fully true. He clearly heard her, or else he'd have never brought her on as his collaborative songwriter, and he heard her play the first songs at rehearsal. Still, seeing her was different. When they worked together to write songs, she was careful, precise, and guarded. Watching her now as she moved while she played was different, slightly intoxicating. It was always amazing to see someone, anyone, get lost in their mind and work this way. Nothing else mattered, though if Hiei interrupted, she'd become guarded again like the time he had first heard her singing. It was this freedom she possessed that drew him to her for his own play.

The way she played the song was like nothing he had heard. It was deep, low with a sort of sincere heaviness to the song becoming lighter as she reached the second verse. It sounded both passionate and mournful yielding to sad celebration. Given the context of the song, she had seemed to capture every emotion that could be felt. Hearing it had awoken a feeling in Hiei that he had long kept buried since his mother had passed away. His impassive gaze softened as he continued to watch Botan, trying to ignore the feeling of longing he felt for those good times he remembered with his mother. It surprised him how difficult it was to hear the music, but he remained quiet until Botan's rendition tapered off into silence.

As Botan took her hands off the keys, she breathed a sigh of relief before reaching for her tape recorder and stopped it. She hadn't really been planning on working on something besides her main piece for her portfolio, but when she still couldn't come up with a good way to end that one, she started adlibbing and found part of a familiar melody. As soon as she heard it, she began to focus on that song. Since then, she had been working on her own rendition of the song. Of course, whenever she played she got really into the music, closing her eyes and letting herself feel it rather than looking at the keys.

Because of this, she hadn't realized anyone had been watching her, not until she picked up her tape recorder and turned around on the seat. She froze, eyes wide, as hers met his. His expression had her stunned speechless. He looked distant, yet his eyes held a sense of warmth that she had not once seen from him. Almost immediately after their eyes met, Hiei became guarded once again and uncrossed his arms walking up to her. "Let's get to work," he stated simply.

Botan was surprised by the harshness of his voice, wondering what had caused him to be irritable. For a moment, it seemed like he was fine. She was starting to learn to read his behavior and only some of his emotions. Hiei had seemed so relaxed seconds ago, and now he was acting in the crass matter he had when he had stopped by hers and Yukina's apartment. "U-Uh…" she stammered. "Okay. Just, one thing." He looked at her, eyes narrowed and demanding she continue. "Um, what did you think of the song? I mean, I assume you heard some of it. Did it sound okay?"

Hiei's eyes widened ever so slight, but his irritated glare remained fixated on Botan. How could she even ask that? Of course the song sounded okay. Did she not know how amazing it had sounded? For it to have brought him back to a time he normally avoided, it was extraordinary. He wouldn't admit it. "Hn," he scoffed. "What does my opinion matter? It has nothing to do with me."

"Well, that's true," Botan timidly offered. Hiei nearly rolled his eyes at her normal shyness. Sure, Botan felt that way over the play and acting, but she had never acted that way with him. Hiei did not deal with shy people. "It's just…well, your opinion actually means something to me." That was not what Hiei was expecting to hear. "I just wanted to know if you thought there was anything I needed to work on, improve, or change. Like your show is important to you, my recital is important to me, and I really can't trust anyone else to be brutally honest with me except for you, so…"

"You don't need to change anything," Hiei interrupted her, silencing her. "It was decent."

Those words alone brought an unbridled grin to the woman's face. It took him by surprise, that pure joy that he had apparently caused by giving her his opinion like she asked. "Thank you," Botan replied. "That means I can transpose it later."

"Hm?"

Botan blushed and looked away, attempting to explain her process to Hiei. "Well, I need to submit sheet music to my advisor when the time comes."

"I thought Yukina said you needed to submit a CD," Hiei interjected, eyes narrowed again. "Why the sheet music?"

"It's just the process," Botan explained. "The CD is so that my advisor can hear how it sounds, but the sheet music needs to be reviewed. Anyway, it takes too much time to go between writing a song and writing sheet music. I rarely write any of my songs down. I usually just recorded them when I could or play from memory. So basically, I just play what I feel and record it. I can always write the sheet music later. It's much easier once a song is completed."

Hiei nodded, though he still believed it to be a lot of work. He understood, considering they needed to do that for their own collaboration. In fact, he saw Botan switch the tape in the recorder to the one they had been using during their sessions. "I didn't know if we were going to be writing much more today, but I figure just in case. Anyway, I know our biggest issue is choosing a song we can dance to. Have you had any luck envisioning the scene?"

"No," Hiei remarked. To be honest, he had been struggling. He had never felt what his parents had supposedly felt, and there weren't too many eighties songs he'd dance to with someone at a club. Sure, he needed to get into "Preston's" mindset, but that was difficult in it of itself. "You?"

"I'm afraid not," Botan admitted with a sigh. "I've never really been to a dance, not since middle school. After that, it just wasn't…something I was interested in." Her eyes shifted back to Hiei to find him staring at her before she blushed and awkwardly laughed and waved him off. "But you didn't need to know that, after all. I just mean, I don't have experience knowing what songs would make for good dance songs."

There was nothing Hiei could come up with either, so he figured he'd keep the dialogue going. Eventually, they'd have to come up with something. "Why didn't you go to your school dances?"

Botan hesitated. She had already given him the safe answer, but the truth would end up digging into her personal life. In her mind, she had already resolved to have a completely professional relationship with Hiei. He seemed the type to want to keep his personal matters and business matters separate, even if they crossed slightly due to the play's content. "Oh, you don't want to know about little old me," she dissuaded. "Besides, it really doesn't matter. What matters is getting everything up and running for your show. So, let's put on our thinking caps, shall we?"

Hiei was undeterred. He could tell she was avoiding the question, and he really didn't think it was a big deal. Besides, they were costars and collaborators. They were already spending a great deal of their time together, and it would only increase from there. Eventually, they'd need to run through the lines for their scenes in private, many times. Getting to know his costar was always on top of Hiei's list even if he couldn't stand them. It was important to generate some kind of attachment to the character the other played, and it was much easier when two people knew at least a little about the other.

"Contrary to what you think," Hiei stated, "getting to know each other is an important part of this. Haven't you thought about the _future_ of the play? Right now, the music and the dancing is one thing, but eventually we're going to have to fully become the characters. It's a romance, Botan. There will be a lot of activity, many touches, and so we at least should learn a little about each other. I'm aware you aren't an actress, and so those scenes will be a bit difficult for you to stomach. It's better going into it when the other person is not a stranger."

Botan was surprised by Hiei's declaration. As he had observed, she had only been thinking of the beginnings and not the direction the play would be taking. She blushed the instant she thought of being embraced by him. Her heart started to race as she grimaced and stood up walking away from him and wrapping her arms around herself. She didn't notice the confused glance Hiei was shooting her way. "I actually hadn't thought about that," Botan murmured. "Sorry. I know all of that is important. Just…it never occurred to me at all. I already feel like I know a lot about you from just simply observing you, from what Yukina's said, and from this play. It's like you're baring your soul in your words, so I didn't want to pry much."

"I won't tell you anything I don't feel comfortable with telling you," Hiei countered. "And I expect you to be aware that you have the same right. Some things are better left unsaid. We don't have to know each other's 'deepest, darkest secrets,' as one of my other costars put it before I put her in her place. I'm not giving you anything that can be used against me."

"I wouldn't use anything you told me against you," Botan stated sincerely earning hardened eyes. "Uh, I…just to make sure you understand. I'll be honest, I know you probably like keeping your thespian life separate from real life, but well, I kind of…sort of…oh never mind."

Hiei huffed, getting irritated with Botan's constant dodging. "What?" he grunted out, glaring at the blue-haired woman.

"I…" Botan tried again before taking a deep breath. "I want to be your friend."

This woman certainly had no qualms throwing Hiei for a loop. His enlarged, red eyes bore into hers, shock evident on his face before he sneered slightly. "Friend?" he questioned, his voice full of contempt. "You never cease to amaze me. What reason would you possibly have for wanting to befriend me?"

Botan's eyes filled with hurt, hearing the accusation. She frowned and felt like the smallest person in the world. "Well, I know what you're thinking, and it has nothing to do with the show or even your status," she tried to placate. "Hiei, none of that stuff matters to me. I'll admit I've heard of you, and I always had the utmost respect for you, but to me…you're not Hiei Jaganshi, the actor or playwright. You're just plain Hiei, my friend's brother and a fellow actor and songwriter. I'm not looking for anything in return. I just thought it would be nice to have another friend. I don't have very many of those."

Hiei's eyes searched hers and could tell she was being truthful. In all fairness, she really misunderstood why he was being so dismissive. Hiei had very few friends. His life on the streets were still ever engraved in his memories, and he wasn't willing to let any more people than he already had into his mind. The idea that some random, small town girl actually wanted to be more than colleagues, _friends_ , left him feeling disgusted by the idea. "I'm not looking for a friend," he admitted. He saw her expression falter and the light in her eyes fade. Still, he needed to be perfectly clear. "Getting to know each other doesn't mean we will be friends. It will just help our chemistry and interactions will seem more natural. That's all. As I said, this is all strictly business."

"Oh," Botan replied, her voice low. "I see." He could tell that it wasn't what she wanted to hear. For a moment, he heard her voice crack and could see her form shaking. His brow raised slightly in uncertainty. She wasn't about to cry, was she? He remained quiet while she sniffed once and then looked up at him with a forced smile. "I guess you're right. You really are focused on this play, and even if you don't want to be friends, I can't still do whatever I can to support you in this endeavor. Maybe we can revisit that point when you're less stressed. For now…well, to answer your earlier question, I didn't go to many dances after middle school because the friends I usually went with…well, I had a falling out with both of them at one point, and to this day one still isn't thrilled with me. I didn't want to go because it would be awkward. Besides, I never had anyone to go with, anyway. I don't feel like I missed out on anything, though. I mean, I kind of wish I went to prom, but it's not like I would have had those moments others have. My sister wouldn't have helped me with that."

"What about your mother?" Hiei asked casually before Botan got unusually quiet.

It wasn't Hiei's fault that he accidentally pushed a couple of her buttons, but she was already overwhelmed, especially since Hiei said he wasn't interested in being her friend. That had brought back a few painful memories. "She couldn't. I…I need to go, I think. I've been in this room too long today. We can meet back here tomorrow around the same time. I'll try to figure out a song by then. Uh, you can text Yukina and let her know if you come up with one."

Before Hiei could respond or even ask Botan about her abrupt change in demeanor, she was already out the door. Her behavior was indeed strange, and it puzzled him. He could absolutely not figure this woman out, and that was something he was unused to. Usually his costars were like open books, all the same, but Botan was unlike all of them, the reason he had chosen her. Still, he didn't like her reaction. He was never deceitful. He made it clear from the beginning that this was a business arrangement. There was nothing that could have prepared him for the fact that the woman wanted to be friends, nor could it prepare him for the way she conducted herself when he asked about her mother.

As he listened to her reasoning, he thought it stupid that Botan would ostracize herself because of a couple of disgruntled classmates. There was simply no reason to feed into that kind of behavior. Hiei himself hadn't gone to school dances save the prom, and that was only because Yukina had been asked there by a guy. Yukina never went to any dances either, for she was always focused on studying and spending as much time with her older brother as possible, but she agreed to go with that guy, Touya he believed was his name. Hiei only went to protect his sister, but he had little interest. If Botan had wanted to go, she should have just gone. Sparrowfield girls certainly were strange.

He looked around the room and realized that Botan had forgotten her tape recorder and sighed. She'd be needing that. He'd text Yukina once he returned to his room letting her know he had it and to tell Botan he'd bring it the next day. At least his sister could act as the go-between for now.

* * *

Botan made it back to the apartment and went straight for her room. Thankfully, Yukina was already in for the night. Most likely, she had a paper to work on. Usually, by that time, the girl would already be working on dinner, and when she wasn't it was because she was engrossed. That was fine. Botan wasn't really in the mood to eat that night anyway.

Her sessions with Hiei usually made her feel better, but this one just left her feeling empty. She understood why Hiei was keeping his distance, but that didn't bother her. When she thought about Yusuke and Keiko, having lost one and almost lost both, she felt horrible. She didn't know what possessed her to bring up her desire to have gone to prom or even the fact that Shizuru wouldn't have gone with her anywhere to get ready. There was nothing magical about a school dance, nor would there have been in getting ready. No offense to her sister, but Botan would only go through that sort of thing with her mother. Shizuru was not her mother.

"I really miss you, mama," Botan spoke to the air, tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry I'm such a screw up."

As if someone knew she was being down on herself, her phone rang and she sighed moving to answer it. "Hello?"

" _Hey, Botan,"_ Yusuke greeted. _"I'm kind of bored, so I wanted to know if you wanted to do something tonight."_

Botan looked around her room noting that her bed looked very welcoming at the moment. She just wanted to crawl under the covers and hide from the rest of the world. "I'm not really feeling up to anything, Yusuke."

" _Are you okay?"_

Damn her friend and his ability to see right through her. "I've just been busy all day and I'm exhausted. I was just going to go to bed."

" _Botan…_ " Yusuke admonished. _"It's four o'clock in the afternoon. If you go to bed now, you're going to be up all night. Seriously, what's wrong?"_

"Nothing is wrong," Botan protested a little too much. "I just don't want to do anything."

" _I could just drive us around for a bit,"_ her friend suggested. _"I mean, we still have some exploring to do. What do you say?"_

Botan sighed in exasperation. She knew Yusuke wasn't going to let this go, so she nodded her head and said, "Fine. We can take my car. Want me to come pick you up?"

" _Nah, I'll walk over,"_ he told her. _"Like I said, I'm bored. I could use the exercise."_

"Yeah, yeah," Botan muttered jovially. "Alright, I'll see you in a bit."

" _Later."_

Botan hung up her phone and looked to the sky. "Well played," she stated not knowing if she was talking to her parents or God at the moment. Clearly, someone didn't want her sitting in her room wallowing for hours. Even if she was distressed, she could at least let Yusuke drive her around. Maybe it would make her feel better. Perhaps she'd even be able to figure out a song.

* * *

Yusuke showed up about a half hour later, and the two of them made their way to her car. Yusuke held his hand up so Botan could toss him the keys so they could get into the car. He pulled out of the parking lot, and the two of them began their journey together.

It was what Botan needed, senseless chatter as they pointed out new restaurants to try and new places to look into. They passed a bowling alley, a movie theater, a mall, an arcade, and even a drive-in. "Hey, it's been a while since we checked one of those out," Yusuke stated. "Wanna catch a movie?"

"Not tonight," Botan sighed as she rested her elbow on the window and held her head up.

Yusuke looked to his friend, concerned. "Okay, Botan, spill," he ordered. "What happened today that has you feeling so down?"

"Nothing," Botan lied. "Like I said, I'm just tired."

"Come on, Botan," Yusuke huffed. "I know you. This isn't just 'tired.' You're upset. Just let me help you."

"Yusuke, I'm fine," Botan argued, getting a little loud. "It's really nothing major. If it was, I'd tell you. You have no reason to worry over me."

Yusuke sighed and shook his head. "Botan, I always worry about you. You're my best friend and you know I love you. I just worry when you get closed off like this. Haven't I proven over the years that you can trust me?"

Botan didn't answer. Yusuke had proven himself to her and won back her trust, but there was still a lot she couldn't discuss with him. Plus, when it came to her parents, she felt she should be over it. It had been ten years and she needed to get over it. She could hardly remember her parents, though she remembered their love. If anything, she should be happy that she had all those good memories of them. Some people didn't even have that.

The silence was stifling, and Yusuke was about to plead his case again when his phone went off. "Damn it," he cursed when he heard the familiar ringtone. He took one of his hands from the wheel and pulled out his phone. "It's Keiko…"

"Don't worry," Botan assured him, her voice unusually steady and her eyes devoid of emotion. "It's fine. I'll be quiet."

Yusuke felt guilty when Botan said that and sighed. Not much could be done about this right now. He had to answer the call. "Hey, Keiko. What's up?"

" _Yusuke, you'll never believe it!"_ the girl said in complete excitement. _"I just found Marilyn got engaged to Bradley yesterday night. Can you believe it? They were the couple everyone expected to get together besides us."_

"Uh-huh," Yusuke muttered, not really caring about their old classmates. "Well, that's good for them."

" _I know,"_ Keiko sighed. _"Do you ever think that will be us?"_

Yusuke nearly slammed on the breaks that moment having been completely stunned. "Keiko," he said in warning. "You know we probably will. I just didn't think we were thinking about that until we both finished school."

" _Oh, of course,"_ Keiko agreed. _"I just wanted to know what you thought."_

"I love you," Yusuke told her. "That's what I think. Other than that, I haven't thought of much." Yusuke looked over to Botan and frowned when he saw her eyes fixated on the dashboard. "Listen, Keiko. I need to go. I'm actually kind of driving right now, taking a look at the town."

" _Yusuke!"_ Keiko shouted in a panic. _"You know I worry when you answer while driving."_

Yusuke snickered. "You worry when my phone goes to voicemail, too," he teased before sighing. "Look, Keiko, I'm fine. I'm not going anywhere. I'll text you when I get back to my dorm later."

" _Alright, Yusuke,"_ Keiko said softly. _"I love you."_ Botan could genuinely believe that from the sound of her voice. _"Drive safely, please."_

"I will. Love you too."

With that, Yusuke grabbed his phone and ended the call. "Sorry about that," he offered Botan. "I figured she wouldn't call. We already talked earlier."

"It's fine," Botan stated curtly.

Yusuke almost glared at her. "Botan, it's clearly not fine. You look pissed. What the hell did I do now?"

"Nothing!" Botan argued. "You didn't do anything, Yusuke. It's fine. I'm fine. Just drop it."

"Son of a…" Yusuke muttered under his breath. "Damn it, Botan. You're making me mad. Just tell me what the hell I did that pissed you off. Whatever I did, I'm sorry. Is it because Keiko called?"

"No, Yusuke," Botan scoffed. "You seriously don't know me if you think that bothered me."

"Then what the fuck did?"

Botan glared at Yusuke looking angrier than I had seen her in a while. "How about the fact that Keiko still hates me? What about the fact that she calls you multiple times a day and panics when she doesn't hear from you because she doesn't trust that you won't leave her because of _me_? Or, here's my favorite…the fact that I can _never_ see my best friend get married because his future wife hates my guts? Just, drop it, okay? I don't want to talk about it."

"Botan," Yusuke breathed out. "Keiko doesn't hate you." Botan made a disbelieving noise. "Okay, maybe she does, but that doesn't matter. As for her trust issues, those are her problem. I can deal with it. They're my fault, not yours, so get that through your head. As for me getting married, you honestly think I wouldn't invite you to my wedding. Your my best friend, damn it. The only friend I've got besides Keiko. You'd be my best woman."

"I wouldn't," Botan retorted making Yusuke falter. "I'm not getting between you and Keiko again. It will be her wedding day, and I'm not going to ruin it by being there. Yusuke, just drop me off. I'll walk back to the apartment. Just leave the car and give Yukina the keys."

"Damn it, Botan, no!" Yusuke snapped before rubbing the back of his head aggressively. "That's not how this works. You're upset. I'm not just abandoning you here. Let's go find a nice park. We always loved those. We can just sit and talk, okay?"

"There's nothing to talk about, Yusuke," Botan said quieter this time as tears pricked the corner of her eyes.

"Could've fooled me," Yusuke retorted before sighing. "Please, Botan, for me? I can't forgive myself when you're this worked up."

Botan snickered slightly. "I know," she murmured. "You're too much of a softy. Just, Yusuke, I really don't want to talk about anything."

"Fine, we won't talk then," Yusuke pled. "Just, come sit with me in the park. Sometimes silence is the best medicine, right?"

"Yeah," Botan mustered, her voice weak and quiet. "Alright, let's go find a park."

Yusuke mentally sighed in relief. He really hadn't expected Botan to get so upset, nor did he expect her to get worked up about his and Keiko's future wedding. That was so far into the future that Yusuke wasn't even worried. He always assumed that either Keiko would get over it by then or he'd just tell her that Botan and his mother were the only ones he wanted there and she'd have to deal with it. Eventually, Keiko was going to have to grow up and trust him. She knew he loved her, and he knew she loved him. He never worried about her going to anyone else. He just wished she'd give him the same courtesy.

His eyes wandered to his saddened friend who was once again staring out the window. He really wished Keiko would cut Botan some slack, too. He had tried to explain to his girlfriend multiple times that Botan had had nothing to do with anything, but Keiko never listened once Botan's name got brought up. Someday, she'd have to listen.

Yusuke wasn't going to abandon Botan. As he said, she was his best friend and he cared so much about her. He had a very small circle. The only people who ever gave a damn about him were her, her brother, his mother, and Keiko. Now, Kuwabara wasn't his biggest fan and their friendship was nonexistent. The older male made that clear ever since they became roommates. Keiko was his distrustful girlfriend, and his mother spent most nights wasting herself. Botan was the only one who was truly there to help him talk through all that crap.

Botan had it worse. She had him, Kuwabara, and her little sister, Hinageshi. Now, she at least had Yukina which made Yusuke feel better. And Kurama seemed to like Botan. There was also Hiei. Speaking of…

"Oh, I almost forgot," Yusuke stated reaching into his bag in the backseat.

"Yusuke!" Botan shouted, grabbing the wheel from the passenger's seat as Yusuke snickered and handed her the tape recorder.

"Sorry, but I would have forgotten again," he explained, thinking that was an okay answer. "You left this behind at the chorus room. Hiei brought it back with him and told me to give it to you when I said I was going to see you. Why didn't you tell us you were helping him with his show? That's pretty amazing, though I didn't peg you for an actor."

"It never came up," Botan offered, placing a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "It's not that big a deal."

"Sounds like a pretty big deal to me," Yusuke said sincerely, frowning at how withdrawn Botan was acting. "Botan, I'm being serious. Is there something bothering you? You usually tell me this stuff, and you never act so…darty."

"Darty?" Botan questioned. "Is that an actual world?"

"I don't know…flighty, then," Yusuke corrected. "Avoiding your issues. You always tell me not to do that. Why are you?"

"Yusuke," Botan murmured. "I'm not avoiding anything. I just don't want to talk about it. It's just the same old stuff, one of those days. I'll be fine. If I weren't, I would tell you, okay?"

Yusuke finally surrendered, sighing. "Well, alright, then. I'm holding you too that. Now, let's go find that park. Hey, why not turn on the radio? We should get some tunes in here."

"Sure," Botan agreed, moving to tap the power. It was left on a classical station, one that Yusuke said would make him pass out at the wheel from sheer boredom, so she quickly flipped to one of their favorite, pre-programmed channels, an eighties rock station.

" _And that was 'Rock You Like A Hurricane' by the Scorpions,"_ a masculine voice announced. _"Next up is an old favorite from The Hooters, 'And We Danced.' Let's get rolling!"_

Immediately, the music started, the harmonica and ukulele making way for the guitars, drums, and piano before the first lyrics rang out, _"She was a be-bop baby on a hard day's night. She was_ _hangin' on Johnny. He was holdin' on tight. I could feel her coming from a mile away. There was no use talking, there was nothing to say when the band began to play and play._

 _"And we danced like a wave on the ocean, romanced. We were liars in love and we danced._ _Swept away for a moment by chance. And we danced and danced, danced."_

Botan froze when she heard the song. It was one she knew well, one that both of her parents had loved. She had long pushed it to the back of her mind because it reminded her of both of them. That was hard after they passed away. It was the song they danced to on their first date. They had known each other, but hadn't gotten together until they were out of college.

It didn't surprise Botan that the song hadn't come to her right away, but now that she was hearing it, her mouth dropped open. It was the perfect song for the play, no matter how painful it might be for her. It was catchy. It was lively. It was perfect. She had actually found it.

Yusuke was humming to it, tapping on the wheel before he remembered why Botan didn't like the song. He gasped and reached to shut it off. "I'm so sorry, Botan. I-"

"No!" Botan stopped him, surprising him. She smiled at his perplexed face. "Let it play. I need to hear this."

* * *

Hiei tossed his bag on an empty chair in the chorus room incredibly pissed off. Last night had been a nightmare. He had returned to his dorm to find Yusuke trying to engage Kuwabara to play a videogame, but the redhead would not have it sort of upsetting the dark-haired teenager. Eventually, Yusuke gave up, getting bored with his game and texted Botan asking the woman to hang out. Of course, the jealous redhead scolded him saying he couldn't use Botan for his own personal amusement. Yusuke had argued that it wasn't like that and that he and Botan were friends. Besides, he had appealed to Kuwabara first. Kuwabara merely rolled his eyes and said he'd hunt them down if Yusuke didn't get back at a decent time to which the younger male simply laughed and got ready to run.

Hiei had given him the tape recorder to give the woman since he had yet to hear from his sister on whether or not Botan knew. Yusuke had been stunned that Hiei had it, and the Kuwabara demanded to know when Hiei had even seen Botan. Hiei was getting irritated by the older male's constant insinuations. If he liked the girl, he should just tell her and then let that be the end of it. To prevent an argument from ensuing after Hiei remained silent, Kurama spoke up which pissed the thespian off. He didn't want to reward Kuwabara's immature behavior.

Kurama was the one to explain that Botan was Hiei's costar in his play and that she was helping him to come up with the music for the play. Both Yusuke and Kuwabara had been surprised, but Yusuke thought it was the greatest thing. He promised to return Botan's recorder to her knowing she would flip out when she went to get it and found it missing. Hiei was still getting dirty looks from Kuwabara as of this morning. It was absolutely infuriating.

So was the fact that Botan was late.

So far, in their partnership, Botan had never been late once, so he figured he could let it slide. Eventually, Botan ran into the room completely out of breath huffing and puffing as she nearly fell over. Hiei looked at her with a deadpanned expression. "S-Sorry I'm late," she apologized. "B-But I found it."

"Found what?" Hiei dared to ask.

Botan then took out her phone and played a video. Hiei's eyes widened when he heard it. "I found the song. Isn't it great?"

" _I met my be-bop baby at the Union Hall. She could dance all night and shake the paint off the walls. But when I saw her smile across a crowded room…well I knew we'd have to leave the party soon as the band began to play out of tune."_

Hiei knew this song! He couldn't remember where he heard it, but it really was the kind of song he'd been searching for. The scene after Preston would see Hope, he would struggle to get across the dancefloor to the woman, eventually being inches away as a new song began, asking her to dance. The other couples would fade into the background as the spotlight landed on the two of them gliding around the dancefloor. The two would be lost in each other's eyes, not registering anyone else in the room. It would just be them, and that song was the perfect song to highlight that.

Botan was shocked when Hiei came over to her, grabbing her hand and hip. She yelped, surprised by his touch, and looked at him questioningly. He only smirked at her. "Let's rehearse a little before the rehearsal later."

"Now?" Botan asked, flabbergasted.

Hiei chuckled. "Yes, now," he responded smoothly. "Get used to it, Botan. We're the leads. We'll be spending a lot of time together outside of rehearsal running through lines and practicing these dances. Let's try this one, now."

"O-Okay," Botan nervously stammered, letting Hiei glide her around the room, the chorus of the song playing once again.

* * *

" _And we danced like a wave on the ocean, romanced. We were liars in love and we danced._ _Swept away for a moment by chance. And we danced and danced, danced."_

Kurama was impressed, as were most of the other students, as they watched the first rehearsal of the scene where Preston met Hope. Both Botan and Hiei were smiling looking like they only had eyes for each other. The redhead knew they were acting, but there was something there. He had seen the chemistry when Hiei forced Botan to audition, but this was completely different. Hiei actually looked like he was having fun. Even in his past roles, Hiei never looked like he was having _this_ much fun.

" _The endless beat she's walking my way. Hear the music fade when she says, 'Are we getting too close, do we dare to get closer?' The room is spinning as she whispers my name._

" _And we danced like a wave on the ocean, romanced. We were liars in love and we danced._ _Swept away for a moment by chance. And we danced and danced, danced, danced."_

The two froze in place, Hiei dipping Botan before slowly returning her to the proper footing, the two breathing heavily as they smiled. _"Amazing,"_ 'Hope' breathed out, still trying to catch her breath.

'Preston' smirked arrogantly at the woman before leading her safely off the dancefloor. _"Thank you,"_ he remarked. _"You were pretty impressive yourself, though you look like you're about to drop, miss."_

Preston waved down the waiter, the man bringing them a couple glasses of water and setting them on the table. _"Hope,"_ Botan stated, keeping the script beside her.

" _Pardon?"_ Hiei replied right on cue.

Botan merely smiled. _"My name is Hope. And you are…?"_

" _Preston,"_ he replied. _"Hope. Such a beautiful name."_

" _My father, he named me,"_ Hope explained, smiling sadly.

" _Are you all right?"_ Preston asked, feeling concern for the woman he had just met.

Botan nodded, looking down at the script following the words with her finger. _"I am. It's just…my father passed away not too long ago."_

Preston was instantly sympathetic, taking the woman's hand and squeezing it. Botan had read the line, feeling overwhelmed seeing as she lost her own father. She could definitely related to Hope, or rather Hiei's mother. She had felt so emotionally overwhelmed that when Hiei grabbed her hand, she jumped, startled and looked to him questioningly. Hiei's eyes were soft, and for the moment she couldn't tell if he was acting or truly concerned about her. Did he think she had been acting? _"I'm truly sorry,"_ he offered the woman.

Botan shook her head, as per the script. _"No, don't be,"_ she argued. _"It's no one's fault. It's just…it's been tough. My mother hasn't been the same since he passed. To be honest, she's been focusing more on my future, and it's been suffocating."_

" _Tch,"_ Preston scoffed pulling away from Hope. _"I can relate. Not to the death, but controlling parents. For you, I'm sure it's just a phase."_ Hope looked upset when he said that. _"Or…isn't it…"_

" _No,"_ Hope refuted. _"My mother has always been controlling, but my father always acted as the mediator. With him gone…well…would you listen to me…"_ Hope forced a laugh, wiping away tears, which Hiei was surprised were real. Botan was actually crying… _"My friends would be smacking me upside the head right now for talking about it,"_ she continued with her lines. _"This was the first night they were able to get me out of the house."_

Preston's expression softened. _"It's fine,"_ he assured her. _"You can't hide this stuff. It's not as simple as all that. If you need to talk, go ahead. I won't stop you."_

Hope smiled and nodded. _"Thank you for understanding,"_ she said quietly. _"So, what about you?"_

" _What about me?"_

Hope giggled. _"What's your story, silly? You just said you understand controlling parents, so…"_

" _I'd rather not discuss it,"_ Preston growled, looking away before clutching his glass of water hard.

" _But…maybe it will help,"_ Hope countered, frowning. _"You just look…very intense. You let me speak of my father and mother. I promise I won't tell anyone."_

" _That's not what I'm worried about,"_ Preston murmured before sighing. _"Fine. Jeice would be telling me to hook a woman, so I guess I could start with this."_ Hope didn't seem too bothered by his remarked, causing him to chuckle before he glared at the candle between them. _"My father is the president of a major corporation, and as per an agreement with one of his business partners, I was supposed to marry his daughter."_ Hope's smile instantly fell. _"Don't worry…I'm not cheating. We're no longer together."_

" _I'm sorry,"_ Hope offered. _"What happened?"_

Preston scoffed before holding the glass and resting it on the palm of his hand as he leaned back in the chair. _"You mean what happened before or after I found out she was cheating on me?"_

Hope gasped, her hand covering her mouth, her eyes saddening. _"That's horrible! Are you okay?"_

" _Fine,"_ Preston remarked, sitting up. _"Our break up was a long time coming. I didn't love her. The cheating just pushed me over the edge. Marrying her would have been the ultimate humiliation. My parents aren't thrilled that I ended our engagement."_

" _But…don't they know-"_

" _Yup."_

" _But they don't…"_

" _No."_

" _But…but that's not fair!"_ Hope exclaimed.

Preston shrugged. _"That's my parents for you. But I'm not their lapdog. I don't answer to them. I may work for my father, but he can't write my life for me."_

Hope grinned, her eyes shining with belief in Preston. _"You're a very strong man,"_ she stated. _"For that, you should be proud."_ Hope then hugged herself. _"I only wish I could stand up to my mother the way you do your father."_

" _Who's to say you can't?"_ Preston questioned. At Hope's disbelieving look, he said, _"No, seriously. What can she do to you? Tell me, what is your dream?"_

" _Oh, seriously?"_ Hope teased making Preston smirk. _"Well, seriously, I want to study music. My mother never supported it, but my father paid for me to have piano lessons ever since I was a little girl. He always encouraged me. But, I can't afford to go into music. My mother is holding my college fund ransom unless I attend business school. I can't be like her or my father. I mean, she isn't a businesswoman, but she could be if she wanted to be."_

" _You can do anything you put your mind into,"_ Preston told her. _"I'm sure you'll find a way. You seem like a smart, devious woman."_

Hope laughed, covering her mouth and looking so jovial. _"You don't even know me, Preston,"_ she returned. _"You might think that, but I'm actually…uh…well…"_

As she grew nervous and blushed, Preston knew what she was getting to and grinned. This woman was just too endearing, not to mention she was drop dead gorgeous. _"Yo, Preston! We gotta go!"_

Preston froze and then sneered, glancing off to his side. He wasn't ready to leave the woman, yet. He released a heavy sigh, though, realizing his father was going to be pissed when he returned home. He wasn't ready for that, yet. His eyes landed on Hope's concerned orbs. _"Can I see you again?"_

Hope seemed surprised by the abrupt question, but she got over her shock, smiled, and nodded. _"I would like that."_

Preston took out a phone and allowed Hope to program her number. When she finished, handing the phone back, cradling it in her two hands, Preston covered her hands with his and stared into her eyes intensely, taking her breath away. _"It was incredibly nice to meet you. I'll be in touch, Hope."_

The woman smiled and released the phone. _"I'll be waiting. Take care, Preston."_

Preston stood up, disappearing into the crowd leaving Hope, Botan, all alone at the table as the couples began to leave the stage. Botan instantly felt her heart race, not having expected to be the last on stage. She looked to her last line of the scene, and sighed as it said for an action. _"Happy Birthday to me…"_

"Cut."

Botan snapped up, seeing Hiei on the ground below her with his arms crossed, observing her before he nodded. "Excellent work," he said, looking at the stage floor. "I think we've covered enough today."

Relieved, Botan got up from the chair and sat down to slip off the stage, her eyes and smile meeting Hiei's calculating expression. "Everyone may leave," Hiei stated. "Except you."

"Me?" Botan asked. "Did I do something wrong?"

"Yeah!" Koto called out before Hiei could respond. "You've been reading out of the script nonstop. What's your problem?"

Hiei looked over to Kurama angrily. "What the hell is she doing here?" he demanded.

"Well," Kurama offered, sweat-dropping, "she is the understudy."

Hiei growled before he left Botan for the moment walking directly up to the brunette. "It's the beginning of rehearsals, so Botan is permitted to use a script. It doesn't matter how people learn their roles as long as they learn. You are not to insert your two cents again, are we clear?" Koto was about to argue. "You're an understudy. Your opinion matters less than an ant's with me. If I have a problem with my costar, _I_ will address it, but as it stands I do not. You…you're on thin ice with me, woman. Don't cross me."

With that, Hiei returned to Botan leaving a fuming mad Koto to screech and storm out of the auditorium. Other performers looked to one another and then started to head out not wanting to be around Hiei Jaganshi while he was angry. Kurama grinned, leaving his station. He saw the concern in Hiei's eyes the moment he looked at Botan even when he looked completely neutral. He could tell something happened on the stage during that scene, but even he couldn't put his finger on it. It was best to let Hiei deal with her on his own.

Once Hiei and Botan were alone, she fidgeted nervously under his gaze. Hiei's eyes softened only slightly, his lips parting to ask his question. "I'm sorry," Botan interjected. "I'll get better with using the script."

"Botan, that's not what I have to discuss with you," Hiei assured. "You did fine today, better than I had expected. That first scene went almost perfectly. You'll learn your lines with time."

"Okay, then…" Botan replied, only a tiny bit less nervous. "Then…what did I do?"

"Why were you crying?"

Botan was caught off-guard and looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "I-I-I…" she stammered. "It's…I…it was part of the script!" she exclaimed trying to explain away what happened. "Hope wipes a tear from her eye."

"Botan, you aren't an actress, as you remind me from time to time," Hiei stated. "I highly doubt you can cry on cue. Tell me why you were crying."

"Hiei…" Botan chided. "It's nothing. Please, just…"

Botan began to turn away, but Hiei stopped her, grabbing her wrist lightly effectively stopping her. "This is important, Botan," he told her. "You're my costar. I need to know what's going to upset you. I need to know if something I did caused you to react that way while we were rehearsing or if there was something else going on in your day that affected you so much."

"It wasn't anything from today, nor was it anything you did," Botan sighed before she shook her head. "Hiei, please…I can't. It's too hard…"

"Botan," Hiei grunted irritably. "Come on…let's sit."

"No," Botan argued, angering her costar further. "H-Hiei…listen. This is something big, and it shouldn't affect me or you during this. It's something I need to deal with. I don't want to put it on you when you've got so much on your plate. I know we aren't friends, so you really don't need to worry about it. I'm fine, really."

Hiei released a heavy sigh and realized that he words from the other day were still being carried by the woman. "Just. Sit. Down." He ordered as he sat, Botan following suit. "I may have been a bit hasty in what I said," he explained. "I am not one to make friends. I've never had many real ones, only Kurama. It's hard, given my past, to trust anyone let alone want someone to trust me. It's not something I'm used to, and therefore I have no desire to make a friend. That doesn't mean I hate you or that you need to keep shit bottled up. As you saw in that scene…even Preston wouldn't let Hope keep everything hidden just because he was a stranger, so just talk to me. Whatever it is, I will try to accommodate you. That is what we need to do as costars. We're partners, Botan."

"You're…using my name a lot today," Botan pointed out. "Are you really that worried?"

Hiei didn't answer, but his eyes said it all, and Botan realized that he really had been concerned on stage when he saw her crying. She took in a deep breath and then released it. "Okay…" she whispered. "This is hard for me, Hiei. It's just…Hope's…I mean, your mother's father passed away, and he was the one who supported her." Hiei nodded for her to continue when she paused. She inhaled deeply once more and then exhaled. "My…my parents died when I was ten." Hiei looked completely stunned. "My…older sister became our legal guardian, and my older brother helps out as authority figure. I have three other sisters, one who was a baby when they died.

"My older brother is probably the only one other than Yusuke who supports me," she continued, her hand covering her mouth as she started crying. "My parents always supported me, too, and loved me. My older sister, too, until this all happened. My youngest sister is good with me, but my two other sisters tear me down any chance they get, and Shizuru doesn't interfere much anymore because she's just given up on them. She's been so different ever since she broke up with her last boyfriend. My brother had been here at school and had to return home to keep us all stable. It was a nightmare.

"Anyway," she said, sitting back in the chair and pushing her hair out of the way, "I didn't mean to go so far off on a tangent, but the whole thing just reminded me of myself and I empathized too deeply with your mother and her character. I'm sorry if I worried you or ruined the scene."

"You didn't ruin the scene," Hiei corrected, his hand clamping onto her shoulder startling Botan. His red orbs bore into her amethyst. "I'm sorry you've gone through all of that. I can relate."

Botan's expression became grim. "I know. To be honest, Yukina told me. For what it's worth, you were wronged. I can understand why you don't trust others, and I'm sorry for that. All I can say is that you've done amazingly for yourself despite the odds you were given. I'm...proud, to be your friend."

Hiei didn't correct her that time feeling a warm tingling in his chest. He hadn't felt anything like that since he was a child and his mother praised him for his one-hundred and five percent on a spelling test. It was strange that Botan, a girl he was only just starting to get to know, could illicit the same reaction.

"We should head out," Botan suggested. "It's been a day, and I'm exhausted. Hey, I know. Would you like to come back to the apartment with me for dinner? Yukina and I were going to order sushi. I think she told me you like sushi, too."

"I do," Hiei confirmed. He looked over at the clock hanging in the auditorium and shrugged. "Sure, why not? I have nothing else to do today."

Botan's expression brightened, and Hiei could tell that his acceptance of her invitation made her happy. It was strange how quickly her mood could shift. It almost reminded him of his mother, though his mother was much more controlled than Botan seemed to be. Of course, Botan did somewhat act the way his mother had always described herself before she had the two children alone. To be honest, he hoped Botan stayed that way. No one else deserved the same fate as his mother.

"You all right?"

Hiei's eyes met Botan's concerned ones as he nodded to reassure her. "Just thinking about the scene," he lied casually. "You did some nice work."

That also made Botan grin, and Hiei could have sworn that, in that moment, he felt his heart skip a beat.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the song "Crossroads" by Jim Brickman (though it has now become my favorite song due to the scene I've pictured for it :D), nor do I own "All At Once" by The Fray.

I know it's been a while, and I could give excuses, but I'm just going to talk about the chapter. There are two songs that, when they pop up on my IPod, my mind immediately comes to this story. One of them is the piano song that the first part of this chapter will showcase. It's a song by mine and my mom's favorite pianist, and the scene that came to mind for the story when I listened to it, has haunted me for a very long time, so I'm very happy to finally get to this point. I hope you all enjoy this next installment.

Onward!

* * *

The week had passed on without a hitch, and Hiei was spending more time with Botan and his sister. At first, it had been out of sympathy for Botan, but it made Yukina happy to have him over as well. Plus, Yukina and the woman also had a full kitchen in their apartment. It was much better that eating that instant ramen his roommates kept making.

Being at the apartment also gave Hiei more time to work with Botan, the two of them reading lines in her room after dinner. Botan still needed to use her script, but she definitely made more eye contact meaning she was definitely learning her lines. They didn't dance in her small room, but everything leading up and after, they practiced.

Since he was spending so much time with Botan, Hiei was starting to tolerate her presence and idiosyncrasies. She was honestly very bright, which was something he hadn't expected. Sure, she could play the piano and had so much life, but she was well-versed in all subjects, and Hiei could tell she was a very hardworking student much like he was always forced to be. Her cheerful disposition, the one that normally sickened him, was not her only setting. There were times she'd get lost in thought and grow pensive, especially during the scenes they practiced.

Hiei had not forgotten her confession during their last rehearsal, all she had been through. He had not lied when he said he could relate. When his mother had died, hell ensued around him. According to this woman, her family was hardly any different. Sure, she was kept and not abandoned, but other than her brother and the baby of the family she had no one. Her brother had been away at school, and her older sister hadn't been much help to the family after her breakup. For all intents and purposes, Botan was left to her own devices, and she became a good person all on her one.

One who made him feel things he long thought dead and buried.

When she had expressed pride in his accomplishments, it had not been because she felt that she was a part of his success. She wasn't trying to win him over with pretty words. She was truly proud of his strength and resolve, and her words affected him in ways he wasn't yet ready to acknowledge.

Where he had hoped for them to get to know each other, this was too close, and yet he didn't fully mind. Hiei just didn't know how to proceed. For now, he assumed, it was best to continue as normal. They would work on his show, both the music and running lines, and _maybe_ they'd engage in some form of conversation. At this point, that was all Hiei would allow.

Hiei was to meet Botan in chorus room, as usual. It always made him wonder where else Botan spent her time. Every time he arrived, she was working on music for her portfolio. Part of the thespian wondered if she ever left the room, but she had to when she had class, so he forced that thought from his mind. It wasn't his business where his costar spent most of her time. If it were up to him, he'd be on the stage the majority of his time. The stage was the one place he could be someone else. On stage, he wasn't Hiei, the orphaned child struggling on the streets. Of course, this time, he made the show personal. It was a challenge for him, but he would face it, even if he had to become the one person he hated for a short time. It was a story that needed to be told.

As usual, he entered the room and heard Botan playing yet another work of hers, but unlike other times, the woman was frustrated. She slammed on the keys before stopping her tape recorder, and then she buried her head in her hands. Hiei's brow quirked in interest and confusion. For all the time he had known Botan, which come to think of it wasn't that long, she had never acted angry or upset like this, especially not while playing the piano. At first, he couldn't tell what had her so frustrated, but then he could hear her muttering insults to the air.

She was frustrated with herself.

Hiei's expression softened, able to relate to the woman. He was no stranger to berating himself, though usually it was in the form of constructive criticism. Well, except when it came to the script of his play. Then, it was just pure disappointment in his abilities. Perhaps, that was what the woman was feeling now.

Of course, Hiei was not one to give pep talks, especially when they were not needed. He had heard Botan play multiple times, and her ability to write music on the spot was amazing. This woman was creative and free-spirited, all of the things his mother used to be before her illness. There was no reason for her to act this way.

"Do you usually throw random temper tantrums?"

Botan gasped, startled by Hiei's arrival and words. She turned around to face him, and Hiei nearly flinched. He could see the fresh stains of tears. Clearly, she had been upset about something, and he mentally kicked himself for his crass remark. He hated when women cried as a rule. He did not want to be the cause.

Clearly, he wasn't, though, as Botan weakly smiled at him. "Not usually. I'm just having a bad day is all," she answered, and Hiei relaxed. She sounded chipper as she spoke despite the tears that she wiped away. "I didn't realize it was time to meet. I've been struggling with this one song for a while, and something else happened today that made it even harder to concentrate."

It hadn't been long since Hiei last allowed Botan to open up. Where he had expected it to feel like a mistake later on, he actually hadn't minded. He had decided that maybe it would be a decent idea to embrace this "friendship," as the woman saw it, which would also increase their chemistry and make it easier to work with and tolerate her, unlike in the past where his costars infuriated him to no end.

"What happened?" he asked, grabbing a chair and twisting it around so that he straddled it, facing the back and leaning on it.

His questioned surprised Botan, her wide eyes blinking in disbelief. "Um…it was really nothing."

"You say that all the time," Hiei grunted before he scoffed a chuckle. "I guess I'm no better. Still, I'm sure we already established that this isn't nothing."

"It won't affect the show," she countered, which was Hiei's concern the previous week. Well, there was some concern on his part, then, basically on if he had wronged her or caused her temperament, or if it was something in the show. Hiei didn't need to be bothered with her home life any more than he already had been.

Hiei sighed. "Just answer the damn question, Botan."

Both parties were shocked when Hiei used her name. He had used her name a lot the previous week, but usually when he was making a point or trying to encourage her to speak with him. This time, it just sounded so casual, as it left his lips. He cleared his throat being the first to regain his composure. Botan released a heavy breath before shaking her head. "Like I said, Hiei," she murmured, "it's nothing. Just some family drama, is all. One of my younger sisters decided to call me and rub something in my face, something that happened a long time ago that's still affecting me. It was just really stupid, but it's not a big deal. I figured I'd come here earlier and try to work on my main piece that I've been stuck on, and every time I think I've gotten somewhere, it just dies and fails. I don't know what else to do. I don't want to scrap the piece. I love it, but I just can't figure out how to finish it."

So, part of it was life issues while the other part was difficulties with her work. Hiei could definitely relate to both. An idea entered his head, and the words escaped him before he could rethink them.

"Play it."

Botan looked incredibly confused, eyes widening comically before her brow furrowed. "P-Pardon?"

Hiei repeated himself. "Play it. Let me hear it."

"You're serious?" Botan marveled, disbelieving. Last time she had asked him an opinion on her song, she had to beg for him to give an opinion, and now he was offering one. She didn't know what to make of his offer. To be honest, she half-expected him to tell her to get over it and put it away for the day so that they could work on the show.

His stern, crimson eyes met her downtrodden amethysts. "I am."

She turned away from him feeling the tension creep into her shoulders. She hated being put on the spot, but she really did want to try to salvage this song. The melody had haunted her for some time, and it just seemed like a waste to let it die then and there. Hiei was giving her song a chance to grow, to be complete. Despite her reluctance, she needed to do this, for the song and for herself. "O…Okay…"

Botan attempted to steady her hands as she let them rest on the keys. Before playing, she inhaled deeply and breathed out as she began to play. The first soft notes were enough to catch Hiei's attention, much like anything this woman played. At first, the song started off fairly tranquil, beautiful, and slow. He watched from his seat as the woman played, her hands gliding over the keys before the tone of the song became deeper, louder, and more profound, but just as soon as the power entered the song, the tranquility came back.

Eventually, the song veered in a completely different direction that Hiei expected, the somber becoming more energetic, peaking at a high note that conveyed some type of inexplicable joy. Hiei had never heard a tune so full of emotion that it could evoke any of those emotions in him. It impressed him, and the thought of where the song was going excited him. Disappointment followed, though, as the tone became more dark and desolate, the feeling of hope dying with her song as it began to slow with the broken melody, and he could tell where the song was becoming difficult for her. His brow furrowed. The song couldn't end like this. It did not suit its player.

Botan was once again feeling frustration when she could not hear where this song could go. She was torn between ending the song abruptly so that Hiei could critique it and throwing a fit like she did before Hiei made his presence known. Why couldn't she bridge this gap? The rest of the song had come to her so easily. Was this all it could ever be?

She was hopeless.

Hiei shocked Botan when he threw himself on the bench next two her a mere minutes into her play, taking over, bringing the melody back to life playing the melody in a lower key. Her mouth dropped open as she stared at the man, his brow furrowed in concentration as he restore life, energy, and vigor back into her piece. It nearly brought Botan to tears before a beautifully wonderful idea hit her. As the melody started to come to a close, she too began to play along with Hiei, a higher, softer tone than he had been playing, picking up where he left off.

It was as if Hiei could tell what Botan was thinking as she glanced back his way, stopping abruptly as he began to play once again. The two went back and forth for a while, the song ending with Botan's joyful, hopeful descant ending with his powerful, supportive backing.

The two remained frozen in time at the piano as their eyes met, the two slowly removing their hands from the keys. They continued to hold each other's gaze before the sound of Botan's tape recorder clicked, ending the tape. It snapped Botan out of her trance, and she turned to grab the recorder and rewind the tape. She nearly cried out in joy and relief that the whole song was there. Tears once again came to her eyes, but for a completely different reason as she looked to Hiei again to thank him.

Hiei, though, still seemed to be in a trance, his eyes trapped in a haze as he watched the woman's movements. He hadn't been able to look away from her, but when she had looked away he started to come to. His face was more neutral when she returned her attention to him, but there was still something hidden beneath the surface. Botan could feel it.

She was the first to pull away.

Her first instinct was to reach out to Hiei, to thank him and pull him back, but it felt like such an invasion, both physically and emotionally. Hiei didn't know that she could sense what he was feeling. It was enough for her to know that her song had touched him, had implored him to help her complete it, and brought them closer in just a handful of minutes. It was too overwhelming.

"Thank you," she breathed out, looking over to him once she had put enough space between them giving her the ability to rein in her own emotions. Hiei eyed her strangely, not understanding her behavior, but nodded his acknowledgement. "I…you don't know how much it means to me."

"I do," Hiei responded matter-of-factly. She seemed stunned, and Hiei realized that he was being too honest. Somehow, he could feel from her song just how she actually felt, but _she_ didn't need to know that. "We both take pride in our work." Botan smiled at that, agreeing. "What's it called?"

"Hm?"

"The song," Hiei elaborated.

"Oh," Botan whispered before grinning. "'Two Paths.'"

"Hn." Hiei grunted, smirking. "Fits."

Botan looked over at the clock and noticed that quite a bit of time had passed between the song playing and their exchange, not a lot of time, but it did cut into the time they needed to take to work on Hiei's show. "Oh, I'm sorry," she remarked. "I got caught up with the song that I wasn't even thinking about the play."

"It's fine," Hiei stated, his voice abnormally calm that it even made him wince. "We have plenty of songs written to keep going with these first run-throughs of the scenes and working with what we already have. We can call it a day."

"But you came all the way here…"

Hiei needed to say something to explain his unusual action, the reality being that he needed some air. Something had shifted since he jumped in on Botan's song, and he didn't understand it. Botan was acting differently, too, and Hiei was uncertain. It would be better for both of them if they got out of the room for a little while and went their separate ways. They would see each other at rehearsal later, anyway, and Hiei was certain they'd both reset themselves and revert to normal.

"At least let me make you lunch," Botan offered, and Hiei's eyes widened a fraction. "As a thank you. For helping me with the song, I mean."

He should have refused; he knew that the second her offer was place. Something just seemed off, and Hiei could not tell what it was for the life of him. He needed to walk away, even if it meant leaving Botan behind without an answer.

So, anyone could imagine his surprise when the two of them ended up walking back to the apartment together.

* * *

Yukina had had a fairly normal day. As per usual, Botan was already gone by the time the teal-haired girl had awoken. It concerned Yukina that Botan would leave so incredibly early to go to the music hall seeing as it never seemed like any of their breakfast food was missing. Yukina even tried to get Botan to agree the night before to let her make her breakfast, but the blue-haired teen politely rejected her offer. She had assured Yukina that she would be fine, much like she did each time Yukina made the offer.

Most of the time, Botan didn't return to the apartment until late in the day, now mainly do her rehearsal for her brother's play. The thought alone put Yukina's mind at ease. She knew her brother would look out for Botan. He had been coming around more often than not, and he had even come to have dinner with them a couple times after rehearsal. It was the most she had seen of her brother in a long time, and she knew for a fact that it had more to do with Botan than her.

That wasn't to say that Hiei wasn't there for her. To be fair, when they had come across each other again in school, it was a surprise on both their parts. Hiei had been distant, very far away from her even when he was sitting right in front of her. She attempted to engage with him whenever she could. Hiei would answer her questions with only a few word, but he humored her. He also looked out for her and protected her, even from his past.

The fact that she was getting to see him more made her happy. She knew that it was because he was there to run lines with or see Botan, but it was a good thing. His twin knew for a fact that Hiei _never_ went to visit his costars to run lines. He had always gone out to the theater to run lines in the past. She knew because he would always go out after he had moved in with her and Rui. She never once met any of his colleagues.

It went without saying that Hiei treated Botan differently. She couldn't put her finger on how, but he did. At first, he didn't seem very accepting of Botan, but he finally seemed to see what Yukina did when she met the girl. Her brother could use another friend, she figured.

Yukina knew her brother would scold her for being overly concerned about her roommate or about whether or not he was making friends, so she continued about her day. She had gone to her classes, gotten lunch, and decided to take a trip to the library. It was a lovely day, and so she did not wish to return to the apartment. Instead, she wanted to check out a book of poetry, find a nice space near the manmade pond lake fountain, and read for a bit before returning home.

So here she was in the library searching through the section of the romanticism period.

It was there that she found a book of poetry her mother had always had lying around. Yukina didn't remember much of her mother, but she remembered her reading from a book that looked similar to the one she had just glanced at, _The Complete Poems_ by John Keats. She went to reach for it, but her hand was met with another going for the same book. "Sorry," an unusually familiar voice said smoothly. "I wasn't paying attention."

Yukina turned to see a familiar redhead, the older brother of her friend and roommate, and she smiled as recognition crossed over his features. "Oh, hi Yukina. I didn't expect to see you here."

The girl giggled at that. He sounded kind of relieved and happy to see her, actually. "I'm actually surprised you're here," she lightly countered. "Aren't you here for engineering?"

"Yes, but I do enjoy a good poem every so often," he admitted. "I just was out of it for the moment and didn't realize someone was already reaching for the book."

"Something on your mind?" Yukina asked softly.

"Actually, yeah, but I wouldn't want to bother you with it," he stated. "It's possible I'll offend you, and I'd hate to do that to one of my sister's friends. I'll get over it."

"Kazuma," she breathed out, "you can tell me. I'm sure I'll understand."

"Even if it has to do with your brother and his play?" the redhead retorted, surprising Yukina. He sighed and shook his head. "I have nothing against the guy. I hardly know him. All I know, though, is that I'm not thrilled with the idea that Botan's in some sort of romance play with practically a stranger. I'm afraid this is going to be too much for her, and she's been through enough as it is."

Yukina nodded, and she did understand. "I know. Botan told me." Kuwabara was shocked at that. "But, please, let me put your mind at ease. My brother is very professional ad respectful of his costars. I've never met any that have complained, though the rest of the cast probably complains about his strict attitude. He is all about getting to know his costars so that they don't feel uncomfortable, even if he doesn't really like them, though I can tell he and Botan are getting along well. He has been coming around here for dinners to run lines with her, and they meet almost every day to come up with music together. I think they're both having fun."

That was a relief to hear, but Kuwabara was still wary. He knew his sister. She was timid around those she didn't know well. Even if what Yukina said was true, it was only a matter of time before Hiei started getting too close to his baby sister (though, he had to keep reminding himself she wasn't a baby anymore). He wanted to be able to protect her. Her own friend had put her through enough. Still, the brother had to learn to accept that his sister was an adult, well almost, and could make her own choices.

"Thanks for the reassurance," he replied, "but I still worry about her and her involvement in the show. Over the years, she's become distant and rarely talks about how she feels. Even I have to pry it out of her, and sometimes she still doesn't tell me anything. I'm just afraid this play will bring out the worst in her."

Yukina placed a comforting hand on the man's shoulders and smiled brightly. "Don't worry so much," she chided. "If that's the case, I'll still be there for her. Everything is going to be okay."

Her words brought a smile to Kuwabara's face. He was grateful that his sister had made such a good friend. It was hard to believe this girl was related to his moody roommate, his sister's costar, but he was thankful to see that she cared about his sister. After Botan's friendship with Keiko had ended, she had no female friends to talk to at all. She had been all alone.

But now, it seemed she wasn't anymore, and he was glad she came to school with him.

* * *

" _Damn it all,"_ "Preston" shouted.

Botan had been sitting with the rest of the cast watching Hiei perform on stage. He had just gotten through a very heated scene where Preston and his father had a disagreement about the business, how it should be run, and what Preston's responsibilities would be. The father had wanted one-hundred percent compliance, but instead he was met with rebellious fury. He wanted to send Preston away. Preston did not want to leave and threatened to quit and make his own way in the world. He asked his father if the company would survive his abrupt leave right after his ended engagement, and the man screamed at him for a good long while about how Preston was a disrespectful brat and that he would never amount to anything before slamming the door leaving his son to become irate.

Hiei stood up from the desk. They were finally starting to use props, some sets already made. Preston's office was one of them, and it made the scene look even more realistic. Botan wondered what everything would look like once costumes were designed. Everything was coming together, including the music. She was starting to memorize all her lines from the first couple of scenes, not that she had very many at the start. She and Hiei were becoming more in sync with the dances which amazed her because she had been worried she wouldn't remember the steps. That didn't matter with Hiei. Dancing with him felt natural, and he did not make her memorize any steps. They just were.

"Preston" went to his window, looking out before scoffing. As his eyes returned to his desk, he saw a piece of paper, the piece of paper that "contained" Hope's number. He reached for it before he snapped out of his daze, and then he started to sing.

" _There are certain people you just keep coming back to,"_ he sang as he started to walk passed the desk, glancing back at the number. _"She is right in front of you."_

He shook his head and continued to look around the office like he was searching. _"You begin to wonder, could you find a better one. Compared to her, now she's in question."_

With that, the beat picked up, and Hiei began to move along to the music, Botan entranced. _"And all at once the crowd begins to sing,"_ he declared looking between family picture and the phone number as he sang the next line. _"Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same."_

He grabbed the number, holding it like it was his salvation in the light in front of the window. _"Maybe you want her, maybe you need her, maybe you started to compare to someone not there."_

As the guitar played, Hiei transitioned, the set slightly transforming, opening up to show people walking on the street. Hiei started looking between all the people. _"Looking for the right one, you line up the world to find where no questions cross your mind."_

He "crossed" the street, grabbing onto a lamppost and swinging, looking up to the sky with his hand as a visor. _"But she won't keep on waiting for you without a doubt much longer for you to sort it out."_ Hiei jumped off as he sang the last few words.

" _And all at once the crowd begins to sing,"_ he sang again, and Botan sighed before smiling. Hiei seemed to be completely in his element, and, as she thought before, it was amazing to watch. _"Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same."_

" _Maybe you want her, maybe you need her, maybe you started to compare to someone not there."_

Botan thought back to earlier in the day when he had helped her with her song. She knew now wasn't the time or the place for that, but it just hit her how much Hiei could actually do. He could write, sing, dance, act, play the piano; he was amazing. The set switched back to the office. " _Maybe you want it, maybe you need it, maybe it's all you're running from."_ He grabbed the number off the desk again, and this time grabbed the phone. " _Perfection will not come."_

The guitar started to play softly as the sound of ringing and a phone hanging up played, Hiei leaning against the desk and tapping his foot before he gave up and set down the phone, quietly and hopelessly singing, " _And all at once the crowd begins to sing…Sometimes..."_

He pushed himself off the desk looking slightly hurt and his call being ignored. _"We'd never know what's wrong without the pain. Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same."_

Just then, extra dancers popped into the office, dancing along with Hiei, all calling out, _"Maybe you want her, maybe you need her, maybe you've started to compare to someone not there."_ Botan nearly freaked out. She was supposed to be backstage already. She hightailed it over, hoping Hiei didn't notice that she wasn't prepared.

They broke away, Hiei reaching for the phone as he stopped singing, the dancers continuing, while trying to pull him away from the phone from a distance. _"Maybe you want it, maybe you need it, maybe it's all you're running from.  
_

" _Perfection will not come…will never come."_

The dancers faded out adding, _"Maybe you want her, maybe you need her, maybe you had her, maybe you lost her to another…"_

" _To another,"_ Hiei spoke before the sound of the line picking up followed by a quiet _"hello"_ that Botan spoke into a microphone provided for her.

" _Hope,"_ Preston said in relief. _"You didn't answer-"_

" _Now isn't a good time,"_ "Hope" nervously said. She sounded awful, distressed, and Preston's brow furrowed.

" _Are you all right?"_

The set shifted slightly to reveal that of a grandiose living area, and Botan was standing there with another woman crossing her arms and looking incredibly impatient. _"Everything is fine. I'm just in the middle of a discussion with my mother. I'll call you back."_

Preston couldn't say anything before the phone had clicked off. He stared at the object before returning it to his desk. His part of the scene ended with him looking off into the distance with a forlorn look, hoping that the woman who had consumed his thoughts was okay. The light faded out, and the stage crew moved the set so it fully showed that of Hope's home, a yellow-walled mansion with white finishings and a brick fireplace with luxurious furniture. Hope was sitting on a green velvet couch as the woman who played the mother interrogated her. _"Who was that?"_

" _No one,"_ Hope lied, looking terrible. Of course, the mother looked unconvinced. _"It was just a friend I met out."_

" _A boy?"_ the woman scoffed as if the word itself was distasteful. _"I allowed you to go out with your friends as a reward for your grades. I didn't expect you to become such a harlot overnight."_

Botan cringed at the harsh words, remembering when certain classmates called her the same thing. It bothered her that this was how Hiei portrayed his grandmother, and he wondered how much his mother and father truly had to suffer from their own lives. On the one side, his father had unsupportive parents who would have allowed him to marry a cheater, and on the other, his mother had a vicious woman holding her tuition for ransom unless she agreed to enter the business field. These people were horrible.

" _I never said it was a guy,"_ Botan clipped indignantly, glaring at the woman. At least it was becoming easier to do that. _"And you shouldn't talk about your daughter that way, especially when you don't know_ what _I did last night. I simply spent an evening with the girls."_

The mother was unconvinced, but let it slide. _"Watch how you talk to me,"_ she ordered. _"Now, go clean yourself up. Bryson will be stopping by with his parents. I swear if you mess this up-"_

" _Yeah, yeah, whatever,"_ Hope huffed before starting to walk away.

" _Hopefully, he'll be able to look past your hideous figure."_

Botan froze as she reached the stairs looking back to the woman feeling hurt. The mother just left the room leaving her wounded daughter. Her head drops in defeat as the darkness surrounded her, the woman feeling all alone.

Hiei had been watching the scene intently, seeing all of the emotions flicker over Botan's face. He knew she wasn't an actress, so the emotions were real and raw. It impressed him that she could feel so much just reading the script. She was a natural, and she didn't know it. Up on stage, he could pretend to feel, but once the spotlight was off him he went back to his neutral stoicism or anger. Botan was truly something else, and he was reminded of that every time he saw her, especially today.

He couldn't get that moment of the writing the song out of his head.

Hiei had never felt connected to anyone, but that was as close as it could ever get, he was certain. His eyes looked at the time. There was still plenty. He knew he and Botan were fine for the scene that had been the audition piece, but the other dancers needed their practice. "Alright, everyone," he declared, barking orders, "anyone who isn't part of the next scene is dismissed. Everyone else, take five."

Many started to gather their belongings and scurry, all except for Koto who decided to show up for the day. She was glowering at the stage, at Botan and the amazing way she handled the scene. Hiei scoffed. This woman was pathetic. She would not be needed when the time came.

Speaking of, Botan showed up beside him looking worried. "So how did I do?"

Hiei smirked and shook his head. She was always looking for his approval that it was laughable, but strangely refreshing. "You were fine," he assured her, his voice full of amusement. "Though it amazes me that you can act out the emotions so well without any prompting."

Botan seemed surprise before she grew nervous again. "Uh, well…you know me," she said before forcing a laugh. She actually hadn't expected him to pick up on that so soon. His friend, Kurama knew, but she knew Hiei would probably laugh in her face if she admitted to being an empath. He probably didn't even believe in that stuff anyway. "It's easy to slip into character. You wrote them well."

Though Hiei didn't visibly react, he felt a jolt from the praise. He had been used to praise, ever since he became an actor, but with the professionals he worked with, praise was always followed with constructive criticism and never just that. With his costars and other actors and actresses, it was all fake. Hiei never cared. He never needed anyone's approval, but then this woman had to go and say those words with the sincerest of gazes on her ever expressive face. He swallowed thickly feeling uncertain for the first time while being around her.

Unbeknownst to Hiei, Kurama was watching the interaction with shrewd crafty smile. He could tell that working with Botan was already having some effect on his friend, much quicker than even Kurama himself had anticipated. He wondered just how much time the two had been spending together to work on the show, and now his mind was calculating when it would become something more.

Moments later, though, Hiei pulled away from Botan looking incredibly flustered, though only someone who knew him well and the concerned little empath watching walk away with worried eyes reaching out to him could tell that something was amiss even as he barked out orders for the dancers to get ready on set. He glanced back at Botan before heading to the stage, and the girl looked like she felt guilty over something. It was definitely more fun to be the onlooker, Kurama had to venture a guess. Botan's expression fell as she slowly retreated to the other side of the stage ready to take her position.

" _You weren't at the meeting,"_ the student starring as Preston's father hissed. _"Where were you?"_

" _Out,"_ Hiei growled, lying down on a bed. The time that passed between the two scenes would imply that the rest of the day Preston had shirked his company duties. He had left to clear his head and get away, ending up back in his own room feeling drained.

The father scoffed, his tone full of derision. _"I don't know what we're going to do with you, Preston. You can't run off like a child when you don't want to work. You need to focus and get your head out of the clouds. I don't know what's wrong with you, but snap out of it. You have a duty to the co-"_

" _To the company, right,"_ Preston returned. _"And let me ask you something, father. Do you not have a duty to your family? You're a fine businessman, but a sorry excuse of a man."_

" _You impudent, little bastard,"_ the actor snarled. _"Just wait until your mother gets home."_

" _Hm…"_ Preston dismissed him. _"Whatever."_

The angered father left his rebellious son alone to his thoughts, and, once again, the stage transformed as Hiei left the bed to go to the window, before a white backdrop was filling the stage. The music started, the song from the day Hiei made Botan audition for Hope, just to see their chemistry. Botan still looked nervous, but she was becoming more confident with herself on the stage and in his presence. As she walked over to him, he took her hand and began to guide her around the stage as the song played through.

Though that had had a strange moment after she had complimented him, both Hiei and Botan felt better once they started to move with one another. Botan was more at ease dancing with him, still not trying to lead him in any way. Just as what happened during the audition, Hiei's eyes refused to leave hers. He stared at her so attentively, and Botan could swear she felt every single one of his hidden emotions, though this time the troubled pain she normally felt from him was lessened somehow, and he actually felt kind of pleasant. At the thought, Botan blushed and bit her lip, a nervous habit of hers. Hiei was confused by her demeanor, but simply smirked at her as they reached the end of the song. When it ended, Hiei was holding Botan close to him and the two of them were trying to catch their breath.

"Cut," Hiei whispered, his voice unusually soft and strange to him.

"O-Okay…" the woman replied, the two experiencing some unknown sensation together. Hiei had to admit that this day was just getting weird.

Botan felt so flustered after getting lost in Hiei's eyes during the course of the scene. Had he not stopped her, she would have continued to move, not knowing that the end of the song had come. That would be bad for the show if she couldn't focus because she was distracted by Hiei. And that brought a question to her mind.

Why was she getting distracted by Hiei?

It occurred to her that she usually did, though not to the point where she noticed. Had Hiei noticed? Would he say something? She hadn't even known what happened until she was entranced until he spoke and snapped her back to reality, and he was holding her so close. She needed to get away from him, just for the day so she could shake everything off. They had been close all day on an emotional level, and where it was good for their friendship, Botan feared that she'd somehow mess it up. She wasn't expecting to cross that boundary and become so connected so quickly.

Rehearsal was over, though, so that was a plus.

"Botan."

The woman nearly froze when she heard his soft, baritone voice and nearly stumbled back. Hiei's brow quirked in confusion before he simply shook her head, his expression becoming neutral. "H-Hello, Hiei," she said a little too enthusiastically. "I think that went splendidly. Same time tomorrow."

"We're not done tonight," Hiei remarked causing Botan's stomach to drop. "Yukina invited me over for dinner, and I wanted to run over some lines."

"O-Oh," Botan stammered, trying to get ahold of herself. "Well, that's all hunky-dory…we'd be happy to have you over."

Hiei searched her for a moment, noticing her tense posture and thinking over her strange behavior. "Are you all right?"

"I'm as right as rain," Botan chimed, gathering her belongings. "Shall we?"

Hiei watched her retreating form not understanding her change in behavior. She wasn't fine, but she wasn't distraught either, and Hiei had no idea what could have caused that reaction. When they danced, she had been nervous, but that hadn't happened before and she never acted so flighty afterwards. Well, there was nothing he could do about it. She knew she could come to him. He'd try to get a better read on her when they went over a future scene. For the most part, she was an open book wearing her emotions on her sleeve. He would figure her out.

Or at least he thought he could.

* * *

They were reading over the part where Hope and Preston met up again for the second time while Yukina was cooking dinner. Hiei didn't want to include Yukina in on all of this, especially because she would not approve on how he planned to end the show. When Yukina suggested they run lines in Botan's room, Hiei jumped on that opportunity though Botan seemed on edge. They had run lines in her room previously, so Hiei had no idea what was up with her.

Maybe it was because they spent the whole day together.

Of course, that was only partly true. Botan didn't mind spending the day with him. Truthfully, she had enjoyed it, and that made her nervous. So much had happened between them in just one day that made strange feelings pile up in her. She needed to shake them off, but it was hard when they were sitting so close together on her small sofa. Hiei looking at her so intently didn't help things, either.

They were in the middle of the discussion where Preston had said to Hope that he was surprised she had asked him to meet her out in a park late at night. He made a joke that some might see that as a little suspect, making Hope chuckle at the terrible and crass joke. The woman had sighed and informed Preston of her life and status, how important her father was. Preston was shocked. Hope's father was one of the top businessmen in the country, and Preston asked why she hadn't told him before. She explained to him that it was a terrible opening line because you could never trust the intentions of someone. Preston had asked her why she was telling him now, and that's when Hope broke down and hid herself against her lap.

Of course, they were just reading the lines, not necessarily acting it out. _"H-Hope,"_ Preston stammered. _"I'm sorry. What did I say?"_

" _Nothing,"_ Hope replied, Botan nearly whispering the line. _"You said nothing. I-It's just I…I didn't mean to rush you off the phone. I got into a fight with my mother. I-It was bad."_

Hiei gently touched Botan's shoulder, jolting her out of the script. _"Hope, it's okay. I understand. To be honest, my father and I had just gotten into a fight before I called you. I…wanted to talk to you."_

The action read that Hope looked at Preston with teary eyes before she hid herself again, crying and shaking. _"You…you wouldn't say that if you knew. I didn't tell you."_

" _Sh, please don't cry,"_ Hiei read, embracing Botan as per the action. _"I just can't stand seeing someone…"_ He noticed the woman's eyes widen as she read the next action. This is why Hiei had wanted to work on the scene. It would be coming up in rehearsals sometime soon, and Botan needed to be prepared for the first kiss Preston and Hope would share. _"…cry."_

Gently and cautiously, he moved guide Botan's face to her and attempt to kiss her, but the woman abruptly stopped the action by nearly smacking him as she pushed the actor away from her, blinking at him warily as he glared at her. "S-Sorry," she apologized. "I guess I wasn't ready. I'll…try again."

Hiei nodded, understanding. When he had first started acting, the idea of kissing a costar had bothered him. Of course, he was young, had never even had his first kiss before he had to enact one. His costar had been understanding, guiding him through it, and his manager had been pretty supportive knowing he was just a kid off of the streets. He had explained to Hiei that it was just an action and didn't mean anything, and he was prepared to give Botan the same speech if she acted out again.

" _I just can't stand seeing someone cry,"_ Hiei's soft voice repeated the line before he reached for Botan and pulled her towards him. His lips almost touched hers, but Botan yelped and smacked him off of the couch, Hiei blinking in shock at the woman's strength before he grew quite irritated. He sat up on the floor Indian-style and glowered up at his costar. "Really?"

"I'm sorry!" Botan cried indignantly, crossing her arms, but hugging herself and looking away. She looked so vulnerable in that moment before she got up and walked away from him. Hiei's brow furrowed at that. She did that a lot, putting physical distance between them. It was…eccentric, weird. Hiei didn't know what to make of it. Her quiet whispers reached him. "I'm just not used to this."

"Hn," he scoffed. "We're just acting, Botan. It doesn't mean anything." His eyes widened as he said the words that were said to him. He had been prepared to say them, but he remembered the _reason_ he and his manager had the discussion in the first place. His features relaxed, his eyes becoming a bit more understanding and lenient. "It will be your first, won't it?"

Hiei's voice lacked judgement, and he was being considerate. Botan just wanted to say "yes," to end the discussion, but she couldn't lie to him. She remembered when Yusuke had kissed her, the shock she felt, and the destruction that followed. The thought terrified her. Back then, she made the mental promise never to kiss someone again unless they knew everything about her, and she was so closed off she figured it would never happen.

She remembered a time before a simple, innocent gesture had ruined so many people's lives. Even after, she used to overhead girls talking about their first kiss and how wonderful and nice it felt or was supposed to be. Botan didn't feel any of that in her first kiss, and it's not like she had any friends to ask about it later. Her inner circle had been in turmoil because of it. Sure, maybe it didn't count. That was around the last time Shizuru had said anything supportive. The older woman had asked Botan if she kissed Yusuke back. Botan, with tears in her purple eyes, shook her head as she shook. Her older sister had placed a hand on her shoulder and told her that it didn't truly count then, and one day she'd have a better memory to replace it.

Back then, she believed her sister, but as life got harder and harder and Botan began to isolate herself from her last remaining friend and her family. She never pictured herself dating. No man would ever listen to her story with the kind of patience she needed. Yukina and Kurama were different. First off, Yukina was a woman who had seen tragedy herself, and she was a kind girl, and even though Kurama was a man and had patiently listened, he kept asking questions, trying to dig deeper. He wouldn't let it go if she denied him, and she felt a little bit of pressure. She trusted him not to say anything, but that was the extent. No one would ever just listen and accept it without question, not even Hiei. He kept trying to get her to talk, too, for different reasons, and though he was easy to talk to this was just so hard. How could she explain this all to him without lying and without causing her to judge her?

Nervously, she stuttered, "N-no, b-b-but it's just…"

"Then there shouldn't be a problem," Hiei cut her off practically leaping to his feet. He approached her, and Botan felt trapped. He had every right to be irritated that she had hit him the way she had. He could have retaliated, but he had just stared at her and expressed his anger without blowing up at her. Now, though, she was scared. What was he going to do to her? He sighed and shook his head after he reached her, standing before. "You need to relax, Botan. Nothing is going to happen if you let the scene play out other than we move forward. It's a singular point and it's done. Then, in the future, it will be easier to practice. If you can't kiss me here in the privacy of your own room, you won't be able to do it on stage in front of others. It doesn't have to be a 'perfect' kiss. It's just two people pressing their lips together. It doesn't have to mean anything."

To prove his point, Hiei trapped Botan against the wall and kissed her, Botan's eyes widening as she felt that spark she had always heard people mention. It frightened her, but as Hiei continued to move his lips against hers, she felt very content. Her tense form finally did relax as she let herself fall under this new spell, but it was over as soon as it began and she was jarred back to reality. "See?" Hiei whispered against her lips, his voice sounding more distant than it should. "Nothing."

That good feeling Botan had felt disappeared instantly, her stomach starting to churn anxiously. Well, that was really awkward for her, but she didn't want to put that on Hiei. Hiei probably did this often, and to him it was easier to push it off and move forward. She, though, was not like that, but she couldn't tell Hiei that she felt something. She would have to figure out a way to handle it. "Y-You're right," she lied. "We should probably continue the scene."

Hiei nodded, though he still hadn't pulled away. Light seemed to come back to his eyes, him grunting once again before he walked away. Botan took a deep breath and then forced a smile, determined to keep things normal between them. After dinner, she could rest, and hopefully, after a good night's sleep, all of this would go away.

It just had to.

* * *

A couple of weeks passed by, and the cast was getting into the meat of the play, the whole romance between the two main characters. At first, it was a challenge. Despite practicing with Botan in private, she was very nervous to kiss Hiei with an audience. She had stumbled backwards a couple of times, nearly thrown herself off the stage. She was only making things worse for herself because she had gotten so much extra attention, including from Koto who would snicker to herself as she watched the poor girl flounder. She was just waiting for Hiei to fire her from Hope's roll, and Koto would gladly take over.

Over the course of the first week, though, Botan finally started to swallow her nerves and go along with the scenes. Hiei could tell that his costar was struggling with it a great deal, but he did what he could to make her comfortable. She was becoming more at ease with the action of kissing which made him feel better. By the time winter break came, she would be a natural.

Of course, Hiei wouldn't realize that Botan was just going along with the whole endeavor because she wanted the best for his show. She was honestly really torn up about all the kisses they had shared, mainly because she felt something in each one. Botan felt guilty for indulging in Hiei like this, using him to fulfill this need and desire to feel wanted. If she told him, she was certain he'd hate her, and so she was afraid to admit this to him. She couldn't even confide this in Yukina or Yusuke. She was alone again, just like before.

Maybe, though, there was someone else.

When Botan had dealt with her problems with Yusuke, she went to Shizuru, and she had helped her and been understanding. Part of the girl wondered if her older brother would grant her the same courtesy. He loved her, and he wouldn't think her to be a monster. He also couldn't be mad at Hiei. He was just acting. She was the one using him to get something out of it. Maybe Kazuma could give her the advice she needed.

So, one day, when she knew Yusuke was in class, and Hiei and Kurama were out, she went over to the dorm room and brought Kazuma some lunch. The redhead had been thrilled to see his sister, but his joy disappeared when he saw the uneasy, pensive look on her face. He let her in and took the lunch from her, and his voice was soft and welcoming as he spoke to her. "It's good to see you. How have you been?"

"I've been…busy," Botan offered, taking a seat in their sitting room.

Kuwabara scoffed a bitter chuckle. "Yeah, I heard," he told her. "Never thought you wanted to act."

"I didn't," Botan admitted, "but Hiei insisted. He said I was perfect for the part, that the fact that I thought I couldn't do it meant that I was. You see, it's very personal to him. It's about his parents, and he didn't want his costar to be someone who overlooked that, that tried to take over the show or use his past pain as a meal ticket."

"I didn't know that it was a play about their parents," Kuwabara pondered wondering why Yukina hadn't said anything about that when they talked. He shrugged it off. "Still, he shouldn't force his agenda on you. You may not be cashing in, but he's using you. I mean, what are you even getting out of this experience."

"We've had a lot of fun writing the songs together," Botan explained hurriedly. She didn't want to make her brother think badly of Hiei. He already didn't like Yusuke because of her. "And he isn't using me. I…I want to help. It's just a bit out of my comfort zone is all, but he's been very considerate. He's so patient with me, and when I get upset he convinces me to talk to him about what's bothering. At first he used the guise of the show saying he was only trying to get me to talk for the good of the play, but lately he's been…he's been wonderful Kazuma, and I know I'm going to screw up our friendship."

"What do you mean?" her older brother asked, setting a sandwich and drink down in front of her before bringing his own lunch over and sitting across from her. "If you two are friends, there's nothing you can do to wreck that. It's not like when you were younger."

"But it might be," Botan confessed. She sighed and then shook her head. "Kazuma, I messed up. I always promised myself that after what happened with Yusuke and Keiko, I would never kiss someone until they knew everything and accepted me for the homewrecker I was."

Kuwabara's eyes narrowed. "You're not a homewrecker, and you never were. That punk Urameshi-"

"Please, Kazuma," Botan hushed, holding up her hand. "Let me get this out, okay?"

"Fine," her brother replied. "Continue."

"Anyway, we practiced our first kissing scene a couple of weeks ago," she explained, "and I kept pushing Hiei away. I actually hit him, Kazuma. It was awful. And Hiei tried to explain that a kiss didn't have to mean anything, that we were acting, and then he tried to show me that, but I felt something, and now I feel even worse because while he's under the impression that it's nothing, I'm using him to feel better about myself. I'm so twisted."

Kuwabara's expression softened, and he went to go hug his sister. "You aren't twisted. Hiei shouldn't have said a kiss means nothing. Maybe to some guys it doesn't, but I highly doubt he would feel the same if his sister was in your position. He should have been more sensitive."

"It's not his fault," Botan admonished her brother. "Hiei thought that's what I wanted to hear because I was so stressed about it to begin with. I was making a big deal in my head, and he thought it would help me relax. But then I felt something, and it is getting easier now to kiss him during practice, but only because my mind accepted that it was acceptable, and now I'm the one using him. And I can't exactly tell him that. He'll be worried about every move, wondering what will upset me and what is acceptable, and I don't want to be the reason this show goes south."

"You're being a little overdramatic," Kuwabara tried to soothe her, rubbing her back. "I'm sure if you talked to Hiei about this, if he's as understanding as you say, then maybe he'll have better advice for you."

Botan shook her head erratically. "No, no, no, I can't tell him," Botan argued. "This is my issue, not his. To him, he's just doing his job, and he's used to working with others that can just look the other way. What if he feels violated that I've been using him?"

"What if you feel violated that he's using you?"

"He's not," Botan sincerely stated, her expression calm. "Hiei is the most amazing guy I've ever met. Even if he didn't want to take no for an answer for the show or writing, it has been the most fun I've had, and I'm glad he convinced me to help. I just didn't expect any of this to happen…especially not in such a short time of knowing each other. He can never know how I feel. I don't want to ruin our friendship. I value it too much, Kazuma."

Her brother nodded in acceptance and understanding, though he did not agree with his sister. Hiei needed to know. It was clear he didn't realize it, from what Botan was saying, but the guy was toying with his little sister's emotions and that was not okay with him. If his sister wasn't going to say anything to the guy, then he certainly would.

"Anyway, I need to get to rehearsal," Botan announced. "I'm sorry I just came here and dumped all of this on you. I love you, Kazuma. I just needed someone else to know so that I could get advice. I just feel like I'm a terrible person."

"You are not and could never be a terrible person," Kuwabara assured his sister. "You may not agree with me, but it's the truth, and Hiei's lucky that he has someone like you who actually cares what he thinks and how he feels, because in reality, Botan, he's probably had costars that wanted to take advantage of him. You don't want to, nor do I really think you are. I won't say a kiss is nothing, but it's not wrong to feel something when you kiss someone. That's actually what's supposed to happen, sis, when you're with the right person."

Botan froze at her brother's words. Did that mean Hiei was the right person for her? Is that why she felt something? She didn't know if that was true and was still so confused. Her brother could tell and added, "But you don't need to think about that now. Just keep doing your best. If Hiei doesn't feel anything over the kiss, then it's not hurting him that you feel something. You're the one who I'm worried about getting hurt if he doesn't return your feelings."

"Oh, don't worry about me," Botan said waving him off while releasing a light laugh. "Actually, that makes me feel better. I don't expect Hiei to feel something for me, so I won't get hurt."

Kuwabara didn't believe her, but offered her a smile. "Then, it'll be okay then."

Botan nodded and got up to leave, Kuwabara watching her run through the door. He released a heavy sigh mentally adding in his head, _I hope._

* * *

A/N: I hope these longer chapters are helping with the crazy, lengthy update schedule…and I have to say it was much harder to write what I was picturing while Botan and Hiei were playing the piano together (the song is "Crossroads"). You would definitely have to listen to the song to understand what I envisioned. I could give nearly exact places in the song where I pictured Hiei coming in and the two exchanging harmonies. For those interested, I picture Hiei coming in around 2:03 in the song, and Botan picking back up around 2:23-24 before it keeps shifting back and forth between them. I can picture it beautifully, and I think if came out okay in the writing. I hope you feel the same way :) And if any of you out there are music students or majors, please feel free to let me know how I can improve upon writing and describing these instrumental pieces, because it's going to be a recurring thing in this story ;)


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the song "Enough For Now" by The Fray.

* * *

Rehearsal had gone by quickly that day. Hiei was relieved that whatever had been bothering Botan the past couple of weeks was no longer an issue. When she showed up, she was as chipper as usual, and she and Hiei had gotten through their scenes without a hitch. The only hitch was some of the students acting as the dancers and that annoying Koto who had demanded that he practice dancing with her instead of Botan in case she needed to take over for Botan if something happened to her before the actual show. Hiei wanted to tell the woman where she could go, but Kurama did remind him it was a possibility just in case Botan got sick or something. Botan looked back at him feeling terrible that he had to do something he didn't want to do. He seemed much more closed off to Koto, glowering at her every step of the way.

Botan didn't want to leave him even if they all had been dismissed. Lately, she waited for Hiei and the two would walk back to the apartment where Yukina would have dinner waiting for them. It was kind of nice, having Hiei for a friend. Botan still had trouble accepting that she was starting to have feelings for Hiei, but he didn't have to know. Besides, to him, this was just acting. The two of them weren't a couple, just partners in this endeavor.

She _had_ to keep focusing on that for their friendship. Botan refused to lose anymore friends because of her feelings, lack thereof, or anything else. She just needed to focus on the play and-

Her brain shut down as soon as Koto kissed Hiei right in front of her. That wasn't supposed to happen during the dancing sequence. Maybe, while she was lost in though, they had decided to move forward. Botan's face fell at the sight, but she had to remind herself it was just acting. She didn't have the right to feel this upset. She decided it was probably best to leave the auditorium and deal with these confusing emotions. Hiei didn't need to be dragged down by them. He probably wouldn't even understand. It looked like she would have to avoid him all over again.

Of course, had she stayed just a moment longer, she would have seen Hiei pushing Koto away from him and storming off the stage.

* * *

Hiei was furious. How dare that woman try to insert herself into the show in place of Botan, and how dare she take him by surprise and kiss him like she had. He had zoned out, just focusing on the song and praying it would end soon, when he felt Koto's lips on his. He felt, for lack of a better term, violated, and oh so disgusted. He normally didn't feel that way kissing any female costar, but something about the brunette had him wanting to wash his mouth out with soap.

Upon entering the apartment, Hiei found his roommate, Kuwabara. The redhead looked up from the paper he was reading and glared at actor. "We need to talk," he said, his voice leaving no room for argument.

Hiei almost laughed in his face, but instead scoffed. "Later," he growled. "I need a shower."

While walking away, Hiei was halted by the older man, and he was about ready to pound the guy into the payment. "You have three seconds to remove your hand, and that's three seconds too many."

"Listen, this is important," Kuwabara countered, ignoring the threat. "I need to talk to you about what you said to Botan."

And it all came down to the woman.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Honestly, he didn't. He and Botan conversed quite a bit over the past week, or she chatted while he gave occasional blurbs. "And I have no time to discuss her with you."

"Then you better make time," Kuwabara snapped. "Hiei, what you said to her, that kissing means nothing…that's just a heartless thing to say to a woman, and Botan's really torn up about it."

For a moment, Kuwabara had Hiei's full attention. He hadn't expected Botan to tell anyone anything they said, especially that, but to hear she was upset about it struck an invisible chord in Hiei. He hadn't meant to upset her in any way, shape, or form. In fact, he thought that telling her would be a relief to her, so that she didn't have to put much thought into it, though now that he thought about it…her attitude had changed since he had said that to her. Could that have been what was bothering her? She seemed fine now. Why hadn't she told him, and why was Kuwabara giving him grief?

Oh…of course.

"Don't drag me into your jealous rage," he hissed. "I've already seen you do that enough with Botan's other male companion. If you want her, keep us out of it."

"Are you on something?" Kuwabara shouted, appalled. "That's my sister, you creep!"

Hiei's brow quirked in surprise. Out of all the things he expected the redhead to say, he was not expecting that. Botan had never mentioned that Kuwabara was her brother, though now that he thought about it Hiei never pressed for details. He never asked why Botan was so concerned about Kazuma getting along with Yusuke. He had assumed his roommate to be a jealous boyfriend, or wannabe boyfriend, not a protective older brother. It occurred to Hiei that he had also never asked Botan her full name.

Now, so many things were starting to come together in his mind, but Hiei was shocked. The conversation was now something to be taken seriously. It was one thing when he thought Kuwabara was trying to start something out of pride. Hiei knew that if Yukina were in Botan's position, he'd need to know that she was taken care of, and for that Hiei clamped up and gave his roommate his undivided attention and respect. "You didn't know, did you?"

"I never asked," Hiei admitted, "and I made a couple of assumptions. I'll listen to what you have to say. I know if it was Yukina, I'd kill any bastard toying with her feelings."

Kuwabara nodded. "As long as we're on the same page." The redhead sighed. "Look, I'll level with you and tell you that I ran into your sister and she did her best to reassure me that you'd keep things professional, but my sister isn't an actress, and she doesn't take feelings lightly. She's incredibly considerate of everyone else except for herself, and when it comes to anything about her she feels she's selfish for having any want or desire.

"So imagine how I feel when my sister comes over to confide in me not only what you said about a kiss meaning nothing while she's feeling something," he said disdainfully, "while also thinking she's this horrible person because she couldn't force her emotions aside? She's confused, and she knows it's not supposed to mean anything, and she accepts that that's the way it is. She doesn't even know what she's feeling…"

That explained her strange behavior the week prior. If he had know that she was struggling over her emotions, they could have discussed them. It was possible this was all really new to her. She had admitted to it not being her first kiss, but who knew when her first kiss had taken place and if she had any other experience. From her stories, probably not. He was probably the first guy she was kissing on a regular basis. Of course she'd be confused. "I had and have no intention of hurting my costar," he stated sincerely. "I will correct the matter, I assure you."

"Fine," Kuwabara nearly growled. "You better mean that. My sister has enough going on. She doesn't need this show to be a source of stress."

"I keep trying to convince her to talk to me," Hiei explained. "I told her, if she struggled with anything or anything made her feel uncomfortable, to come to me so we could talk about it. I've been trying to work with her knowing that she had never performed prior to my show."

Kuwabara's expression softened before he sighed. "At least you _are_ actually trying. I appreciate that. Botan keeps a lot bottled up, and her coming to me about this was the first time we had an actual discussion for a while. You're spending the most time with her right now. You better look out for her."

"Of course I will," Hiei dead panned. "She's my costar."

The redhead was still unconvinced, but at least Hiei was _trying_ to appease him. "I guess I'll have to accept that, but, I swear, if you hurt her, you're going to have to answer to me."

With that, Kuwabara swiftly left the common room, slamming his door behind him. He probably wouldn't come out for the rest of the night.

Once Kuwabara left Hiei alone, the teenager was forced to confront his own thoughts of the kiss. Ironically enough, Botan wasn't the only one who had felt something. To be honest, he had never felt a spark like that at any point in his life, so when it happened he felt the need to keep it buried. He had stuck to his plan to make Botan see the kiss as nothing even though he lied as he said the words. It wasn't nothing, but Hiei had spent the week trying to convince himself that there was no spark, that it was a figment of his imagination and that his show was getting to him, but the kiss haunted his thoughts. He couldn't focus in class, couldn't sleep at night, and then he would scoff at himself as he realized how ridiculous and cliché that sounded.

It wasn't even as if he was thinking longingly about their next kiss, wondering when it would be or how it would happen. He knew when they'd be meeting to rehearse. He knew the very moment a kiss would happen because of the scenes he wrote. No, Hiei knew that he had many more opportunities to kiss Botan. How thoughts consisted of _how_ he'd kiss her, each imagined kiss becoming more and more passionate and aggressive. Still, he tried to keep to his actor's mindset, and he fought against his instinct to take it further.

Never, in his entire acting career, had he ever struggled so much with a female costar, but he couldn't find it in himself to regret choosing her. Even though Botan evoked feelings from him every time she looked at him, touched him, and, hell, even tried to engage him in conversation, she had been the best thing that could have happened for the play. She was genuine and played the part perfectly. He was beginning to expect and demand more and more from her, including to push away her emotions.

He realized she had been more distant since the kiss, but it never occurred to him that the kiss affected her, too. Actually, he thought it was just him, that there was something about her that changed his outlook and interfered with his internal mantras. Where he could push it aside and pretend to ignore his feelings, Botan was not the same. He should have known that she was affected.

Talking to her brother must have helped her for she was acting normally again, but Hiei couldn't help but wonder if his callous remark had affected their friendship. He had been lying to himself when he said it meant nothing, but for Botan he had hoped his words would be a comfort. He wasn't trying to undermine the feelings their shared kiss evoked in either of them. It actually reassured him that he wasn't going crazy. Honestly, he was human, and it made sense that he'd have some emotion somewhere underneath the cold exterior. He had just never expected some girl from a town he looked down upon to pull those feelings out of him. It was bizarre, and the situation was becoming more complicated. The reason: Hiei never dated his costars, and he had no intention to do so now. Unfortunately, that didn't solve his problem.

He wanted her.

* * *

The next day Botan woke up and had a good long stretch before her eyes wandered over calendar, her eyes widening when she saw the date. She couldn't believe that the day was finally here, and she hadn't even really noticed.

Today, she was eighteen years old.

Botan had completely forgotten about her birthday having been so wrapped up with the play and her growing feelings for Hiei, mainly the jealousy she felt when she saw Koto kiss Hiei. She had spent the night alone in her room, simply thinking. Past experience told her that that wasn't the best idea. Still, she couldn't help it.

At least it was Saturday.

She knew, eventually, that Yusuke and Kazuma would want to do something. Yusuke had mentioned handling a small party for her that day, though he had yet to tell her what the plan was. At least she would be able to avoid Hiei for the day. It wasn't that she didn't want to see her friend, but she couldn't face him while experiencing such confusion. She needed a breather.

Breakfast would be a nice start.

* * *

"So, Kuwabara," Yusuke said, his voice energetic and full of cheer earning the attention of their other two roommates. "Bowling today. Truce?"

The redhead sighed, but nodded. "Yeah, for Botan."

Hiei's brow quirked at the unusual exchange. That was probably the most words he had heard Kuwabara ever say to the dark-haired teenager, and Hiei wondered what Botan had to do with anything. Yusuke turned to face Hiei and Kurama. "You guys are welcome to join us too," he stated.

Kurama smiled politely. "What is the occasion?"

Kuwabara smiled beside himself. "Today is Botan's birthday," he told them. "I can't believe my baby sister is eighteen."

Hiei's eyes widened with the new information. It was surprising that Botan hadn't mentioned her birthday, but it was even more surprising that she was just turning eighteen. He looked to Kuwabara who seemed to understand his unspoken question. "Our parents started her in school a year early. She was three when she was ready for pre-K."

"Hn," Hiei replied before crossing his arms and looking to Yusuke. "What time?"

Yusuke grinned. "Whatever time I can get Botan out of her apartment."

* * *

When Botan had come out of her room, she had made herself some breakfast and then hid out in her room working on songs she had begun writing herself. Working with Hiei had inspired her to write lyrics every so often, though she wasn't sure if she'd ever show anyone these works. No, she planned to focus solely on her piano.

Yukina had knocked on her door around lunchtime, and so Botan ate lunch with her friend. The teal-haired girl never had any idea that it was Botan's birthday, well…not until Yusuke stopped by.

Botan had known Yusuke would want to take her out with her brother, but he hadn't expected him to invite Yukina. She learned that he had even invited Kurama and Hiei, and she paled. She wasn't ready to face Hiei yet.

Yusuke had driven Botan and Yukina to a bowling alley, and Botan felt an overwhelming wave of nostalgia. It had been so long since she had gone bowling, not since a time where she, Yusuke, and Keiko were all still friends. She had pushed that down, deciding to enjoy the day despite her emotions. Maybe allowing herself to celebrate wouldn't be so bad.

Of course, she hadn't expected Hiei to be there, and she instantly felt dread when his eyes landed on her. Yusuke must have invited him, she realized, and part of her was glad Hiei was there. On the other hand, she had hoped for a day away from him to try to work through her feelings for him. There had to be a way for her to push them so easily aside as he could, and she hoped to figure it out soon.

Many times during the games did Hiei try to approach Botan. Each time, she avoided him. Still, Hiei wasn't one to give up. Eventually, he was able to corner Botan alone, and he asked if they could talk later at her place about something. Botan wanted to say "no." She wanted to ignore all of this, but Hiei's eyes held little room for argument, so she was forced to agree albeit reluctantly. All day she had avoided him and made excuses not to talk to him, but she no longer had a good reason to say "no."

So, Hiei went with Botan and Yukina back to the apartment and followed Botan to her room. He closed the door behind him so they could have their privacy. Hiei knew Botan was feeling jumpy and uncomfortable. Part of him felt responsible. His callous words weeks before were the cause of this reaction. "I want you to forget what I said the last time we were here reading lines."

Botan looked visibly shocked and confused. "W…What do you mean?"

Hiei's eyes narrowed. "You know what I mean. About the kiss. I shouldn't have said that kissing means nothing."

"Hiei, I don't understand what you're getting at…"

Hiei looked to her, and Botan immediately silenced. "The past couple of weeks, since that moment, you been acting nervous around me and distant. I had hoped my words to be a help to you. I didn't expect them to upset you. That was how it was explained to me, and it helped when I started out in acting. I should have realized, though, that for you it seemed inconsiderate of your feelings."

Botan blushed profusely and looked away. So, Hiei thought that she was mad at him for his explanation… That made her feel terrible. He wasn't the reason she was acting this way. Well, he sort of was, but not directly. He had thought he was being callous, but if she were a normal person maybe that explanation would have affected her differently, much like it affected him when he was younger. Normally, his words would be a help. It was her mind that distorted her feelings and turned the kiss into something more when it wasn't. "It's okay, Hiei. Actually, it was the best explanation you could have given to anyone," she tried to assure him, her voice and posture still tight and strange. "Really, I wasn't offended in the least. You don't have to worry."

"You still seem uncomfortable," Hiei pointed out, though he knew the reason. Still, he wouldn't call her out on her tumultuous feelings. She needed to sort through them on her own much like he did. "Tell me what I can do to make you comfortable again. Don't think I didn't notice the fact that you were avoiding me all day."

Botan's head dropped in shame. She hadn't meant to be so obvious or to make Hiei think he did anything wrong. It was unfortunate, but she would need to tell him that it was because she developed these confused feelings for him. It wasn't fair to her friend that she was so flighty. She took a deep breath, trying to catch her nerve before she spoke to him. "Hiei…"

In that moment, Botan's phone rang. A sigh escaped her as she shook her head and then regarded Hiei with a smile. "Excuse me, but I need to take this."

"Hn," Hiei grunted in acknowledgement, nodding. Botan took that moment to leave the room, her soft voice and "hello" reaching his ears before she shut the door behind her.

Strangely aware that this was the first time he was alone in her room, Hiei decided to take a glance around. The place was very neat and tidy except for her desk which was surrounded by different books. He walked over and decided to take a look finding an ordinary composition book on the deck. His curiosity got the better of him, and he picked up the book to look through it noticing that it was their songbook. Hiei grinned as he looked through some of the songs they had completed, well, only the lyrics. Botan still had to write up the instrumental scores.

He continued to flip through the pages before he came across another set of lyrics. His brows furrowed. This was new to him. He and Botan hadn't worked on another new song, and yet she had written a page of new lyrics. As he started to read through them, he realized that whatever it was, it was not meant for his show.

 _The daughter's father watches, quietly we assume  
He's no longer with us, but he left this dusty room_

 _And your name and it's an honor  
It's a shame but it's your honor  
To take it on your shoulder  
'Till you can find another_

Hiei grimaced as he read for it seemed like the lyrics reflected someone grieving for the loss of their father. He knew that wasn't too far off the mark for Botan had confided in him that she lost her parents at a young age. He could empathize. In a way, his play was a way for him to face the loss. Maybe, she was doing the same in her songwriting. As the thought hit him, he thought about the song they finished together, how it became so solemn, before he continued reading.

 _That's enough for now  
He should have never left you broken  
He should have held you  
Things your father never could do  
That's enough for now  
He would have never left you broken  
He would have held you  
Things your father never told you_

It seemed like Botan held some hidden resentment toward the death of her parents, like she needed to be taught something she couldn't understand. She had been young when her parents died leaving her in the care of her older siblings who had probably had been children themselves, or had just hit adulthood. Where Hiei had suffered far worse after his mother died, he at least had street smarts and enough knowledge of how the world really was to help prepare him. Botan was naïve, much like his mother had been. It didn't mean that she wasn't wise or knowledgeable, but she could have been easily taken advantage of if she had lived the life he had. It was a miracle she was the person she was with little parental guidance. At least he knew from their talks that his roommate was supportive of his sister. According to Botan, he was one of the only ones. _  
_

 _The century before you, never could turn twenty-one  
Years and years he waited, just watching for a son  
Someone to go ahead, to take the name instead  
Years and years he waited, and a daughter came instead_

Hiei wasn't sure what to make of the line. Each line reflected something specific that he knew Botan would be feeling, but the remark confused him. Where her parents had been supportive, had they wanted another son and put that on Botan. That didn't make any sense to Hiei, but what did make sense to him was that a part of Botan felt she did not belong. He wondered if it had anything to do with the other sisters Botan mentioned. He wouldn't be able to ask her that. That was too personal, and he wasn't about to tell her he read her songbook without permission.

 _But_ _b_ _reathing comes in pairs  
Except for twice  
One begins and one's goodbye_

 _Sixty years of sorrow, he got five or six of bliss  
Left my mothers' mother  
Without so much as a kiss_

 _But that's enough for now  
He never wanted to leave you broken  
He would have held you  
Things your father never told you  
That's enough for now  
I would have never left you broken  
I would have held you  
Words your father never told you_

Botan returned to the room, and Hiei hurriedly set the notebook back on the desk where he found it. He looked to the woman, intent on finishing their previous conversations while trying to banish the emotional and heart-wrenching song he had just read from his mind. Of course, Botan wasn't willing to return to the conversation, instead asking, "Could we talk another day? I'm just feeling a bit sleepy."

"Bullshit," Hiei called out, shocking Botan. She staggered a bit as she walked into the room, looking at him with wide eyes. His narrowed at hers, not buying her earlier claim. "You were fine just a minute ago." Crimson eyes shifted to her phone, glaring heatedly at it. "What happened?"

Botan opened her mouth to reply, but, like last time, her phone rang causing the woman to growl in frustration. She went out into the hall, Hiei following closely behind her. "Ugh, I just want to be left alone," she hissed before answering the phone. "Shizuru, what?" There was silence on their end, though Hiei could hear a muffled, muted voice on the other end. Botan scoffed at whatever was being said to her. "I didn't just hang up on her," Botan defended. "Ruka was saying horrible things and I didn't want to hear it anymore." Hiei's eyes softened for a moment before his expression was neutral. He probably wasn't supposed to be hearing this.

The conversation didn't seem to be getting any better. Hiei could see tears forming in Botan's eyes. The woman on the phone, Shizuru, was probably scolding her for, what Hiei assumed, Botan hanging up on her other sister. What did it matter? It was Botan's birthday, and if the other girl was being petty, Botan didn't need to deal with it. Botan had made the right call in Hiei's mind, and he didn't even know what was going on. "It wasn't just 'mean words,'" Botan declared, her voice cracking. "Just leave me alone. You never defend me anymore, and I'm just done with all of you."

Botan hung up the phone and nearly tossed it back into her room as she slid down to the floor, crying in the hallway. A pang struck Hiei at the sight of the woman sobbing so hard. It reminded him too much of the past, of his mother and Yukina, and so much more. He could almost feel the pain as she screamed out her sorrow, and he had no idea what to do for the woman.

As a child, Hiei found himself comforting his mother simply by walking into her room as asking if she was okay, or even just silently moving to hug her. It was different. His mother always said that her kids were her joy, so just seeing them or holding them would make her day better. Hiei and Botan did not have that kind of connection, but he had still taken it upon himself to be her friend and confidant. Well, it was more like Botan had done that for him first, and then he reciprocated, but still...he wanted to help. Her tears were only serving to make him feel uncomfortable.

Hiei moved to sit beside her, reaching out to place a hand on her shoulder to offer his support, but, the second he touched Botan, she pushed him away and got up to storm into her room, slamming the door for good measure. At that moment, Yukina came out of her room, her mouth gaping before it settled into a firm line. She looked to her baffled brother and sighed. "I take it she spoke to her sisters?"

"How did you know?" Hiei asked abruptly. If his sister could tell just from this, was this common?

"She gets like this every time she speaks to them," Yukina explained, "maybe not the sobbing, but she always feels awful after."

"Why?" The question left his lips beside himself, and he clamped his mouth shut as soon as the words were spoken.

Yukina shook her head solemnly. "Her sisters are not the nicest," she informed him. "Her youngest is a sweetheart, but the others…they just call to harass her and say awful things to her, and when she gets fed up and hangs up, her oldest sister always calls back to berate her and makes her feel worse."

Hiei frowned, his mouth filled with a bitter taste as he swallowed and clenched his fist in anger. Botan had said that her sisters tore her down, but it seemed like there was more to it than that. "How awful?" he questioned.

Yukina's eyes wavered, and she couldn't even look her brother in the eye after that. Hiei was starting to grow concerned. Yukina was not the type to be bothered unless something was truly awful. She was clearly concerned for the blue-haired woman that had somehow become friends with them both. Something wasn't right, and Hiei wanted to know what it was.

"As…as awful as what Rui's mother said about you…"

It took everything Hiei had not to react to his sister's claims, and even more to keep him from punching the wall. His grandmother had been a bitch, and no one else could compare save the mother of his mother's best friend. When Hina had died, Rui had planned on taking both children in, and she was happy to do that for her deceased friend. Unfortunately, she still lived with her mother, constantly looking for work, and her mother had no desire for Hiei to live with them.

The vile woman had said, right in front of Hiei and Yukina, that Hiei didn't belong in the world and didn't even look like his mother or sister. The young boy hadn't known why that mattered, and he definitely didn't know what she was implying until she had said that Hina must have picked up a stray and that he was nothing but trouble and a waste of space.

It didn't matter to Hiei when he learned much later that the woman had had problems with men all her life and hated them all, even the children. He didn't care that the woman had told Rui to apologize to him before she died. All that Hiei remembered of the woman was her callousness and evil. He did not blame Rui for any of it. He knew Yukina needed her. The fact that Rui had given him up and kept Yukina because her mother would only give support for one of them had left Hiei feel bitter towards the old woman, but never to Rui or his sister.

If Yukina was comparing what Botan's sisters said to that evil bitch, then it truly was dire. He looked back to Botan's room listening to her pain sobs, his expression softening from his neutral exterior. She didn't deserve any of those words, and her sisters were nothing but petty witches.

"I'm going to go and make her some tea," Yukina spoke, interrupting his thoughts. "That's all I really can offer her when she's this upset."

His twin walked away, going to perform her task leaving Hiei alone in the hall to listen to Botan. This wasn't what the girl needed on her birthday, to be this upset over such a vicious attack. He had to do or say something.

He was about to knock on the door, but froze with his fist midair. He didn't know _what_ to say. These were battles he struggled with inside himself, and his mind just went blank. His fist dropped back down to his side before Hiei turned to leave. He could only leave the apartment, not knowing what he could do for the woman. He was helpless in this situation.

Maybe he'd know what to say the next time they'd meet up.

* * *

The rest of the weekend flew by, though Hiei spent most of it thinking about Botan. He had overheard Kuwabara on the night of her birthday talking to that same woman, Shizuru, who was telling him he needed to talk to Botan and get her in line. Kuwabara didn't seemed to agree, and he even stated to the woman that she doesn't know the kinds of things he's overheard the girls calling her. He told Shizuru to just leave Botan alone before he said "goodbye." The redhead's eyes landed on Hiei who had just been staring at him. Kuwabara had known that Hiei was with Botan and probably hoped for an explanation, but Hiei didn't have one to give and made a hasty retreat to his room. He hardly left it Sunday.

Monday, though, he and Botan normally met to write some songs or practice, so he raced over there. In his mind, he was already planning on not doing anything except trying to speak with Botan about her birthday. He didn't like the situation his costar was in, nor did he like how he handled it. Knowing firsthand what Botan was suffering, Hiei felt he should have said something instead of running away. That was truthfully what he had done. He still didn't know how to deal with a crying woman, but that was his problem. He should have stayed until she calmed and given her the advice he had come up with over the weekend.

 _Screw them_.

It was two simple words, watered down from what had originally entered his mind, and Botan needed to hear them. He knew that the woman was too kindhearted to agree with his statement, but she needed to walk away from them. They were toxic. It would not get any better. She didn't need the negativity. It would only drag her down. She was strong enough to rise above it. She had the skills that had saved him from living a life on a street. In his mind, Botan was better than them, and she would live a good life despite them.

She simply needed support.

She had her brother, her best friend, his sister, and, yes, she had him too, in a way. He still didn't plan on being there for her more than a friend, but a woman like Botan, like his mother ages before, needed to know that they weren't alone. Botan deserved to have what his mother did not, a support system.

When Hiei looked at the clock and saw that it was passed the usual time they usually met, Hiei grew concerned. Botan had only been late one time before, and that was when she had found the song for one of their scenes. Knowing how her birthday turned out, Hiei knew it wasn't that simple. He decided to text her and wait a little longer, but after another half hour, he received no response.

There was a feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach that Hiei could not explain. He decided to contact Yukina to see if she had seen Botan that morning. The feeling grew when his sister expressed her surprise that Botan wasn't with Hiei. She had seen the woman leave that morning around the same time she normally did. Wariness crept upon Hiei as he tried to figure out where the woman could be.

Something compelled him to go to Botan's and Yukina's apartment. He hoped that Botan had returned there and that this feeling was was unwarranted. Unfortunately, when he got there, he realized that he was completely justified in his concern.

Hiei had knocked on the door only to get no response. As he turned to lean on the door, he noticed something of suspect through the blinds. He crouched down in front of the window, eyes widening when he saw a pool of blue. Botan was lying on the ground, unmoving.

Panicked, Hiei called Yukina over, managing to keep his cool but sweating profusely due to his nerves. Yukina had raced out of her class to let Hiei into the apartment. The two practically ran inside, Hiei kneeling beside Botan who was passed out on the floor. He released a breath of relief when he heard her ragged breathing. When he had seen her lying motionless through the blinds it reminded him of a scene from his past, one that he would never forget, and his blood ran cold. Thankfully, Botan was okay, for the most part. She was clearly sick, her face red and heated. He reached out to push the hair out of her face. She felt like she was burning.

The sink could be heard, and Hiei figured Yukina was getting a cold rag for Botan. Meanwhile, he attempted to wake her up. Botan started to stir for a moment, her voice weak, and in her delirious state she called out for her brother. "Kazuma?"

Hiei scoffed a laugh, grinning weakly. "Try again," he murmured.

Botan managed to open her hazy eyes to see. "Hiei?"

The teenager nodded and moved to help her sit up, Botan's arms buckled beneath her. "What happened?" he asked her. She didn't answer him, though. Instead, Botan shook her head and buried herself against him, Hiei's cheeks tinted pink over the action before he was able to regain his stoic expression. He rested a hand against her back just as Yukina entered the room with the cold cloth. Hiei took it from her and pressed it to Botan's forehead, the woman gasping out in relief. "Get another one for her neck," Hiei ordered his sister gently. Yukina nodded and watched as her brother embraced Botan so that he could pick her up off the floor. She smiled, watching Hiei carry Botan to her room. She knew he wasn't one to just do that for anyone. Botan was in good hands for now, so Yukina went to get what her brother had asked for, leaving the two alone.

In Botan's room, Hiei set her on the small couch since her bed was so high off the ground. Putting her up there would not be conducive for either him or his sister nursing her. He couldn't help but wonder how she had gotten so sick in just a couple of days. When he asked her about it, Botan explained that she had been feeling under the weather the majority of the week, but she hadn't been fully sick. She hadn't been sleeping much for the past couple of weeks, just like Hiei had not been able to sleep being consumed with thoughts of her. The previous night, though, was the worst. Botan hadn't slept at all the entire weekend except in small bouts. Her phone conversation with her sisters had hit her hard, and that angered Hiei. Botan was making herself sick because of them. "I know what they said about you," Hiei spoke cautiously.

Botan seemed surprised, but then she tried to hide under the covers. "Then you know that I'm the freak of my family."

Hiei's brow quirked at that, the song he read the night of her birthday coming to mind. "What?"

"I don't look like them," Botan whispered, "so Ruka and Juri always say I'm adopted. The only characteristic I share with anyone is with Juri. We both have similar hair color, though hers is green and mine is blue. In every other way, I'm different, even my complexion. Kazuma always tells me he was there the day I was born, and he was so excited to get another little sister. But…Ruka says other things too. She keeps throwing my past back into my face among other things, and I just can't take it."

Botan was getting herself worked up again to the point where she was going to start crying. Hiei knew that couldn't happen or Botan would have even more difficulty breathing. He placed his hand on her arm, bringing her attention directly to him. She watched him curiously, and he took that moment to say, "I know how you feel?"

"Huh?"

Hiei scoffed and glared down at the couch in front of him. "You aren't the only one who's heard crap like that," he told her. "The woman who cast me out, telling her daughter she could only take one of us, said I looked nothing like my mother or sister. Yukina and I share eye color, and nothing else. Our mother…I didn't look anything like her. Between my grandmother and Rui's mother, I heard it all. That I looked too much like my father, that I was a waste of space that shouldn't exist. It's because of people like them that I have little desire to trust anyone. I'd prefer not to care what others say about me."

Botan looked at Hiei through bleary eyes, stunned that he would confide any of that in her. She wanted to reach out and comfort him, but Yukina came into the room with another cloth. Hiei took it from his sister and thanked her, Yukina smiling and leaving the room. Botan almost started up the conversation again, but Hiei had taken the cloth to rub the skin of her neck. Her eyes closed, a soft sigh escaping her, as she laid her head down on her couch pillow. She opened her eyes again, amethyst connecting with crimson, the two remaining silent but contented. Hiei then moved to take Botan's hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"They're wrong."

Hiei stood up to leave the room and allow Botan to get the rest she needed, though he had shocked her with his words. She tried to form a coherent thought, but her sickness made it impossible. Instead, she decided to allow herself to relax with the cold rags on her. She was able to fall asleep almost instantly.

* * *

A couple of hours had passed, and Yukina was only mildly surprised that her brother had not yet left. He had done his part, coming to check on Botan, and then making sure she was okay and safe resting. There was nothing more he could really do, yet he was still there and waiting. The pensive gaze he wore made Yukina smile. She had never seen her brother this lost in thought. She smiled, and then walked over to him. Hiei was snapped out of his daze when she approached, and he eyed her warily. "You know," she started, "you could leave if you want." Hiei did not budge, not did he even acknowledge her remark. "Are you worried?"

As an answer, Hiei shook his head. "I just wanted to make sure she's okay," he explained, making his sisters grin widen. "What?"

"Botan will be fine," she assured him. "Remember, brother, that I took care of you when you were sick…back in high school, remember?"

Hiei did remember. It had been shortly after they had been reunited. Rui had taken him in, and the twins were able to attend the same high school. He had been on his own for so long that, when he got the flu, he wanted to be left alone and was reluctant to let anyone help him. Yukina, though, refused to let him suffer alone. He had fought Yukina at first, reminding her that he could care for himself like he always did, but she had told him that was the reason she was taking over. She knew he would have done the same for her, and she was right. It had been the first time he had let someone take care of him since his mother had been there. He knew that Botan would be in capable hands, but that did not make him want to leave.

Yukina could tell that Hiei still didn't want to leave, so she decided to keep him there a bit longer. "Why don't I make some tea, and you can bring a cup to Botan while I work on making us all some soup for dinner?"

Hiei nodded, trying to play it off. "Only because you asked," he grunted. But both he and Yukina knew the truth. Hiei actually did want to check on Botan again.

He found her asleep, which was a good thing, and moved to sit by her placing the hot cup of tea on the small night table. Out of nowhere, Botan seemed to be tossing and turning. The fever was probably causing the woman to have a nightmare. He could only watch as she struggled, but then her motions started to relax, and instead she started speaking. Hiei could hear her muttering Yusuke's name and someone named Keiko. Now that Hiei thought about it, he remembered hearing Yusuke speak to a Keiko…his girlfriend, perhap? By this point, Botan was getting upset in her sleep, so Hiei attempted to wake her, calling her name. He did not get the result he wanted. Rather, Botan started moaning and crying in her sleep. This time, he lightly shook her arm. She needed to wake up, the sobbing causing her already ragged breathing to turn to coughs.

Botan finally came to, but she merely stared at Hiei like he was some sort of apparition. "Hey," he spoke quietly. "What was all that about?"

It was his hope that she would talk to him about her nightmare, but she refused the advance and continued to stare at him. He scoffed derisively before reaching for the cup of tea. "Here, drink this," he demanded. "Yukina's made it." Well, that part was obvious since his sister usually made Botan tea. "She's also making soup."

"She doesn't have to do that," Botan mumbled into the cup. "I've tried to tell her that before."

"Hm," Hiei murmured. "She does that. So…want to tell me what you were dreaming?" Botan turned her head away, ignoring him which honestly pissed Hiei off. He didn't ask again, sitting there feeling angry as he let Botan drink her tea. Eventually, he got tired of the silence and sighed in frustration, asking, "Who is Keiko?"

He regretted asking when Botan's eyes cut through him. The woman's reaction looked as if he he had slapped her in the face, and so he knew he had crossed a line. His expression grew grim, his lips pressing into a firm line as Botan hugged herself. She put the tea down on the night table before sighing quite loudly. "I never wanted to talk to you about this," she admitted. "It will change how you see me, and I'm not ready for that yet."

"Let me be the judge of that," Hiei countered. "I highly doubt my opinion will change. Who is Keiko?"

"Yusuke's girlfriend," she confirmed before adding, "and she used to be my best friend."

"Used to?" Hiei repeated.

Botan nodded forlornly. "We were young, and Yusuke and Keiko had gotten into a fight. Yusuke was struggling at home and started skipping school. Keiko gave him a hard time, not knowing that his mother had been drinking a lot. Yusuke had been so torn up that he came to be because he knew I would listen, but he was also mad at Keiko, so when he asked me out to the diner, I thought we were getting some food, and I listened to everything he had been going through.

"Yusuke had actually asked me there because he wanted to get back at Keiko." Hiei's eyes narrowed slightly. "He went back on his plan, but he had just been so overwhelmed by emotion and thankful that I had actually been there for him that he kissed me, and Keiko happened to show up then. That led to her and I not being friends anymore. Ruka had told Keiko that I had liked Yusuke, but that had been when we were kids, a small crush that disappeared when I saw him as a second brother.

"Anyway," she continued, "Yusuke and Keiko ended up getting together, but Keiko hates me. She hates that we're still friends, and that's why she doesn't even know I'm going here with Kazuma and Yusuke. If she knew, it would be bad…"

"I take it that's the past your sisters keep bringing up," Hiei stated.

Botan nodded sadly. "Ruka calls me a homewrecker. That's probably the nicest thing I've been called by her and our classmates regarding all of this. Kazuma always says I'm not responsible, but it's because of me that we aren't all friends anymore. Yusuke and Kazuma used to be so close, but now… It's all my fault. I never wanted you to know because I didn't want you to know what kind of person I was. I'm a monster."

Hiei felt his blood boil with rage when he heard Botan degrade herself like that. "You are not a monster," he countered, "and you are not responsible for any of this. You keep pushing aside the part where all you thought you were doing was helping out a friend. Did you intend for him to kiss you?"

"Not, but I-"

"And we're you purposefully trying to hurt this Keiko person?"

"Of course not," she gaped. "I would never…"

"You only thought you were offering comfort, and because of this simple misunderstanding that no one else seems to want to listen to you were and are insulted and reviled everywhere you go." His eyes grew stern as he admitted, "I remember what that was like. I told you what those women thought of me, and it was worse the time I spent on my own. I was the loner, the abandoned child no one seemed to want, but it didn't matter. It doesn't matter what anyone else says, Botan. Everyone is wrong about us, and we're going to prove it together."

He took her hand, and Botan blinked, perplexed. Hiei only smirked at the woman, gripping her hand and raising the adjoined appendages up in some sort of arm-linked victory pose. "We'll show them," Hiei reiterated. "We've been doing a good job so far."

Botan couldn't help but smile at Hiei. Never during the time she had known him did she ever think he would listen to her story with such patience, not had she expected him to take her side in her drama. No matter what others had told her, Botan still blamed herself. Right now, though, she felt like she really wasn't alone for the first time. She gripped Hiei's hand with equal power, and the two, in that moment, were a fully united front.

They would prove all the others wrong, together, just like Hiei had said.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the songs "Counting Stars" by OneRepublic, "Glory" by Jim Brickman (which is a song Botan will simply be playing on the piano), "City of a Hill" by Casting Crowns, or "Kiss Me Slowly" by Parachute. Yup, lots of music in this chapter. ^_^

* * *

As a child, Botan had always enjoys going to see plays to see the orchestra with her parents and siblings. Those experiences had caused her to develop love for music, playing the piano especially. Her parents had always been supportive, hiring her a piano teacher when she was young. She had excelled quickly, and the instructor had nothing left to teach her. He had "graduated" her the year before her parents had passed away. The piano was one of the few things that helped her to be productive after they died.

Though she had mastered the art of playing the piano as a child, she wasn't a true composer, but she wanted to be. She wanted to write music that could convey emotions to others, bring them out. Being an empath, she sure as anything felt enough from other people. She didn't know how to go about doing any of it, though, and Shizuru and Kazuma were busy trying to hold the family together taking care of all of the girls. Botan had been on her own, but she told her best friends about her dreams.

Both Keiko and Yusuke had supported her desires. Keiko had bought her some books about music and the art of composing. Yusuke had other ideas, more…delinquent ideas. He had actually helped her sneak into a college class. He taught her to act like she belonged there even though she was only fourteen. Eventually they got found out, and her sister had grounded her, but she had already started the basics.

At school, there was a special music class where she could play the piano. At auditions, she played something she had been working on diligently by herself, and the teacher noticed that it was not a published tune. To the dismay of other students, Botan was selected for the class along with a few others. In addition, she took a music theory class that really helped her perfect her technique.

Kazuma continued to support her, and Hinageshi always loved hearing her play. Shizuru had grown indifferent to her and never came to her recitals. It had been disappointing. The woman _used to_ support her, after all. Rukh had simply made fun of her, always laughing at her songs as she practiced, never appreciating the fine arts like she did. She believed Botan was deluding herself, told her she was a talentless fool and that no one would ever see her for more than the homewrecker she was.

Hiei did.

As surprising as that seemed, the man who had detested her so much the first time he met her had become her partner and confidant. They didn't sit around talking about their problems, but after learning just a bit more on both their parts they had an understanding. Hiei knew about her home life, or part of it, and about what happened between her and her two friends, and, likewise, Botan knew that Hiei had suffered from prejudice that had prevented him from growing up with his sister. That was all they really knew, and hardly any of details. When they hung out, they usually sat in silence, rehearsed, played some freestyle on Botan's keyboard, or actually conversed about their classes.

Prior to all of this, it had been made clear to Botan that Hiei had had a preconceived notion of the type of person he expected her to be. He hadn't originally seen anything in her because of a label, or more like bad rumors of the kind of people in her town. When he had admitted as much, Botan actually laughed and agreed saying that her sister, Ruka, was probably responsible for a majority of the rumors. Hiei had scoffed at that muttering something sarcastic like "and she's the one who calls you a homewrecker."

Hiei had been able to see who she really was through her music, and he had found himself developing a strange friendship with the woman. _That_ was what Botan loved most about music, that one could convey so many emotions and parts of him or herself through their work. She felt that way towards Hiei, too. Botan felt like she had learned a lot about Hiei through his play. Though she had heard of him originally from music magazines, she had never had the privilege of seeing him work. Now, she got to see him in action, experiencing the sensations herself.

It had been so surreal to see a man who concealed all emotions wear so many expressions. The way his eyes softened as he took on the role of his character, the torrent of emotions he conveyed in his every movement…Botan could see why he was so famous in the thespian world. He was nothing short of magnificent, and she had been sure to let him know that. The woman could have sworn she saw his cheeks redden that day despite his stoic façade. He was truly a conundrum.

Rehearsals had become even grander now that the set was coming together, and especially because Hiei and Botan were on the same wavelength. They shared much of their time together now, and fell into a rhythm with each other. There were still so many mysteries about them shrouded in silence, but it was starting to feel like during their rehearsals, practices, and songwriting, it was just the two of them against it all.

She had been watching his scene with due diligence. It was getting closer and closer to fall break, and they had nearly rehearsed the entire show at least once through. Some days, he didn't have her come to rehearsal, focusing on his other performers. Honestly, he never had a complaint about how she performed. She wondered if he saw her the same way she saw him, when she performed, but she really didn't have the courage to ask him yet.

" _You've been doing well these last few weeks,"_ Preston's father stated. _"No missed meetings, making business deals and money. It's like you've become a different person, son. What changed?"_

Preston scoffed and shook his head when the man called him "son." There was truly no relationship between the two. _"You tell me. Maybe I've finally gotten over that sham of an engagement. Maybe I'm actually happy with life right now because I'm free of the albatross you set me up with."_ His answer made the man fume. _"And maybe, just maybe, I actually care for the first time."_

His father was skeptical upon seeing the look of reflection on the man's face. _"Preston, have you met someone?"_

" _No,"_ Preston lied, _"and if I did, you'd be the last to know."_

" _You're still a disrespectful little shit,"_ the CEO hissed. _"Fine, then. Just know, whoever it is, they would not be welcomed, not unless I approve."_

" _I wouldn't care about your approval,"_ Preston countered, looking out the window. _"I would do whatever I want."_

" _You talk tough, brat, but remember that in the future. You could never make your own way. You'll only ever live in my shadow."_

The actor playing Preston's father left the stage, Preston still staring out the window. Once he was alone, he smirked sardonically and chuckled. _"Bastard,"_ he spoke in amusement. _"He knows nothing about me."_

But Hope did. This was the part of the play that had followed a segment of Preston and Hope meeting so much in secret, unbeknownst to Preston's parents. He had appeared much happier that both patriarchs noticed a change in their son. Having more joy and energy in his life, Preston had become one of the top tycoons at the company, and he was becoming a more public name. Part of it was to appease his bastard of a father, but the other part was to distract himself from reality. He was still upset that Hope was betrothed to another, but he still planned to keep seeing her in hopes that they'd be able to be together and be happy. Perhaps, if he put all his energy into work and became the top businessman, he could insert himself and break off Hope's engagement. Her mother would only want her promised to a rich family. With him making a name for himself in the business world, maybe even her mother would be happy.

Shortly after he finished the dialogue portion of the scene, light music started playing, and Botan's attention was solely on Hiei. He didn't seem like the person to sing, but his voice was always soft and amazing, and very relaxing. _"Lately, I've been, I've been losing sleep,"_ he sang quietly, _"dreaming about the things that we could be."_

He leaned back against the windowsill of the set, crossing his arms dipping his chin downwards while looking pensive, _"But baby, I've been, I've been praying hard, said no more counting dollars. We'll be counting stars. Yeah, we'll be counting…stars."_

The music took off becoming more fast-paced and the scenery changed revealing a living city, many people walking as sardines on the streets, light on Hiei as he looks around observing the colorless masses. _"I see this life like a swinging vine, swing my heart across the line, and my face is flashing signs. Seek it out and ye shall find."_ The lights started flashing to mimic the flashing signs of the city.

And then the light stayed straight blue as Hiei pulled himself out of the crowd. _"Old, but I'm not that old, young, but I'm not that bold, and I don't think the world is sold. I'm just doing what I'm told._

" _I feel something so right doing the wrong thing, and I feel something so wrong doing the right thing,"_ was the line that described his sneaking around with Hope, feeling completely right and at ease while doing his supposed duty felt wrong, and he was growing sick of the business world. It was only a means to an end for him to get Hope in the long run. _"I could lie, couldn't I, could lie…_

" _Everything that kills me makes me feel alive."_

As the refrain repeated twice more, a select few of the city folk were being hit with the colored lights, all a different color in darkness of the stage. The lights then all centered on Hiei once again as he sang about the feelings Preston had for his lover before he was thrown into a boring, company building. _"I feel the love and I feel it burn down this river, every turn. 'Hope' is a four-letter word… Make that money, watch it burn."_

" _Old,"_ the background dancers sang, to which Hiei answered, _"but I'm not that old."_ They sang again, _"Young."_

" _But I'm not that bold,"_ Hiei responded. _"I don't think the world is sold. I'm just doing what we're told…_

" _I feel something so wrong doing the right thing…"_

The background dancers sang, _"He could lie, could lie, could lie!"_

Preston's response was a smirk as he jumped from the building just a small ways into a blue light signifying water singing, _"Everything that drowns me makes me wanna fly."_

His background dancers sang the refrain twice again in place of Hiei as the scene changed and had 'Preston' meeting with many boards, making deals, raising money with paper money flying down everywhere he walked. As he passed the makeshift houses prop, he was being noticed by all of these people, including women who were starting to try to introduce themselves as he casually strode passed them, effectively ignoring them making his unattainable persona attract others even more. As this was going on, the background dancers disappeared into the crowd repeating the phrase, _"Take that money; watch it burn. Sink in the river, the lessons are learned,"_ over and over until it was nothing more than a whisper as Hiei looked towards a mansion, Hope's home, and glared at it hoping to be able to get Hope out of there some day.

The scene continued, though Botan needed to get back to what she had been doing. Truthfully, she was not supposed to be at rehearsal that day. She had told Hiei she needed to finish a song and submit a few songs to her advisor that day. Hiei, now having become friendlier with Botan and more understanding towards her needs, allowed her to skip rehearsal. Of course, Koto noticed. Botan had snuck in and had seen Hiei stand up for her to the woman telling her if she continued to harass him about her costar, she wouldn't even be an understudy. That shut Koto up really quickly.

Botan had needed a break, so she came to check on things as a break. Hiei had handled everyone there so well, and she was, as always, impressed. It was fun watching him perform knowing that she didn't have to go up there. It was like seeing one of Hiei's plays as an onlooker. It was nice.

She noticed that Hiei purposefully avoided scenes they would need to run together, probably avoiding having to work with Koto even a little bit. Botan didn't know this, but honestly Hiei was trying to avoid another incident where the woman had forced herself on him, forcing him to kiss her. No, he did _not_ want that happening again. In his mind, after all, he'd never use her in his show, not ever.

* * *

Much later, after Hiei had been fully content with the scenes he and the other performers rehearsed, he headed towards Yukina's and Botan's appointment. Truthfully, he had gotten used to going there in the evenings to see his sister and Botan. They ate much better than he and his roommates, and so Yukina encouraged him to come. She also told him to invite the others, but Hiei preferred to visit them alone. He was sure Yukina could see through that.

As crazy as it sounded, the time he spent with Botan at the apartment was different than they time they spent at the school. Both of them became so laidback in each other's presence, and Hiei wanted to continue to feel it. The woman was actually…fun to be around. He should have seen that much earlier, but his mannerisms of keeping people at a distance would not let him see it. Now, his guard was down, but only around these two women. At first, if bothered him, but he didn't mind now. He felt like he was slowly changing, and he was at war with himself on whether or not it was a good or a bad thing.

Yukina had let him in and attempted to make small talk with him. He answered her usual questions, listened to her, and grunted out answers before he asked where Botan was. His twin smiled knowingly at him causing him to raise a brow her. He wasn't sure if he liked that look on his sister's face, his eyes narrowing slightly. "Well?"

"Botan is in her room," Yukina told her. "She's been very happy since she got back. I couldn't get her to tell me anything yet. I think she's waiting to tell you whatever it is."

"Hn," Hiei responded, going off to the room, and he could hear Botan playing one of the most jovial songs he had ever heard her play. A smirk appeared on his features. He could hear the mood Botan was in. He knocked, and then the tune stopped. Though that was slightly disappointing, Hiei didn't mind when Botan came to answer the door. She smiled widely at him, yanking him into the room. She was so excited. Hiei looked over to the keyboard and saw that the name of the tune she was playing had been called _"Victory."_

"Hiei," she called enthusiastically. He found her excitement charming, though he wouldn't admit it and buried the thought deep down inside himself. "I want you to hear something. I submitted this song earlier, and my advisor loved it. "My first lyrical piece all on my own."

The actor grinned smugly and nodded. "Play it."

Botan beamed at him, thankful for the support. He went to sit on her couch, and she turned back to her keyboard and began to play lightly before she started singing her new tune. _"'Did you hear of the city on the hill?' said one old man to the other. 'It once shined bright, and it would be shining still, but they all started turning on each other.'"_

Hiei listened intently as Botan's playing was soft and solemnly, matching the tone set by her words. Her voice was light and airy, passionate like the first time he had ever heard her, and he could tell that she worked very hard on this piece. He could only see her, the rest of the world disappearing to highlight her music. He felt like he was enchanted, and it didn't bother him that the woman had stolen his breath away. _"You see the poets thought the dancers were shallow, and the soldiers thought the poets were weak, and the elders saw the young ones as foolish, and the rich man never heard the poor man speak._

" _But one by one, they ran away, with their made up minds to leave it all behind, and the light began to fade in the city on the hill, the city on the hill…"_

Botan smiled as she continued to play feeling Hiei's attention solely on her, as if he was studying her. She could feel his interest and surprisingly his thrill. _"Each one thought that they knew better, but they were different by design. Instead of standing strong together they let their differences divide. And one by one, they ran away with their made up minds to leave it all behind, and the light began to fade in the city on the hill, the city on the hill…and the world it searching still…"_

She stopped playing to see Hiei watching her with a contented grin on his face. "So?" she asked. "Do you like it? I mean there's more, but…I want to know what you think so far."

"I'm impressed," he admitted, "that you wrote it all by yourself when you had no previous experience before working with me on the show. I think it's admirable that you are improving and working hard to meet your goals. You deserve to be excited."

Botan's happiness and thanks radiated from her, and her smile brightened. "Thank you," she replied. "I can play more for you, if you'd like."

"I would like that," Hiei agreed. "Also, if it's permitted, I would like to use the song for the play."

That surprised Botan. "Wh…What?" She couldn't have heard right, she decided.

He smirked. "You heard me," he told her. "I want you to play this in the show."

"But…why?" Botan questioned, becoming nervous. She thought about playing on stage as a different person with so many other actors and actresses watching her, and the thought was terrifying. "I'm…not sure if that's a good idea."

"Nonsense," Hiei countered. "You just have to play and sing it." He reached into his bag and pulled out his script, turning to a specific page, and pointed to a scene that was a scene between the two of them. "I can rewrite this scene between Preston and Hope where he would listen to her play. My mother was a musician. It will still fit."

Botan's eyes softened, her hand moving to Hiei's. He looked at their joined hands and then to Botan questioningly. She offered him a sad smile and nodded. "Okay," she agreed. "If it means that much to you, we'll do it."

Hiei silently nodded, still looking into her eyes. Something strange was happening, and he knew it the moment he thought about veering slightly from his parents' story and his script. He stared at her for a while, not speaking, and Botan started to grow nervous again. "Um…Hiei?" Her voice snapped him out of his trance, and he realized that he had been leaning in towards Botan and pulled back. "Is everything all right?"

"Maybe," he remarked, earning confusion. "I want to work on the scene now."

"Oh," Botan responded. "Are you leaving?"

"No," Hiei answered. "I want you to write it with me." Botan's eyes widened for a moment, and Hiei smirked at her. He knew that it would shock her, to allow her to write with him. To be honest, it felt natural. He had assisted her with her song one, and they basically worked on everything together now. "What do you say?"

Botan's smile was his answer, but she added a quiet, "Okay."

* * *

Rehearsing the new scene went well. Basically, only they really needed to worry about it, them and but a few background singers and the orchestra for the parts where they'd join Botan in playing, but they'd be in the background. They would only be a support to Botan's playing while she sang her heart out. _"But it was the rhythm of the dancers that gave the poets life. It was the spirit of the poets that gave the soldiers strength to fight. It was the fire of the young ones; it was the wisdom of the old; it was the story of the poor man that needed to be told."_

The music took over for a moment, and everyone in the theater. When they had all heard there would be changes to the script, many were skeptical and actually worried about what they could be, but it actually went well with the story. Preston had gone to meet Hope at her home while her mother was away on a trip, and they had been discussing her true dreams and desires, what she wanted to do. Preston wanted to hear her play, and, though she fought it, Hope gave in and played for him.

As Botan repeated the last line, there was one who disliked the change. Koto was annoyed when someone told her about the change. She had to grab someone else's copy. Apparently Hiei didn't see it necessary to send her a copy, and, even if he had, it would have made no difference. Koto had no idea how to play the piano. This was just another insult, and she felt his hatred for the blue-haired woman growing.

" _But, one by one, will we run away with our made up minds to leave it all behind as the light begins to fade in the city on the hill?"_ Botan sang, and Koto's eyes narrowed. The woman looked so free up there, and Hiei was way too close to her. It was different than when they kissed as per the script. It was like the two had a connection. They could have written the scene and song together, and that just wasn't fair.

The line bridged into Botan singing with the background singers, _"One by one, will we run away with our made up minds to leave it all behind as the light begin to fade in the city on the hill…the city on the hill…"_

The background dancers started singing the words, _"Come home,"_ in between Botan's next few lines.

" _And the Father's calling still,"_ Botan sang, her eyes meeting Hiei as her playing slowed and _"come home"_ echoed. _"To the city on the hill."_

" _Come home…"_

And the music faded, the rest of the scene continuing. _"That was amazing,"_ Preston said, taking the woman's hand. Botan looked down, surprised by the action. They really hadn't written out actions for the scene, agreeing to follow each other's lead. _"Why you haven't gone to school for this because why?"_

" _I already told you,"_ Hope argued, _"but my mother won't allow it."_

" _If someone heard you play, then I highly doubt your mother would be able to do anything to stop you,"_ Preston responded. _"There's always another way."_

Hope smiled sadly, but she still didn't agree. _"You don't know my mother."_

Preston smirked sardonically. _"If she's anything like my father, I do."_

Hope laughed at that and wiped away a tear. Botan knew Hiei would probably ask her about that later. She just felt awful for his parents in that moment and reacted. For now, him simply smiled at her, lacing their fingers together. They drew closer together before the phone in the house went off. Hope sighed, reluctantly pulling away from Preston as his eyes followed her reflecting his concern. _"Hello, mother,"_ she greeted. _"I trust the trip is going well."_

" _It would be going better if I hadn't gotten a call that you cancelled your date with Bryson,"_ the voice rang on the stage so that the audience would be able to hear. Preston couldn't hear though, and just remained staring as Hope answered her mother.

" _I was feeling under the weather,"_ she lied. _"I was certain you would understand. I did not wish to get Bryson sick."_

" _You're a liar,"_ the mother accused. _"I swear, if you mess this up, you'll be on the street. I have no use for a selfish daughter."_ The line disconnected, and Hope sighed while placing the phone on its receiver. She looked back to Preston with sad eyes.

" _You should probably go."_

Preston's expression softened. _"Hope,"_ he called in warning, walking over to her. _"I won't leave you alone like this. Whatever she said, you don't deserve it."_

" _It doesn't matter,"_ Hope softly replied. _"You don't need my problems."_

" _I want to help,"_ Preston argued. _"Let me."_

" _Maybe,"_ Hope surrendered, _"but for today, I think I just want rest. I can't cancel on him two days in a row, or she really will throw me on the streets."_

Preston was shocked to hear such a thing, his expression souring in distaste. _"She would really throw her only child on the streets,"_ he huffed. _"That makes for all the more reason to leave."_

" _And where would I go?"_ she asked the man. _"I don't really belong anywhere. No family, few friends, and I doubt your family would want me around you."_

" _To hell with my family,"_ he told her. _"I'm working on getting my own place. Once everything goes through, you should come with me."_ Preston walked to her, placed his hands on her shoulders. _"I promise you, we will be happy."_

" _Preston, you hardly know me…"_ Hope reminded him.

" _I know enough,"_ he countered, kissing Hope's cheek and taking her breath away. She gasped and closed her eyes relishing in the loving gesture. _"I'll take my leave, but, Hope…think about it."_

As Hiei started to walk offstage, hand in his pockets, Botan rounded the piano looking back at him, relaxed. _"I will, Preston."_

He turned back to flash her a smirk.

* * *

Hiei couldn't remember a time where he had felt so complacent…or laughed, but he was sitting in Botan's room. She had put on a stupid movie, one Hiei would never find humorous, and he laughed along with her, mainly laughing at her ridiculousness. Botan's mirth was infectious, and he felt something twitch inside of him when her eyes landed on him. The way she looked at him…he didn't ever think anyone ever looked at him like that. His brow furrowed, her eyes never leaving him and expression never changing. "What?"

"I like your laugh," she revealed so simply, yet it flustered Hiei, his cheeks turning red. "We should do this more often." She then paled. "That isn't to say that I meant to take away from rehearsal time. I just lost track is all, but I'm glad you opted to watch the movie with me."

"We have time," Hiei responded curtly with a shrug, trying to avoid her eyes. She was doing strange things to him. "We can always start now." Botan became shy and timid, and Hiei wondered what changed her countenance. "Something wrong?"

"No," she said a little too hurriedly. "No, nothing is wrong…it's just…there's this one scene I'm not…I'm a little scared, Hiei."

He could tell she was reluctant to admit it, and the pink dusting her cheeks was very telling. "Talk to me. What scene, and what has you so scared?"

"Uh…" she hesitated, reaching for her script that was open on her end table. "Well, um…right here."

Hiei could understand when she handed him the script. To be honest, he wasn't certain when he first wrote the script how he'd feel once he reached this part of the play, where Preston had fallen in love with Hope. At first, he had thought he would have difficulty because of his hatred towards the bastard that left them, but things had changed. If he ignored the story he was telling, focused on the moment, the issue now lied in something else entirely.

He really could understand why this scene made her nervous, because it made him nervous for the same reason.

"It's all right," he assured her. "We can work up to it. We don't have to practice it at rehearsals any time soon."

"We have to keep moving forward," Botan argued. "I mean, you and I…we've…but this is just so much more…intimate."

"I know," Hiei stated firmly. "We will be fine."

"Are you sure?" Botan whispered. "I mean, it won't make things awkward."

Hiei scoffed a laugh. "Woman, you worry too much," he admonished. "Just trust me."

Botan nodded at him, and they sat close together looking at the script. The scene was to occur sometime after a fight between Preston and his father and Hope and her mother. The two would go off to meet in a park in the dead of night, mainly to defy their parents but also to be with each other. Hope would express her fear for the future, between them and everything else. Preston would reassure her, convince her that they were all each other needed, serenading her in the quiet of night. The two would then share a passionate, breathtaking kiss, much deeper than the peck they had exchanged in the park. Botan was terrified. She had never kissed like that, and she didn't know what to do.

But Hiei asked her to trust him, so she would. So the scene would play out with them discussing finding their place in the world together, and Hope would try to walk away, but Preston would grab her arm and stop her and begin his song. Softly, Hiei began to sing the words just so Botan could hear. _"Stay with me, baby stay with me, tonight don't leave me alone."_ He'd pull her towards him as the two strolled through the park. _"Walk with me, come and walk with me, to the edge of all we've ever known."_

Hiei looked to Botan, expression firm. _"I can see you there with the city lights, fourteenth floor, pale blue eyes,"_ he told her indicating the times he's seen her cry wanting to escape her life. _"I can breathe you in."_ They'd go to the apartment Preston had acquired, the stage scenery changing to the inside. _"Two shadows standing by the bedroom door, no, I could not want you more than I did right then, as our heads leaned in._

" _Well, I'm not sure what this is gonna be, but with my eyes closed all I see is the skyline, through the window, the moon above you and the streets below. Hold my breath as you're moving in,"_ he sang as Botan moved in. Hiei placed his hands on her shoulders. _"Taste your lips and feel you skin. When the time comes, baby don't run, just kiss me slowly."_

Botan pulled away as per the action in the script, but Hiei didn't release her. She looked to him questioningly and saw something in his eyes that she didn't understand. He was watching her so intensely, and she wondered if she had done something wrong. She was following the script…that Hope wanted to run away from her feelings. Botan felt awful for the not so fictional woman understanding that she had been so ostracized from the world that trusting her feelings was scary. The blue-haired woman could relate, and it scared her. Would she try to run away too, when the time came? That was one of her fears, and it was coming to the surface.

Hiei continued to sing, but he noticed a shift in Botan's mood reflected in her eyes. _"Stay with me,"_ he pleaded. _"Baby stay with me. Tonight don't leave me alone."_ Hiei looked away, the next lines indicating Preston's train of thought, his soliloquy of the feelings Hope made him feel through the stories she told him of her and her father. _"She shows me everything she used to know, picture frames and country roads, when the days were long and the world was small._

" _She stood by as it fell apart, separate rooms and broken hearts,"_ the lyrics read, describing Hope's grief over her father, how she became a shell, and then he turned back to her, gripping her hand forcefully, his eyes adamant as he told her, _"but I won't be the one to let you go."_

Hope wouldn't have the chance to argue as Preston would rest his hands on her hips, holding her close, adjoining their foreheads. _"Oh, I'm not sure what this is gonna be, but with my eyes closed all I see is the skyline, through the window, the moon above you and the streets below. Hold my breath as you're moving in, taste your lips and feel your skin. When the time comes, baby don't run, just kiss me slowly."_

Hope would ignore the plea, again attempting to flee the apartment, Preston going after her, gently grabbing her arm. _"Don't run away,"_ he'd plead again before he explains what he truly feels for her. _"And it's hard to love again,"_ he admitted, reluctantly returning to thoughts of his previous relationship before it had gone to hell, _"when it's the only way it's been, when the only love you know just walked away."_ Botan looked away as Hope would, and Hiei gently grabbed her chin bringing her eyes to meet his. _"If it's something that you want, darling you don't have to run…you don't have to go…"_

He leaned in and whispered in her ear, _"Just stay with me, baby stay with me…"_

Botan leaned in again as Hiei sang the refrain once again, then adding the same statement about their current condition as he would press her back again the set window. _"Oh, I'm not sure where this is gonna go, but in this moment all I know is the skyline, through the window, the moon above you and the streets below. Hold my breath as you're moving in, taste your lips and feel your skin. When the time comes, baby don't run._

" _Just kiss me slowly."_

It was the moment of truth, and Botan's and Hiei's hearts hammered through their chests as they leaned in. The press of Hiei's lips on hers was tentative at first, but they soon became engaged in a heated moment. The moment they connected, Hiei felt his blood boil, and he didn't know if he'd be able to stay in control. He could feel Botan's body relax as she melted into the kiss. He couldn't know that the woman felt a pull in her heart, encouraging her to become more engaged. Her arms wrapped around his lower back, and Hiei's hands traveled up to her hair.

A soft moan escaped her, and that was when Hiei pulled away in surprise over her actions. Botan's cheeks turned red, and Hiei found himself wanting to kiss her like that again. Before he could reach for her, Botan hesitated and apologized. "I-I'm sorry," she stammered, and Hiei had to force himself not to react.

"It's fine," he assured her, but Botan didn't believe him. She couldn't protest, though, for Hiei pulled her to him once more and crashed his lips against hers once more. Botan's eyes widened. She wasn't certain what was happening, but she was pretty certain that they had already been done with rehearsing the scene. Still, she wouldn't argue. Her actor friend _was_ a pretty skilled kisser, and she felt completely at ease in his arms. It felt like this wonderful moment would never end.

"Eh-hem."

Hiei and Botan both pulled away, catching their breaths as they looked to the doorway and saw Yukina standing there, hand on the knob, grinning widely at the two of them before politely excusing herself. Botan's face flushed in her embarrassment, and Hiei's expression was not much different though his expression remained neutral contrasting her wide, doe-eyed appearance. "Uh…I…I'm sorry, again." Hiei's eyes landed on her, questioning her words. "I…won't let it happen again. I know we need to keep things professional."

Her costar chuckled at that and smirked at the irony. He was the one who told himself he'd never date a costar, and here he was making out with one on the floor of her bedroom during a time where they were supposed to be rehearsing. Truthfully, he could use the excuse of "increasing chemistry," but he wasn't a fool. Hiei knew what this really was.

He felt something for her.

Knowing this, Hiei should have slammed the breaks, but he hadn't. Instead, he went along with his impulses. Their kisses felt amazing, and he knew he wanted more. Of course, that wasn't the best idea, not now, and he wouldn't act on that. Really, there were no impulses he should have been listening to, but it happened, and he had no intention of taking it back. "Maybe we need to do something less professional." His words clearly shocked Botan, as well they should, but he would not let her mind linger too long. Neither of them would overthink this. He wouldn't allow it. His arms wrapped around the woman, guiding her back to him, and he kissed her once more.

Botan felt her heart soar.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters

Well, last chapter was completely full of music. This one, yeah, not so much. Hiei and Botan have been focusing so much on his parents' story, and theirs is slowly but surely unfolding. This one is all about them, growing into this new…can we call it a relationship yet? Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

* * *

Of all the things Hiei could be doing, he was forced to attend Thanksgiving dinner at Yukina's and Botan's apartment. Well, not really forced. The girls had told him about it the week before, and he had been given the option to refuse by his sister. She knew he was never really thrilled with the holiday. Still, Botan's light purple eyes silently begged him, and he found himself unable to refuse. It was sickening, and he was loathe to admit he gave in almost immediately.

And, to top it off, they weren't alone. In fact, all of his roommates had been invited. He understood Kuwabara. He was Botan's older brother and guardian. Yusuke was her friend, so it was also expected. Yukina had thought to invite Kurama, knowing he was Hiei's confidant. The small place was incredibly crowded, and Hiei was overwhelmed by it all.

As was Botan. Her empathy usually got to her when there were many people around her. She knew them all, though, so it made it easier to managed, and Kurama seemed to understand her unspoken predicament. He tried to distract her, asking her questions about her music. When Botan spoke about her art, she was so passionate, and Kurama could see similarities between Botan and Hiei as well as their stark differences.

Hiei had left the room to get away from the merriment, and Botan had snuck away, wrapping her arms around him, embracing him from behind. He smirked at that and moved to turn to her, only to be met with her lips. Taking advantage of the moment, he responded to the kiss immediately and enthusiastically. That contact did well to distract him, and he had to admit that it felt good.

"Happy Thanksgiving."

Until she whispered that against him. His expression soured as soon as he registered her words, his face indifferent as his eyes bore into hers like she had slapped him. Botan pouted. "What has you so grumpy?"

Hiei's eyes narrowed at her, and he pulled away crossing his arms. "This day is a waste," he argued. "At least for me. It shouldn't come as a surprise that I hardly have anything to be thankful for. I only celebrate because of Yukina."

Botan's eyes softened, and she moved to place a hand on his shoulder, but he avoided her not wanting her pity. "I disagree, because I'm sure you're thankful for your sister, so it's good you celebrate for her. Just always focus on her."

"Hm," Hiei grunted. He figured Botan would go off and leave him be, but she was still standing there…watching him. "What?"

The woman nervously chewed on her bottom lip. Hiei wondered why she'd appear so nervous in a matter of minutes. "Actually…I know this is out there, but I was planning to ask Kazuma if you and Yukina could come home with us during winter break." Hiei hardly reacted to that, and Botan could barely gage his reaction. "So, uh, what do you think?"

"Why would you do that?" Hiei questioned. He had no plans for break; however, he had no desire to go to this woman's town.

Botan's nerves returned to her as she tried to make up some lame excuse like she wanted to rehearse to keep the lines fresh in her mind, but Hiei could see through it and made her tell him what she was really thinking. "Oh, fine then," she surrendered. "I wanted you to come with us so you can meet my family."

"Botan…" Hiei growled out in warning. He had known it would come eventually, especially now that they were becoming intimate a bit outside of practice to the point where they had both fallen asleep together in Botan's small bed. After a few weeks, Hiei had tried to pull himself away from her more knowing she would be looking for more of him than he wanted to give, mainly meeting her family. The two weren't even dating, so this could not happen. Unfortunately, his response seemed to sadden the woman, and he had to mentally block himself from going to comfort her.

Her lips fell into a frown. "I…I already know you aren't looking for a romantic relationship," she told him, reciting his words from the week before. "I know this is all new to you. It's new to me, too. I knew the idea was a stretch from the beginning, but you are also my friend, and I want you to be a part of my life. I'm not inviting you because I think we're anything more than what we are. If it still bothers you, you don't have to come. I just wanted you to know where I stood, is all."

The idea was a foreign and confusing concept to Hiei, that anyone would want to include him in their lives with no ulterior motive. A part of him tempered as his gaze met hers. That part felt slightly comforted, and in turn another part of him was completely overwhelmed. He breathed out a quiet breath, his voice even as he asked, "And Yukina is going?"

"Yes," she answered. "Well, we still have to ask my brother, but I'm sure he'll say 'yes.'"

Hiei nodded. "If he is fine with it, then I guess I am too," he remarked, surprising the woman, "but only if Yukina is going and he's all right with it."

Arms were thrown around Hiei causing him to tense. He had not expected Botan to throw herself at him, hugging him tightly. Once the initial shock wore off, Hiei tried to pry her off of him while secretly enjoying the way she fit against him and wrapped her arms around his neck. He refused to acknowledge the small twinge he felt. In all honesty, he met his emotional tolerance quota for the day. He would be happy when it was over.

* * *

It had been weeks since he and Botan had spoken of the return to her hometown. Finals had come and gone, and of course there had been some drama. Mainly, Keiko had been pestering Yusuke about his lack of communication during finals week. Botan had had to listen to that whole issue when she had visited her friend. It had left her feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Rehearsals had finally finished for the semester which was actually kind of bittersweet to both Hiei and Botan. Hiei needed the break from the emotional scenes. When he had written the story, he had felt so detached to his own backstory, but Botan's reactions to the happenings always served to remind him that it was just as much his story as it was his parents', and it was starting to affect him in ways he never anticipated. Botan, though she had been reluctant to join his cast and work on the show, had come to feel at home on the stage with Hiei. She almost hadn't wanted the rehearsals to end, though she did need a break herself. What had happened between these two lovers had been so intense, and Botan didn't know how to process it. Part of her wondered if Hiei felt the same. She had felt a lot of his tension and anxiety.

"Well, here we are," Botan stated, driving her car through the town.

Hiei looked around, his eyes narrowing at the small, somewhat suburban town. Botan had spent the ride pointing out different shops and places to the man, Hiei refraining from commenting. This was pretty much how he envisioned Sparrowfield. He was honestly glad he went with Botan separately, Yukina going along with Kuwabara and Yusuke (Yusuke joining Kuwabara had been Botan's idea). She managed to keep his temper even without even knowing he was perturbed by anything in particular. It was hard to believe she came from a small, rumor mill town like this place.

There hadn't been much to the place, as Hiei had expected.

Botan stopped off by a river, and Hiei felt compelled to ask why they were there. At first, Botan hadn't answered. Instead, she got out of the car and walked over the the water, sitting on the grass. Hiei had followed her. That's when Botan explained that this was her secret place, and only Yusuke knew she would go here when things at home became too much for her. She admitted that it was her getaway from her family. She had no doubt she'd retreat there at some point during their visit.

It wasn't until they reached Botan's house that Hiei's ire had skyrocketed, and it came to him in a form that he had never expected. The woman was tackled by a small child before they even reached the door. "Botan!" the child cried in excitement.

Seeing Botan's kindness and tender side was no longer new to Hiei, but it did something to him when he saw her stroke the child's hair and hug her tightly. Words spoken had cast him into the deep end. "Hello, Hina. How are you?"

So much time had passed since Hiei had heard his mother's name, and it jilted him. Rarely was Hiei ever shaken up by anything. This, though, made him feel like he had seen a ghost that had wanted to crush him. Finally, he couldn't contain himself, and he rushed into the house in a huff. Botan was taken aback as Hiei passed her by so quickly and stormed into the house. A frown took over, but she hid it as her sister looked up at her with joyful eyes. "You have to let me inside, Hina," Botan told her with a laugh. "It's very cold out here, and someone isn't wearing her jacket."

"I know," the child whined. "I was just so excited to see you. Who was that guy?"

"That's Hiei," Botan told her. "He's my friend, so be nice to him, okay?"

"Okay!" Hinageshi dutifully replied, saluting her sister. Botan felt so at ease for the moment as she watched the child race back inside. Her mind then went to Hiei. She ran into the house and found him being accosted by Juri and Ruka, and she immediately inserted herself. Hiei radiated murderous intent. Not thinking about the consequences, she yelled over at them and told them to back off. Both sisters were surprised by the tone Botan used, especially since it was so forceful. Ruka grinned at her humorously. "Well, look at who's come back. Tell me, did you fail?"

Botan actually rolled her eyes, and her sister noticed. "Oh please, you know very well that I didn't. It's winter break, and I completed my semester. Does it seem like I failed?"

Juri was flabbergasted and bit out, "Yeah, well…you're…you're…"

"Hn," Hiei scoffed before chuckling. "What an insult."

Juri glared at Hiei, but the man remained unfazed. The child was nothing more than a pathetic brat. Hiei determined this right away. It was unfortunate that Botan's family hadn't been exaggerated. "Whatever," Ruka snapped, looking to her little clone. "Let's go, Juri." Botan shook her head, pinching the bridge of her nose. She looked to Hiei and could still feel his uneasiness, so she pulled him into her room. He didn't protest.

Once inside, she turned to face her brooding friend. "Is everything okay?"

"Fine," he shot back curtly.

"Are you sure?" she asked. "You seem so bothered."

The question left Hiei's mouth quicker than his mind could prevent it. "Why did you call her Hina?"

Botan blinked in a daze before she smiled. "Oh, that's Hinageshi," she explained. "I've always called her Hina for short." Then, his questioned registered. "Why did that have you so upset?"

No answer came as Hiei breathed out an apology, startling her, before she left her alone in her room with confused thoughts.

* * *

The day grew even more difficult for Hiei as he observed the family from a distance. The children were all very disconnected from each other, and he found Botan's older sister always reading magazines or smoking, ignoring the chaos in the house. He could see how out of place Botan felt in her own home, and it reminded him of the foster home he had run away from when he was a child. No wonder Botan wanted to go to school so far away. This was not a family.

Somewhere along the line, Yukina had pulled him aside to gauge his emotions and figure out how he was handling being around the family. She knew he and Botan had become close, but she also knew Hiei wasn't one for crowds or for disrespectful children, and here there were both. He told her it was better than Rui's place. That opened another can of worms, that Botan had known that they were going to go to Rui's.

Hiei hated Rui's, mainly because he did not feel he belonged there, and he had been planning on staying at the school much to Yukina's chagrin. She had been trying to convince him. Hiei's eyes narrowed. Had Botan found out and invited them to her home out of pity? As if reading his thoughts, Yukina had said, "So when Botan asked if we were doing anything for Christmas, I asked her why she was asking. She said she wanted us to meet her family, so I told her that we'd love to come because I knew you'd stay at the school to avoid Rui's."

It had surprised Hiei that Botan had asked his sister before she was even told about Hiei's plans and animosity. That meant she had already been thinking this way and actually wanted him there because they were…something. He had little time to reflect on it because lunch had been announced, but the sentiment was there, and Hiei was starting to relax, but only a little bit.

* * *

During lunch, Hiei watched as the two girls, Ruka and Juri, misbehaved, and the oldest, Shizuru just ignored it allowing it to happen. For the most part, Hiei and his sister ignored it too, being engaged, or only slightly engaged on Hiei's part, in conversation with Botan and Kuwabara. Hinageshi was incredibly respectful, most like Botan. Hiei grew less tense around the child for that reason.

Ruka's attention immediately fell on Botan. "So, did you hear about Marilyn and Bradley?"

Botan had, but she didn't want her sister to know. "No," she lied blandly, "and I honestly don't care."

"Of course you don't," Ruka shot back, "but you should know they're getting married, and since everyone predicted they would, I should warn you that everyone is expecting Yusuke and Keiko to tie the knot next, especially since Yusuke said so."

"That's not how the conversation went," Botan snipped.

"And how would you know?" Ruka question before realization dawned on her. "Oh, he told you about it, huh? That's interesting. Keiko's under the impression you two don't talk anymore."

"Ruka," Kuwabara called out in warning.

"What? I'm just saying…" Ruka carried on. "You know, Botan, you really should just end this. Keiko has suffered enough because of you. It would be better for everyone if you just disappear."

Yukina looked to Botan with worry, especially because she looked so defeated in that moment. Hiei noticed, too, and he was about to engage in the Ruka's game. Botan had almost responded, "Maybe," but before she could, Kuwabara slammed his hand down on the table.

"Ruka, that's enough," he shouted. "Do _not_ talk to your sister that way. If she's friends with Yusuke, that's her business and his, not yours, and you better leave them alone."

"Why do you always take the harlot's side?" Ruka whined. "I'm just fighting back for my friend."

Botan hesitated before she defended herself. "You don't know anything about what happened, so shut up. Keiko is your friend as much as she is mine. You've only ever wanted to make things difficult for me when it came to her."

"It was time she saw your true colors," Ruka countered, smirking arrogantly. "You're nothing more than a filthy-"

"For the last time, Ruka," Kuwabara interrupted, "enough or you're grounded."

"That's not fair," Juri declared in defense of her sister. "Botan started this."

"Botan started nothing," Kuwabara remarked, "and I don't care. I'm ending it." He glanced over at Shizuru, and his eyes silently begged her to back him up.

"Listen to Kazuma," Shizuru muttered, though she sounded more bored than commanding. "I'm going out for a smoke."

"See? You're driving Shizuru to smoke," Juri accused her blue-haired sister. Botan stood up then and just stood there shaking her head before she left the table, lunch uneaten. "And where are you going?"

"Just let her leave," Ruka ordered her subordinate before grinning at her. "It's better she doesn't eat. She's getting puffy."

Kuwabara shook his head. "Ruka, give me you phone, now."

The redhead looked horrified. "What? No!"

"Yes," Kuwabara ordered, grabbing the device off the table. "No phone, no T.V., and you can't go out the week. Go to your room."

Ruka glared hatefully at her older brother before storming off to her room and slamming the door. Shizuru grimaced and looked over to the other redhead. "Thanks for that. Now _I_ have to deal with her."

Kuwabara frowned at his sister and shook his head before he looked to the other two girls. "Juri, Hinageshi, you two should go to your rooms also."

"Are we in trouble?" Little Hinageshi asked.

"No, neither of you are in trouble." His eyes landed on Juri. "Though if you aren't careful, you could be also."

Juri gasped before frowning and going off towards her room and away from her angered brother. The youngest of the family ran off happily, most likely going in search of Botan. Hinageshi always followed Botan around, and it made Kuwabara feel relief. He cast a wary glance over to Shizuru who had hardly looked up at anyone. "What happened to you?"

Shizuru finally looked up and shook her head. "You wouldn't understand," she told her brother. "I never signed on for all of this. I have to deal with it every day."

"You think I did?" Kuwabara questioned, aghast. "Shizuru, I had to drop out of school to put this family back together. I've been dealing with it just as much as you have, and now I'm trying to deal with school and keeping Botan afloat on top of it, and work also so we have income for the girls."

"You can at least get out and away from the girls," Shizuru scoffed. "And they don't complain to you about their problems and drama. I get to hear it all."

"Do you hear anything from Botan?" Kuwabara hissed, slamming down on the table. "Come on, Shizuru. Why would you let them get away with talking to her like that? You know she doesn't deserve it."

"Botan is a big girl and can handle herself," Shizuru countered. "She's fine."

"Ruka is older and could stand to learn some manners," Kuwabara contradicted. "And Botan has trouble too, and their words affect her. Letting this hateful speech continue in our house-"

"My house," Shizuru reminded him. "Mom and dad left it to me."

The redhead shook his head and got up from the table. "I don't know what that Sakyo guy did to you, but you are not my sister, not the one I remember."

He stormed out of the room leaving Shizuru, and she sighed when she heard yet another door slam. Honestly, she was thankful for the now peace and quiet. She needed a break, some time alone, and that was practically impossible to get in this place. This had never been what she wanted in life. She had already given up what she wanted, all because of this obligation that was forced on her. Now, even if she did get a true break, it was too late to experience life the way she had wanted. A thought occurred to Shizuru.

When had she become so bitter? She'd save that mental musing until after her next cigarette. She left the table as well leaving two twins alone both feeling baffled by the whole ordeal they had just witnessed. Yukina looked to her brother concerned, Hiei's eyes widened in shock before his expression relaxed. His gaze wandered to Botan's closed door. The woman seemed to understand her brother's train of thought. "Why don't you go talk to Botan?" she suggested. "I'll go check on Kazuma."

Crimson eyes snapped back over to regard the woman, and they narrowed slightly. "Tell me again why we're involving ourselves with someone else's drama, and why is it your responsibility to cater to him?"

"I just want to make sure he's okay," Yukina offered, "and I'm sure you want to make sure Botan is okay, too, don't you?"

There was no way Hiei was going to answer that question; however, he was feeling concerned for his costar, one of his few friends. Instead of giving his sister the satisfaction, he grunted a curt, "Whatever," and made his way to Botan's closed door. He didn't even knock as he entered. Yukina smiled at her brother's retreating form before she looked towards the direction Botan's older brother had escaped. She had felt terrible after hearing the words he exchanged with his older sister, defending their younger sister and trying to protect her…it wasn't fair that his conversation didn't go as planned. Part of her believed that the man might need someone to talk to, and she hoped to be his confidant. After all, they had bonded quite a bit over poetry. If anything, Yukina could pose as a distraction even if he didn't want to talk about what had transpired.

* * *

Hiei found Botan in her room with her little sister, the young girl chatting excitedly with her sister. She was telling Botan all about school and what she was learning. The woman had a smile on her face as she worked on braiding the little girl's hair. "So, can you bring me to school tomorrow?"

"I don't see why not," Botan agreed, her voice much more lax than it had been. "So, have you and your friends been behaving?"

"Yeah," Hinageshi clipped, blushing slightly, and Botan noticed.

"What's up?" she asked her softly.

Hinageshi looked to Botan guiltily. "Um…one of my friends became friends with another girl and she won't even talk to me anymore. I didn't tell anyone, cuz I didn't want everyone to worry, but they've been saying and doing mean things to me for a little while…"

"Oh, Hina," Botan sighed, shaking her hair as she finished the braid. "If she's behaving that way, then she isn't a real friend. A true friend is someone who listens to you and defends you when they can."

"Really?" Hinageshi asked, her innocent, green eyes searching Botan's. "Is that why Yusuke and you weren't friends for a while? Because he didn't defend you?"

Botan's breath hitched, not expecting the question. She forced a smile and ruffled her sister's red-orange hair. "Now, now," she chided. "We weren't talking about me. We were talking about you, and as for Yusuke he eventually did. Keiko just didn't want to hear it, but he tried."

"Why was Keiko so mad? And why does Ruka always say those mean things that make you cry?"

Hiei frowned. He could imagine Botan crying. He had seen it after Ruka had been on the phone with her on her birthday. Had she been that upset when the youngest entered her room? It wouldn't surprise him. As it stood now, Botan was struggling to come up with an answer that would appease her sister.

A throat was cleared, and Botan's head whipped around, her hair flipping into her face that she had to remove it from her eyes. Hers widened in surprise. "Oh, Hiei…" she called out. Then she paled. "Uh…I'm sorry I left you out there."

"It's fine," Hiei replied, moving to sit down beside Botan and her younger sister. The redhead was eyeing him curiously. "You should go finish eating."

Botan frowned and sighed. "Maybe later," she assured. "I'm not all that hungry right now."

"Because your tummy is upset?" Hinageshi asked.

"Yes, very upset," Botan admitted in a whisper. "Anyway, we were talking about your problem. If this friend of yours can't see you for the wonderful and sweet person you are, then they aren't worth it."

"But I don't wanna lose my friend," Hinageshi argued sadly.

"Your sister is right," Hiei stated. "It sucks, but it's life. Friends don't always stay friends, and you don't have to like it. The thing is that you can always make new friends."

The little girl pouted slightly still. "But I miss my friend…"

"I know, sweetie," Botan told her, pulling the girl into her lap. "I miss Keiko a lot sometimes, too, but it can't be helped sometimes, no matter how hard we try. In this case, your friend made a bad decision to get involved with someone who isn't very nice. I know their words hurt, but it will be okay in the long run. You're a friendly, intelligent little girl. You're going to make many more friends in no time."

Hinageshi beamed at her sister and threw her arms around her for a hug. Botan laughed lightly, smoothing out her hair, her eyes meeting Hiei's stoic orbs. It was a nice, peaceful moment that was ruined seconds later. "Aw, how cute?" Ruka spat out bitterly as she barged into the room. She glared hatefully at Botan. "Makes sense, though. People like you have to stick together. Hinageshi, don't listen to her. You messed up this friendship like she messed up hers."

Hiei nearly growled, about to tell the other redhead off, but Botan stood up at hid a wary Hinageshi behind her. "Ruka, shut up," she said evenly. "Don't talk to her like that. Hinageshi is a sweetheart. Once again, you're hearing that parts of the conversation you want. I don't know what's gotten into you. You can say whatever you want to me, but Hina is _ten_. Leave her alone."

The way Botan had worded her statement had been the wrong call. Hiei saw the sadistic smirk on Ruka's face. Botan had given her permission to say whatever she wanted, and Ruka planned to use the opportunity to hurt her sister…badly. "Fine, if that's how you want it," Ruka jeered. "I wouldn't want to hurt Hinageshi anyway. At least she looks like she belongs in this family. You look nothing like mom or dad, and you have none of their redeeming qualities. I bet they're rolling around in their grave knowing they have such a screw up for a daughter."

Botan's eyes watered, but she blinked back the tears and clenched her fist in anger. "You know what, you're right, but I'm not the screw up, you are." Ruka hadn't expected Botan to say anything. Her sister never had fight, so she never expected her to defend herself while dragging her attacker down with her. "Mom and dad loved us both, loved all of us," she reminded the redhead. "And they never treated any of us unfairly. They'd be appalled by your daily behavior. At least I'm out there living my life instead of completely mooching off of Shizuru and Kazuma, and I don't have to constantly belittle two of my younger sisters just to make myself feel better. Now, get out of my room. If Kazuma catches you here, you'll be grounded for the entirety of _our_ break, so basically until January."

"You…you…" Ruka started to shoot back. She felt so completely stunned she didn't know how to counter. Her fist clenched, and she grabbed the doorknob. "What the hell ever. You're nothing but a little bitch, and now even your 'friends' can see it." The door was slammed shut, and Botan and Hiei heard Kuwabara yelling demanding to know what was going on. Botan let out a breath of relief, her form still tense as she went to hold her younger sister who already had tears forming.

"Don't worry, Hina," Botan attempted to reassure her. "I didn't mean for you to see any of that. You shouldn't be involved in any of my drama."

Hinageshi shook her head. "You didn't do anything," she appealed. "Ruka was being mean. Why is she so mean to you?"

"I don't know, baby," Botan answered, patting her head before smiling. "But it's okay. Your big sister can handle herself, huh?"

It didn't make the child feel better, and Hiei could tell both girls were on the verge of tears. Botan was struggling so hard not to cry in front of her sister. "Botan," Hiei called softly, earning her attention. "Where are your keys?"

The woman eyes him strangely before looking over to her desk. "Um, right there. Why?"

"Let's get out of here for a little bit," he stated, moving to grab the keys. "I'll drive. We'll take your sister with us."

"Oh, Hiei, I couldn't ask you to do that," she fought, but Hiei's narrowed eyes silenced her.

"You aren't asking," he retorted. "I'm offering. You need a break."

The words caused Botan to smile weakly. "Thank you. That might actually be for the best."

So, the three of them had left the house, thankfully with no one around so they could escape without incident. Hiei started the car while Botan had gotten Hinageshi settled in the backseat. Beside himself, Hiei watched her through the rear view mirror and felt a strange feeling of serenity wash over him at the manner in which Botan was able to handle the child. There was peace in her eyes, a peace Hiei had never seen in the woman before, and it twisted his insides uncomfortably. It didn't matter, though. He had a task he needed to fulfill for her benefit, and he planned to make it so that Botan wouldn't have to worry about being found if she ever wanted a true escape.

As he drove away from the house and through the town, Botan couldn't help but ask where they were going. He had purposefully passed her secret spot that she had shown him, so she was at a loss as to where he was taking her and her sister. Hiei smirked at Botan, glancing over for just a minute, only to tell her, "There is a beach about an hour and a half away." Her eyes widened knowingly. "It's time you have a new getaway, far, far away from the town. In a small place like that, there's no way to get true alone time. You start to feel trapped."

Botan wondered how Hiei could speak with such knowledge of that topic. She could only assume he had been met with the same challenges once before in his lifetime. A grin appeared on her face as she leaned back. "Then let's go. A new getaway sounds nice."

Hiei's smirk softened, but the mild devious grin remained. "As you wish, woman."

* * *

It was late in the evening when they returned to the house, Hinageshi passed out for it was well passed her bedtime, and Kuwabara was immediately on them questioning where they were, but his ire was more directed at Hiei for taking Botan and Hinageshi out without letting someone know. The dark-haired teen did not respond or cower as the older man shouted at him, hoping that Hinageshi would stay sleeping as he carried her in. That only served to make Kuwabara angrier. Botan, however, inserted herself between them and made the attempt to pacify her brother explaining what happened with Ruka in her room. She told him that Hiei offered to take her and Hinageshi out of the house to get some distance and have some peace. Her explanation had calmed Kuwabara, his form relaxing as he heaved a heavy sigh and once again looked to Hiei thanking him for looking out for his sisters. Hiei nodded and then handed the sleeping child to her brother.

Once the interrogation had ended, Botan brought Hiei to her room while everyone else was traversing the house. Despite the time away, Botan still felt incredibly overwhelmed and needed to be away from her family. Hiei understood, and he even gave into her silent request as they sat in her bed watching television. Botan had laid her head on Hiei's shoulder, her eyes asking for comfort. It was startling to Hiei that his body simply gave in, planning to only hold her for just a bit. Instead, the two ended up cuddling, lying in her bed. Botan's hands were pressed against his chest, and every so often they moved to gently graze him. The innocent action drove Hiei mad, and he had to force himself not to react to his boiling blood. Botan didn't need that in that moment, but his attraction to her was growing at an alarming rate. His hands remained on her back unmoving, his body only a bit rigid. He was definitely out of his comfort zone. In contrast, Botan had never felt safer and could fully relax.

The two had remained in the embrace for a while, Botan drifting off to sleep only to be awoken by her door slamming open. Her eyes widened, her breathing rapid as she clung to Hiei while holding in a scream. Hiei was infuriated when he looked up and saw Botan's two sisters standing there and yelling out in alarm.

"I knew it!" Ruka screamed. "You really are a slut! Didn't think you'd sleep with a guy right under our own roof."

Hiei moved from the bed carefully so as not to hurt Botan. He stood in front of the two girls with wrathful eyes. Botan had never seen Hiei this angry except when he was around that one girl, Koto. She couldn't believe he had marched right up to her sisters. She knew he was prepared to say something, and she was just in shock more so because her sisters looked horribly uncomfortable. "Watch your mouth," he ordered in a hiss. "Do not speak about my _girlfriend_ like that again."

"Excuse me?" Ruka shot back, outraged. "There is _no_ possible way you are dating my harlot of a sister."

"Do you have any other insults, or is that just the extent of your vocabulary?" Hiei questioned bitterly. "I don't give a damn whether you believe me or not, but you are not to disrespect your sister, period."

Ruka's form shook with rage, and Juri's eyes betrayed her nerves as she and her sister ran out calling for Shizuru and Kuwabara to tattle on their sister. Hiei huffed and shifted his attention to a dazed Botan. She blinked at him, her brow furrowing as her eyes searched his. "Thank you," she stated firmly, though she still seemed uncertain. "For what you said, I mean. You…you really didn't have to make that up, though. We aren't dating."

"Aren't we?" Hiei clipped back before he sighed and then sat beside her on the bed. He then scoffed a laugh. "I wasn't making it up, woman. I've been putting a lot of thought into this for some time."

"A…A lot of thought into what?"

"Us," he admitted a bit awkwardly. "What we are. You said it yourself that I'm not the type for relationships, but I never said it was out of the question."

Botan grew even more timid. "W…What are you saying?"

Hiei's eyes met hers, and Botan could practically feel the emotion radiating off of him. "I'm saying that you're not intolerable. We get along better than I thought I could get along with anyone. I don't really know what this…" He gestured between them. "…is, but I'm not one to shy away from these wonderings. I would like to date you, to find out what we are, if we're compatible or if we're fine the way we are, as…friends."

At first, Botan seemed shock, but as she slowly went over his words in her head, Botan beamed brightly at Hiei with a smile that set his soul on fire. He was so swept up that he moved to kiss her, slowly and with promise of a better tomorrow. When he pulled away, Hiei decided to excuse himself for the night before he got to the point where he wouldn't want to leave. At the door, he looked back at her, her eyes still on him and her infectious smile never fading. "Heh," he laughed lightly, a rare smile on his face. Botan's spirit brightened even more at the thought that maybe she had been the reason for that smile.

Closing the door, Hiei's attention was stolen by the two brats in the other room lying, telling their older sister that they had found Botan in a compromising position with him in her bed. Brow furrowing, he was prepared to go and tell those girls what he really thought of them, but he decided against it when he heard Shizuru counter with, "Botan is a grown woman and can make her own mistakes," as if having a boyfriend could be considered such a thing. This constant slandering of a woman he had been so enchanted by only served to make him despise the majority of Botan's family.

One of the siblings he tolerated showed up, a concerned older brother glaring down at him. "Mind telling me what I'm listening to in there?"

"Not particularly," Hiei remarked, "but out of respect, I'll just say this. They are exaggerating. Nothing happened between your sister and me other than the fact that I asked her out." Kuwabara seemed stunned by the revelation. "I'm not looking for approval. The only opinion I truly care about is Botan's, and she seems happy with our arrangement. I'm only explaining myself to you out of courtesy."

"I see," Kuwabara murmured thoughtfully as he scratched his chin. He seemed to be mulling over the idea. "Well, I can't say I'm thrilled that one of my roommates is looking to get with my sister, but Botan has been a lot happier since she met you. Just, do me a favor. It might seem like a silly thing to ask, but I know my sister well. Botan was always overly sensitive, in general and to other people's strife. She feels very strongly for everyone, and I don't want her to get hurt. I've seen her at her worst, and it always pained me to see her like that. If you're going to pursue her, just…take care of her. As long as you treat her right, I'm fine with this."

Hiei scoffed and crossed his arms looking away indignantly. "I plan to treat her much better than the rest of her supposed family."

Kuwabara released a bitter chuckle and nodded. "You make a good point, Hiei. She deserves much better."

The redhead walked away leaving Hiei to his thoughts. He was surprised that he didn't get much of a lecture, or at least been given a thinly veiled threat. Had it been someone asking him about or simply dating his sister, he'd make sure to strike the fear of God into them. Still, it was nice to get at least some approval despite not needing it, and now he could just focus on Botan and getting to know her more. He already knew so much already, and he had to admit he admired her strong will and tenacity, and he also wanted to make up for the horrible hand she had been dealt. Kuwabara was right. Botan deserved a lot better than what she had.

* * *

Botan couldn't get to sleep, not after what had just happened. Part of her still believed Hiei asking her out to be a dream. She knew it was reality, however, because of the kiss they shared. It was a real kiss. It wasn't like when they rehearsed, and it wasn't like when they first decided to do something "less professional" as Hiei put it. The kiss was not exploratory or even that heated. This was a genuine token of Hiei's affection, as silly as it sounded in her head when the thought entered. She was still in disbelief that it had happened.

Her day had started off fine, got to shit, and then had turned around for the majority though her sisters put a damper on her mood. Hiei had defended her like no other, and now no matter what happened this break, it didn't matter. Nothing could affect the joy she felt in her heart. She couldn't wait to see how things with Hiei would play out. She was very excited that, out of all the people, Hiei was her boyfriend. Things were going to get so much better.


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the songs "Crash and Burn" sung by Savage Garden, "Feel Again" sung by OneRepublic, "Let Me Go" sung by Avril Lavinge and Chad Kroeger, or "When It Rains" sung by Michael Henry and Justin Robinett. I do have the songs on my IPod, though. To be honest, hearing some of these songs in the car helped inspire this story to begin with XD

By the way, sorry for the two month delay. I've had the chapter planned, but for some reason couldn't actually get myself around to writing it. But hey, I'm working on it now. I hope you all enjoy!

* * *

Botan was sitting in a booth at a restaurant where she and Hiei were to meet for their first official date. She checked the time on her phone, the minutes dragging on so much. Of course, she was early, and very, very nervous. Even though they were going very low key, Botan was still becoming increasingly agitated. This was the first time she was going on an actual date with a guy she really liked who was also her friend. She knew that it could end badly, but it could also end well. Her hopes rested on the latter.

Hiei finally arrived, also a bit early, and he seemed surprised that she was already there waiting for him. Their eyes met, and both of them looks incredibly overwhelmed. It shouldn't be like that, they both decided. Why were they so anxious?

The waitress showed up and gave them their menus, smiling coyly as she spoke in such a knowing tone. That clearly agitated Hiei. He didn't like her attitude at all. Botan caught herself smiling when he stated it was coming out of her tip. He was starting to sound like the guy she had come to know all too well.

When they had finished eating, Hiei did not want to stick around so that the waitress could gawk at them. Instead of sitting and talking like they had planned, he asked Botan if she wanted to go somewhere else. Botan understood. The waitress had kind of irked her as well before Hiei ever arrived, making her comments and such. She wasn't mean, but Botan did not want to be a spectacle. She was already nervous enough.

The two decided to get ice cream since they decided not to eat dessert at the restaurant. Hiei knew of a little place close to a harbor a bit further from the school. Both were fine with that arrangement. They didn't need to become part of the gossip mill. Hiei had a simple vanilla cone while Botan went all out getting cookie dough ice cream and having it coated in rainbow sprinkles. Hiei watched in amusement as the ice cream started to melt and the sprinkles weighted the liquid down creating a mess. The train wreck that followed was glorious.

Botan's hand was practically covered in ice cream, and she had gotten some all over her clothes. She grimaced at the sight of herself and sighed. At least what she had gotten to eat of the ice cream had been delicious, but she wasn't sure if it had been worth it. "I'm a mess," she complained, trying to clean herself off with paper napkins. She looked at Hiei, completely embarrassed. He merely grinned at her.

"My dorm is closer than your apartment," he stated, handing her some more napkins. He looked down at her sprinkle-covered shoes and chuckled. "You can clean up there."

The woman did not look pleased that he found such enjoyment out of her shame, but she eventually offered the smirking man a smile. "Thank you. I'd really appreciate that."

So the two had returned to Hiei's dorm room, and not surprisingly, Botan's brother had stayed in for the night, waiting for Hiei to return so he could begin his interrogation. He was about to start his questioning until he saw his little sister covered in ice cream and sprinkles. His brows furrowed, and his gray eyes met purple.

Botan laughed awkwardly. "I, uh, had a little trouble…"

Kuwabara smiled a little bit hearing his sister's chipper voice. It seemed like she had a good time on her date. His eyes went to his roommate and saw Hiei enter his room. He returned quickly with a change of clothes which he handed to Botan. She eyed the clothes and then Hiei and didn't move to accept.

"Take them," Hiei instructed calmly.

But Botan waved her hands and shook her head. "I couldn't impose."

Kuwabara watched the exchange, his eyes solely on Hiei as he adamantly said, "It's not an imposition. It doesn't make sense to wash up only to get back into sticky garments."

Her face flushed red from her mortification, Hiei's soft glare on her demanding she concede. "Still…"

Hiei practically threw the clothes at her. "Just take a damn shower, Botan," he ordered, and Botan actually chuckled at that, before she sighed in contentment. Hiei scoffed and went to his room waving his arms in the air. She smiled at him before she headed to the bathroom. Kuwabara heard her start one of the showers.

The older brother took that time to pester Hiei. The actor had known that Kuwabara would eventually trap him in his and Kurama's room. Hiei was in the process of changing his dress shirt to a plain, black t-shirt. "So how did it go? Where did you go? What did you do?"

Hiei froze, shirtless as he turned to face his roommate. Though he knew Kuwabara would be much like him in regard to his sister, he had something to say that he knew the man wouldn't like. "I respect you as Botan's brother," he stated, "but do not ask detailed questions. I keep my relationships private."

Kuwabara sighed and instead asked, "Did Botan at least have a good time?" Hiei answered with a nod, and the redhead had no other choice but to accept the answer. Hiei seemed like a decent guy, especially in their interaction in the main room and how the dark-haired youth handled his sister. "Then that is all that matters."

"Agreed," Hiei replied before turning away. Kuwabara left him be and that was that. Eventually, Botan had come out of the bathroom dressed in Hiei's clothes. Though he was just a bit shorter than her, his clothes fit, though his pants seemed more like capris. He was going to lie, a feeling of possessiveness washed over him when he saw her in his clothes. Taking her home after that was probably one of the hardest things he had to do.

* * *

Preston was bristling with anger. He had just gotten into a long argument with his father about a contract he had lost, even though he had acquired a new, better client to compensate. He had gone out with Jeice for drinks, but the alcohol did little to numb the rage. He found himself wanting to see Hope, so he called her home. He could hear the mother of the woman he loved in the background telling the girl to tell whoever was calling so late that it was not a proper hour. Hope did so, but Preston answered with, _"I need to see you."_ And hour later, she made it to the park having snuck out of her house. Preston looked up and smiled.

Hope could smell the alcohol on his breath and asked what was wrong. Preston leaned his head against her shoulder, breathing her in, and Hope blushed at the contact. It was easy for Botan to play that role. She was still flustered whenever Hiei did stuff like this even in their own relationship. _"Preston,"_ she murmured. _"Tell me what happened."_

" _My father happened,"_ Hiei growled out the line. _"I'm never good enough."_

" _That's not true,"_ Botan countered. _"Your father is wrong about you."_

" _I'm pathetic,"_ he stated, ignoring the words of the woman. _"I feel so alone when I'm in that office, everyone so cold and empty, lifeless. I don't know what I'm doing there."_

Botan curled into Hiei's form, "Hope" hugging "Preston." _"You're not alone,"_ she whispered in his ear. But Preston would not listen. _"It's true,"_ she assured him before she began to sing lightly and tenderly. _"When you feel all alone, and the world has turn its back on you, give me a moment please to tame your wild, wild heart."_

Preston's eyes met Hope's as she offered an empathetic smile. _"I know you feel like walls are closing in on you. It's hard to find relief, and people can be so cold,"_ she sang before bridging to the chorus.

" _When darkness is upon your door, and you feel like you can't take anymore."_

The music picked up as Botan began to passionately sing the chorus, the colors on the stage changing around them to bring life to the darkened park. _"Let me be the one you call. If you jump, I'll break your fall, lift you up and fly away with you into night."_ As if to prove her point, Hope pulled Preston off the bench guiding him around the park, the two spinning in a circle as she fed him more loving words. _"If you need to fall apart, I can mend a broken heart. If you need to crash, then crash and burn, you're not alone."_

The lights disappeared, giving way to the darkness again, the two walking, Hope never releasing Preston's hand. Preston, still appearing sullen, listened intently, eyeing the woman from the corner of his eye. _"When you feel all alone, and a loyal friend is hard to find, you're caught in a one way street with the monsters in your head."_

" _Tch,"_ Preston chuckled bitterly. Hope had no idea.

" _When hopes and dreams are far away, and you feel you can't face the day…"_

The chorus repeated, this time Botan singing along with the offstage background singers, and the lights returned, Preston starting to pull out of his shell and drop his guard as Hope added, _"Because there has always been heartache and pain, and when it's over you'll breathe again…you'll breathe again."_

As the instrumental section continued to play, the two ran across the stage with all the lights flashing in a fury, depicting the two being in their own world when together. It was so very symbolic and meaningful, and Hiei felt it was even more so, for that's how he truly felt when with Botan. As the lights continued to flash, he went off-script, gently caressing her face, shocking his costar. But he could have sworn he saw her beautiful smile shine brighter than the colored lights as her amethyst eyes met his crimson. _"When you feel all alone,"_ she sang, _"and the world has turn its back on you, give me a moment please to tame your wild, wild heart."_

After Preston gave her his non-verbal commitment, a single nod surrendering himself to this woman forever, Hope sang once more, finishing off the song with the most fervent address of the chorus a few more times, the background singers whispering words of comfort telling the man he wasn't.

" _Let me be the one you call. If you jump, I'll break your fall, lift you up and fly away with you into night. If you need to fall apart, I can mend a broken heart. If you need to crash, then crash and burn, you're not alone."_

As the song tapered out, going out into the distance, Preston nodded. He truly believed Hope's words. _"You're right, I'm not alone,"_ he agreed, his eyes meeting hers, full of fire. _"I have you, Hope. I love you. Please, I need you. Please let me have you._

" _Please let me make love to you…"_

Botan hadn't exactly memorized the scene, so she had to glance at the script she had beside her. Hiei had spoken his part with such passion that he had actually taken her breath away, the intensity in his eyes getting her lost. _"Preston…"_ Hope warned, _"you're drunk. We shouldn't-"_

But Preston silenced the woman with a kiss and nuzzled against her. _"Please,"_ he whispered against her collarbone. _"I need you…"_

Botan glanced back at the script growing pale when she read that, not only does Hope agree, but that she and Hiei would be acting out the actions that led them to falling into bed, the scenery being Preston's secret apartment. She didn't think she could do anything like that in private let alone on stage in front of other people. Thankfully, though, Hiei wasn't going to put that on her that day. Instead, he called cut, noticing Botan's fearful expression directed at him. He dismissed the background dancers, the orchestra, and the other performers. Botan sighed in relief, but she was still trying to figure out how she was going to pull off the scene of the play. She should have kept reading the day before instead of letting herself get blindsided by what the script implied.

At least Hiei had called it a day. She could see him discussing something with Kurama, her heart still racing since she had read the action lines. While she was having her mental conniption, the girl who had approached her the first day after rehearsal, Brigitte, came up to her. "Hey, Botan," she greeted, her voice warm and empathetic. "Would you like to hang out today, now that practice is over?"

Botan hesitated just for a moment mainly because she still didn't know what to do with how she felt about the scene. Normally, when she couldn't handle something, she'd shut herself away until she calmed herself. This girl, though, was looking to spend time with her, though, and part of her wanted to agree. Maybe, just maybe, it would take her mind off of the scene. "Sure," she chimed. "Just let me go say 'goodbye' to Hiei." Brigitte smiled and nodded, allowing Botan to wander off.

She made it off the stage and quickly raced to Hiei, her boyfriend eyeing her strangely considering she had sprinted up to him. "Hey," she greeted both Hiei and Kurama. She glanced apologetically over to Kurama. "I didn't mean to interrupt you boys." Kurama waved his had to silently reassure her that it was fine. Hiei's eyes found hers. "I just wanted to let you know I'm going out with a friend."

Hiei regarded her with his hardened, impassive gaze, his arms crossed. "Why are you telling me?" he questioned, aghast. "I'm not your keeper. Do what you'd like."

Botan's expression fell at his callousness. Was he angry at her for his reaction during the scene? "O-Oh," she stammered. "Yes, right. Well, then…I'll see you around?"

"Hn," Hiei responded, turning back to Kurama. Botan frowned and felt her spirit drop.

It was only when she walked away that Kurama stated to his friend, "That was rather harsh."

Hiei seemed taken aback by that. "What?"

Kurama flashed Hiei a grim expression. "You must know how she took that. You seemed quite angry with her over something so minor."

"What are you talking about?" Hiei asked, going over the encounter in his head. He didn't see where his words could have been taken the wrong way as Kurama was expressing.

"You had a bit of bite to your tone, probably because of our previous discussion," Kurama stated. "Botan most likely took it personally, thinking she has done something to accept you. Your attention returned to me, but you didn't see the saddened expression she wore before she ran off. I did."

Hiei's heart felt a small jolt. In truth, he had called cut because he was too flustered to go to that same scene. He had just gone to Kurama to request more time on it by telling him to e-mail everyone that they were going to rehearse the whole first have of the show the following week. He hadn't thought that Botan would have taken his statement negatively. The man simply wanted her to know that he didn't expect her to run to him and explain her whereabouts. He trusted her, and they made no plans to meet after practice. In his own way, he was telling her to have a good time. "I'll make it up to her later," Hiei stated to his friend, though he wasn't sure why. He didn't need to explain himself to Kurama of all people.

* * *

The two girls decided to go grab some dinner, sushi, actually. That's what Brigitte was craving, but Botan had wished for something else. It only served to remind her of Hiei. Her boyfriend really liked sushi. She even had his favorite spicy katsu chicken roll. That happened to be her favorite, too.

"So," Brigitte stated, interrupting Botan's dismal thoughts of Hiei's ire towards her, "wanna tell me about you and Hiei dating?"

Botan nearly choked on her drink, sputtering it out, and Brigitte felt a little bad for voicing her question. "How did you know?" Botan asked, stunned. It wasn't that she and Hiei were keeping it secret, but they certainly weren't being really public and open about it.

Brigitte offered her friend a kind smile. "Because you just admitted it." Botan flushed red as the other girl explained, "There were just rumors going around that people saw you together. There's been mutterings around the cast. I think everyone was waiting to see how the scene was going to play out today." The blue-haired woman became even redder in the face.

A sigh escaped her. It couldn't be helped. "Yes, it's true," Botan admitted. "But it's new, and we don't want to make a big deal about it, and I'm really, really nervous about it. The scene…I'm glad Hiei called cut because I don't think I can handle it right now."

"How have you handled the other scenes?" Botan was shocked by the question. "Come on. We all know you aren't really an actress. Hiei liked you for the part, and you agreed. It's okay, though. You're amazing, and you add something to the play. It's just, it probably couldn't have been easy for you, being so repressed and all, and apparently Hiei as well, for both of you to have feelings for each other."

"I don't think Hiei has feelings for me, not like that," Botan remarked. "I mean, we're friends. We work well together. That's probably all this is, but…it's nice."

"Why don't you talk to Hiei about your discomfort?" Brigitte asked. "I've heard of him, and I know he's always very respectful of his costars. The fact that you two are dating, I would think, would make him all the more sympathetic. Besides, don't be so worried. It won't be graphic, and everything would be covered up. It's simply acting."

"Yeah, I know," Botan replied, her firm gaze meeting the other girl's. "But it's not for me. I know I'm playing a role, but I really like Hiei. I'm nervous about being that way with him in private. How could I possibly undress myself onstage? How could I pretend to fall into bed with him? It just seems so…I don't know…"

"Yes, you do. What's the real problem, Botan?"

Botan sunk in her see, looking defeated. "I've…never dated anyone before," she confessed. "I'm afraid to be that vulnerable."

Her friend offered her an understanding smile. "So I was right about you being repressed," she teased lightly, and Botan smiled awkwardly. "It's going to be okay, though. I would talk to Hiei about it. He'll help you through it."

"You're right. It'll be okay," Botan stated. "I'm not going to say anything now. I mean, you saw the e-mail. We're going back to the beginning so we can all practice without the script, so there's still time for me to get over these jitters." During that time, Botan figured, she would have time and she could focus on building hers and Hiei's relationship. A week was long enough to feel differently, right? She truly hoped so.

After dinner, she returned back to the apartment with renewed determination. She would find a way to get over this feeling. It couldn't hold her back, not in hers and Hiei's relationship or his show. She couldn't blame him for getting frustrated with her earlier when she knew she was holding them back. He was always being so considerate to her.

She got inside and found Hiei in her room waiting for her. Yukina must have let him in using her spare key. He eyes her warily, and she just seemed perplexed. When Hiei handed her a box of her favorite chocolate caramels, she realized he was trying to apologize, for what she had no idea, but she appreciated the gesture. Their night ended with them sitting in Botan's bed, lying in each other's arms while sharing the chocolates, a movie playing behind them. The two of them fell asleep in each other's arms and didn't wake up until later the next day. Both of them had missed their morning classes, but neither really seemed to care.

* * *

The week had passed, the older scenes perfected, and yet Botan was still no closer to being ready for _that_ scene yet. Hiei must have gathered that for he not so inconspicuously skipped that whole part and continued rehearsing new material with the other actors. He and Botan were on the stage, instead rehearsing the scene where Preston admitted his feelings of love to Hope, proposing to her, and Hope had to go and remind him of her betrothed.

" _That doesn't matter. You're not married, yet,"_ he retold, Hope nodding in agreement. _"Then, we can run away, get married in secret, elope. You'll have nothing to worry about."_

Hope was about to argue, to inform Preston of something, but music picked up around them and Preston began to delve deep into his feelings. _"It's been a long time coming, since I've seen your face. I've been everywhere and back trying to replace everything that I've had 'til my feet when numb, praying like a fool that's been on the run._

" _Heart still beating, but it's not working. It's a million dollar phone that you just can't ring,"_ he continues, tapping his chest before looking into the woman's eyes. _"I reach out trying to love but I feel nothing. Yeah, my heart is numb."_

The woman is confused, not understanding what Preston is trying to say, but then he explains, taking her hands. _"But with you, I feel again. Yeah with you, I can feel again."_

Along with the background singers, the song continued. _"Woo hoo's,"_ were repeated while the words, _"I'm feeling better, since you know me. I was a lonely soul, but that's the old me,"_ were sung.

Hiei soloed again, focusing solely on the woman. _"It's been a long time coming, since I've seen your face. I've been everywhere and back trying to replace everything that I broke 'til my feet when numb, praying like a fool who just shot a gun. Heart still beating, but it's not working. It's like a hundred thousand voices that just can't sing. I reached out trying to love, but I feel nothing. Oh, my heart is numb._

" _But with you,"_ Hiei sang, taking Botan's hand, _"I feel again. And with you, I can feel again."_

" _Preston,"_ Hope tried to interject, but the man whispered the same line to her in congruence with the background singers adding and repeating, _"I'm feeling better, since you know me. I was a lonely soul, but that's the old me. I'm feeling better, since you know me. I was a lonely soul…"_

Hiei finished off the song with the background singers, saying, _"I'm feeling better ever since you know me. I was a lonely soul, but that's the old me. A little wiser now from what you showed me. Yeah, I feel again…feel again…"_

As the song ended, Botan lightly gripped Hiei's shoulder, pulling him back to reality. Her eyes held a touch of nerves, as Hope was feeling that deep anxiety. _"I need to tell you something…"_

Hiei's brow furrowed, indicating Preston's confusing. _"What is it?"_

" _Before we make any decisions,"_ Hope began timidly, _"I have to admit something. Preston, I'm pregnant."_ Though shocked, Preston barely reacted to the news other than silence. _"Please, say something…"_

But he didn't say anything, not right away. Instead, he slipped the ring on her finger and leaned in to whisper, _"Then it's all the more reason that we should wed."_

Relief flooded hope, and she agreed, ready to commit herself to the man she loved. _"I love you."_

Preston allowed her to kiss him and then watched her walk away, most likely returning home from the time being. The light settled on a pensive Preston. Botan turned back to see Hiei still on stage, and she appeared to be confused. She was expecting him to be there at her side. The scene was over.

Or so she thought…

Hiei performed an unexpected soliloquy in that moment, one that stunned everyone in the theater, including Kurama who appeared to be ruffling through the script with deep concentration and a furrowed brow. In this moment, Preston was panicking. _"This is a dream,"_ he whispered. _"No, a full-blown nightmare. I can't be a father. I never wanted to be. This…it changes things…"_

Botan tilted her head in bewilderment, the light dimming to darkness and Hiei walking offstage with a smirk on his face. He seemed genuinely pleased over her reaction. It was as if he wanted to see such shock. "What…was that about?" Botan asked Hiei, and he seemed startled by her question. "Why would you add a scene like that?"

"I like keeping my audience, and, yes, that includes my cast, guessing," he explained. His crimson eyes met her bright purple, his expression serious. "You remember the rest of the songs we wrote, the ones for the next few scenes."

"Well, yeah," Botan remarked, "but I still never expected that. How could you add such an integral scene without telling anyone? We'll have more warning for the finale, right? There won't be anymore surprises?"

Hiei's expression darkened. Yes, he liked keeping his cast guessing, which is why he had lied to Botan and the others that the current ending was not the end. "As I said, I have not written the final scene as of yet, and I want to surprise everyone with that finale, a contrast to the whole play."

Botan seemed pleased to hear that. "I'm glad, relieved actually."

"Why?" Hiei asked, seemingly appalled.

"Because," she murmured softly, wrapping her arms around him, "your parents really seemed to love each other. It would be a shame if they didn't get their happy ending."

Hiei swallowed, feeling overwhelming emotion caused by his girlfriend's naivety. He nearly gagged when he coughed out, "They did." A lie, of course. He kept it bottled inside that his father was nothing more than a poser trying to please his father and that he had abandoned his mother and them once his father had accepted his skills and giving him a promotion.

"Anyway," Botan chimed, her usual cheer radiating from her being, "Yusuke and I were going to go bowling. I'd like you to come, if you want."

"Why not," Hiei replied blandly, desiring to pull himself free of his private thoughts. He actually enjoyed these moments with Botan, though he wasn't too thrilled that they'd have an audience that night. Still, he had nothing better to do. It was either entertain the idea of Yusuke bowling with them or returning him to his girlfriend's prying brother. The choice was obvious.

* * *

Days later, the cast rehearsed again, this time going through the scene where Preston's father had given him the chance to go to New York, an amazing promotion for all his hard work. Preston warred with himself, eventually going to Hope to present his choice. She was happy for him, thrilled even, but she was aware that it meant letting her go. She pleaded with him, the soft piano, slow beat, and violin starting to play as Botan began the song.

" _Love that once hung on the wall, used to mean something, but now it means nothing."_ The music picked up, guitars and drums adding to the sequence. _"The echoes are gone in the hall, but I still remember the pain of December."_

Botan looked to Hiei, sadness in her eyes as she released his hand. _"Oh, there isn't one thing left you could say. I'm sorry. It's too late."_

With female background singers, she ardently sang, _"I'm breaking free from these memories. Gotta let it go, just let it go. I've said 'goodbye,' set it all on fire. Gotta let it go, just let it go."_

Preston's expression soured as he practically accused the woman of throwing what they had away. _"You came back to find I was gone."_ He tapped his heart, his words symbolic. _"And that place is empty, like the hole that was left in me. Like we were nothing at all…"_ He became exasperated. _"It's not that you meant to me, thought we were meant to be. Oh, there isn't one thing left you could say…I'm sorry. It's too late."_

" _I'm breaking free from these memories,"_ Botan sang, Hiei singing in the background harmonizing with her. _"Gotta let it go, just let it go. I've said 'goodbye,' set it all on fire. Gotta let it go, just let it go."_

" _I let it go,"_ Botan hummed, Hiei adding, _"and now I know."_ The two went back and forth with the lyrics.

" _I let it go…"_

" _Down this road."_

" _Where it's right."_

" _You always know…"_

" _So this time…"_

Hiei grabbed her arm forcefully, finishing the exchange. _"I won't let go."_

Hope was shocked at the declaration, but her heart accepts Preston's claim, and she nods. _"There's only one thing left here to say. Love's never too late."_

The two sang the chorus loudly, together. _"I've broken free from these memories. I've let it go, I've let it go. And two goodbyes lend you this new life."_

" _Don't let me go,"_ Hope requested.

Preston nodded. _"Don't let me go."_

Botan sang again, _"Don't let me go, don't let me go…don't let me go."_

" _Won't let you go,"_ Preston assured, Hope still requesting not to be let go multiple times, as if Preston hadn't heard her. Each time, he kept reassuring her with the same promise. After all, Preston wasn't ready for his relationship with Hope to end. He loved her, and he did love their unborn child despite his earlier nerves. He promised her that he would find a way to get out of the promotion, that he was prepared to quit. Hope believed the man she loved.

But it was when she hadn't heard from him that she felt the depression take over.

It had been weeks since she heard from Preston, and it was getting harder to hide her pregnancy from her mother. The woman gazed out her window during the rainstorm, the weather doing a number on her mood. A sigh escaped her, the piano mimicking the drops of water before blaring loudly, mirroring her raging emotions. _"And when it rains, on this side of town, it touch everything. Just say it again and mean it. We don't miss a thing._

" _You made yourself a bed at the bottom of the blackest hole,"_ Hope scolded herself, hugging her knees closer to her chest. _"And convinced yourself that it's not the reason you don't see the sun anymore…"_

She shook her head free of thoughts, talking to Preston as if he was standing in front of her, a ghost in the window. _"And no, oh, how could you do it? Oh, I…I never saw it coming. No, oh, I need an ending, so why can't you stay just long enough to explain?"_

She reached out to touch Preston, but he disappeared from view as her question escaped her. Her head pressed against the window. _"And when it rains, will you always find an escape? Just running away…"_ Her hand rested atop her abdomen. _"From all the ones who love you, from everything…"_

Preston appeared back in the glass, her accusations now shifting to him. _"You made yourself a bed at the bottom of the blackest hole, and you'll sleep 'til May and you'll say that you don't want to see the sun anymore._

" _And no, oh, how could you do it? Oh, I…I never saw it coming. No, oh, I need an ending, so why can't you stay just long enough to explain?"_ She begs his shadow which turns away.

Eventually, she sighs, surrendering and mentally giving Preston the benefit of the doubt. _"Take your time…"_ And then she whispered to herself, _"Take my time._

" _Take these chances to turn it around,"_ she pleaded, an echo singing, _"take your time."_

" _Take these chances, we'll make it somehow,"_ once again, her positivity returned, smiling at the impassive Preston in her window. _"And take these chances to turn it around."_ She interrupted the echo warning her to take her time. _"Just turn it around,"_ she demanded forcefully.

The music paused in that moment, the television glowing, and a voice speaking out over the theater, announcing that Preston, the son of a local business tycoon, had decided to follow in his father's footsteps. He had accepted the promotion, the accolade met with thunderous applause. Hope, though, she just felt shock and numbness. The news barely had a moment before her mother called up to her. _"Hope!"_ she hissed. _"Come down. Bradley and his family have just arrived for a family dinner."_

Hope looks down to her floor, her fists clenched, the woman forcing down her sobs. The piano plays softly and not the whole melody as Hope whispered, _"No…how could you do it? Oh I…I never saw it coming. No, oh, how could you do it… No, oh, I never saw it coming…"_

The piano picked up, the band joining in crescendoing with Botan. _"No, oh, how could you do it? Oh, I, I never saw it coming! No, oh, I need an ending, so why can't you stay just long enough to explain?"_

Preston's reflection walked away as Botan sang for the last time, _"Take you time…"_

She looked back to her own door, knowing what she's going to have to do. _"Take…my…time…"_

The woman then steels herself for the evening ahead, and the lights went out shrouding the stage in darkness.

* * *

Botan was sitting inside her apartment, thankful for the few days she had off from rehearsal. After the last rehearsal she had attended, she had felt completely heartbroken over the story thus far. She knew Hiei had assured her that the play would have a happy ending, but just knowing how much pain his parents had gone through to get there…it was miserable. Even though she was a positive woman, even she didn't see a way that it could have worked out. All the cards in the deck were stacked against the two lovers.

The blue-haired woman prayed for a happy ending after reading the script all the way through. She was completely distraught over what she had rad that she had needed to take a couple of days to right herself. Actually, she had texted Hiei telling him she was sick. Well, it was only a partial lie. She requested a couple days to herself. Hiei's response had conveyed his surprise. After all, Botan was normally the one who wanted to go out and do something, and she eventually admitted that she needed time. She promised him it was nothing he did, that she was just overwhelmed by the play. She just needed to get her emotions in check.

Kurama was the one who explained away the cryptic message.

Hiei had been completely irritated by the statement, wondering what exactly Botan could mean. His friend had informed him of her uncanny talent. "She is an empath," he told the actor.

Red eyes narrowed. "What the hell does that even mean?" he scoffed bitterly.

"It means that Botan can take up the emotions of others as if they were her own," his friend clarified, and Hiei's expression immediately softened, as if he could truly by the claim. "It was something I noticed about her. I wondered how long it would take you to figure it out, but apparently it wasn't something you could see. She hides it well, though, so don't be too hard on yourself for not seeing it."

Hiei growled. "Tch, as if that would bother me." But, and he wouldn't admit that to Kurama, it did bother him. It bothered him that all this time Botan truly had been hurt by this play, and it wasn't anything Hiei could have anticipated. His expression grew grim. If Botan was overwhelmed now, he knew it would be even worse for her when she figured out his lie about the ending. The fact that his father had walked out on them, leaving behind his pregnant girlfriend, would crush her. He grimaced. Maybe it would be better to keep her in the dark for now. A part of him felt like it would spare her the pain. Besides, their relationship was already blossoming, and he'd rather focus on his present then his past.

Moreover, he wasn't yet ready to tell Botan the truth about his past, not yet. That would take time. He was brought back to the realization that he didn't have much of it left.

* * *

A/N: Well, that was quite a lengthy chapter, and a whole bunch of songs were sung. I powered through this one the last couple of days, just for all of us.

And now, I have some really good news. Not too long ago, I ended up planning out the rest of the story, so now I know what chapters everything will happen and whatnot, and I'm excited, because I have some very big scenes and moments coming up that I can't wait to write out. So, lots to look forward to. Hopefully that will help me update more regularly. *fingers crossed*


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the songs this chapter, "Morning Has Broken" played by Jim Brickman (excellent pianist) or "She Is" by The Fray.

* * *

Devastated.

That's how Botan felt when Ruka had called out of the blue. Everything had been going well that day, Hiei visiting simply to spend time with her. They had been in the middle of a heated lip-lock when she called, and Botan had known immediately thanks to Yusuke setting her sister's ringtone to Beethoven's fifth symphony in C minor. It was truly fitting.

Apparently, Shizuru had been in a mood that day, finally placing the blame on the girls for her destroyed past relationship. The older woman had shut herself in her room all day leaving Ruka in charge of Juri and Hinageshi and having to make dinner for them all. Botan ended up being blamed because she wasn't there to take the brunt of someone else's rage. Her sister did not like being on the receiving end of conflict.

Tired of his girlfriend being degraded by her older sister irritated Hiei to the point where he stole the phone out of Botan's hand, the woman gaping into space, her hand still up by her ear as she blinked. "We're busy," he hissed into the receiver before hanging up the device and then turning it off. He tossed it onto the end table taking notice of the soft blush on Botan's face. "What?"

"You must know what she's going to think," Botan remarked, though she didn't sound bothered. After all, he hadn't been wrong.

Hiei merely shrugged and leaned back on the couch, his hands behind his head. "So what was all of that bitching about?" Man, Ruka really did know how to ruin a mood.

Botan actually smiled at her boyfriend. He looked so flustered, and yet he was trying to talk it out with her. She knew that was passed his comfort level. It was appreciated. "It's a really long story," she stated. "You don't want to hear it."

"I wouldn't have asked if I 'didn't want to hear it,'" Hiei grunted. To be honest, he was quite angered by the interruption. He and Botan had been having a good time, the woman having invited him over to listen to her play her rendition of another hymn that reminded him of the good parts of his past. Her interpretation of "Morning Has Broken" had soothed him, made him feel peace. Lately, he had been so wound up, but the soft and chiming melody had drowned his worries in its song. Overcome with emotions he couldn't truly describe, he expressed his passion in his actions, taking Botan by surprise and kissing her with such ardor. It was nothing like their past kisses, he knew. Nothing like when he tried to prove a point about a kiss meaning nothing, and not even out attraction.

Before Botan's sister had interrupted, Botan had been so taken by the kiss. Soft moans had escaped her as her eyes closed. He had loved bringing out that side of her. His eyes had shot open as that fleeting thought registered in his mind, his grip tightening on the woman. Love? Hiei rarely ever felt anything like that for anyone save his mother and sister. He had felt panicked when the thought crossed his mind, but he didn't pull away. He was quite perturbed when Ruka disturbed them.

Now, he wanted to think of anything else but the fleeting feelings of love.

A sigh escaped Botan as she leaned back against the couch. "Well, Ruka, Kazuma, and I are the only ones who really know what happened. Juri was younger, and we kept it from her, and Hinageshi is still too young." Another sigh. "Years ago, Shizuru met this guy, this businessman. She was madly in love with him. When they broke up, it was bad. It was why Kazuma had to put his degree on hold. Shizuru fell apart. He had to put our family back together."

Hiei's gaze fell on hers, and he could see the guilt in Botan's eyes. Now, he really had new respect for Kuwabara. Even if he detested his meddling in his affairs with his sister, he clearly had the right to. He was more like a father than a brother to his girlfriend, and he had done what he had needed to do to protect his family and care for the kids. "Anyway, the reason for the breakup was because Sakyo had been offered a deal to get out of the country, something he had been working towards for ten years. He asked her to go with him. She wanted to, but she felt obligated to stay. She didn't know what would happen to us if she went.

"Sakyo then told her part of the reason he wanted to leave was us." Tears formed in her eyes as she said this. "He never wanted a family, and he had no desire to put up with 'whiny brats.' Shizuru always wanted to get out of that town. She lost her chance of escape because of us. Today, I don't know what happened, but Ruka must have done or said something to set Shizuru off, and she finally came out and said what we've all been thinking, that it's our fault, and then she left Ruka in charge of fending for herself and the kids."

"Not that I agree with what your sister said," Hiei started, "but it's about damn time she made your sister do shit around the house. I don't agree with that asshole either, but those two sisters of yours are whiny brats and they could stand to be taken down a few pegs. It's pathetic that they tried taking you down with them."

"I wish I could get Hina out of there," Botan murmured. "She doesn't deserve to be exposed to that." Hiei agreed.

Hiei though the conversation was over, but Botan had apparently picked up on his earlier panic. Knowing of her empathy did not make it any easier to stave off. When she decided to ask him what caused his anxiety, he lied to her about what he was feeling, especially since he wasn't entirely sure what it was or how to express it. To get the attention off of him, he suggested they watch a movie, anything to take his mind off of his internal revelation. He couldn't be in love, he berated himself. That had never been part of the plan. Ever.

* * *

As the days passed, Hiei was still struggling with these newfound feelings. He had stayed away from Botan, though he did not want to worry her. He didn't completely shut her out, instead texting her and only seeing her at rehearsals. Even the stage couldn't help him combat his emotions as per normal. He couldn't lose himself like he normally did in his work because the object of his affection and torment was his costar.

He could tell Botan was starting to feel concern towards him, and he had already assured her that the anxiety came from the play, how it would be airing in just a few short months. After all, that was a big part of it, the anticipation of not only stunning his cast, but also an audience on an opening night. It was his own work, and he was determined yet impatient over seeing it through.

Although, after he had mentioned his anxiety over the play, Botan was even more determined to reassure him. She pulled him aside, the two of them alone backstage, and then she wrapped his arms around him. Hiei tensed, all the air forced out of his body, but Botan didn't notice any of it. She closed her eyes and smiled, her voice soft and sweet. "It'll be okay, Hiei," she said to him. "You're amazing. I promise, I'll do everything in my power to make sure you succeed." Her simple and kind declaration had overwhelmed the actor, and, against his better judgement, he returned the hug gripping her tightly. For the first time during the course of their friendship and relationship, Hiei knew that he didn't want to let her go. It terrified him.

It did not help that everything started to remind him of his blue-haired costar. The color of the sky, the sound of wind chimes, and even music reminded him of her. One day, he was chased around by one song that seemed to be playing everywhere he went, especially the bus. It was an old song, too, one that should have been long but forgotten. And the lyrics were hauntingly similar to what he was feeling.

" _She is everything I need that I never knew I wanted. She is everything I want that I never knew I needed… She is everything I needed. She is everything."_

He could not get the chorus out of his head, and as if that wasn't bothering him enough, the bridges of _"She's going to bring me clarity. You take the heart right out of me"_ and _"This is going to bring me to my knees. I just want to hold you close to me"_ were even worse, and his avoidance of Botan was becoming painfully clear.

It wasn't as if he was ignoring his feelings. He recognized them, and yet he still didn't know what to do with those unsettling his emotions. That blasted song was doing little to quell his anxiety. Not only was that getting to him, but everyone around him had been able to sense his agitation. Unfortunately, the one to pursue him about it had to be the woman's best friend, Yusuke. He didn't really care much for the other teenager. After all, he held Yusuke responsible for the past Botan had confided in him. Though he tried to make up for it, Hiei could see that Botan stilled suffered from it. Her guilt over the idiot's and her brother's friendship was a testament to that. Still, however foolish, Yusuke was very observant, too observant, and decided to play detective. "So, what's going on between you and Botan that has you so moody?"

He hit the nail right on the head, and that irritated Hiei.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," he lied, his voice holding quite a bit of contempt. "Nothing is going on, not that it's any of your business."

"Come on, she's my best friend," Yusuke stated. "She tells me quite a lot. You've been avoiding her lately, and I'm not buying the whole 'I'm stressed out about a play' bullshit. She might buy it, but I don't."

"Hn," Hiei grunted. "Too bad for you. Now, get out of my way and let me into my room before I lose my temper."

"Look, it's okay if you like her," Yusuke said, softening. Hiei's glare only intensified in response. "Just don't shut her out. She really cares about you."

"You're delusional," Hiei growled, "if you think I'm going to discuss anything regarding me and the woman. You don't know anything about what I feel." Of course, that was a lie. Yusuke pegged him perfectly, but Hiei didn't want it getting back to Botan. It was best to deny everything now. "Now stay out of my business."

Hiei made it into his room and slammed the door shut hard. Kurama had been sitting at his desk reading, and Hiei could tell from that knowing smirk that his friend had overheard the entire exchange. "Maybe you should listen to him if you care so much for the girl."

"Not you too," the actor groaned as he threw himself on his bed. He covered his face with his arm. "Kurama, do us both a favor and shove it. I don't have those kinds of feelings for her. There is an attraction, and that is all."

"Of course," Kurama remarked coyly. "Because you date all your costars."

"Kurama…" His voice held enough warning that shut his roommate up for the rest of the night, and that suited Hiei just fine. He didn't need anyone else's advice. He planned to deny his feelings to whoever asked, unless it happened to be a woman with a hair the color of cotton candy with eyes that sparkled like purple jewels. Hiei nearly gagged at his mental image. Where the hell had that come from?

* * *

The next time Hiei heard from Botan, she had expressed that Yukina was out, unbeknownst to them with Botan's brother, and that she wanted to see him. It wasn't a clingy statement either. For the first time, Botan brought up the scene he had only recently been dreading that he added, the scene where Preston and Hope end up in bed together, or as Botan put it, regrettably, "making love." Even though Hiei had wrote his father's character that way, it was more of a testament as to how far the man was willing to go, how deeply he was willing to lie and convince his unsuspecting mother to give in to him. Hiei shook his head. He couldn't deal with the animosity in that moment. Unfortunately, he needed to go and deal with his shy costar. His simple reply of "it will be fine" was met with "but I'm scared."

Going to see her was really that only answer, then.

Once at his girlfriend's apartment, he could see just how timid and frightened she was over the whole ordeal. Her guilt-ridden eyes met his, and she whispered the words, "I don't think I can do this."

Hiei sighed, understanding how the woman felt. He remembered his first mature performance. His costar had helped him through it, and there were no feelings involved. It was easy, simple. This had become anything but…and Hiei was reminded why he never got involved with his costars, though Botan was much different from anyone else he had ever worked with. She wasn't experienced, innocent, naïve, and so many other adjectives that normally annoyed Hiei yet he found to be extremely fitting of her, and he was loathe to admit he found it endearing at times.

Normally, Hiei would just practice with his costars to take the edge off on the stage when they performed. If it was anyone else, he would have dealt with it back when they reached the scene, but he wanted to wait a little longer. For the first time, Hiei questioned his competency, not knowing if he'd be able to walk her through it all while knowing how he truly felt about her.

Botan struggled to catch her breath, clearly panicking. Hiei had to remind herself that she had never had a boyfriend, never been this close to or exposed to a man. He knelt before her, lifting her face to look at him, Botan appearing shocked. "Relax, woman," he whispered. "This will just take some practice and getting used to. Trust me."

In her eyes, Botan resigned herself to him. "I trust you."

Hiei nodded, taking a deep breath, and Botan's brow quirked. Surprisingly, she could tell that her boyfriend, too, was nervous, and that was incredibly unlike him. His hand reached for her, both shaky as they settled on her hips. Botan looked into his stoic, crimson eyes, hers questioning. Hiei leaned closer to her, causing her to tense. _"Please let me make love to you…"_ he quoted from the script. Botan swallowed, but she gripped his wrists and nodded.

Hiei moved his hands, hers along with his, and he directed her to wrap her arms around his neck. As if by instinct, Botan playing with the strands of his hair at the base of his neck. His eyes closed, and he heaved a heavy breath through his nose. Then he looked to her. "Do what feels right, and stop me if I make you feel uncomfortable," he instructed. Again, Botan nodded, but she said nothing. Still, there was this hesitancy in her eyes, especially when he glided his hand down her body. He stopped at the hem of her shirt, gently moving to remove it. He felt her tense when he reached her belly, a slight yelp of surprise escaped her. Hiei removed his hands and let her shirt fall back into place. "Maybe you should start with me."

"Are you sure?" Botan asked, her fingers twitching in anticipation and anxiety. Hiei smirked. Now they were getting somewhere. He nodded, granting her permission. Tentative touches caused Hiei's muscles to tense beneath his clothes. He didn't expect such simple movements to do this, but it was fine. Botan needed to build confidence. It meant letting her do whatever she needed without stopping her and making her second guess herself. Decision filled her candy-colored eyes, and her fingers moved to his shirt. She bunched the black material in her tiny fists, Hiei watching her every move. She could practically feel his eyes on her, but she knew they were not full of judgement. She didn't know how to describe the emotions pouring off of the actor. Swallowing down her nerves, she slid Hiei's shirt up his body and over his head. His eyes had closed for a fraction of a second, and opened once his shirt was removed and tossed to the ground beside them. He nodded at her and moved forward, taking her hands in his. He placed them against his chest and leaned in to kiss her, and Botan took it as encouragement. She shyly touched his pants, her fingers lingering over the dark button. Hiei nibbled on her lower lip, and Botan felt her mind entering a haze. Slowly, she unbuttoned his slacks, and he finished removing them so she didn't have to. Hiei was practically naked, and Botan was thankful that the scene didn't call for the total removal. She didn't think she could handle that on stage.

It was Hiei's turn to remove her clothes. To be honest, he pictured this scene happening much faster in his mind, but with Botan each moment seemed to last forever, which was both a good and bad thing for him. It was good because it meant he had time to re-center himself after each touch, but it was bad because he was existing in this one moment. His control was starting to slip. He needed to finish practicing the scene quickly before his mind snapped.

Gently, he went to remove her top again, Botan still flinching under his touch even as he kissed her. This time, though, she wouldn't let him pull away. She had him rest his hands there for a moment. He tested the waters, gently brushing his fingers against her. She twitched underneath his touch. Hiei was surprised. She was actually ticklish. He smiled, Botan detecting the quirk in his lips before she pulled away for air. Hiei took advantage of that moment and pulled the shirt off of her and tossed it to the side, not caring where it fell. He felt the woman quiver beneath him as his thumbs traced circles on her warm skin. His eyes clenched shut, his brow furrowing as he tried to rein in his desire. This was practice, that's all it could be.

Somewhere down the line, when both were in nothing but their undergarments, practice had become a little too real. Hiei lost his grip on reality, allowed the peaceful fog to flood over him. His mind had surrendered to his desire, the kisses between them becoming needy. Finally, Hiei took over again, heatedly kissing Botan, his hands exploring her bare skin.

Botan moaned in his mouth, her arms wrapping around his neck. She was too far gone by this point, her mind traveling back to her music, and she could pair it to hers and Hiei's sensual dance. Maybe, she could really get through this scene. Everything was okay. She just had to keep trusting him.

And then he surprised her, lifting her up. Her grip on her boyfriend tightened, and her legs instinctively wrapped around his waist. Their passionate lip-lock continued, Hiei getting lost in the miasma of sensations he was feeling and pressing the woman up against the wall. As her back hit the smooth surface, she gasped in shock and pulled her head away, his mouth descending upon her collarbone. "H-Hiei?" she called out his name questioningly. She knew this wasn't part of the script. No answer was received as Hiei met her lips with his again, Botan giving into him and moving her lips against his fervently. Hiei then strengthened his hold on her as he carried her off into her room, kicking the door closed behind him.

* * *

Morning broke, and Hiei was the first to wake, his eyes transfixed on his girlfriend's tousled hair. As chaotic as his storm of emotions were the day before, he actually felt very calm and steady, a small grin gracing his features before he shook it off. The two of them were wrapped in Botan's blanket she had had on the couch, both of them leaning against said couch while curled up against each other. Hiei thought back to their activities the previous day, and though everything escalated quickly, Hiei remembered that they had in fact fallen asleep on the couch, his arms wrapped protectively and possessively around Botan's waist with her hand draped over his chest. Somehow, they must have ended up on the floor, though they had both remained asleep and pressed up against each other.

His fingers gently caressed her, pushing wisps of blue hair from her face that had been stuck to her sweaty face. The sensation of his fingertips alerted Botan causing her to stir in her sleep. Her eyes blinked open and darted upwards to see Hiei, her boyfriend wearing a small, soft smirk. She appeared so surprised. Then she looked down at them, their lack of attire, and around the room to see their undergarments strewn about. Cheeks flushed red as she tried to say something, anything, her sleepy mutterings coming out as nervous stammers.

She was pulled in for a kiss, a brief one, and then Hiei pulled away whispering, "Good morning," over her lips. Botan immediately relaxed, allowing Hiei to repeat his actions a few more times. Eventually, though, Hiei pulled himself out from under the covers. He chuckled when Botan immediately shielded her eyes. At this point, modesty didn't really matter, but Hiei picked up his underwear and put it on. "Do you still have my clothes that you borrowed?" He looked over to see Botan still covering her eyes. "You can look, you know."

Timidly, Botan removed her hands, but she still blushed when she saw him. She pointed to her dresser and nodded to answer his question. It pleased Hiei that she still had his clothes. He took out the pants and got dressed, planning to go out and grab his shirt from the living room. While he was at the dresser, though, he did grab a pair of briefs for Botan as well as his shirt. He walked over to her and handed them to her. Botan was hesitant to move, but she took the clothes and then voiced the sweetest of questions. "W-Where do we go from here?"

Hiei actually laughed, jovially and not mockingly, as he knelt down in front of her. Botan flinched away feeling incredibly vulnerable even though her naked form was covered by the blanket. "We continue as is," he expressed, his voice softer than she had ever heard. "You are my girlfriend, costar, and friend, and I care about you. That's where we go from here."

She could feel the sincerity and smiled warmly, her anxiety disappearing as she felt more at ease in his presence. Her answer was a simple nod, and Hiei got up to leave and let her get dressed. He closed the door behind him and made his way to the living room to gather both their clothes, only to be met with his sister, Yukina immediately spotting him. Shock was in her eyes, but she merely smiled at him. Considering the sight of their clothes thrown about, it didn't take a rocket scientist, even someone as innocent as his sister, to figure out what happened. "Would you like to stay for breakfast?" she asked.

Hiei answered with a shake of his head. "As much as I'd appreciate it," he began, beginning to pick up the articles of clothing, "I think it would be a little awkward. Besides, I believe we're all running late for classes."

"I understand," Yukina replied. "Just know this, brother. I'm happy for you, and I promise not to say anything."

Her brother paused for a moment before shrugging. He had no idea who Yukina _would_ tell that she'd have to make that promise. Either way, her discretion was appreciated. He hadn't intended for this to happen, but he wasn't disappointed about it either. Still, he liked to keep his relationships as private as possible.

He returned to his dorm soon after, thankful that his roommates, especially Kuwabara, were already in class. He stripped off his clothes to go and take a shower to ready himself for the day. A sigh was released as the hot water soothed his muscles.

* * *

Botan sighed as the hot water hit her body, alleviating the aches she was feeling. Her mind went over what she and Hiei had done, and of course that led her to think about their relationship. She had never dated anyone before, and with Hiei especially they hadn't been dating long. A part of her wondered if she had made a mistake the previous night. She could definitely see her family giving her a hard time. However, she was so incredibly happy and relaxed, and Hiei seemed to be as well. Maybe the anxiety he had been feeling was because he didn't know how to express himself in their relationship. Though he was probably more experienced with the physical aspect of a relationship, she was fairly certain she was his first actual girlfriend. It was just something she sensed from him, that this was as new to her as it was to him. She made a decision, then. She wasn't going to let her thoughts of what other people, even her family, would say get in the way of hers and Hiei's relationship. Though neither intended this to happen, Botan was confident in what they did. She was still incredibly shy and nervous, though. Perhaps that would change over time.

At first, when she saw Hiei beside her, she was actually expecting herself to be met with anger, but instead she was met with tenderness, and that now led her to think about her feelings for her boyfriend. At first, they were simply costars, Botan fighting him at every turn, but he was always caring about her emotional state. She confided much in him about her past and family, and he had listened as a true friend would. He had met her family and didn't believe she deserved the emotional torment she was put through. He had even asked her out, even though they had only just started giving into attraction. Dare she say the gentle look he awarded her that morning was full of love? Did he love her? Did she love him? She wasn't sure about him, but he did admit he cared about her. As for the latter, she could admit to herself that she really did love him. A smile graced her features for she felt true happiness. She was in love. For the first time in her life, she was in love.

When she finished getting dressed, she found breakfast waiting for her on the table. She blushed once more, realizing that she had slept with her roommate and friend's brother. Yukina had already known they were dating and seemed to like Botan for her brother. The other woman had to have put two and two together when she came home and saw clothes everywhere, clothes that had been conspicuously removed from the living room either by Yukina or Hiei. Botan didn't know, but she decided not to worry about anything now. Right now, she just wanted to focus on her love for Hiei. Everything else would have to come second as the giddiness and joy took over her entire being.

* * *

A/N: Not gonna lie, as I wrote this chapter, I kept playing the playlist of songs I made for this story over and over again, and every time I wrote any intimate moments between the two, the song "Reflections" by Jim Brickman that I used in earlier chapters, when Hiei was first interested in Botan's playing, kept coming on and just kind of fit the mood. Funny how that works out.

Okay, now I gotta get on next chapter. I'm really excited for it, mainly because one of the songs I've been longing to use will finally come into play, a powerful song that I love playing on repeat. Anyway, you'll see next chapter. Until next time! *waves*


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the songs "Syndicate" by The Fray or "Bells of New York City" by Josh Groban. And yes, that last song is the song that I've been longing to write in here, and I have the perfect scene pictured for it. I hope you enjoy!

Also, in addition to trying to work weekly updates for a few of my stories, I'm hoping to also keep you more notified. On my fanfiction profile, I do a monthly update deal and occasionally change the stories in my "Currently Working On" section. I decided that I wasn't doing much with my DeviantArt account except the occasional practice drawing. So now, I'm going to be using it to give you more real time updates. Feel free, if you have or decide to make an account, to search and watch Firestorm1991 (makes it easier to remember, right?). That way, you can know what I'm up to and updating.

* * *

A month had passed since that one night Hiei and Botan had spent together, and they had spent many more nights together. It had become a new development in their relationship, neither wanting to spend much time apart. Usually, Hiei would sneak out after Kuwabara turned in for the night, simply to not have to explain himself to the man. After all, he and Botan were both adults, and Hiei had no intention of hurting her, so his roommate's skepticism and questioning insulted him. He would rather avoid confrontation altogether.

Their chemistry had increased even more in their actual relationship and even for rehearsal. Everyone had taken notice of it. Every kiss, every touch, and even when they practiced the scene where Preston undressed Hope and lied her down on the bed all just seemed so natural and true. Of course, they didn't practice the last scene too much for Hiei would always feel the need to continue the scene after rehearsal in private.

Kurama even noticed a change in Hiei's mood. He tried to question his friend about it, but, as usual, Hiei had kept his answers short, clipped, and very cryptic. All he would really tell his nosy friend was that everything was going well. The redhead could only guess at what that meant, but he honestly liked to assume that Botan had been responsible for the change in Hiei. It was a very positive change. Both seemed to be incredibly at ease, so whatever was going on must have calmed the both of them.

That was, until Botan found out she was pregnant.

The woman had found this out on her own. Not only had she missed her period, but she had gotten sick one morning after Yukina had left and put two and two together. To be sure, she had cancelled her meeting with her advisor regarding the upcoming recital and went to get a pregnancy test. So now, she was just sitting in the bathroom staring at the positive test and the little plus sign in disbelief. It wasn't a complete shock to her that she was pregnant, though she and Hiei had used protection, but she didn't know how to react to it. She and Hiei were just at the start of their relationship. He already had so much stress regarding the upcoming show. He had been handling it better because he was with her the majority of his free time. Even so, she didn't want to add the idea of a child into the mix, not yet.

Botan made a decision. For now, she would keep it to herself, only for a little while. She wasn't very far along, and besides it could have been a false positive. She planned to get another test sometime after rehearsal, just to make sure. Speaking of, she needed to get to rehearsal very soon. Tossing the test in the trash, she then washed her hands and went off, making her way to the theater. They had a lot of work to do. A proud smile graced her features. Hiei's show was going to be amazing. She just knew it.

* * *

" _Don't go."_

Preston froze on the platform in front of the entrance of a train, looking back to see Hope standing there with tears in her eyes. A sigh escaped him, and he walked away from the vessel. _"Hope…I didn't expect to see you,"_ he said softly, stroking her cheek. _"I was going to call you when I got settled in."_

" _Why are you leaving?"_ she asked, leaning her head into his touch. _"I thought we were happy."_

He smiled at her, a forced smile, but it appeared genuine to Hope. _"We are happy. This is just something I have to do…for us and our future. I tried to get out of it, but my father wouldn't hear of it. It's temporary, Hope. I'll be back, and we can pick up right from where we left off."_

" _But what about…"_ She froze as she saw that same impassive mask slip back on his face. _"Preston?"_

His hand moved to her belly. _"I will be back,"_ he promised, his voice devoid of emotion. _"I promise."_

Though she was uncertain about his tone, his words brought comfort to the woman. But it still wasn't enough, and a part of her told her he was giving up. He was listening to his father doing something he didn't want, but he still had time to fight back. The piano vigorously played an intro before other instruments, drums and guitars, piled on, Hope trying to reason with her lover to convince him to stay. _"Halfway around the world lies the one thing that you want,"_ she indicated, knowing that New York was pretty far away, that they wouldn't be together for all that time. _"Buried in the ground, hundreds of miles down_ …

" _First thing that arises in your mind while you awake,"_ she predicted, knowing how torn he must be, _"It's bending you 'til you break. Let me hold you now."_

She embraced him gently, her hands on his cheeks as his eyes remained averted, like he couldn't face her after cowardly giving into a man he detested. _"Baby close your eyes, don't open 'til the morning light. Baby don't forget we haven't lost it all yet,"_ the chorus went, Hope trying to renew his vigor, promising that they could still make it through together.

Preston turned away from Hope, facing the train once more, his expression pained and defeated. It appeared he really wanted to stay with her. _"Don't know what you're made of 'til the one thing that you want is coming with the dawn and suddenly changes,"_ Hope offered to her lover, encouraging him but also questioning him indirectly on what he truly wanted. Either he still wanted to be with her and would show his father what he was made of, or he actually wanted to go to New York without her. That thought terrified her. She was starting to feel like she was saying "goodbye."

" _Monday, syndicate me, it's everyone the same,"_ Preston interjected bitterly, still sounding like he didn't want to go, that he was convincing himself to do it because of his father and obligations. He didn't want to be controlled by the group he'd be forced to work under and was dreading the separation just as much as his love. Relief washed over Hope. He shook his head, succumbing to defeat. _"But all we've lost to the flame…"_

" _Listen to me now,"_ Hope demanded lightly, the chorus resounding, once again encouraging Preston to stay and reason with his father, stand up to him. She added another argument to her encouragement, and Preston turned back to her smirking. _"All we know for sure is all that we are fighting for...baby don't forget we haven't lost it all yet._

" _Someday when this is over, we mix it up, no answer,"_ Hope sang, moving to embrace Preston, and returns her embrace this time. _"For now it's when I hold you. We are closer, we are closer."_

Preston returned her line, agreeing. _"We are closer, we are closer."_

Hope once more sang the chorus, Preston walking away from the train, the two ready to fight for their relationship to their families. The guitar played a nice string of notes that held a certain softness that they only felt with each other, both of them echoing that they were closer. Closer to being together and being a family, the piano finishing out the song after Preston one last time said, _"We are closer."_

The whistle of the train blew the second the song was ended, the conductor calling, _"All aboard."_

Preston looked back to the train, releasing a heavy sigh. _"Hope…I have to go,"_ he told her. Hope's expression became one of fear, but Preston smiled. _"But this isn't over. The only reason is I do have to be there for an important meeting, but it doesn't mean I've given up on us. My father is there waiting for me, and I'm going to tell him about us, about us and the kid. I promise, Hope. I'm going to fight for us, just as long as you keep fighting, too."_

" _I already have,"_ Hope admitted. Preston seemed shocked. _"I told my mother the last time Bradley came over for dinner that I would not be marrying him, that there's someone else."_

Preston flashed a tight smile. _"Was that wise to do, now? Surely it hasn't been easy for you. Your mother must be furious."_

Hope laughed at that. _"Not as much as she will be when she finds out I'm pregnant. I'll tell her soon."_ A look of concern flashed over Preston's face. _"Preston, what's wrong?"_ Hope asked when he gave her that look. He didn't answer. Instead, he just embraced her and held her tightly. Strangely enough, his embrace held a certain finality.

" _I love you, Hope…I always will."_

Hope smiled, ignoring the wistful tremble of his voice. _"I love you, too, Preston. I'll wait for you, always."_

Preston finally released her, heading to the train, and he cast her one final glance before he went inside and a door slid closed. The stage went dark, the scene finished. The stage crew then came up to change the scenery around to Preston's New York City office, more like his apartment really at the top of the office building. Hiei went to Botan under the darkness of the stage, kissing her cheek and whispering a compliment to her, a simple, "You did well." Botan beamed at him before kissing him on the lips. She had to leave him for a little bit, the next scene primarily being Hiei's big solo. During that scene, a letter would be ready in her voice from below the stage before she actually played along with Hiei's song.

Hiei made his way into his chair, picking up a piece of paper. The lights flared up, a television in the room giving off a fake fire to make the living space homier. He was learning against his desk, snow falling outside the window behind him. Below the stage, Botan was prepared to speak into her small microphone, to read the letter that Hiei held in his hands.

" _My beloved Preston,"_ it read. _"I have so much to tell you. Though I haven't heard from you, I understand. Recently, I told my mother everything. It became impossible to hide myself any longer even though I'm not so far along. I'll get to that in a moment. My mother was furious and kicked me out, so if you tried to contact me I wasn't there, but I landed a job at the place we met. I made enough to afford a small apartment. In other news, and old friend of mine is moving back to the area. She's so excited for us. I told her all about you. I miss you so much. I wish you were here. I found out the most amazing news. Twins, Preston. We're having twins! I couldn't believe it when I heard the two heartbeats. I wish I could have shared that with you. Hopefully soon I'll have a number to give you, but I hope mail will be enough for now. All my love. Hope."_

As soon as Botan finished speaking the lines, Hiei's head dropped as he sank into his chair, and below the pianist turned off the mic she was wearing and readied her fingers over the keys. After a moment of silence, her fingers clashed on the keys loudly, an eerie, mystical sound relaying the tumultuous emotions of Preston while taking place of the grandfather clock, the bell tolling for the man. The flutes entered quite daintily, followed by an eloquent string of notes by the piano accompanied by the horns and brass. The final notes of the intro were held shortly before dissipating.

" _There's a pale winter moon in the sky coming through my window,"_ Hiei came in joining the band, his voice soft yet passionate, slowly increasing volume, _"and the park is laid out like a bed below. It's a cold, dark night, and my heart melts like the snow…and the bells of New York City tell me not to go…"_ The piano resounded, the sound of the clock haunting Preston once again before he cried out his frustrations delicately on an elongated _"oo,"_ Botan's playing shifting to accompany him and take him where he needed to go.

Hiei got up from his spot at the desk while the instruments played a small interlude. He looked out the makeshift window to look at the snow, his hand pressed firmly on the side panel. His eyes narrowed, his expression sullen. _"It's always this time of year that my thoughts undo me with the ghosts of many lifetimes all abound,"_ Hiei sang, symbolizing the torment of past winters with nothing but his broken family for company, _"but from these mad heights I can always hear the sound of the bells of New York City singing all around."_ As if to prove his point, the piano and flutes acted as those bells before another moan on _"oo"_ fled his lips.

He walked across the room, gripping the desk as he looked down at the letter. _"Stay with me,"_ he pleaded, _"stay with me."_ His hand grazed over the letter, his eyes glowing in the firelight. _"A refuge from these broken dreams."_ He turned back to the window behind him, gripping the sill tightly, as he imagined watching people walking through the snow-covered park. _"Wait right here, oh, wait with me on silent snow-filled streets."_ A violin ended the line, the note containing a hopeless tinge.

A pause existed as the instruments held their notes, and Hiei took a breath and turned back appearing to be filled with determination, his stance proud and tall. _"Sing to me one song for joy and one for redemption,"_ he demanded, tilting his head upward slightly and crossing his arms, _"and whatever's in between that I call mine."_ His voice increased in volume practically shouting out, and his gaze went back to the window, _"With the street lamp light to illuminate the gray…"_

" _And the bells of New York City calling me to stay..."_

He was taking in the city, the instrumental fury creating a whirlwind, and the fake snow swirled in kind. His voice rang out loud and clear, surrendering to the call. _"The bells of New York City…calling me to stay!"_

He turned again and grabbed Hope's letter, this time singing the _"oo's"_ for a longer time, the instruments playing along and accompanying the unrestrained emotions Preston was feeling as he tossed the note from his beloved away in the trash, the voice, flutes, and piano holding together until the song ended and the stage was cast in darkness.

* * *

Following rehearsal, Botan and Hiei had decided to grab dinner together at a nice Italian place that was on campus. The two had been engaged in light conversation, though it was sort of one-sided considering Hiei was on the other side of it. He listened intently, occasionally grunting and even rarer responding with something of substance. Either way, Botan was happy to be with him. Even though the two had slept together, nothing was awkward. Hiei acted as if everything was normal. Honestly, Botan felt like it was regardless, her love for him coming out in her tone and not so much in her words.

Of course, she couldn't help but commend him for his performance. She could hear him so well as he sang along with her playing. Honestly, once the music had ended, Botan had felt awed and honored to be the one to play for him. The two of them made a wonderful team, and yet she had to admit it was because of Hiei's zeal. "You were amazing today," Botan told him, sincere in tone. Hiei paused in eating his salad. "I mean it. You were so passionate in your solo, and it went so well and sounded so beautiful. I think that's the best song in the play, although…" A sadness took over her.

Hiei's brow furrowed. "What is it?" he asked, though he already had assumed what her answer would be, and he was correct.

"It just breaks my heart," she replied, her amethyst eyes on his and her brow creased in concentration. She was trying to force herself not to break down with emotion. "It just saddens me. It's heart-wrenching to know what your parents went through, and that your father could make that decision…" She had glanced down at the food in front of her, glowering, but then she looked back to her stoic boyfriend and flashed him a weak smile. "But I do feel better knowing that the story will have a happier ending."

Botan went back to eating, not noticing that Hiei's expression grew grim. Yes, he had lied to Botan saying that his parents had been awarded a happy ending. He knew it was the furthest thing from the truth. For a moment, it seemed cruel to let Botan believe it when the ending would prove otherwise. He had to tell her, even if he wasn't ready, and now seemed like the perfect moment. He didn't care about surprising the woman like the rest of the cast. She deserved to know the truth about his life. "Botan…"

Her disarming smile silenced him. "What?" she murmured warmly, her eyes alit with an emotion Hiei couldn't describe or understand. He quickly regretted his decision.

Instead, he reminded her, "Next rehearsal you have your own solo." _The finale._

"I know," she giggled. "And I'm excited and all, but come on, Hiei. Can you tell me anything about the final scene?" As a joke she added. "I'm getting a little desperate…and nervous. I need to rehearse it. It took me forever to memorize the other scenes."

Hiei did not trust his voice, so he simply took Botan's hand, both distracting her and reassuring her. She was feeling much better until a wave of nausea washed over her. "Oh no," she moaned weakly.

Her boyfriend's expression was full of confusion. "What's wro-?"

Botan rushed off to the bathroom before Hiei could finish asking his question. As quick as she was, Hiei followed closely behind her, waiting outside the bathroom door. He held it open slightly, not entering, but he needed to make sure his girlfriend wasn't hurt. "Botan?" he called gently. "Are you all right?" His answer came soon after as he heard Botan retching in the public bathroom. Concern flickered across his crimson irises. _Was_ she okay?

The woman took a deep breath after the contents of her stomach had been emptied, her breathing still ragged regardless. She pushed strands of blue from her face and leaned against the cool stall. "I'm fine," she responded quietly before laughing weakly. This wasn't the right time to tell him about the baby, so she added, "Maybe I ate something bad earlier."

Hiei wasn't reassured by that. "I could take you home if you would like," he offered. He didn't care if their meal hadn't come yet. Botan needed to rest, and he was prepared to walk out.

"I think that would be best," Botan sighed. "I'm sorry…"

"Don't apologize for being sick," Hiei admonished. "That's not something you can help. Take your time. I'll go settle the bill for what we have eaten. Then we'll go back to the apartment."

"Okay."

Hiei left her for the moment so she could get her bearings. The further he got away from her, the more his heart ached. He had only ever been around the sick when his mother had been ill, and watching the woman deteriorate had been painful. He knew that Botan probably had a bug, but it did not settle him. Now that he had let her into his life so much, now that he knew what he felt for her, seeing, or rather hearing, her get that sick made his stomach churn with anxiety. He wanted her to be okay. He wouldn't leave her until he knew she was safe at home.

* * *

Botan was thankful that Hiei drove her car back to the apartments. She was still feeling a bit queasy and was trying to focus on not getting sick again. She hated the feeling of acid burning her throat. It was a highly unpleasant feeling.

Hiei had led her in after she unlocked the door, Yukina already in for the night. He brought her to her room, Botan immediately climbing into her bed. Hiei kissed her forehead to comfort her, and she smiled cuddling into the blankets. His eyes still conveyed his worry as he asked, "Do you want me to stay with you for the night?"

She reached out for him, still smiling, and hugged his rigid form. As she released him, she voiced, "You've helped me enough for one day. I should be fine by tomorrow for rehearsal; I promise."

Hiei kissed her forehead again, lingering there for a few extra seconds. Botan could feel his warmth and love in the gesture and sighed, relaxing. "Good night, Botan."

"Good night, Hiei," she whispered. He left soon after.

As Hiei left and walked away from the apartments, he couldn't help but feel anxiety towards Botan's condition. His heart still ached at the thought that she was in pain. He couldn't believe that she had brought up rehearsal. She was so selfless, always. It was one of the qualities that he loved about her, but it aggravated him this time. How could she think about him and his show when she was ill and in pain? Heaven help him as he dared to think that she had reminded him so much of both his mother and sister…they had always looked out for his emotional wellbeing even when sick and saddened. Why couldn't any of them focus or have focused on themselves for a change?

He made a mental promise to not overtax his girlfriend the next day. He'd keep her solo on the backburner and focus on scenes where she was barely needed. She could rest that way. If she was going to look out for him, then he would reciprocate and look out for her.

It was the least he could do.

* * *

A/N: Hey everyone! I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Just an ending author's note here. I know we're like fourteen chapters in, but I have a question. What do you think about me creating a playlist on YouTube containing the songs I've used in the story? I don't know if I'd be able to find all of the songs, but the idea hit me the other day. Let me know what you think.


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the song "Set Fire to the Rain" by Adele.

So, surprise, surprise! I didn't expect to update this one until December. I had the chapter waiting, but in honor of the unveiling of my commissioned cover, I felt the need to update. Special thanks to LacieRhea on DeviantArt (GoodEnoughTheOpenDoor on FFN) for the beautiful cover and what will also be my current profile picture. So, without further ado, let's get to another unveiling!

* * *

Today was the day, the airing of the final scene for the cast, and Hiei was feeling incredibly pleased with himself. His guilt at keeping Botan in the dark couldn't even get in the way of his proud moment. He could already see the stunned looks of his cast in his mind, and that would be exactly what he would have done to his audience. He was excited for this.

Though he had had his doubts enacting this play, Botan had made it all the easier, and he was thankful she was his costar. He didn't think he would have been able to tolerate anyone else let alone date them. Botan had become his girlfriend in spite of their rocky start. He remembered when he had met her by chance at the welcoming party, how he had chosen to dance with her to keep her from being eaten alive. He didn't think much of her then, had believed her to be depthless, but he had been proven wrong time and time again. Botan was a girl who had difficulties with awarding trust, much like himself, and he had slowly been shedding those barriers away. Any negative thoughts he ever held towards the woman had died a long time ago, and he was proud to have her in his corner through all of this. He knew that today would change everything for she would find out the truth about his life, but he felt ready for it. She would never judge him, he was certain, even if she didn't like the ending of the play.

At least they would get through the play that day. Once the whole cast knew this was the final scene, they could delve into the dress rehearsals, and they would be ready by the time the month was over and the show would finally air to the public. Everything was coming together.

Botan looked over her lines one final time just to settle her nerves for her solo. She basically knew the whole show and the music inside and out. It was only natural since she and Hiei spent so much time working on the play together. Honestly, she was excited for when they would work on the final scene. It still saddened her that she didn't know how his parents' story ended. Both Hiei and Yukina were very tightlipped about it. She knew they had a difficult life, and she could only assume that something happened to both of their parents. She knew their mother had been sick, but she knew nothing of the father. Had he been sick too?

She shook her head free of thoughts. Hiei probably wouldn't have gone that in-depth in his show for all to see, but she figured once she knew the rest of his parents' romance, the more open Hiei might be to discussing what happened with them. Botan held a very deep hope that Preston and Hope, or really Hiei's parents, had received their happy ending after everything they had endured together. Kurama called curtain, and she took a deep breath to center herself. It was finally her scene, her solo. She got out on stage, ready to perform.

Botan didn't have to do much to start, acting out that Hope was ow living on her own and checking her mailbox. It had been clear that she wasn't in the best living conditions, tossed out by her mother after she had admitted to being pregnant with another man's child. Hope had sent Preston countless letters, in one letter informing him they had twins as the narrator's voice was orating. She had asked if he would be there for the birth. A sad look flashed over her face when she realized she received no letters back. In her mind, she was fully beginning to accept, as painful as it was, that Preston had fully abandoned her and her twins. Regrettably, she was on her own.

As she closed the mailbox, the piano began to play a solemn melody, and Botan held her hands to heart. _"I let it fall, my heart, and as it fell you rose to claim it,"_ she sang. _"It was dark, and I was over until you kissed me lips and you saved me."_

She faced out to the audience, her hands balled into fists as she shook slightly. _"My hands, they're strong, but my knees were far too weak to stand in your arms without falling to your feet."_ Hope accepted that Preston had lied to her. _"But there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew. All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true. And they games you'd play, you would always win, always win._

And then the music crescendoed and Botan looked out to the audience with a determined glint in her eyes. _"But I set fire to the rain, watched it pour as I touched your face, let it burn while I cry 'cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!"_

After her powerful cry, the music's volume rescinded once again to the soft melody. Botan walked away from the mailbox, center stage looking up as if she were looking up to the sky with hopeful eyes as Hope confessed just how much Preston had meant to her and changed her with promises of a bright future. _"While laying with you, I could stay there, close my eyes, feel you here forever, you and me together nothing gets better."_

But then that glint returned to her eyes, acknowledging that the promises were empty. _"'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew. All the things you'd say they were never true, never true. And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win…"_

And once again she belted out, outstretching her arms at her sides while bearing her heart up to the sky. _"But I set fire to the rain, watched it pour as I touched your face, let it burn while I cried 'cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name."_

She looked down towards the audience again, noticing the shocked looks on all of her costars' faces, her voice still equally fierce as she continued. _"I set fire to the rain, and I threw us into the flames, where I felt something die 'cause I knew that that was the last time, last time…"_

The piano pacified a bit, Botan's voice growing softer, holding her hands clasped together over her chest. _"Sometimes I wake up by the door,"_ she murmured weakly. " _That heart you caught must be waiting for you."_ She grew angry with herself, her brow furrowing as she scolded herself. _"Even now, when it's already over, I can't help myself from looking for you!"_

And, once again, for the last time, Botan cried out the refrain, this time with more passion and more despair than the first two times. _"I set fire to the rain, watched it pour as I touched you face, let it burn while I cried 'cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name! I set fire to the rain, and I threw us into the flames, where I felt something die 'cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time!"_ She sang the rest of the song with a series of cries and repeatedly begging to _"let it burn."_ On the last, _"let it burn,"_ Botan held the note until the end of the song, both her voice and the piano cutting out at the same time, the notes resonating in the theater as Botan froze and the stage light went out. The last thing the audience saw was Botan's hand on her abdomen.

Hiei was even more taken aback by how well Botan handled her solo, awed by the emotion she brought to the role of his mother. Where he had already accepted this, this served as a reminder that he couldn't have casted the role any better, that the life he saw in Botan when she was alone in the chorus room was her true spirit, and he was glad that she had given into his demands that day despite her apprehension. He blinked himself back to reality, calling cut, and then, he dropped the bombshell that that was that finale.

The reaction was unanimous, pure shock, even from his normally unmoved friend. Kurama's face contorted with worry as he looked back to Botan who was just as startled. The announcement had affected her deeply. Her eyes were very telling as they glistened with unshed tears. The rest of the cast members were awed, speechless over the performance, but even more so by Hiei's confession. It was at that moment, one of the background dancers had stood up and began his raucous applause. It caused everyone to follow suit, even Botan's understudy, Koto, giving Hiei's costar her rightful standing ovation.

But Botan was still horrified for she knew more about the play than anyone else. Hiei hadn't told the cast that this was the story of his life. They assumed he had just written some masterpiece that they all were impressed by and loved, but Botan was closer. Yukina had been the one to tell her it was their parent's backstory, but Botan never expected that their mother's story would end with such heartache. The worst part was that the woman had grown ill and left behind two children, two _parentless_ children, and Hiei was then forced to live on the street. He was a survivor, but now Botan knew even more to the story. He hadn't just been a survivor. He had been alone, all alone with barely any guidance.

And now she understood why he was so callous and guarded most of the time.

Her eyes shifted to Hiei who was smirking proudly, his arms crossed. He was so proud of this play, and yet Botan could feel many other emotions radiating from her boyfriend. This was no doubt the kind of enamored hype he hoped to cause before the curtain would fall on his opening night. It was when his eyes met hers that his expression went grim, Hiei noticing the tears in her eyes that were threatening to fall.

He dismissed everyone for the day, instructing them on when to return for dress rehearsals with the full set. The students all clamored amongst themselves as they made their way out of the theater. Hiei didn't take his eyes off Botan, and Kurama looked between the two of them. "I take it that I am dismissed as well?" the redhead stated more than asked.

"Yes," Hiei replied.

Kurama offered his friend a weak smile. "Then I will see you later, my friend. I wish you the best."

"Hn," Hiei grunted, making his way towards the stage.

He gently took Botan's hand, entwining their fingers together as he led her out into the hall from backstage. This was new territory for him. Hiei was never one to discuss his past even with those he trusted. Botan was different. "I apologize for blindsiding you," he stated once they were in the lit hallway. "It was always my goal, before we…, I intended from the beginning to reveal the ending this way, and I had no desire to change how I do things."

"I-I understand," Botan stammered nervously. "Just…it…it wasn't what I expected at all. You said there was more. You told me…"

"I know what I said," Hiei replied a bit abruptly before sighing. "Botan, as you just learned, this is a difficult topic for me to discuss. Not only did I want the ending to be a surprise, but I wasn't ready to tell you. I wasn't ready to admit the entirety of my past to someone I care about. I wasn't ready to tell you what hardships I had to endure. Do you understand?"

Botan nodded, huddling closer to Hiei, leaning against him. Seconds later, Hiei could feel the woman's body shaking in his arms, Botan crying out her sadness for him, for his sister, and for his mother. That's what she told him when he asked her in a hushed whisper what had her this upset. After she admitted that the pain she felt was for them, Hiei kissed her forehead, and he assured her that the bastard who left them was unneeded.

That led to the two of them sitting, their backs pressed up against the wall, as they discussed Hiei's past. Botan asked him how Hiei had handled his childhood. Her boyfriend confessed a lot to her that day, mainly about his rage and hatred toward the man he had never met and his despair over losing his mother. He knew that his mother struggled with depression over losing the "love of her life," and she had no desire to really be with anyone. When she had fallen ill, she only had her children to help her, and Hiei knew from the way his mother stared at him that he looked like the man who left. He remembered her holding his hand one night, pleading with him to come back, as if he were the ghost of her lover. Hiei had distanced himself from her then, leaving Yukina to tend to the woman when she was delirious like that.

Botan had drawn him in for a kiss after he shared all of his pain. He had expressed words he never told to anyone, explained the reason why he chose acting as a profession. He needed to get off and stay off the street. Where he could handle himself in a street fight, it wasn't the healthiest lifestyle. He had ended up being brought in by a man named Shigure who taught him the ropes of the thespian world. Hiei learned dance, music theory, instrumentals, and singing, and he was good at all of it. It made Shigure want to keep the young actor around until he was able to stand on his own two feet.

"Your father is an idiot for giving up all of you," Botan whispered against his lips after pulling away. "He missed out on getting to know a wonderful, strong man. You're right. You don't need him." Hiei's eyes softened, his grip tightening in Botan's hair. "You're so much better than him."

Hiei never felt the need to be validated in his life. He already knew he was better than that half a man, and anyone else's opinion mattered very little to him other than critics for he needed to be hyped up in his line of work. In that moment, though, when Botan's sweet and sincere words met his ears, he felt immense pleasure, and a feeling burst inside him, causing him to growl deeply in approval as he crashed his lips to hers. He needed her, right then and then, guiding her backstage, taking her, allowing her to erase whatever hurts he still secretly felt from his past. The woman didn't stop him.

* * *

The two were spent, lying backstage against each other, covered by Hiei's jacket. Botan's head lied against his chest, relaxing as she felt it rise and fall with each breath. Her eyes were wide open, a blush on her cheeks. She had never done anything like this before. If anything, she and Hiei always went back to her room and he'd spend the night. The woman didn't expect to perform such an intimate act with her boyfriend in such a public place. Truthfully, she hadn't expected it from him, either, since he was absolutely against PDAs and anyone could show up at the theater at any second. Still, neither moved to retrieve their clothes, both relaxed and content.

It was then, in that moment, that Botan realized she felt completely safe. Even if someone were to find them, no harm would come to her even in the form of slanderous words because she knew Hiei would defend her. She now knew of his backstory and felt confident broaching the subject of children. It was just the two of them now. It was time for her to confess to Hiei about their child.

"Hiei," Botan murmured her lover's name. "Have you ever thought about having children?"

The question made Hiei's blood run cold, his hand that was rubbing lazy circles on the woman's back freezing with him. His voice sounded troubled as he asked, "Why would you bring that up?"

Botan was actually startled by Hiei's agitation given all that he had just admitted to her. She didn't expect an abrupt question like that and hoped for a discussion. The tone he had made her nervous, once again, to admit the truth, so she led the conversation a different way. "It's nothing," she lied, and Hiei visibly relaxed immensely. That left Botan feeling wary as she added, "I was just wondering."

Hiei's eyes hardened slightly as he considered how to answer Botan's question. It wasn't that he had anything against children, really, but he never imagined being a father. He decided to just be honest with Botan. She always was with him. "I've never wanted children," he conveyed, and he noticed Botan's dismay. He reached his thumb to massage her cheek. "It's not what you think, though. The reason is mainly due to my past. I do not feel that I would have anything to offer a child. It was always just me, always being responsible for myself, on my own, and I would not want to bring a child into that or be responsible for one." Botan's brow furrowed, and Hiei sighed. "I am not a good role model for a kid given some of the things I had to do in the past before I became an actor." Now, his girlfriend just look sad, and Hiei didn't know how to make that sadness go away. "I'm sorry, Botan," he admitted, "for saying it now and not mentioning it before, but I don't want kids at all, not now, not ever."

As those words left his mouth, Botan started crying, and Hiei felt his insides twist. The way her voice cracked as she sobbed indicated that she was more than upset. He knew that was probably a conversation they should have had a long time ago, but the thought never occurred to him since they always used protection. When Botan said it was nothing, he thought she meant it. He could think of no reason what she would be this upset. He was smart, though, and he knew, thanks to her despaired wails, that they were not going to stay together. There was no way they could survive this if she truly wanted a family.

His griped tightened on her for a brief moment, but Botan surprised him when she unexpectedly slapped him across the face. Hiei saw red as he gripped his cheek. Her action had both shocked and demoralized him, and he had done absolutely nothing to warrant that behavior. He glared at the woman, snapping, "What was that for?"

Amethyst eyes narrowed in pure anger. She hadn't thought she would ever feel that way about the man she loved, but when she heard his callous words it did something. There was no way she could tell him the truth now, not when he had told her had did not want a child with her. "Everything you just said, it's selfish," she accused, pulling away from Hiei and rushing to gather her clothes and dress herself. She put her clothes back on so quickly and went to leave Hiei backstage.

"Where do you think you're going?" Hiei demanded.

The distraught woman stopped at the door leading back to the hallway, her form shaking as she forced out a statement through her tears. "I can't be with someone who feels that way about a child," she informed him as calmly as she could. "This…this is over." It seemed that despite how much Hiei had gone through, he wasn't much different from his father after all. Botan would not expose her child to that kind of torment.

Hiei wasn't shocked that Botan left him, but when she disappeared from sight, he felt empty. He went through the motions of getting himself dressed, and he felt incredibly low. He wondered how this had happened, how such a great day had turned so wrong. He also wondered why she didn't stay to talk this all out and why she got so upset. It was actually a common occurrence nowadays for people not to want to have children. Besides, it wasn't like they had to worry about it in the presence. Botan had said she was just wondering, so she had strictly been speaking about the future. Hiei shook his head, no longer wanting to think about it anymore as he slipped his hands into his pockets and made his way back to his dorm room, his expression impassive. He could not wrap his mind around the fact that his relationship was over.

* * *

Botan returned to the apartment in tears. She was completely devastated and heartbroken. It hurt her deeply that Hiei was so against having children. There was no way she could tell him about the baby now. She didn't think she could take that kind of rejection.

Yukina was in the living area sitting and waiting when Botan came in, and she noticed how upset her friend was. The woman approached her. Botan was about to ask if she could be alone, but she noticed what Yukina was holding. It was her positive pregnancy test. Yukina had probably taken out the garbage that day. Botan's eyes met Yukina's, and it hit her just how much they resembled her twin's. Hers were softer, though, and full of worry.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Yukina asked kindly.

Asking Botan that caused the blue-haired woman to go to Yukina, hugging her tightly as she broke down sobbing. That night she told Yukina everything, about the play, about Hiei, including what her brother had just said. She admitted to breaking up with Hiei, and thankfully Yukina didn't fight her. The girl just listened, gently rubbing her back. At least Botan didn't feel as alone, but she knew this wouldn't last. Yukina was Hiei's sister. She couldn't take her away from Hiei. After this breakdown, she realized that she was going to have to go through this heartache alone.

* * *

A/N: Well, it couldn't all be happiness and rainbows. I know no one was expecting this for a chapter this close to Thanksgiving. I honestly wasn't prepared to share it. In light of the new cover art, though, I wanted to update and this happened to be the chapter we landed on. I planned on updating at the beginning of December. But rest assured, Chapter 16 is in the works, and I will be ready to post that one at the beginning of November, so just bear with me! This ride isn't over yet!


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters.

And I am back! I know last update was a huge bombshell, so I can't leave you hanging. Just know, there's not much longer to wait. That's right! I have the rest of the story completed, and it will end in just a few chapters with a lot of surprises, twists, and turns along the way. So please enjoy the chapter though it has a somber tone. I promise, it will be well worth it, and you will have the ending before the new year!

* * *

Since that day backstage, Hiei had not heard from Botan or seen her except for rehearsals. He was angry with the woman for ending things without an explanation. Part of him was starting to believe that maybe he was initially right about her and that people from her town did have a reputation for drama, but then he'd see her at rehearsals. She would stay far away from him except when they were on stage, and she looked so desolate. When it was time for her to speak or sing, she was very quiet. The cast was starting to wonder what happened with the girl. Some were actually worried that they had actually dared to go to Hiei to ask to take a break from rehearsals.

Hiei refused.

Kurama noticed Botan's solemnity. Lately, Hiei had been despondent as well, and he had been held up in their room. One night, the redhead heard their other roommate demanding to know what Hiei had said to his sister. He heard his friend snap at the man asking him what the girl had told him. When Kuwabara said nothing and explained that she was hardly coming out of her room, Hiei seemed surprised, but he growled a, "not my problem," and then locked himself in the room.

Botan was so angry with herself, and she knew Hiei was angry with her too. Of course, she had more of a reason to be angry. Hiei had been so callous and selfish in regards to children, and Botan just couldn't handle the emotions that came with the knowledge that she was pregnant with his child. Yukina had listened to her that night she had broken up with Hiei, but Botan had not spoken to her since. As always, Yukina was understanding, but she believed Botan should tell Hiei the truth. Botan was horrified. There was no way she could tell Hiei. She couldn't handle the rejection she would face, and she would never recover if Hiei told her he did not want the child knowing that there was a child. Botan made Yukina swear not to tell Hiei or her own brother. Her roommate was hesitant, but she agreed. Still, Botan had withdrawn a lot, mainly because she felt like she _shouldn't_ talk to anyone about this. She knew Yusuke and her brother were worried about her, and Yukina kept trying to offer comfort, but she didn't want the help they were offering. She just needed time to think, alone.

Hiei was growing irritated with the woman. The whole week, rehearsals were atrocious. It was not his problem if she couldn't get passed her emotions. She caused this rift between them, and this time Hiei didn't care if she wasn't a professional actress. She needed to get it together.

During one of their scenes, she ended up running off stage in the middle, her face alarmed, and Hiei had chosen to follow her. He was going to drag her back there if he had to, not caring about her damned empathy crap. To his surprise, she had gone straight for the bathroom, and he had a sense of déjà vu from one of their most recent dates. His brow furrowed in concern. Was she _still_ sick? He thought she said she was fine, that she had just eaten something terrible. He heard her sobbing when she had finally stopped retching, and his heart ached. Though he was still sore over the breakup, this reminded him of something he couldn't deny.

Hiei still loved her.

Returning to the auditorium, he dismissed everyone, and he finally decided to cancel rehearsals. Botan had shown up right in time to hear that. She had asked him why he'd do that. Hiei wanted so much to just reach out for her and apologize for his callousness, but his pride overwrote his senses.

"It's necessary," he stated stoically. "This week has been a travesty." His hardened eyes met her nervous ones. "Hopefully, a week is all you'll need. I don't care what's going on between us. You better get your act together."

Tears fills Botan's eyes over Hiei's criticism, his words and demeanor unforgiving. She ended up running away from him, openly weeping, unable to meet his gaze again. Even if she had, the warmth his eyes usually held for her were not there. In actuality, though, he had to do everything to ignore the pang in his chest over seeing her distressed. This was of her own doing, anyway.

* * *

A couple of days had passed, and Hiei wasn't feeling any better. He realized he that he had been acting petty, and he was aware that he had purposefully been punishing Botan for a misunderstanding that he had also created. Seeing how broken she was over their separation had sobered him, and he spent the past days thinking about how she must have been feeling. He decided that he needed to talk to Botan, at least explain that he didn't detest her. They were still costars, and they were friends. They could make this work, somehow. He wanted to.

The music room was normally where he'd find her, but she didn't seem to ever be when he showed up. He knew she had to be rehearsing there for her recital was coming up soon, sometime before the play. It was possible that she was rehearsing in her room, but Botan knew what he did. She needed to practice on a real piano and not her keyboard. There was no way she hadn't been here.

 _Her recital…_ Hiei thought to himself. She had been so excited over it for weeks. Memories of the day she invited him came back in full color. They had finished rehearsal, and Hiei had taken her out for ice cream after. A smile was on her face as she silently licked her childish favorite, a cotton candy cone with rainbow sprinkles. He had asked her what had her grinning like a Cheshire cat. She then told him that her advisor had told her the date of the recital, and then she had said she wanted him there. Botan hadn't even invited Yusuke or Kuwabara or anyone else. She just wanted him.

It seemed so long ago even though it had just been a few weeks prior. The couple had been full of so much joy, and Hiei had grown comfortable being so close to another. Trust was hard to come by for Hiei, and he had entrusted his to her and vice versa. Even now, he still planned to go to the recital. Botan still needed support. She still needed a friend. Hiei knew more than anyone that she didn't have many of those. Neither did he for that matter.

"Botan!" he heard his sister's voice shout in alarm as she pushed through the doors of the chorus room only to find her brother there alone. "Oh, hello, Hiei," she greeted awkwardly. Hiei noticed a bento box in a bag. He had no doubt Yukina had brought that for his ex… _Ugh, even thinking that feels wrong…_ "Have you seen Botan anywhere? She left without her lunch."

Hiei had to force the gut-wrenching feeling that accompanied the thought that Botan wasn't eating. "The room was empty."

A sigh escaped his twin. "She must be home, then," she murmured regrettably. Instead of leaving, like Hiei expected her to, Yukina set the bento down on a table and walked over to him. "Now that you're here, though…" she started, "I really need to talk to you."

"About what?" Hiei questioned, though he had a feeling he knew what his twin wanted.

"Botan told me what happened, what was said…"

"Stay out of it, Yukina," Hiei ordered gruffly. "Botan made her choice, and that is the end of that."

"Hiei…" his sister murmured. "You have to know why. Botan is-"

Hiei swallowed thickly. "I do not wish to hear it," he stated. "This doesn't concern you."

Yukina was not surprised by Hiei's attitude, but she knew he would not let her speak. The woman truly believed her brother should know about his and Botan's child, but he was just as stubborn as Botan was. She could do nothing but watch him walk away. Hiei didn't even look back as he left his solemn sister behind.

* * *

It was another day at the dorm when Kuwabara accosted Hiei. The older man refused to let Hiei go this time, almost screaming at him demanding to know what his roommate did to his sister. Hiei had told him it wasn't his business and had to dodge a fist that was thrown his way. "She's my sister, you bastard!" Kuwabara hissed. "That makes it my business. What the heck did you say to her? She was practically catatonic when I went to visit her. Do you know what it's like seeing your baby sister so depressed? She wouldn't even look at me! How could you do that to her?"

Hiei's lips pursed firmly into a line, his concern for the woman peaking. She was isolating herself. Sure, she had broken up with her and that didn't sit well with him, but she didn't deserve to be alone with no one in her corner. "It wasn't my decision," Hiei explained as calmly as he could. "Your _baby sister_ was the one who broke up with me. Again I say, it isn't any of your business."

"Again I say, it is my business," Kuwabara remarked. "My sister is in pain, and I want to know why."

Yusuke had also been there. It surprised him that Botan had ended her relationship with Hiei. Her best friend knew that Botan had been so happy being with Hiei that it didn't make sense to him. He determined that Hiei's attitude was due to his own hurt. "Hey, come on, Kuwabara," he attempted to pacify. "Maybe you should give him a break."

Kuwabara's glare turned completely on Yusuke, the older brother seething. "You stay out of this, Urameshi!" he snapped. "Just get out of here. Botan doesn't concern you."

The man's statement triggered something inside Yusuke. He finally had enough. "Look, I screwed up, and I know that. I've put up with your attitude for years now just because I care so damn much about your sister. You have no right to talk to me that way."

" _I_ have no right?" Kuwabara bitterly probed. "You're a real piece of work, you know that? Botan is _my_ sister, _my_ family. So you better watch it."

Angry over Kuwabara's words, Yusuke snapped at the man. This lead to a fight between them. Hiei actually felt he had lucked out. Yusuke's nosy interruption allowed Hiei to slip away into the safety of his room for the night. Thankfully, he could avoid the overprotective big brother. His emotions were already all over the place. He didn't wish to discuss his business or his emotions with that redhead.

"What was all that commotion about?"

Hiei sneered and growled. Or any redhead.

"I am in no mood to entertain your meddlesome curiosity," Hiei remarked. "But if you must know, Botan and I have broken up."

Kurama instantly looked up from the novel he was reading, his expression impassive, but his eyes full of alarm as his gaze shifted to his brooding friend. "You're serious," he stated, but his voice still held a disbelieving hint. "I take it there is a reason. I've seen no other couple as better suited as you two."

Hiei scoffed and looked away, his arms crossed as he brought his guard up. "There is a reason, and it was not something I anticipated. I informed her of my desire to never have children and she ended it right there."

Though the reason was out in the opened, Kurama's brow furrowed. It didn't seem like that would be right. Botan seemed to be a very understanding woman, and most likely she could see the effect she had on his friend. Hiei had been changing his outlook on many aspects of life. She had to know that even if Hiei had said this now at this stage in his life, that their relationship could rise above that and he would probably change his mind later when he was passed the past. "Are you sure that's the real reason?"

The actor huffed and glared at the redhead. "That is the only reason I have. Botan left after and I haven't seen her or spoken to her outside of rehearsal?" He started walking over to his bed, climbing the ladder.

But Kurama's interrogation wasn't over. "Then how do you know it's over?"

Hiei snorted as he laid down, hands behind his head, and leg crossed over his knee. "Other than the fact that she said 'this is over?'"

"She was emotional, I assume," Kurama deduced correctly, and Hiei was actually rather bothered that he could so easily do that. "Just give her some time, and make sure she knows you are still there for her. Try to talk to her, Hiei. It will help and maybe smooth over the issue. You'll regret it if you don't try to find out what had her so upset."

"Intrusive fox," Hiei hissed under his breath, but he couldn't deny that he really did want to understand why Botan had decided to end it in that moment. Maybe there was more to her reaction. "Don't you have something better to do than hover over me?"

"My apologies," Kurama returned, a patient smile gracing his features. He stood up from his chair and made his way to the door. "I will leave you to your thoughts."

Once alone, door shut tight behind the redhead thankfully blocking out the screaming match still going on in the other room, Hiei immediately reached for his phone. He rubbed his thumb over the blank screen wondering what he would say to Botan. Usually, he was so calculating, rehearsed, but with Botan he didn't have a script and he had no idea what to anticipate. Still, he had to make the attempt. He dialed her number, waiting for her to answer. Botan, of course, happened to ignore his call.

He forced himself not to react and be angry. Honestly, she probably thought he was going to berate her some more like he did after their last rehearsal. Maybe she needed a little space, like Kurama said. Well, he'd grant her that space, for the next twenty-four hours. After that, he was going to talk to her. He planned to go over to the apartment the next day and force the woman to have a mature discussion with him. Maybe then he could learn what he did or said to set her off so much. The next day he'd have answers.

* * *

The following day proved to be very chaotic. It started out normally, the only chaos existing inside Botan's heart and mind. She was still trying to avoid everyone in her life, overwhelmed both by the secret only Yukina knew and the grief over her lost relationship. Getting sick every night didn't seem to help her much either. She looked like she hadn't slept for days and her face was so pale. It was a horrible feeling to be going through this heartbreak while being physically ill. Each of the ailments played off of the other. Something needed to give soon, or she didn't think she could make it through the semester.

"Botan!" she heard her best friend call. She looked up from her barely touched lunch and frowned at the smiling teen. Already, she could feel that he was feeling guarded, wary, and nervous despite his relaxed façade. He was clearly worried about her and had sought her out. Just the mere sight of him overcame her emotions. Tears had to be blinked back when she saw him. Instead, she busied herself, packing up her uneaten sandwich and chips.

"Hello, Yusuke," she greeted, her voice sounding tired and heavy with sadness. "How are you?"

"Never mind me," Yusuke murmured patiently. He placed his hand on her shoulder in a comforting gesture. "I'm worried about you. Where have you been? I haven't spoken to you in a while."

Botan frowned, her eyes full of guilt. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I just haven't felt up to going out."

"I heard," Yusuke replied, shocking his friend. "I overheard your brother giving Hiei a hard time and he told us about the breakup. Are you okay?"

This time, the tears fell and the sobs started. Yusuke panicked, especially when many eyes were on them. "Hey, hey!" he exclaimed. "C-Come on, Botan. Let's get you out of here, and we can talk." Botan weakly nodded, allowing Yusuke to lead her out of the cafeteria. She hadn't meant to put them on display, so she was thankful he took the hint to get her out of there while trying to comfort her. Of course, he would never understand how much his statement broke her.

Yes, she had been upset with Hiei, and no, they couldn't work anymore. Botan knew that logically that Hiei hadn't really caused her to feel this pain on purpose. She hadn't told him about the baby, and she had just asked his opinion. Still, knowing how adamant he was about it…she just couldn't tell him. Rejection was a harsh reality in her own family, and she hated it. She could not put her child in that position even if Hiei was willing to just deal with it. That was even if he wouldn't reject her like everyone else for this. She didn't think her heart could take that. It didn't mean she wanted Kazuma to give the man a hard time. She was the one who broke up with Hiei, not the other way around, even if Hiei had accidentally contributed to her heartache.

She didn't want to talk to Yusuke about it, didn't want to tell him about the baby. So once he got her somewhere private, she told him she just wanted a day where she didn't have to think about it. Her friend's expression softened before he forced a grin and told her "you got it." She was thankful when the subject was dropped.

Yusuke had tried really hard to keep her mind off of it, getting her to talk about her upcoming recital. She had been so excited for it, but the recent breakup had put a damper on her spirits. It was plain for Yusuke to see that discussing anything about the recital, play, or otherwise was a bit taboo, so he ended up catching her up on his semester. He was actually making an effort in his subjects which was so unlike him. The two of them actually started joking, and despite Botan's heavy heart she actually had a good time. That was until they reached the student center. Then all hell broke loose.

"Yusuke?"

Botan and Yusuke both froze when they heard a familiar and angry voice, and they both looked over at the source nervously. "Keiko?" Yusuke asked, clearly surprised. "What in the world are you doing here?"

His girlfriend crossed her arms, glaring at Botan with all the accusation in the world before the look was directed towards Yusuke. "What am _I_ doing here?" she asked indignantly. "I decided to come up to surprise you since my teacher canceled class today and I had a three day weekend. Little did I know _she'd_ be here picking up where she left off back in middle school."

Blue hair covered Botan's face as she dropped her head apologetically. "That's not what this is," she offered timidly. "We were just…"

"Save it, home-wrecker," Keiko slandered making Botan feel even smaller inside. She then looked to Yusuke. "You know how I feel about her. How could you see her behind my back like this?"

Yusuke cast Botan a worried glance. His friend looked like she was about to shatter, and he couldn't let that happen, not with how she was already suffering. He finally turned to Keiko and told her how it really was. "Keiko, enough," he demanded. When Keiko was about to snap, he added, "Botan isn't here visiting. She goes to school here." At that, Keiko looked completely betrayed. "I didn't want to tell you for this exact reason. Nothing is going on between Botan and me other than the fact that we are very good friends. I haven't cheated on you, and Botan would never do that to you and you know it."

Keiko's expression darkened. "So let me get this straight," she stated, offended. "You and Botan have been going to the same school, and this entire time you never told me because you were afraid of how I'd react and somehow I'm the bad guy in all of this?" She looked over to Botan who had yet to say anything to defend herself. "As if I'd believe anything either of you would say. Shame on you, Botan, for lying to me and for what you've done. You're the one who started this when you kissed Yusuke knowing I liked him. You're a terrible person!"

And the glass ceiling that had been holding Botan up shattered, the dam breaking as the woman burst. Tears were freely streaming down her face, and all she could think to do was stammer an apology to both of them. She ignored Yusuke trying to stop her from running away. Keiko had snapped at Yusuke to let her go, that they needed to talk. Botan just couldn't do this anymore. Everywhere she went, she was in the way, the cause of everyone's problem. She just needed to shut herself in. She should have never let Yusuke waste his time trying to help her. As she made it back to her apartment, she couldn't help but think that maybe her sisters were right, maybe Keiko was right. She didn't belong in the family, didn't look like any of them. She destroyed every friendship and relationship she had. She was a mistake.

She sniffled as she locked herself in her room, her hand going to her abdomen. "I'm sorry, baby," she whispered, "that you have such a train wreck for a mother." A new wave of sadness struck her then. She just wanted this day to end.

* * *

Back with Yusuke and Keiko, the brunette huffed and muttered a good riddance. She was taken aback when her boyfriend glared heatedly at her. "What?" she growled.

Yusuke scowled and shook his head. "I can't believe you said that to her," Yusuke sternly spoke. "Keiko, I'm sick and tired of this. I'm tired of you blaming Botan when she did nothing wrong."

"Oh not this again!" Keiko exclaimed, waving her hands in the air in exasperation. "I don't want to hear it, Yusuke. I told you-"

"I don't care, Keiko," Yusuke admitted, irritating the woman. "This time, you going to shut up and you're going to listen."

"How dare y-"

"I'm not done." Keiko crossed her arms and looked away from him, but she decided to stay silent. They had been dancing around this conversation for years, and this time Yusuke didn't seem like he'd let up. She could yell at him some more, but she just wanted to get on with it and let him say what he had to. Maybe then she'd have another leg to stand on once she finally had proof of Botan's treachery. "What happened in the past was not Botan's fault, and she never kissed me." Keiko's head snapped back to regard him with protest. Yusuke was deterred. "I was the one who kissed her," he admitted, his voice full of guilt.

Keiko's brows furrowed in confusion. What had he just said? This time, she wanted to hear his explanation. "What?"

"You heard me," he told her, "and I'm sorry for that." A sad sigh escaped him. "Keiko, I was pissed at you. I was going through some stuff at home, and you were nagging me and not being the most understanding woman." Keiko remembered when Yusuke finally told her about that time, and she frowned, feeling shame when she remembered how much she had hurt him then. "I was mad at you, and so I decided to hurt you, and that was wrong of me. I asked Botan out for lunch, but she thought we were just going as friends. She had been so patient and understanding, and in that moment it's what I needed. At first, I intended to hurt you, but when I kissed her I wasn't thinking of you. I got so swept up with emotion that I just kissed her. She was shocked, and she didn't kiss back. Then you showed up and got so upset. You have no idea, Keiko, how much Botan has tried to be understanding to you even though you never listened to her."

Keiko huffed. "Yeah, right," she scoffed, thought a part of her was still in shock about what Yusuke just told her. "She never cared how I felt. She had a crush on you. Her sister told me."

"Her sister is a liar," Yusuke countered before he released a deep breath. His eyes were lidded as he averted his eyes. "Look, Keiko, Botan has always tried to put you first. She and I almost lost our friendship because of what I did. She was prepared to live life without any friend in her corner. She wouldn't talk to me, wouldn't take my calls. Kuwabara hates me because Botan was so distraught during that time losing _both_ her best friends. Her sisters knew that when Botan was a kid, and I'm talking kid, Keiko, that she had a crush on me. She admitted it to me, and we both thought it was the funniest thing in the world because when we got older she only saw me as family, because her own treated her like crap. I was her brother and you were her sister. Her own sisters have been emotionally breaking her all these years, but you wouldn't know."

At the accusation in Yusuke's voice, Keiko started to feel like she needed to go on the defensive, but at the same time she looked like she felt just as responsible as Yusuke did. She looked off into the direction Botan ran in, her heart sinking. She really tried to distance Yusuke? For her? There was no way that could be true, but then Yusuke brought Kuwabara into the mix. The two had been so close, but one day Kuwabara looked at Yusuke with nothing but disdain. She knew the redhead loved all his sisters, and he was especially protective of Botan. Was that because of the rest of her family and how they treated her?

"The night Botan called me, that night you got so mad at me," Yusuke continued, "we had only just started talking again. I went to her, convinced her to talk to me and begged forgiveness. I couldn't live without my best friend, Keiko. It didn't mean that I didn't love you, but Botan was like my little sister. Knowing that I caused her so much pain and misery, I needed to make up for it. That night, Hinageshi was in the hospital. She just needed a friend. Today, when you saw us together…Botan's struggling really badly, Keiko. She was in a really serious relationship, and she just broke it off with the guy, one of my roommates, actually. She's been withdrawing. She wasn't talking to me, Kuwabara…no one. I just wanted to get her mind off of it and cheer her up because she's been a mess. You have no idea what you just did to her. You need to apologize to her. She was your best friend once, Keiko. Do you really want her to suffer for something she didn't do for the rest of her life?"

 _No…_ Keiko thought sadly, her eyes conveying her understanding. Yusuke could see that she felt awful for Botan and for her own actions when her brown eyes met his. Once again, she looked off into the direction Botan had fled and felt immense guilt at how she had reacted. All this time when Yusuke tried to explain what happened, she never wanted to listen. If she had, she could have salvaged her friendship with Botan instead of condemning her forever. Now, she had said something so hateful to a woman who only wanted best for her and caused the already downed teenager to look so defeated and destroyed. Botan had always been lighthearted and happy when they were younger, and now she seemed like a shadow of her former self. Keiko had wanted the cheater to be miserable, but that wasn't Botan, and she agreed with Yusuke. She really did need to apologize to the woman before she caused irreparable damage.

* * *

Hours later, Botan was thrilled to find that Yukina wasn't home. She had been crying all day and didn't need the other woman to think her brother had anything to do with this. Botan just felt like everything was spiraling out of control, and she didn't know how to stop it. When Keiko had said all of those things, it hurt, but what hurt more was that Botan truly believed the girl's words. She was terrible, worthless…. _Oh God,_ she thought as she wept. She just couldn't do this anymore.

Her sobs were so gut-wrenching, her abdomen tensed so much, that she ended up making herself sick. It was worse that, while she was hugging the toilet, she couldn't calm herself down in the least. Her forehead pressed against the porcelain when her body finally decided to give her a break. Her relief was short-lived when she heard a knock on the door. She released a groan. Why? Why couldn't everyone just leave her alone? She deserved to be alone.

Slowly, she got herself up off the floor and tried to clean herself up to the best of her ability. She looked terrible, pale…like she was on her deathbed. Some days, she felt like she was. She had to shake her head free of those thoughts and finally went to answer the door. It was the last person she wanted to see.

"Hiei!" she gasped out in horror, trying to close the door so she was only peeking out of the crack. "W-What are you doing here?"

Hiei's impassive gaze was on her, clearly sizing her up. It made her feel self-conscious and vulnerable, and she wanted nothing more than to tell him to leave. But she couldn't. It would only be fair for her day to include the man she loved destroying her like her former best friend had. It was just her luck that it was happening within the same hour.

While Botan was degrading herself, Hiei was actually trying to internalize his nerves so they wouldn't shine through. She looked terrible. He wasn't even thinking that in a mean way. The woman appeared to have been crying, for a long time if the redness of her eyes was to be believed. She looked like she was about to keel over in pain and sickness, and Hiei again was remembering the times he heard her getting sick. His brow furrowed in concern, though he was sure Botan perceived it as anger with how she backed even further away. What was this woman doing to herself?

Her eyes questioned him, and then he remembered he actually had been asked a question. He crossed his arms to guard himself and maintained eye contact. "You haven't answered my calls."

It was true, she knew. She hadn't. When Hiei called her the first time the evening before, Botan had thought about answering, but she kept picturing how angry and hateful he'd be. She made herself sick then, too. Yukina tried to help her, but Botan had emotionally pushed her away. She was determined to deal with this on her own without dragging any more people down. Already during the day she had ruined Yusuke's relationship. She wasn't about to do the same to Hiei. "C-Can we talk another time," she pleaded. Her voice sounded so far away and weak that Hiei's crimson eyes widened a fraction. "I've had an awful day and all I want to do is rest and maybe practice for my recital."

Hiei understood, and he nodded to agree and accept her terms. "Fine. We can talk after the recital. I'll be there."

Botan paled as she remembered the day she had invited him to come. She assumed that, after she ended things, Hiei would want to be as far away from her as possible. "Please don't come," she abruptly said, stunning Hiei in the process. Hurt flickered in his eyes and through his emotions, and Botan wanted to run away. "Please," she begged again, her voice cracking. "Just please don't. I don't want you there."

Hiei felt like his heart had been ripped out of him, and anger started to seep into what was left of it. His expression reflected his rage as Botan slammed the door in his face. How _dare_ she? He had been nice, agreeing to her terms about discussing all of this, and she had been a complete child about it. He had been nothing but concerned for her, and she had ended up being the callous one. Well, he was through playing the nice guy. As he left, he came to a conclusion on how to handle this. He was going to her recital, without a doubt, just to spite her. He didn't care about sparing her feelings, not anymore.


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the song "Bittersweet" by Jim Brickman or the song "Trust Me" by The Fray. Give the former a listen if you get a chance. The emotion in the piano piece is so strong, like his other songs that inspired many scenes of this story.

* * *

Hiei fixed his tie as he sat down in the theater, and his eyes gazed around at the other patrons of this recital. His entry had been free since he was a student, but there were many there to scout out new talent. There was also the random crowd that just appreciated the fine arts. He was one of them, but he could not enjoy any of it. The actor was only there for one reason.

To get to Botan.

He was dressed up and stewing in his seat and had no desire to watch all the other acts. Of course Botan had to be towards the end of the show. He didn't like being forced to endure all the others, but sticking it to Botan would be well worth it. Towards the end of the second hour, Botan finally took the stage, receiving loud applause. As much as she angered him, he decided not to begrudge her and joined the rest of the patrons reluctantly in their adulation.

His eyes never left her as she took a bow. She practically glided over to the piano, an apparition as her hands struck the keys for her first piece. She really did seem like a ghost in the distance, and Hiei could not help but marvel in her beauty. He could tell she was still worn, but she had managed to pull herself together for her big day. He would have been angry at her for looking that amazing if he hadn't felt the sadness in her music. All of the pieces she ever played him all had a solemn tone. He recognized them all, even the piece they had completed together sounding like a lovely dirge. No one else would have heard it like he did. They didn't know. It was starting to become too much for him, his hands unusually clammy. He tried to wipe his sweaty palms against his slacks.

He recognized all her songs, but he noticed that one was missing. It was the one she had written and sung to him, the one he had used in his show. That one, he had been looking forward to, but he realized she must not have trusted her voice. Instead, that song was replaced with one called "Bittersweet" in the program. Hiei felt his heart sink deeper inside of him as she began to play this replacement song, a violinist joining her on stage.

The piece started off soft and sad, wistful and forlorn. Botan poured her emotion, moving with her music as she played alone, solo. Her sadness was pouring off the stage, that even other patrons were feeling the beautiful hymn. The violinist joined in, adding a somber tone before Botan's playing became slightly brighter, as if remembering brighter days before returning to the despair she was conveying. As Hiei listened, he could not help but feel that Botan was playing the song _to_ him. Hearing her pain brought him back to the reality, and he remembered just the kind of woman Botan was through her melody. She was not some vile woman who would act spitefully towards someone she truly cared for. She was not a monster who would put others through what she had suffered. Botan was a kind, loving, emotional individual who had this hidden brightness that could light up his world.

In that moment, Hiei was desperate to reconcile with her. He didn't care what he had to do. If it was the kid thing, he wouldn't care. He'd at least try to be open to the idea for the future. If it was her family, he'd comfort her and tell her she didn't need them and that he'd replace them and protect her. If she needed him to say he loved her, he would, just to make this melancholy aura leave her. It didn't suit her. Worse, he could tell she was at the end of her rope just from how she played.

The song ended, yet the weight still existed in Hiei's chest as everyone applauded the amazing woman. She stood up slowly, like it was taking all of her energy just to stand, and took another bow before quickly rushing off the stage. Hiei was certain he was the only one who noticed her wiping away a few tears.

He needed to get to her.

* * *

After the recital, Hiei waited out in the foyer for Botan to come out. He was unmoved as the crowd passed him by, his back pressed up against the wall as he stared over his crossed arms. Out of nowhere, Hiei felt the desire to look up, and he happened to see bright blue hair moving along with the sea of people. His eyes widened before he quickly moved to catch up to her.

Gently, he grabbed her, and the action startled the woman and brought fear to her eyes. She turned to face him, and her face felt even more. "I-I-I…" she started weakly, holding her hands close to her chest as if she was trying to escape him. Her voice cracked as she tried to speak again. "I told you not to come."

As hurt as Hiei was by that, he side-stepped it and released her hand. "I couldn't stay away," he informed her honestly. "We need to talk. Can we do it now?" Botan was apprehensive, but she nodded and bowed her head low as if she had committed some horrible sin. Hiei felt like the image had stabbed him in the chest. It would forever remain there until he could set things right and make the woman's pain go away.

He brought her outside, and the two walked for a little while, Hiei leading Botan to a park. He figured it was the best place for them to talk, serene and quiet, and thankfully there was no one there on that day. The two sat down on one of the benches, looking so out of place since they were both so dressed up. After a long, heavy silence, Hiei finally broke it.

"What can I do…" he asked. "To make you feel better. Whatever it is, Botan, I'll do it."

Botan would not meet his eyes, but he knew his words had reached her when she dropped her head more. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "There is nothing you can do. It's better if we just part."

That was not what Hiei had wanted to hear, and he grew even more intense and bewildered. "Why?" he asked forcefully. Botan just shook her head vigorously. "I need an actual answer, Botan."

She cast his a disheartened glance before she told him, "It's better this way." Even she didn't sound too convinced, and Hiei was starting to feel empathy towards her. "Y…You and I…we just can't…I can't… And, maybe, you should also let Koto have my part."

Hiei felt like a bucket of ice water had been dumped on him. He actually felt fear when she said that, not of Koto or of giving anyone else a part, but because Botan was ending everything. "Why?" he whispered, his voice sounding uncertain and concerned. Why the heck was she running away from him like this? What had he even done?

Botan started crying, right then and there, and Hiei was at a loss of what to do as he watched her as if he was having an out of body experience, existing on the outside of this moment, and banging on the walls to get in. "I…I can't," she practically croaked. "I can't be your costar. I'm not like you. I can't hide my emotions, and it's already affected rehearsals already. I…I quit, Hiei."

After the words left her lips, the woman cried harder, and Hiei had to swallow down his anxiety. This was too much, too much for him and for her, and he realized that the reason she hadn't wanted him around wasn't because she just didn't want him there, but because she was so distraught and weak and vulnerable. She was trying to hide the fact that she was breaking, shattered, and now Hiei could see it. He felt awful for directing his anger towards her. Whatever was happening in her mind was serious. She wasn't just being some ridiculous, heartless witch. She didn't even have the strength to try to be.

Hiei reached out to touch her shoulder in that moment, to silently tell her that she wasn't alone. He may have been hurt, but he was still her friend. He still felt so strongly towards her, and seeing her like this, worse than she ever had been around her family, was killing him. He just wanted to make her stop crying, to be there for her when she pushed everyone away.

The moment his fingertips grazed her skin, she shot up off the bench and ran away, leaving the man stunned, staring at the spot where she had been sitting with his hand still outstretched. He didn't even need to look up to see that she was gone. Her reaction left him feeling stunned, empty, and more alone than he ever had before.

* * *

It had been a couple of weeks since Botan's recital, and everything had gotten so much worse. Botan wasn't taking anyone's calls. She wouldn't come out except for class. Everyone who knew her, even acquaintances, were trying to reach out to her, but she just ran the other way. Rehearsals had continued, and Hiei had reluctantly followed Botan's wishes, performing with Koto who had actually become reluctant to play the part. Everyone had come to see how Botan and Hiei were together, and Koto knew she could never do them justice. Even the song which Botan had written for the recital was not the same, and Koto had to pretend to play while Ayame handled it from below. As amazing as Ayame was, she couldn't mimic Botan's heart and soul, and during Hiei's solo, he felt devoid of all emotion.

The play was suffering, but that was the least of Hiei's worries. He was beginning to feel Botan's absence in his life. He was starting to regress, returning to being angry and bitter, but not at her. He was furious with himself for being a coward. He had not tried to reconnect with her since their encounter at the park, and it was not out of want. He didn't think he could watch her cry like that ever again. It unsettled him, and so he continued to avoid the issue, hoping and praying that giving her space would be enough to get her to come back to him.

With Botan, she was forcing herself to take care of herself. For meals, she would eat just enough for the baby to be okay. She couldn't bring herself to eat much, and sometimes what she could eat, she'd end up throwing up later anyway. She felt like she was just going through the emotions of her life, and she wanted to escape. She was planning to.

One day, Yusuke had shown up and forced Botan to let him inside. He wasn't mad at her. If anything, he was scared for her. For some reason, she did not look like the friend he knew of so well. "You don't look well," he pondered.

"You shouldn't be here," Botan said, hugging herself as she moved as far away from the teenager as possible.

Yusuke knew why she was saying that. "Hey, don't worry," he assured her. "I've been trying to call you to tell you. Things are fine with Keiko. She finally decided to listen to what I had to say. She's still processing it all, but she's not mad at you anymore." Botan didn't look convinced, and she refused to make eye contact with her friend to see that he was telling the truth. "As I said, things are fine with her…" He grew concerned. "But they aren't with you. You look like you're sick. What's up?"

Botan thought about what she'd say for a moment, and then realized that Yusuke deserved to know what had actually happened. He had probably been worrying himself sick over her, and that made her feel guilty. She could see dark circles under his eyes and wondered if she had caused that. She had to tell him, and she had to tell him everything.

"I'm pregnant."

Yusuke's eyes practically fell out of his head. If Botan hadn't been feeling so depressed and alone, she might have thought it comical. Nothing, though, was comical about this. "Is…is that why you and Hiei broke up?"

Botan nodded, not being careful of her next words. She would never know or understand how they sounded to Yusuke. "Hiei doesn't want children."

 _That son of a bitch,_ Yusuke mentally hissed. And he had always thought so highly of Hiei. He always seemed like a standup guy who cared about his friend. This news shocked him. How could anyone be so heartless as to tell a pregnant woman, a woman pregnant with _his child,_ that he didn't want children.

Botan began to cry, and Yusuke was instantly at her side, holding her and rubbing her back. It felt like, even though he was right next to her, he had never been further away from her. His grip tightened around her, and he promised her that everything would be okay. She hardly responded to that. All she said was that she didn't want anyone else to know, and she made him promise not to tell anyone. Hesitantly, Yusuke agreed if only to keep her trust. If he gave her his word, he was certain she'd come to him if she was really in trouble. Then, she asked him if he could leave. She was tired and just wanted to go to bed. He did, but he left her with the promise that he would see her the next day. She didn't say anything.

Once alone, Botan's hands rested against her abdomen. She rubbed over the small bump that was barely showing and sighed sadly, a few tears escaping her as she sang to her child a solemn lullaby. "Looking for something I've never seen, alone, and I'm in between," her voice conveyed in a whisper, almost explaining her position, confusion, and terror. She had never been in the position before, and there was no one she could turn to. She felt the need to explain to her child the harsh realities of life, the realities she would one day have to shield him or her from. "The place that I'm from and the place that I'm in, a city I've never been. I found a friend or should I say a foe said there's a few things you should know. We don't want you to see, we come and we go, here today, gone tomorrow.

"We're only taking turns holding this world," she sang sadly, looking up to the ceiling in a silent prayer as she mentally tried to justify what she was thinking and the sacrifice she was planning to make. "It's how it's always been. When you're older, you will understand."

She knew her child couldn't understand especially when he or she wasn't even born yet, but she really hoped that one day her child would. When Yusuke had said he would see her the next day, she said nothing because she couldn't tell him the truth regarding his statement. The following day, she didn't plan on going anywhere, and she was getting ready on making the biggest, life-changing decision she ever would.

"If I say who I know it just goes to show you need me less than I need you," Botan lamented, knowing she definitely needed her child more than her child would ever need someone like her. "Take it from me, we don't give sympathy. You can trust me, trust nobody…. But I said, you and me, we don't have honesty. The things we don't want to speak. I'll try to get out," she promised, "but I never will. Traffic is perfectly still.

"We're only taking turns," she repeated, "holding this world. It's have it's always been. When you're older, you will understand." It was her hope that her words were true, but she understood that maybe the child would not truly understand. "And again, maybe you don't. And again, maybe you won't…. When you're older, you might understand."

She looked outside into the night, tears in her eyes as her mind went over her plan. What she hadn't told Yusuke was that she had already made the decision to leave completely, to disappear into the night, away from everyone who once knew her. She needed to start a new life, with her and her child alone. No one in her old life needed a screw up like her, not her brother and sisters, not Yusuke and Keiko, and definitely not Hiei. It was what was best, she decided, for her and her child, even though it was tearing her apart inside. She was terrified to leave everyone behind, but she was solid in her decision. She would leave at the end of the month, the night of Hiei's show when no one could stop her, and she would never return.

Her hand rubbed her stomach once more. "When you're older, you might understand."


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters.

Okay everyone! This is it, opening night and the third to last chapter. To commemorate the fact that this story is complete (and with holidays coming up and lots of running around to do), I decided that today will be the story's final day, and so you will be getting three chapters at once! Thank you everyone for your support with this project. It has been a lot of fun. And also a special thanks to my friend LacieRhea for the wonderful commissioned cover art ^_^ Anyway, I hope you enjoy the show!

* * *

It was the end of the semester, the end of the month, and Botan had completely withdrawn from everyone. She was no longer interacting with Yukina at home, sometimes waiting until midnight to eat knowing the girl was finally asleep. Her brother could not get her to talk to him, and Yusuke hadn't heard, seen, or been able to find his friend. He tried catching her at her classes, but they admitted Botan hadn't been coming to class. It didn't affect her grade, but he was sure it was going to make things difficult for Botan during finals week.

After weeks of not hearing from her, Yusuke had become so worried that he couldn't handle it. He had done as Botan had asked, keeping her secret of they pregnancy away from everyone, but he couldn't do it anymore. It was that bastard's, Hiei's, fault, and Yusuke was not going to stay quiet any longer. The actor was going to learn just what Yusuke thought of him for playing Botan the way he had and then abandoning her and their child because he couldn't man up. It didn't even matter to the teenager that it was the opening night of Hiei's play. He wanted that jerk to suffer for everything he did to Botan.

So, that is how Yusuke ended up backstage, scolding Hiei in front of everyone. Hiei had been so out of it that he hadn't even realized that there was an intruder backstage. He had been so focused on the play, going through the emotions of setup, that he didn't even heard the guy until he had yanked him into view and gotten in his face.

Yusuke noticed that Hiei looked more desolate than he had at the dorm the past month. It had been pathetic. The idiot had caused his own downfall and spent all his time sulking instead of trying to fix it. He actually said that much, degrading Hiei in front of his cast. Hiei couldn't understand where this was all coming from and was starting to get angry with Yusuke. It wasn't his place to meddle in his affairs, and he had no right to do it in front of those who from which he demanded full respect.

"You need to leave," he growled in warning, but Yusuke didn't listen.

"And you need to stop being a little asshole," his ex's friend shot back. "Do you even care how much you hurt her? I mean, it's bad enough she loved you so damn much that she would have done anything for you, but then she turns up pregnant and you actually have the nerve to tell her you don't want kids when she's _already pregnant?_ What kind of heartless monster are you?"

Hiei felt his heart freeze in his chest, his blood turning to ice and keeping him rooted tensely in place as Yusuke continued to scream degrading words at him. His eyes had widened, the look of pure shock plastered over his features. When Yusuke was done with his tirade, he noticed the emotional gleam in Hiei's eyes and the actor's countenance. Yusuke's mouth dropped open when he realized that Hiei did not seem to act like a knowing, arrogant jerk. Instead, he looked like he had been kicked in a precious area and like he was about to fall and faint. That was not the reaction Yusuke had been expecting.

"She…she was…" Hiei swallowed, and his breathing became slightly uneven as he forced himself to reign in his now spiraling emotions. As if he hadn't had enough to worry about, now his cast was watching him have a breakdown. His red eyes men chocolate, and he managed to evenly tell Yusuke, despite his less than impassive gaze, "I didn't know."

It was not a lie. Yusuke could tell by the way Hiei had grabbed onto one of the props for support. It looked like the actor was sweating, and Yusuke knew for a fact that it had next to nothing to do with his play. It was as if Hiei was going over the last couple of months and every moment and conversation he must have had with Botan. Realization and acceptance seemed to flash in his eyes, and Yusuke could only assume what had happened. "Botan," he sighed, his angered gaze finally softening. "That girl…she always has to go and make selfless sacrifices."

"How could I not have seen it?" Hiei breathed out to no one, staring at the wall across from him. "I should have seen the signs."

"I didn't know either until a month ago," Yusuke explained, earning Hiei's aggravated gaze that questioned why he waited this long to tell him. "I assumed you knew." Hiei closed his eyes in desperation and shook his head. "I…I get that now."

There was no way he could have, but Hiei refused to deal with him any longer. Now, everything made sense to him. When Botan had asked him about children, his response had been less than ideal. Most likely, she feared his reaction after he told her kids would never be a part of his plan. It wasn't because he had any problem with kids, but he had never seen himself as suitable father material. He had no example to follow growing up, but it didn't mean that if he had a child that he wouldn't care about it. Botan had let her own emotions cloud her judgement, but she was allowed. She was the one who was carrying a baby and trying to do it all alone. Now he knew why she was sick all the time. That wasn't a good thing…

He needed to find her, needed to tell her that he knew about the baby and accepted their child. When she had asked, he never thought she could be pregnant. She had told him she was just curious, and so he had been honest. Had he known that a baby was already in existence, he would have never said those things. He would have promised her that he would love them both with everything he could. As she had said before their misunderstanding, Hiei was not his father and wouldn't abandon the woman he loved despite his reluctance to have children of his own. Glancing to his watch, he realized that it wasn't too late. There was still time to reach her before the play and bring her back with him. He couldn't, wouldn't, do this without her. He never had to again.

The actor looked to the woman's best friend with determined eyes. "Stall the play," he ordered. "I'm going to bring Botan back here."

A grin broke out on Yusuke's face, and he nodded. "I'd be happy to. Just go get her."

Hiei mimicked his motion and was about to take off when a commotion was occurring over by the door. Kuwabara was practically pushing himself in, Kurama trying to calm the other redhead and keep from provoking Hiei. It seemed the older man was determined to reach Hiei. He could tell by the heated glare directed towards himself, and now he understood it, his mouth pressed into a firm line.

"You can't stop me! I'm giving that shrimp a piece of my mind!"

Hiei understood, but his eyes narrowed. He did not like the name calling, but he shrugged it off if only because he didn't have time for this. He barely acknowledged his lover's brother, only pausing next to him for a moment before he left the backstage area. Kuwabara was about to call out after him, but Yusuke placed a hand on his shoulder. The redhead's brow furrowed as he looked at Yusuke's calm expression. "What's going on?"

"We have a job to do, buddy," Yusuke explained. "Hiei's going to get Botan."

Koto overheard Yusuke say this and immediately felt relief. Botan's part had been all the actress wanted this entire time, but after seeing how well she fit, she had lost her bitterness. At rehearsals, she just didn't feel right, and she knew it was because the role was not hers. She and Hiei did not have the same chemistry. Every physical moment between them, Hiei cut short, and Koto was thankful because she just couldn't get the perfect images of Botan and Hiei out of her mind. She couldn't do the character's relationship justice because she and Hiei were not close at all, and he was always in such an ill mood. That showed… _a lot._ "Hopefully he gets back soon," she said, earning Yusuke's, Kuwabara's, and Kurama's attention. "The most we can stall is a half hour."

"Got it," Yusuke stated before he told Kuwabara to follow him and inform the audience. They had an announcement to make.

Another actor walked over to Koto and Kurama, slightly pale. "What if Hiei isn't back in time," he asked nervously.

Koto placed her hands on her hips as she responded. "Well, you're the understudy for anyone who can't perform, right? If they don't make it back in time, _we'll_ have to deal with their roles. You better not screw it up. This is a big night for everyone, most especially Hiei."

"Right," the understudy replied, his nerves dying down as he mentally prepared. Kurama grinned at them both. Regardless of what was going to happen that night, Hiei's show would be in good hands.

"Set up for the first scene," Kurama ordered lightly. "We'll start the moment they get back unless we hear otherwise."

* * *

Yukina was surprised when she heard a knock on the door. She answered only to see her brother, who was supposed to be at his show, on the other side. Her expression softened, her concern evident. "What's wrong?"

"I need to see Botan," he told her, his voice adamant. "I just found out that she's pregnant."

Hiei expected his sister to be surprised, but she did not express the same level of shock he expressed. It was then he realized that his sister had tried to tell him. It was probably what she had to tell him all those weeks back in the music room when he went to find Botan. If he had just listened to her then, maybe he could have avoided the past couple of months. Perhaps he and Botan could have reconciled long ago. "I know," she confirmed. "She told me she didn't tell you." Then, his twin smiled at him. "But I'm glad you're here. Botan hasn't come out of her room for days except when I've been asleep or away. I'm worried about her."

To be honest, Hiei was too. Quickly, he went inside, Yukina stepping away from the door to allow him to run to her room, but they found that the door was locked. Hiei called out to Botan, but he received no answer, his hand pressed flat against the door. He decided to knock, to let Botan know he wasn't going away. "We need to talk," he told her. "Open this door, now. I know…" He still received no answer and heard no movement. Something was wrong. He looked to Yukina, his eyes pleading for help.

"I have her emergency key," she offered, quickly heading to her room to retrieve it.

Hiei nearly tore the key out of his sister's hand, desperate. When he unlocked the door, he had not been prepared to see that Botan's room had been completely cleared out save for her keyboard and the furniture. His heart was starting to race at the sight. Where was she?

There was a piece of paper on the desk, a letter that Botan had left for Yukina. Hiei cleared his throat to try to hide his anxiety. "'Yukina,'" he started, "'I am so unbelievably sorry, but I just couldn't do it. I can't stay anymore. I've been nothing but a burden to you and to everyone in my life…'"

At the train station, as Hiei was reading the letter, Botan had driven up and parked her car. She locked the door and went up to the clerk to pay the month long parking fee until she could come back to retrieve it, if she ever could.

"'l love your brother very much," Hiei read, not realizing that he had been crying, "'but I can't ruin his life with this. It's better if I leave. My family is better off without my existence, and I've already interfered with Yusuke's relationship enough. Please tell them all I'm sorry and that I love them. This is goodbye to you all. Botan.'"

As Hiei finished reading the parchment, he fell to his knees, so overcome by emotion. He couldn't believe the words he was seeing, how Botan could ever think she was this terrible person who would only bring everyone down. She did nothing but the opposite. She was the breath of positivity he needed. How could such a kind and beautiful woman harbor so much self-hatred, something he was accustomed to feeling in his younger years? She didn't deserve this misery. She needed to be brought back and surrounded by the people who did love her.

Yukina tears up, her heart breaking for her brother's loss. She moved to embrace him, but Hiei was already on his feet, his eyes determined. "I'm bringing her back," he stated with finality. His eyes shifted slightly to hers. "Call Kurama and inform him to use the understudies. I don't care about the play or the deal or any of it. There will be others." His sister smiled at him understanding the unspoken "but there could never be another her."

"Good luck, brother," she wished, watching Hiei as he sped out the door. A happy sigh escaped her. She had no doubt that everything would work out as it should.

As Hiei asked, she reached for her cell phone and called Kurama. She informed him of Hiei's desire while praying he'd reach Botan in time.


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters. I also don't own the song "Something to Believe In" from _Spectacular!_

Here's the second chapter of my three chapter updating finale! I hope you all enjoy!

* * *

Yusuke's message to the crowd had come as a surprise, especially when moments later a redheaded man came out and smoothly old the crowd that the play would commence as scheduled. Many in the audience were excited, all desiring been here to see a Hiei Jaganshi production. No one was more enthused than the businessman who the company with which Hiei had made his deal sent. The agency had selected this man for his good judge of talent and character. He had heard nothing but good things about the actor, and the show had created quite a bit of hype. He had been expecting to see the thespian when the lights went down and the curtains were drawn, but there was a completely different actor playing the main lead, Preston.

The scouter was visibly upset, but he reigned in that emotion. He knew that both the play and music had been written by Jaganshi, the music written with the aid of his female costar, Botan Kuwabara. He had never heard of the woman, but that made sense seeing as she was a student of the fine establishment. With that in mind, he decided to judge the performance solely on its written and musical merits. There had to be a reason why the understudies needed to fill in. This Jaganshi character did not seem like the type to let his work go on without him on a whim.

* * *

Hiei was racing to towards the train station. He had stumbled across some random stranger, but that random stranger had a sports car. Hiei had tossed money at the guy, demanding he bring him to the train station. He tossed in extra to pay the guy's ticket if he got caught speeding. Hiei didn't have time to ponder if Botan was even there. She never indicated in her letter where she was going, if she was going by train or taking her car and driving off never to be seen again. No, something told Hiei she was there. It was the only place she could have gone. He would trust these instincts while also praying desperately to get there in time without his driver getting pulled over.

It took minutes, but those minutes felt like hours to Hiei. The guy who drove him called out to him, asking Hiei if he wanted him to stick around. "No," Hiei had said. He didn't believe he'd require the man's service any longer.

He finally made it up to the station, the train's whistle blowing as steam exited the stalk. The actor's eyes searched around, not seeing Botan anywhere, so he ended up approaching the conductor who had called a final "all aboard." He must have looked a bit frantic for the other man looked at the teenager warily. "Can I help you?"

"Yes," Hiei stated, still trying to catch his breath. "Please, I need to know…has a woman named Botan boarded the train?"

The conductor's eyes narrowed. "I cannot answer that."

"Please," Hiei repeated forcefully. He was never one to beg, and this would probably be one of the only times in his life. "She has blue hair and purple eyes. I need to see her. You have to have seen her."

"Leave now, or I'm going to call security," the conductor threatened. "Don't tempt me to call the police as well."

A growl escaped the teen. "What help are you?" He sneered at the man, shoving past him and ignoring the protests. Hiei jumped on the train, startling the passengers in the one car and the ticket collectors. "Botan!" he called out. "Botan, where are you?"

He was grabbed from behind by a security guard, the conductor having been pursuing him as well. "What do you want us to do?"

The conductor nodded to the guard. "Remove this delinquent from my train." He turned back to the other passengers. "There is nothing to worry about, folks. We will be leaving shortly."

Hiei struggled against the security officer, glaring hatefully at them and the conductor. Many wary and pitying eyes were on him, and he wanted nothing more than to drop kick his assistant. It didn't matter, though. After he was removed from the train, the conductor kept true to his word and pulled away from the station. Hiei's struggling stopped, and he was released, pushed towards the ground. He had never felt so defeated ever in his life.

* * *

So far, the play had been amazing, the special effects impressive, the acting on par with professionals even from the understudies to filled in for two lead roles, and the music beautiful. The story was compelling, and many in the audience were fully falling for the two characters. The agent, though, felt his heart constricting with each scene. This story seemed familiar to him from the ended relationship in the beginning of the play to the discussions with the father, Preston meeting Hope the night of her birthday in a club, the whirlwind relationship and Hope's betrothal to another man, the woman's mother degrading her at every turn. Everything felt like it had been lived including the couple's first night, the misery and joys, the moment Preston learned he would have a child up until the moment Preston left for New York specifically. There were little asides that he did not seem familiar with, but the story so much reflected a story he knew well, a story that very closely resembled his life.

Another unfamiliar happening occurred when Preston was reading off a letter, the voice of the woman reading to the businessman catching him up. The agent's brow furrowed in confusion. He remembered no letter detailing the woman's situation. He never knew that she had been thrown out of her home, not until much later. He didn't know she got a job where they had met. He never received anything that could have given him a clue or an address. The last line of the letter made his stomach drop.

" _Twins, Preston. We're having twins! I couldn't believe it when I heard the two heartbeats. I wish I could have shared that with you. Hopefully soon I'll have a number to give you, but I hope mail will be enough for now. All my love…"_

A deeply disheartening song, "The Bell Tolls," interrupted the man's thoughts, his breath hitching with the rest of the audience as Preston made the decision to stay, tossing the letter into the trash at the end of his powerful declaration. His body started shaking, the story too uncanny to be a coincidence. Tears escaped the agent's eyes, but he hid it well as he breathed out one word, a name he hadn't spoken in years. "Hina…"

* * *

Despair. Hiei wasn't used to that emotion. The only other times in his life he had felt it were when his mother had passed and when he and his sister had been separated. Other than that, he never felt that desolation, and he could always rise above it. That was not something he could do now as he was thrown out of the station and forced to watch the last train of the day leave. Loving a woman like Botan so strongly had changed him, and his emotions could no longer be ignored. Even if years passed, he could never return to the stoic, heartless man he was prior to meeting her. He couldn't believe he had lost her.

Why hadn't he gone to her again? He knew she was suffering. His own cowardice and fear of rejection had held him back each time he thought about returning to her. The day she had left him in the park saying there was nothing he could do, he should have ignored her and tried everything. He should have gone far out of his comfort zone, out of his character, to show this woman that she was the one for him. But he hadn't, and now he had to accept the fact that he lost, accept the painful defeat.

He had to force himself up off the ground and dusted himself off, feeling so isolated and alone, listening to the final whistle blow. The shrill toll echoed in the distance, so far away. Hiei shook his head, the tone dissipating from his ears. Botan's name escaped his lips in a whisper.

The broken man stood in silence, the wind blowing loudly around him. It felt like the weather was reflecting the storm in his heart. This was what he deserved for the spineless way he had just given the love of his life up, watching her walk away too many times. She deserved better than him, and yet she believed _she_ was the one who ruined everything she touched. It wasn't fair when the opposite was true, and he would never be able to tell her.

Out of nowhere, a sound replaced the dying wind, and Hiei's head shot up in surprise. He could have sworn he was alone at the station, not a soul around, and yet it sounded like someone was crying. Actually, it was more than crying. It was downright sobbing, and it was familiar. He knew because Hiei had spent many nights holding Botan while she cried after dealing with her horrid sisters. His heart started beating in his chest rapidly as he took off towards the source of the sound.

There were cars parked everywhere, Hiei had to dodge through them all, but the deeper he went into the parking lot, the louder the heart-wrenching sobbing grew. As it did, Hiei found himself sprinting faster and faster until he reached the last row of cars. He froze across from her, his heart still thumping but filling to the brim with relief. Once again, he felt like his soul was not in his body and watching from above as his body robotically crossed the distance.

There she was, Botan, leaning on the hood of her car with her eyes hidden by her hands as she cried out all of her pain and agony.

Hiei was in shock, seeing her, looking as broken and weary as he had felt, and all he could think was how beautiful she looked and how stunned and thankful he was that this was clearly not a figment of his imagination. _Didn't she get on the train?_ his mind challenged. It continued to ask him a slew of questions contradicting what he was seeing. _What if this is a dream?_ Even if it was, it didn't matter. It would be a dream from which he would never want to wake. _She's…so beautiful._

Slowly, he walked up to her, Botan gasping when he gently called her name. Crimson and amethyst met, tears still cascading down her cheeks. "Hiei," she breathed out weakly. "What are you doing here?"

Hiei continued to close the distance between them. "I came to find you," he softly said. "You can't leave."

Botan was about to object Hiei's words. He could see it in her eyes until they filled with panic as she made a realization. "Your show!"

"It's not important," he hurriedly replied silencing her, hand in his pocket. His eyes were nervous as he admitted, "You and our child are."

His words stunned Botan, and she immediately interrogated him. "How do you know about that?"

"It doesn't matter how I found out," he told her. "All that matters is that it's true. What isn't true, though…Botan, you could never ruin my life. Neither could our child. When I told you what I did, I had no idea it was a possibility for me. I…I never thought I would ever have a child. I didn't know one existed, and if I did I would have worded my answer differently." Botan looked uneasy and unconvinced. "Had I known, this would have been my answer. I want you, Botan, both of you, and even though I don't think I'm anything close to father material, it doesn't mean I'd punish my child for it. It doesn't mean I'd punish you for it. Woman…I…I need you. And right now, I just want you to go back with me, so we can be together, so we can finish out the show right, the way it _should have_ happened."

"W-What do you mean?" Botan asked, shocked.

"I had this hope," Hiei explained to her, settling directly in front of her and taking her hands in his. Botan watched his eyes warily, preparing to be hurt, but Hiei had to ignore that. He couldn't let another moment pass him by. His grip tightened on her to prevent her from running away as she had in the past. "Even if you decided not to be a part of the show, I still…wanted you to come." He let that line lie between them, and Botan blushed and looked down in shame. She realized, in that moment, how much she must have hurt Hiei when she told him not to be there for her and her performance. "I hoped you would still be there to see it to the end, and then you would have seen new last scene at the end."

Botan's browned furrowed in confusion. "What, but I thought…"

"I don't want to live my parents' story," he confessed, moving so much closer to the woman. "I want to make our own story. The scene I added, it's what should have happened, what my father should have done, what I am doing now. Come back with me, Botan. I want you to perform that last scene with me."

What he had said left Botan completely awed. She couldn't accept or deny. Her mind could hardly process it. Hiei took advantage of her surprise and gentle grabbed her, his hand cradling her neck as he guided her lips to his. He kissed her so passionately, ignoring the fact that Botan had yet to respond. There was no way he would stop, no way he would let her go again. After what felt like forever, Botan finally responded, timidly at first, but then it felt decisive and final. Hiei's lips shook as he breathed out his relief, his hand entangling in her hair as Botan's hands tenderly caressed his cheeks. A chuckle escaped him as he continued to consume the woman. Quiet moans brought him back to the reality that they were still in the middle of the parking lot.

Hiei pulled away, reminding himself that this was the second time he'd lost himself with his girlfriend in a public place like this, red dusting both their cheeks. He pressed his lips to her ear, breathing warmth against them making her shiver. "We can still make it."

Botan nodded, a tear escaping her as she smiled and giggled lightly. She really couldn't believe Hiei had come for her. When she reached the station, gone to pay the fee, the clerk had asked her when she'd return, and that had been all it took to break her down. The man had come out of his booth to try to comfort her, but Botan could not handle anyone being near her in that moment. She went back to her car, unable to leave, and it wasn't because she didn't think it best. She was absolutely terrified to take the selfless step that would free everyone from the burden. For the last twenty minutes, she had been crying over her cowardice and selfishness. Now, all of that seemed silly. Now, Hiei had told her that he needed her. If she was being honest with herself, she needed him too.

Hiei held his hand out for her keys, something he had done once before when she needed to get away. Botan happily handed them over and took her position as the passenger. He started up the vehicle and was about to pull out when Botan's hand touched his wrist. He looked to her curiously. "How did you even get here?"

"I paid someone to drive me here," he responded, shifting in to gear.

Botan was even more surprised. "How did you know I'd be at the train station?"

Hiei started driving, silently pondering her question. His eyes widened as he made a mental discovery, and then his expression softened. He answered, never taking his eyes off the road. "Whenever I wanted to run, that's where I'd always go." Her expression reflected his at the answer. At that moment, he managed to pull up a piece of paper from his jacket smoothly and handed it to her. "Here. It's the new scene and final song. I'll help you learn it for the final scene."

Once again, Botan smiled brightly at him. "Okay, I'm ready."

* * *

Koto was very reluctant to go out after they had taken an intermission. It seemed that despite Hiei's orders to go through the whole play, once they came upon the last scene, Kurama announced that they would take a short break to prepare the set. So much had happened during the show, and thought it was performed perfectly, backstage was in disarray. Yusuke and Botan's brother did their best to help Kurama manage, but it was clear they had never seen the back of a set. They were fairly clueless, but still a bit helpful nonetheless.

Everything felt wrong to Koto, and she was not thrilled that she had to sing Botan's solo. They couldn't keep the audience waiting any longer. The actress shook her head, delaying going out to set as the audience was still traversing back to their seats. A sigh escaped her. She was being a little…word she wasn't going to call herself at the moment, especially because she knew she _could_ do it and just didn't _want_ to do it. She had practiced it before at the dress rehearsals, but now she was just agitated. Nothing was flowing as smoothly without Hiei there, and she grew a whole new respect for the actor as more than just a big name she could put on her resume.

Kurama had come to her, a patient smile on his features as he told her the words she had been praying to hear. "Hiei called in. He and Botan will be doing the final scene. You just need to get through the solo."

Relief washed over the brunette, mainly because she had barely had any time to learn the new finale. "Thank you for letting me know, but you could have waited until after the scene to tell me."

"I noticed you were having a small moment and thought it best to inform you. Either way, you would have been fine," the redhead reassured.

"Thank you for the vote of confidence," Koto remarked. "I have to say, I am sorry for all of the times I was bitchy towards you and everyone else."

The man just offered an understanding grin and said, "Being a part of a Jaganshi production is not always an easy feat. You've now learned that; however, you've done right by the show and that is what's important. Take this experience with you for the future." Koto smiled and nodded, and now she was happily ready to take on her final scene in the production.

* * *

The audience was back in their seats, the men and women all applauding save the agent who had bee hired to critique the play. His heart was still palpitating rapidly. He was clutching the spot above his heart, emotional pain coursing through him even as the woman who had played Hope sang her solo. He couldn't focus on the words, but he already knew how this show would end.

He had been grateful for the intermission, his head spinning and the need to leave the theater growing. During that time, he had gone outside, away from all others, to make a call he had never expected to make. It hadn't been a mistake, coincidence, or otherwise. The man had received such horrible news that it made the reality of the play hit him hard in the gut. Applause was heard throughout the theater upon the song's completion, but the agent could not move or give proper accolade. He had no idea what to do now.

The redhead who had announced intermission came out when the solo was completed to give the news that the real stars of the show had returned for the finale, to which there was even more thunderous applause. The man's heart stopped in his chest, and he encroached upon the edge of his seat. He needed to see him, to see the boy. He needed to know if he was who thought he was.

Botan took a deep breath, standing in place of Koto at the start. She was standing in the center of the stage, where she would have been at the end of her horrible and lonely solo. Now, though, Botan had a renewed faith, and she had to fight the smile that threatened to form on her lips from her joy. Instead, she forced herself to look somber, and forced down the warm and fuzzy feeling threatening to bubble out.

Hiei came out onto the stage from the right, looking to the woman of his affections. He could hear the surprised gasps of the audience and smirked. It seemed his presence at the end had caused the same desired effect of what Botan's scene would have. He felt slightly taken aback by the emotion and pride he felt in that moment. He was desperate to end this, now, mainly because he wanted to return to Botan's apartment and start doing his job as her partner. He just wanted to make up for the past couple of months. It would come with time. First, they needed to finish the show, and then they could start the rest of their lives.

At the sound of footsteps, "Hope" looked up and gasped, facing "Preston," and her expression conveyed her surprise. Hiei couldn't help but think of how Botan had looked at him with that very same expression when he had shown up at the train station. _"P…Preston? I-Is that really you? Is this a dream?"_

" _No, Hope,"_ Hiei replied, closing the distance between them and taking her hand. _"This isn't a dream."_

The agent in the audience had to grip the chair in front of him, watching in shock. His breathing had become labored, and someone next to him actually asked if he needed her to get someone. He shook his head, his eyes clenched shut. He couldn't believe the sight of the actor. "He looks just like her…those eyes…" he whispered. "Hina…I didn't know."

" _What are you doing here?"_ Hope asked. _"Y-You never answered my letters. I thought…"_

" _I promised I'd return,"_ Preston countered. _"I meant it."_ A warm smile appeared on his face, his gaze moving to her abdomen. _"So, twins, huh?"_

Botan laughed, and she actually reared up, running into Hiei's arms as she called out _"oh Preston."_ The audience cheered as the couple spun around and shared a kiss, both overjoyed. Then, Preston backed away, his eyes full of guilt. Hope gazed upon him, concerned. _"Preston?"_

" _I don't want to lie to you,"_ he said. _"Hope, I wasn't going to come back…. I…didn't think I could do it."_

" _What changed your mind…?"_

Music started, the two main cast members never breaking eye contact as the piano and percussion playing an eloquent and soft melody. Hiei began singing first, his expression dark and his eyes on the floor of the stage. _"I used to see the world as cold, so cold…"_ he confessed.

Botan smiled sadly, forcing him to look at her. _"I always felt so all alone, oh,"_ she admitted.

Hiei remained stoic as a violin joined, and asked, _"How did you know you'd find me here? Yeah…"_

" _How did you ever see behind my tears? Yeah…"_

" _I never realized,"_ the sang together, holding onto one another, _"how anyone could make everything so right. I was so sad…you brought me back…"_

" _Oh!"_ Hiei sang out before the rest of the cast, including Koto and Hiei's understudy, came out onto the stage to sing in the background along with the couple.

" _You give me something to believe in, after all that we've been through. The love you give, it all comes back to you. You give me something to believe in, you can see the real me, and here, with you, is where I'm meant to be."_

The piano took over again with an electric guitar, playing the same transitional melody, and Hiei guided Botan into a dance. His expression was less tense and more jovial, and Botan acted surprised as the two flowed together perfectly. _"I don't have to imagine anymore, no, oh!"_ he sang.

" _All this time it was you I was waiting for, oh!"_ Botan responded in kind.

" _And here we are together side by side,"_ the cast sang with them. _"And nothing seems impossible tonight."_

Hiei and Botan sang together, the cast only coming in every few words for emphasis. _"You look inside my heart and seem to get me from the start, and we've got the chance to make this last."_

The song picked up speed as everyone sang the chorus once again. _"You give me something to believe in, after all that we've been through. The love you give, it all comes back to you. You give me something to believe in, you can see the real me, and here, with you, is where I'm meant to be."_

Music shifted, and the feel of the song changed to a more lively and powerful tune. Botan sang alone at first, the cast joining her along with Hiei in the second line. _"Lift us up so high above, higher than high, now we realize, feeling so alive!"_

Hiei and Botan pulled back, the background dancers moving forward, giving a final message to the audience, a message Hiei wanted Botan to hear. _"All it takes is love to find us, guide us all the way, that's the one thing you can trust. All we need is love to reach out, show out, we belong here together."_

While the background dancers did some fun and crazy dance moves, Botan chuckled along with Hiei, her boyfriend's nose nuzzling her neck as he showered her with random kisses in the dark of the stage. She looked up at him, love shining in her eyes. She still couldn't believe how much he had changed his solemn story, bringing so much life into it, just for her, not so much desiring to change his parents' story, but requesting that theirs continue. "I love you," she whispered to him, and she noticed the way his fiery eyes shone.

"I love you, too, woman," he admitted, hugging her tightly.

Koto was the one to pull them back into the scene, hissing a whisper that they were on. Once again, they sang the joyous refrain for the final time, the music growing more intense, and, as Hiei and Botan made their way to center stage, the cast sang a downward slurring of the scale of notes on an "oh" and Hiei dipped Botan, pressing their foreheads together as the song came to its end.

The roaring applause whistles, and catcalls were telling to how the audience had received the ending. It had been a hit, a standing ovation and positive words being tossed out. Botan's smile widened, her eyes still on Hiei's. She could tell her was happy by the turn of events, but it wasn't the play he was content with. The desire in his eyes told her that he was thrilled she was there in his arms. The second the light died down, the stage shrouded in darkness, he awarded her with a kiss. He gingerly moved to wipe her tears away and then pulled away just in time for the lights to come on. The cast all joined hands and then took their bow. Again, the lights went off, and they exited stage left, Hiei never letting go of Botan's hand.

* * *

With the show over, the commotion backstage was no longer of panic but of joy and relief. Kurama had caught Hiei up to the events that led to the play and how well the performance had gone despite him not being there and the anxiety backstage. Hiei had to admit that his cast had done a good job carrying the show, and so he uncharacteristically offered his congratulations to everyone, stage crew, musicians, and actors. He looked up towards Botan, the woman smiling fondly and expressing her own thanks to Ayame for taking the reigns. Hiei relaxed, thankful to see her in her rightful place by his side. She deserved to be full of smiles and laughter.

Kuwabara ended up barreling backstage, Yusuke in tow, and the overwhelmed brother nearly tackled his bewildered sister into a hug. Botan tried to ask her brother what was wrong, but when she went to push him away, she felt tears streaking down his face. His grey eyes bore into hers, and she grew nervous. He grew slightly incensed as he loudly yelled, "'What's wrong?' What do you mean 'what's wrong?" Botan frowned sheepishly looking down, and Kuwabara allowed the broke eye contact. "Yukina told me about your letter is what's wrong! Botan, how could you think about leaving? You're my baby sister, and I love you…"

Botan looked up again, noticing the pure concern and fear plastered over her brother's face. She even noticed Yusuke behind him, wiping a tear, and she was even more surprised when she saw Keiko standing there. Her heart started to race, anxiety returning to her. It lasted up until the moment that Keiko walked up to her and actually dared to hug her. Botan nearly stopped breathing and remained frozen in her ex-best friend's grip. "Hey," Keiko greeted warmly yet timidly. "I…think we need to catch up on stuff."

"What are you doing here?" Botan asked warily. She felt Hiei's hands on her shoulders and backed away closer to him.

"I came for another visit," she explained. "Actually, I was hoping to see your show, though Yusuke hadn't told me until I already made the plans that you had backed out. I'm glad I got to see you perform, though. You were really great."

"But…why are you talking to me?" Botan questioned, her brows furrowing. "Like…like you don't hate me. Last time…"

Keiko interrupted her hurriedly, a sad smile on her face. "Yusuke finally got my stubborn self to listen to him about what happened, and Botan…I'm sorry. I apologize for all those horrible things I said to you. I now know that you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. It could have been anyone else, but it was you, and you tried to keep me in mind. I'm sorry for all of the torture you've put yourself through because I had to listen to your stupid sister. I should have trusted my best friend more. Can you ever forgive me?"

She couldn't believe it. After so many years of Keiko hating her, Botan had been certain that the woman would never forgive her. This plea the brunette made…Botan wanted to think it was a trap. She could better prepare to be hurt again that way. The emotions pouring off of Keiko, though, were genuine, and Botan couldn't stop the tears from falling. She laughed lightly when Keiko looked at her so worried, accidentally spilling out, "Pregnancy hormones."

"WHAT?" Kuwabara shouted alarmed. Hiei looked away, red dusting his cheeks as he avoided the older brother's gaze not wanting to have _that_ discussion now. Kuwabara was about to say something, but a gentle hand on his arm pulled his attention away from the actor.

Yukina had shown up, seemingly out of nowhere, with a kind and cheerful smile. Everyone ignored Yusuke's call of "when did she get here?"

The teal-haired woman patiently said, "It isn't fair to give them grief considering the two of us are together."

Yusuke's mouth dropped open, and Hiei's eyes went wide as his head shot over to regard his elated sister and his bashful roommate. "When the hell did that happen?" both Hiei and Yusuke exclaimed at the same time causing raucous laughter to surround them all.

The euphoria came to an abrupt end when Kurama walked up to the group, a serious air about him. "My apologies," he practically whispered, emerald eyes meeting Hiei's emotionless gaze. "The talent scout sent here tonight would like to speak with Hiei privately."

Despite what Kurama had attempted to arrange, the agent practically pushed past him, eyes landing on Hiei and Yukina, repeatedly glancing between the two. Everyone noticed, at first glance, his black hair, only slightly spiked, but it closely resembled someone they knew. Both Hiei's and Yukina's eyes grew as wide as saucers in recognition. They had seen pictures of the man, and his resemblance to Hiei was uncanny. Hiei sneered as his sister murmured out, "Oh my…"

The man's eyes found hers the moment she spoke, his eyes appearing pained, like he was seeing a ghost. "You look just like your mother."

A growl escaped Hiei, his glare intensifying as he stormed away from the man. Botan looked to the agent and then followed Hiei out of concern for her boyfriend. That reaction had not been exactly what the businessman had hoped for, his shoulder slumped in defeat. Yusuke asked the question everyone was dying to know. "Who are you?"

"My name is Pyrius," the man stated, "their father."


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters.

And here it is! The finale! And I bet no one was expecting the plot twist in the previous chapter. But you don't have to wait. You get to see how it all turns out today!

* * *

It wasn't supposed to happen. It just wasn't supposed to happen. Hiei could have never anticipated this in a million years of existence let alone eighteen. He had never thought he would ever come face to face with the man who left his mother destitute and alone. Now, many years after her death, only a few years of him and Yukina being reunited, he shows up, and even better he was the man that was negotiating his deal with an acting company. The deal he had made regarding the show about his parents was going through one of his parents. No, Pyrius was not his parent. He was nothing to Hiei. Hiei wanted nothing from him, ever.

"Hiei!"

The actor flinched at the sound of Botan's voice, mainly out of surprise. He had assumed everyone would leave him be. He was thankful that Botan was not like the others. Someone needed to keep him grounded before he did something he'd regret. She approached him quickly, engulfing his taut form in a comforting hug. Hiei took a deep breath, inhaling the essence that was her. Yes, that was what he needed. He already felt calmer, but he still would not go back.

Botan had put two and two together. It wasn't hard given that Hiei truly resembled then man who had come to see them backstage. Out of all the people the agency could have sent, both Hiei and Botan were surprised that it had to be his father. Neither could have guessed that the man, who they had believed to be in New York, would be part of the agency.

"I don't want to go back there," Hiei stated petulantly. Botan couldn't blame him. There were many times she didn't want to be anywhere around her horrid sisters. Hiei had kindly aided in her escape that one time. "You can't make me."

"Who said I would want to do that?" Botan questioned honestly. Hiei met her gaze, his eyes uncertain. "We don't have to go back," she assured him, taking his hand in hers and tightening her grip.

Her words soothed Hiei, her calm eyes and bright smile tugging at his heart. He finally took her in his arms again and repeated the words he had said to her on the stage. He meant them, and she knew. When her eyes shimmered with love again, he wondered why he had been so foolish to keep them hidden so long. Botan hadn't been sure she had heard him right the first time. Hiei wasn't one to speak his feelings so openly like that save incredibly serious moments. This time, she took the hand she was holding and placed it on her stomach. Hiei tensed for a fraction of a second before he allowed his fingers to mold against her. "We love you, too," she murmured.

His breath hitched, and he rested his forehead against hers. He was so overcome with emotion, his heart aching pleasantly with such adoration for the blue-haired woman and the child they'd have. His eyes opened slightly, and he was caught in though about what he wanted to do. It dawned on him that he had left his twin at the mercy of their father. He had to go back, he decided, if only to protect his sister and tell the man he doesn't need him. For the moment, though, he wanted to focus on his future. It would calm his raging heart, talking to Botan, and that was what he wanted.

"Would you consider being my costar in future productions?"

The question took Botan by surprise. She had actually never thought past Hiei's current play, and even then she had been planning to leave town and never see anyone again. Still, she couldn't deny that they were a great team. "Of course I will be, always," she promised before adding a little bit of humor to disperse the emotional tension between them. She wrapped her arms around his neck possessively, and Hiei actually felt amused by her antics. "I don't really want to share you with other girls, anyway."

Hiei snickered. "I agree with that statement, Botan. I don't want it to be anyone else, not ever." She beamed at him like a bright star. No…no one could ever compare to her.

* * *

Pacing back and forth was all Pyrius could think to do. No one had said anything or moved since Hiei had left and his costar had followed. He overheard a tall redhead reassuring his daughter that his sister would bring Hiei back safely and not to worry. Yukina didn't answer, only sat in silence, serious and slightly angry in her expression, contemplating the turn of events. God, she looked like her mother when she did that.

The rest of the backstage area had been cleared out by Kurama, Yusuke, and Keiko, the former telling the students that they would be sure to have great recommendations provided their discretion over the turn of events. Everyone became tight-lipped. They respected Hiei Jaganshi far too much to blow up his life. He had already suffered enough during the past couple of months.

Silence was deafening, and soon Pyrius just wanted to say something. He approached Yukina and was about to tell her why he never responded to their mother's letters. Surprisingly, that was the moment when Hiei had returned with Botan, pure hatred radiating off of him as the door slammed open. He walked up to the man with purpose, his stride distinct. He stopped in front of the nervous man, his gaze unyielding. "You are not welcome here," he spoke evenly, though his tone conveyed his true feelings. Pyrius was taken aback, but he understood. "Leave."

"Not yet," Pyrius lightly demanded. "There is something I need to tell you and your sister."

"I don't wish to hear it," Hiei spat venomously. "I do not want anything from _you._ You can tell the heads of the agency that I thank them for the opportunity, but I'd rather not owe you anything. Botan and I intend to make a path for ourselves without your influence."

"Hiei…" he breathed out, his son's eyes narrowing in warning. "M-Mr. Jaganshi, rather…please, just listen for a moment… What I have to tell you…it's important."

Hiei was about to deny the man again when Yukina called out forcefully, "It's all right, Hiei." He looked over to his twin, his eyes silently fighting hers. She would not bend. "We need to hear this."

A frustrated sigh escaped Hiei as he quietly sat down in surrender, taking a seat on part of the set. "Get on with it," he ordered, crossing his arms as if he were royalty. In a way he was. This was his element, after all. He was thankful when Botan came to him and sat at his side. Kuwabara did the same for Yukina. Both would act as pillars of support if needed.

Pyrius took a deep and needed breath before he began his tale. "I…I tried to get in touch with your mother," he informed them. Hiei scoffed in disbelief, but that did not deter the man. "By the time I tried, Hina's mother had thrown her out on her own and didn't know how to contact her." That actually caught both Hiei's and Yukina's attention. They could believe that. "I had used all of my resources to try to find her, but they came up short."

That Hiei didn't buy. "That's a load of bull. As you saw in the show, our mother sent letters multiple times. Clearly, you're lying."

"I never received the letters," Pyrius tried, his eyes full of sadness. "All of my mail went through my father the first few months of my stay in New York. I had never seen them, never knew. During the intermission, I…the story felt too real, and I knew there was a possibility. I contacted my father. He's been very sick lately, and we only just got back in touch. Actually, he's in the hospital as we speak. He confessed to destroying the letters and paying off the P.I. I hired into lying and saying he couldn't locate her. I prayed every day that I'd hear from her. I even kept track of when you might be born and tried calling hospitals around that time asking around, but they all fed me the same line of not being able to tell me if she was there. I didn't know what to do."

"This is too easy," Hiei stated. "Why should we believe you?"

"Because I'm here now, telling you both this," Pyrius replied sincerely. "If I was like the man in the play, I wouldn't have bothered. I would have made the call either to recommend or deny you. Neither of you have to believe me. I can hardly believe it myself. But please, _please_ tell your mother that I had no idea. She never has to see me again. I just need her to know that I've never stopped loving her."

Both Hiei and Yukina exchanged confused and knowing glances, and Botan covered her mouth as she choked on a sob. She had to turn away, trying to hide her tears. Hiei could tell she had felt something towards what the man was saying. She wouldn't act this way otherwise, and even Hiei could feel Pyrius's candor. His brow furrowed in grief. "That…" he hoarsely spoke, clearing his throat. "That won't be possible."

Pyrius looked disheartened. "I know you think I did you wrong, but please…" he begged. "She needs to-"

"Our mother died when we were children," Yukina hurriedly explained to the man. "Her friend, Rui, took me in, but her mother would not let her take Hiei. Hiei was on his own for the longest time."

"What?" Pyrius gasped in a whisper, his throat catching in distress. He looked to his stoic son in amazement, but Hiei would not meet his gaze still processing what he was feeling, what he believed. "What…?" He started, clearing his throat before he made another attempt to ask, "What happened to her?"

"She was sick," Hiei stated, his voice full of emotion. Pyrius noted that the teenager clutched Botan's hand. "I became an actor to get myself off the streets."

"Seriously?" Kuwabara inquired. The redhead watched as his sister lied her head on Hiei's shoulder and curled up beside him.

Pyrius was clearly overwhelmed by the news. He had to step back, gripping one of the wooden posts. There was no way that he had heard right. Hina couldn't be gone. He couldn't have lost the woman he loved. His son couldn't have grown up alone. His children couldn't have been separated upon losing the one most important to them. Unfortunately, it was all reality. "I…" He was speechless.

After a moment, he turned to face Hiei again. "I know you don't want anything from me, and I understand, but…I was genuinely and truly impressed with that I heard and saw. I will be recommending you to the agency, and the deal will still go through. I'll have them remove me from your case, all traces, I promise. You will never have to see me again."

The downtrodden man was about to walk away, Hiei walking him through the corner of his eye. He could see how crestfallen the man, his father seemed. Though it wasn't quite visible, Hiei could see Pyrius's shoulders shaking. He was…crying? Hiei's expression softened. As hateful as he had been, he truly believed the man's explanation. "Wait," he called out. Pyrius looked back, not bothering to hide the tears. Hiei grimaced, pitying the man. This broken man was not the man he envisioned. The teenager couldn't even imagine…. This could have been his life almost an hour ago. "Maybe it wouldn't be so bad…if we worked together, I mean."

For the first time of the night, a true, genuine smile broke out on the man's face. Yukina couldn't contain herself any longer, tears of sadness and joy mixing as they escaped her. She ran to embrace her father, the man wrapping his arms around her tightly as if he'd never let her go. "My precious daughter," he whispered. He then glanced up to Hiei who was still avoiding his gaze. "And my strong son. Thank God I found you."

* * *

Months had passed since the day of Hiei's play, and it was the end of summer. It had passed by in such a whirlwind blur. Once finals were over, which Botan had had to study immensely for considering she hadn't, planning to run before they ever took place, she and Hiei had returned to her hometown. Hiei had been so great, helping her catch up. He stayed with her every night, and Yukina had actually taken to staying at his old dorm, switching with him. Yusuke had taken Hiei's bunk to leave the girl and Kuwabara alone. Hiei had taken over for Yukina, making sure Botan ate and sat with her when she got sick, something that was happening far less since the stress of the unknown was gone.

When they returned to Sparrowfield, Botan had packed up all of her things, the things she wanted to be more precise, with her boyfriend's help. Ruka and Juri had spent the time giving her grief, but Botan ignored them. She was annoyed when they followed her out to the car each trip and finally snapped at them with Shizuru as a witness. "I finally found a man who loves me," she had said to them. "We're about to start a family, so it would be easier if we lived together."

Needless to say, neither of her bratty sisters could believe her. Botan didn't care. Actually, she was done caring. Instead, she walked up to Shizuru and met her gaze, Hiei watching from behind her, his arms crossed. He would step in if he needed to, but Botan was about to request something they had discussed. "I wanted to apologize," she said, causing Hiei to roll his eyes. They hadn't agreed on the apology part of her speech. "I'm sorry that, me and the other kids, our existence had caused you to lose the man you loved, but I am done feeling guilty over it."

"Botan…" Shizuru breathed out before shaking her head. "I appreciate that, but it's unnecessary and-"

"I understand that it's difficult to deal with all of us," Botan continued. "You never got to live your life because of what happened. I can't make up for that, but I…I want to take Hinageshi with me and Hiei. Like I said, we're going to have a baby. We're starting to prepare for having a family. That's the kind of environment Hinageshi should live in. Not…that." She gestured to the family home that held nothing but misery, resentment, and anguish.

Shizuru didn't know what to say, but she agreed with Botan that their home was not the best place for their youngest sister. If she could spare anyone else this pain, she would. "I agree," she replied. She knew it would make things easier on herself, and Botan was more than capable of caring for the young girl. She was certain Kazuma would be with them as well. Her blue-haired sister started to head back inside to collect the child. "And Botan, thank you. I wish you luck." Botan didn't even give her a second glance.

* * *

The move went smoothly, Hiei and Botan renting an apartment off-campus. The place was in a very homey neighborhood with a playground, a pool, and a clubhouse. Hiei would be making plenty of money along with Botan through the agency. They had happily hired him, and they gave into his one demand that Botan be his leading lady in everything. Hiei was certain his father had had some pull in that. Besides, when they auditioned for their first production, their chemistry had blown the directors away. They could even send Hinageshi to a private school if she wanted to go. She was still pretty adamant about public school, though.

Kuwabara ended up moving into the same complex with Yukina, Kuwabara receiving extra money from his grants for his living expenses and Yukina getting a job as a freelance writer. They would spend quite a bit of time with Hiei, Botan, and Hinageshi, the young girl loving the true familial and loving atmosphere. Even Kurama and Yusuke, who had decided to stay roommates in the campus apartment Yukina and Botan left, would come to visit. Keiko would actually come up to the campus more often, her and Botan renewing their friendship and talking late at night. Yukina would hang around with the girls when they needed a girls' day out. The three girls had become very close and supportive of one another. There was even talk of Keiko transferring within a year or so.

As for the baby, she was anticipated to arrive during the winter, and both Botan and Hiei were thrilled. Botan had expressed to Hiei, despite how confusing it might get, that she wanted to name their little girl Hina, after his mother. She planned on dropping Hinageshi's nickname when that happened. Surprisingly, Hiei, the one who liked to avoid all of his emotions, was fine with that idea. He was finally starting to shed the layers of his past.

Another exploit for the twins was the fact that they were getting to know their father a bit more. Hiei had found that he had believed all the man had confessed. In fact, he and Yukina had accidentally met their grandfather one day. He was a vile man who just showed up and let himself into their father's penthouse, and he had immediately recognized Yukina and Hiei just because they looked so much like their parents. The man had said some disgraceful and degrading things towards the teenagers, but Pyrius had stepped up to defend his children without so much as a hint of timidity.

"You need to call before you visit in the future, old man," Pyrius ordered, "because you are not welcome around my kids. I only got in touch with your sorry ass because you were sick, out of obligation, but you are _not_ my father, not really."

Hiei wouldn't say it out loud, but he actually admired Pyrius for standing up to his father. He was not the spineless coward he had believed him to be. Actually, the proud father was trying his best to make up for almost two decades of lost time, too much in Hiei's opinion. Pyrius was constantly buying stuff for Yukina, him, Botan, and the baby, even when they assured him they were fine. Still, the man was undeterred, and he had admitted something that made everyone back off on the denial. "I missed out on all of this with Hina." No one wanted to derail him. Helping them made him happy. Considering he was still struggling with the notion that his lover was gone, they could deal with the awkward discomfort.

So now, as the sun was setting on the last summer day before everyone needed to return to school, a picnic on the beach was a welcome excursion. Botan was sitting on a beach chair, Hiei having helped her to sit when they got there. Her movements were starting to become more awkward with the growth of their little bundle of joy. Hinageshi was enjoying herself, splashing around in the water with Yukina and Kazuma. Pyrius was watching from the shoreline with pride and a grateful heart. He had never thought he'd be in this position.

"Isn't this nice?" Botan asked her lover, stretching out like a cat ready to nap, a smile on her face. Her hands then moved to her baby bump. She rubbed it lovingly. "This little one can't come fast enough."

"Hn," Hiei hummed, agreeing with the sentiment. He glanced over to his woman, his eyes gently calculating. Botan had no idea what was about to occur. "Do you ever think about the future?"

Botan was taken aback by the strange question, her head tilting in confusion. "Well, of course I do. I'm looking forward to giving birth, though I'm a bit nervous," she admitted before grinning. "But I know it will all be worth it so we can give Hina a good and happy life. We'll go on picnics and take her to the park and teach her to swim. Hinageshi will be so happy to have a little sister. And we'll be just one big happy family."

"Not that," Hiei responded, motioning between the two of them, emphasizing, "Our future."

At that, Botan stared at him blankly, her mouth agape when he dropped down to one knee in front of her on the sandy dune. He held out a beautiful yet simple diamond ring. He didn't even get a chance to ask the question when Botan exclaimed, "Yes, yes, absolutely yes!"

She cried tears of joy, something he was used to with her crazy hormones, and he caught her and held her close to him the best he could with the swell of her stomach. He nuzzled his nose against her cheek, kissing her tears away, and whispered loving words and promises for their future. Everything was as it should be. Hiei had never expected to be this happy, ever, in his life. And all of it was thanks to this ditzy, emotion, strange, and beautiful woman from Sparrowfield.


End file.
